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    Lin Chengbu called back the phone almost as soon as he read the text message clearly, but the female voice that made countless people's teeth itch came from the receiver, and the user you dialed was turned off.

    He reluctantly hung up the phone and dialed again.

    You are calling with...

    "Fuck you." Lin Chengbu slammed his phone on the bed.

    The phone bounced on the mattress and jumped gracefully.

    "Hey!" Lin Chengbu hurriedly jumped over to pick up the phone again. He might not feel bad if the phone was broken. He had been using it for several years, mainly because he would contact him if the Yuanwu tendon was right now...

    Get in touch!

    If you want to get in touch early, you won't let him make such a toss at all!

    Lin Chengbu sat down beside the bed, looking at the phone screen, the upper right corner was broken and leaked.

    After being stunned for a while, he pulled out a notebook and a pen from the drawer of the bedside table. This is a very cute ledger, which Lin Huiyu gave him, so that he can think about his wasted life in front of the ledger.

    But he never remembered it once.

    Start accounting today.

    He wrote a line on the first page.

    -The list of losses and expenses suffered by the Lord

    Then turn to the next page and write down the fuel cost for the two-way trip from the city to Shenqiao, the cost of packing luggage, the cost of comforting the big head, the cost of mental damage when frightened, and the cost of repairing the light leakage of the mobile phone.

    "Let's settle the account slowly." Lin Chengbu closed the book and put it in his carry-on bag.

    There was no news from Yuan Wu for two days in a row. Lin Chengbu contacted all the people he knew about Yuan Wu, and including the people who helped Jiang Chengyu to inquire, none of them had seen Yuan Wu.

    "It doesn't matter-" Lin Chengbu sat in the car, took out his mobile phone and flipped through the address book, "Whoever can't find who... It doesn't matter... Who makes who spends..."

    After finding a phone number, he dialed it: "Dazhu, I'm Lin Chengbu."

    "Fuck, don't fucking call me Dazhu." The other side said unhappily.

    "Zhuzhu," Lin Chengbu smiled, "I'll go to your place now, wait for me at the intersection, it will take about fifteen minutes."

    "You tell me what the lock is first, I have to bring something." said the other side.

    "It's the kind of door that is given when the apartment is handed over. I don't know what kind of lock it is, and it's not a high-end community. It shouldn't be a high-end door, right?" Lin Chengbu said.

    "Okay, I see, see you later."

    Dazhu's name is Li Dazhu. He used to have a good relationship with his classmates who studied auto repair, but Li Dazhu, like him, didn't study auto repair, so he set up a lock-picking company in the past two years.

    "Let me tell you, I'm really a bit of that shit about you..." Li Dazhu got into his car at the intersection, carrying a toolbox, "Is it really your home?"

    "No." Lin Chengbu turned the car around and drove out in the direction of Yuan Wu's house.

    "Fuck, then I can't help you drive," Li Dazhu patted the door, "Stop the car, I want to go down."

    "A friend of mine," Lin Chengbu locked the car door, "is missing, I want to find him."

    "If you're missing, call the police, why are you picking someone's lock?" Li Dazhu looked at him, "Is it your time for the money? Well, I can't open the lock for you. I lost something later and called the police together. Gotta go in..."

    "Am I that kind of unreliable person!" Lin Chengbu said, "Have I ever cheated on you after we've known each other for so many years?"

    "That's not true...you let me think about it." Li Dazhu frowned.

    Lin Chengbu had only been to Yuan Wu's house once, but he remembered the road very clearly, and he basically didn't need to recall, so he drove the car to the downstairs of Yuan Wu's house.

    When he got out of the car, he glanced upstairs with expectation, but the window of Yuan Wu's house was closed and there was no light.

    After a painful ideological struggle, Li Dazhu finally made a difficult decision. He helped Lin Chengbu to unlock the door of Yuanwu's house.

    "Fuck, how long has this house been unoccupied?" Li Dazhu covered his nose with the smell of dust as soon as the door opened.

    Lin Chengbu directly let the dust flutter two sneezes: "No one has been there for at least two years."

    "Damn it, the water, electricity, gas, etc. are all broken, right?" Li Dazhu pressed the switch on the wall, and the light came on, "Hey, is there still electricity?"

