Chapter 17: Lao Lou's Intention Wasn't Just Hand-Holding.

Ultimately, He Guan left with two pots of silver moon wood sorrel — delivered by the shopkeeper's wife after a phone call.

Finding it inconvenient with their hands joined, He Guan suggested, "Why not just hold onto my jacket? Later, I'll need to buy ball-rooted begonias and carry a few bags of fertilizer..."

Lou Dongzang replied, "Give me the pots."

Handing over the bag with flower pots, He Guan said, "It won't help. Soon I'll be carrying fertilizer and won't have a hand free to hold yours."

Yet, he handed them over anyway.

Lou Dongzang just nodded, "Hmm."

He merely wanted to share the load.

Before He Guan could react, Lou Dongzang was the first to release his grip, causing He Guan to pause in surprise.

He thought he'd have to persuade him further.

However, that hand soon returned, gently gripping the hem of He Guan's jacket.

Perhaps not feeling the same security from holding the clothing, Lou Dongzang moved even closer, nearly pressing against his back.

Standing under the open-air flower canopy in bright sunlight, He Guan inexplicably felt a sudden chill.

It felt as if he were being wrapped by a cold snake.

This random association crossed his mind, but he quickly dismissed it.

It being a non-working day, He Guan only had his personal phone with him. Now, it vibrated in his pocket signaling a message.

He Guan said, "Someone's texting me, probably Junyan. Let me check."

As he was replying, Lou Dongzang's brows furrowed slightly.

Today, He Guan had mentioned the driver's name at least five times.

[Du Junyan: Boss, I've spotted the workers who build floral walls here. Should I inquire?]

[He Guan: Yes, ask.]

[Du Junyan: Boss, they're quoting me 300 per square meter. Is that a reasonable price?]

[He Guan: They're ripping you off. Bargain down by 200, and they'll still be making a profit.]

[Du Junyan: ???]

[He Guan: What specialized floral wall craftsmen? They're trying to fool you. The structures in the garden are just wooden frames. I only need carpenters. Normal hourly rates for carpenters are around 80 yuan. If they agree to move the piano and make railings, it's 150 — and that's with them providing the materials. For just the floral wall... If you can't bargain it down to 100 yuan an hour, you might as well quit driving for me. Got it?]

[Du Junyan: Task assuredly accomplished!]

Putting away his phone, He Guan looked up and said, "Let's go."

Taking a step forward, he felt a pull from behind on his clothing.

The man behind was holding onto him, standing still, not moving an inch.

Puzzled, He Guan murmured in acknowledgment and stepped back to face him. He gently grasped the other's wrist, placing his hand on the fabric at his own waist.

He proactively clarified, "Junyan found some carpenters nearby and asked me about the price. He's not very good at haggling, and he's spending my money, so I had to guide him a bit."

Skillfully sidestepping a sensitive topic, He Guan added, "I thought if you joined me for an outing, I wouldn’t have to deal with such issues. I didn’t expect to help him negotiate prices."

After a considerable pause, Lou Dongzang asked, "What about the speakers you promised me?"

He Guan responded, "Shall we purchase them today? I checked the storage room earlier; we already have several sets at home. Hmm, after buying the fertilizer, Junyan should be..."

Du Junyan again.

Lou Dongzang furrowed his brows, "Can we not talk about him?"

He Guan: "..."

It was rare for Lou Dongzang to show his emotions, and He Guan hadn't anticipated this being the trigger.

He Guan remarked, "You're not pleased?"

Lou Dongzang simply replied, "Hmm."

He added, "Not familiar with him."

Reflecting on it, He Guan realized he might have overmentioned the driver today.

Lou Dongzang didn't have any particular connection with the driver, and incessantly bringing him up might be irritating.

Acknowledging his misstep, He Guan said, "I apologize. I won't mention him anymore."

He revised his statement, "After buying the fertilizer for the flowers, we'll get some groceries. Along the way, let's pick up some daily necessities - dental floss and some adhesive hooks. The dental floss is for you to pick your teeth after meals. Also, there are too many things in the kitchen; we could use the hooks to organize a bit."