    "Yes," Lin Chengbu walked into the room, "I've been paying it... so I told you that it's no problem to open this lock for me, don't worry."

    Li Dazhu stood in the room for a while and then left. Lin Chengbu said that he didn't agree to have a meal for a while. He couldn't get rid of the feeling of being a thief, so he took a taxi and went back.

    Lin Chengbu took out a small book from his bag and opened it.

    - Favor fee for sliding door breaking.

    The house was quite messy, Yuan Wu didn't tidy up very much, the house had been empty for so long after walking, except for the chaos, even if it was gray, he could draw with his fingers everywhere.

    Lin Cheng walked to the balcony to have a look, and there were still several pots of dandelions on the balcony, surprisingly alive.

    Yuan Wu, because he was too lazy to water the flowers, got a regular watering device. As long as the water and electricity are continuous, these flowers will not die... But it is quite ugly to live because the curtains are half drawn, and there is too little time to see the sun, and the leaves are all whitish.

    Lin Chengbu looked at these dandelions and suddenly felt very emotional.

    After a while on the balcony, he turned into the bedroom.

    He had never entered the bedroom. This was the first time. When he opened the bedroom door, he felt a little inexplicable excitement and curiosity.

    Yuan Wu's bedroom is very simple, with a bed, wardrobe, and a small sofa.

    There is no bedside table, it looks like there is no life atmosphere.

    When he turned on the light, Lin Chengbu saw a hideous face on the head of the bed at a glance. He didn't know if it was a monster or a god of death. Yuan Wu put his head under this face every day...

    He also said that his iron frame bed, Yuan Wu's bed was called sick.

    Lin Chengbu opened the wardrobe door, there was no ash in it, and there was a faint fragrance, which made him excited for a while.

    It should be some kind of incense, he used to smell it on Yuan Wu.

    He put his head into the closet to smell it, and looked at the clothes inside, all of which were clean.

    Then... let's get to work.

    Lin Chengbu took off his shirt, threw it on the bed, and went to the kitchen to find a rag and a bucket.

    Before starting work, he took out a small notebook and wrote down a line.

    - The hard work of cleaning up the house (the house that has been unoccupied for two years, it is still messy).

    Yuan Wu sat in front of the bay window with his legs crossed.

    The morning sun is very good, and you can see small golden spots jumping in front of you with your eyes closed.

    He wanted to experience this kind of comfortable morning, and it had been a long time since he felt really relaxed and comfortable.

    But still no.

    When he closed his eyes, he would have the urge to cry.

    He couldn't understand why he was so hypocritical, why he couldn't calm down after so many days.

    it's not your fault.

    do not blame you.

    He repeatedly told himself that Won-shin’s death was not self-inflicted.

    But still can't convince myself.

    The thought of that afternoon and that afternoon's sunshine made his heart palpitate.

    He can still clearly recall Yuan Shen's gaze looking at him through the sparkling water, and the feeling of the knuckles in the palm of his hand when he was holding Yuan Shen's wrist tightly...

    He still remembers every detail from anxiety to despair, the hopelessness when he had to let go of Won Shin's hand in excruciating pain.

    If he doesn't let go, if he persists for one second, two seconds, will Yuan Shen be able to pull away, will Yuan Shen not die?

    If he hadn't given up, wouldn't Won Shin not have died?

    If he didn't hide from Yuan Shen and ignore Yuan Shen's abnormal words and thoughts, wouldn't Yuan Shen not die?

    He opened his eyes and touched a diary beside him. Yuan Shen had too many thoughts. When he was struggling to get a little response from him, if he hadn't avoided...

    Won Shin won't die?

    So many ifs, if only one if is established, won't Yuan Shen not die?

    Yuan Wu threw the diary aside, jumped out of the bay window, and circled around the house in annoyance.

    This is Yuanshen's room. There are traces of Yuanshen everywhere, all kinds of notes with words that he can't understand, and those paintings about death that are drawn on the wall.

    How long has it been? Won Shin yearns for death so much, as much as a ritual.

    Yuan Wu slumped into the sofa, he had to admit that even if they were twins born in an amniotic sac, even if he and Yuan Shen had countless "heart connections" since childhood, he still couldn't imagine going out of Yuan Shen's world.

    Yuan Wu was lying on the sofa, looking at the ceiling.

    It was not until it was dark outside the window that he got up slowly and glanced at the clock on the wall.

    After entering the bathroom and washing his face, he changed his clothes and walked out the door.

    The sun has set, and the wind blowing is a little cool, Yuan Wu looked back at the house behind him.

    This is Yuan Shen's secret. He only told Yuan Wu that he lives here, and neither his grandparents know where he lives.

    Yuan Wu didn't know if he just wanted to tell him when he told him the address, or if he hoped that he would come and have a look, or if he hoped that one day his world would be understood by his relatives.

    relatives, grandparents.

    Yuan Wu frowned, but he could understand how painful his grandparents were.

    The two old people took care of Yuan Shen almost as if they were his life. Every time Yuan Shen fell ill and was hospitalized, they would lose weight.

    He knew what Yuan Shen meant to his grandparents, and the scene when his grandma pointed at him while crying and scolding, he still felt a sharp pain when he remembered it.

    "Did you do it on purpose! How could you not hold him!"

    "You are in better health than him! You are stronger than him! How could you not be able to pull his hand away!"

    "The water plants are so thin! So soft! How can they keep pulling!"

    "Just watch him die! Watch him die! You can let go of him when you watch him die!"

    Yuan Wu waved his hand irritably, turned into the underground garage, and opened his shoulder bag.

    There was a bottle of self-spray paint thrown in the body of the car, which he bought yesterday.

    i'm feeling good.

    He looked at the line of writing next to the car body. He wanted to cover it with paint, but he hesitated for a long time but didn't do it.

    i'm feeling good.

    This was written by Yuan Shen.

    "birds flying high, you know how i feel, sun in the sky, you know how i feel, breed drifting on by, you know how i feel, its a new dawn its a new day, its a new life for me, and im feeling good…”

    Yuan Wu still remembers Yuan Shen while humming a song and slowly writing i'm feeling good on the paper, sketching it thickly, then cutting out a hollowed out pattern of paper, and then shaking the paint can and spraying the line in the car bucket. word situation.

    He was afraid to think of Yuan Shen again, afraid that any trace of Yuan Shen would appear in his space and life, but he couldn't erase his less and less traces after Yuan Shen had disappeared.

    The most common things in Yuanshen's room are the graffiti cans, and he will always carry a few cans in his carry-on bag.

    Yuan Wu has always felt that this is probably his way of venting, just like the graffiti commonly seen on Qinghe Street, venting his emotions with self-promotion.

    It wasn't until he saw the graffiti on the wall of the abandoned factory that it looked like Yuanshen's style, and then he knew that Yuanshen was not venting or showing himself.

    He can't even define himself.

    Yuan Wu drove his car to a small bridge. He found this when he was walking two days ago. It was very quiet, especially during the period before dinner, when only a few children who refused to go home after school were making trouble. passing by.

    He parked the car and sat on the stone bench by the bridge.

    After smoking a cigarette, he took out his mobile phone and turned it on.

    The phone was very quiet, only one text message from Jiang Chengyu and two missed calls from Lin Chengbu.

    - Figured it out and contact me, I want to drink your special notes.

    Yuan Wu looked at Jiang Chengyu's text message and smiled.

    Lin Chengbu's missed time was when he sent a text message, almost only ten seconds apart.

    But what surprised Yuan Wu was that apart from these two phone calls, Lin Chengbu never contacted him again.

    It's not quite his style.

    Yuan Wu opened the call log, the latest contact name was "Doctor Liang", and he dialed.

    "Dr Liang, I'm Yuan Wu," he said after answering the phone, "I tried it, but it doesn't work... I just can't think about these things at a certain time every day... I just think... I can't get past this hurdle, I just feel like...my brother...it's because of me..."

    Yuan Wu closed his eyes and couldn't speak any longer. After he touched a cigarette and lit it, he said softly again: "I know, I don't want to do this, I really... I'm afraid that I will be like this for the rest of my life, sleepy. In the matter of his suicide...I can't even live a normal life...Thank you, I will come to you tomorrow morning."

    After hanging up, he exhaled a cigarette.

    Yuan Wu, how much pain you have, you need how much determination, this kind of thing can not be solved by sleeping, shouting a few times, and traveling.

    The hurt caused by some things is so deep in our hearts that we can't even feel its existence, but we are still affected by it.

    If you want to come out, it's not just about listening to what I say. I said, you have to do it, you have to cooperate, and you have to work hard. It is the efforts of both of us.

    Dr. Liang was introduced by Jiang Chengyu. A long time ago, Jiang Chengyu gave him Dr. Liang's phone number, hoping that he could chat.

    But he... didn't go, he always felt that it was a terrible thing to show a stranger the weakness and sadness that he didn't even want to think about.

    Just like what he said to Lin Chengbu, how can someone else tear my injury apart.

    But some things are not as simple as he thinks, and I can get rid of them without fear of pain.

    He smiled, and even Lin Chengbu went to Dr. Liang behind his back.

    This... Holy Father neurosis.

    When Lin Chengbu finished tidying up Yuan Wu's room, there was a kind of feeling that if he didn't commit a brutal extortion to Yuan Wu in the future, it would not be enough to recover from his contracted work today.

    He washed clothes, sheets, quilt covers, sofa cushions, and all the cloth that could be removed. He even threw the curtains into the bathtub and rubbed them.

    Also torn a piece.

    After washing, he wiped. He wiped all surfaces several times, wiping while sneezing, and mopping the floor several times.

    When all the work was finally done, it was bright outside.

    "Your uncle..." Lin Chengbu looked at the bright sky outside, "Amen."

    Lin Chengbu went to take a shower. The shampoo and body wash in the bathroom were from at least two years ago. He opened it and smelled it.

    After taking a bath, he changed into Yuan Wu's clothes, which made him feel a lot more comfortable. When he lay down on the bed that had just been changed, he snorted comfortably and slammed his butt on the mattress twice.

    Listening to the thin creaking of the mattress, he clicked his tongue, hooligan bed.

    He smacked his butt a few more times.

    This time, there was something else in the creaking sound, and it sounded like a paper jammed somewhere. He sat up and flipped twice.

    Then, following the sound, he felt a crumpled piece of paper in the gap between the mattress and the backrest.

    It should have slipped in and it didn't matter.

    The word Lin Chengbu on the paper was already recognizable, it belonged to Yuan Wu.

    Write an address and a string of numbers, don't know if it's a q number or a phone number.

    He hesitated for a while, then called Jiang Chengyu and read him the address and number: "Do you have an impression? Where is this place? What number?"

    "I don't remember, I didn't hear him mention it," Jiang Chengyu said with sleepiness, "Are you getting up early, or haven't you slept yet?"

    "I didn't sleep," Lin Chengbu said, "did you just sleep?"

    "Ah, it was my first dream at the beginning," Jiang Chengyu yawned, "you can go and see this address, but my suggestion is, yes, you can, don't go there."

    "Well," Lin Chengbu frowned, "Are you afraid that he will be annoying."

    "Didn't he tell you not to look for him everywhere," Jiang Chengyu said, "you don't know him yet. If you really look for him, he can really give you no face at all."

    "I know that," Lin Chengbu smiled, "so I'll ask you about it first."

    "Xiaobu," Jiang Chengyu sighed, "If Yuan Wu is all right, he will treat you like a bird again, I will knock him out and send you to bed."

    "Fuck," Lin Chengbu was stunned for a while, then smiled again after a while, "You may not be able to beat him, right?"

    "I'll make a sneak attack, as long as you don't feel distressed, a stick in the back will definitely fall," Jiang Chengyu said, "I can't stand my rival in love anymore..."

    "Thank you Brother Chengyu." Lin Chengbu said with a smile.

    After hanging up the phone, Lin Chengbu wrote down the address on the note into his mobile phone, took that number and added a friend on q. The name and avatar of a typical wash-cut-browser were displayed, and he took a look. The space is full of "you don't understand how awesome brother is, brother is about to blow up the sun".

    Lin Chengbu turned it off with the urge to slap this person. It is estimated that this q number has nothing to do with Yuan Wu, should it be a phone number?

    But he didn't fight.

    That's right, Yuan Wu said not to look for him everywhere.

    Then don't find it.

    I will stay at your house until you come to me.

    You just bought a house that you haven’t lived in for a few days. If you have the ability, don’t live there.

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