Lou Dongcang replied, "Alright."

Forty minutes later, He Guan was holding several bags of fertilizer and a bag of ball-rooted begonias, along with a few pine saplings. He placed everything in the trunk of the Rolls-Royce.

While he was storing the items, Lou Dongcang still clung to the hem of his clothing. Du Junyan approached to help, but the blind man sensed him and looked up.

It was then that Du Junyan realized - the man who had always accompanied their boss had his eyes perpetually closed.

He took a half-step back, suddenly feeling a chill down his spine.

He originally intended to help, but he was startled away.

Lou Dongcang turned his face and placed the sorrel he was holding into the trunk.

From the corner of his eye, He Guan noticed Lou Dongcang placing things in the trunk. He stepped up to steady the flower pot to prevent the soil from spilling inside the car, suggesting, "Junyan, you start the car."

Du Junyan responded, "Yes, boss."

After closing the trunk, He Guan held back Du Junyan and lightly pulled Lou Dongcang who was standing nearby, saying, "Why are you upset with him? He's just the driver. It's not like I'm never going to mention his name again. Lou, that's unrealistic. He needs to drive us around, I have to call him over, right?"

He had noticed Lou Dongcang's discomfort when buying the fertilizer. Reflecting on it, he thought it might be because he kept mentioning someone else, making Lou Dongcang feel neglected.

Even though he mentioned Du Junyan at home, after all, Du Junyan wasn't hovering around He Guan.

Lou Dongcang was always with him.

This was the first time Lou Dongcang had been out since he went blind, and he was more sensitive.

He Guan understood but felt the need to clarify. After all, he merely mentioned him casually, he wasn't a part of their daily life, just a driver.

Unexpectedly, Lou Dongcang asked, "Why do you call him Junyan?"

He Guan was taken aback, "…What?"

Bursting into laughter, He Guan exclaimed, "You've been bothered by that this whole time?"

Lou Dongcang simply responded, "…Yes."

He Guan retorted, "Don't I call you 'Lou' as well?"

Lou Dongcang countered, "It makes me sound old."

In disbelief, He Guan inquired, "You think so?"

After a brief speechless moment, he chuckled, saying, "I call you that out of affection, you know?"

Lou Dongcang remained silent.

He Guan remarked, "I only use such nicknames for those I'm very close to. Do you hear me calling Du Junyan 'Old Du'? No, you don't."

Seeing Lou Dongcang's unchanged expression, he suddenly felt a touch of frustration and exhaled, saying, "Lou, have you misunderstood something?"

"It's always been me trying to win your favor, or else I wouldn't even have a place to sleep."

The feeling of genuine emotions being misplaced is truly awful.

Leaning against the trunk of the car with his arms crossed, He Guan's expression gradually relaxed. He gazed at the surrounding flora, commenting listlessly, "I live in your house, my job was secured with your guarantee. It's almost as if I'm..."

It's almost as if I'm parasitically relying on you.

But he didn't voice those words.

Some thoughts are better kept unspoken, as saying them aloud might ignite unforeseen explosions between people.

Whether He Guan is lying or speaking sincerely, his demeanor always appears indifferent.

When lying, it manifests as flippancy; when being sincere, it often appears absent-minded, making one question the authenticity of his words.

Having been thrust into adulthood prematurely, he has a veneer of maturity despite his young age. Regular interactions with all sorts of people for business necessitate maintaining this impeccable facade.

However, his sincerity is never evident in his expressions, but rather in his tone.

Because Lou Dongcang is blind, he effortlessly ignores He Guan's facial expressions and focuses on his tone.

It sounds like sorrow.

As soon as the words left his mouth, He Guan realized his emotions were amiss, he rubbed his face, refraining from continuing.

He just wanted to enjoyably buy some flowers and daily necessities and hire some carpenters for home renovations.

These tasks weren't originally necessary.

If he didn't wish to spruce up the Cangdong Garden, he could compromise and reside in the mansion with Lou Dongcang. The estate is vast, and he could have settled in a front courtyard.

This way, they might never encounter one another.

For a lifetime, neither would realize the other's presence in the expansive mansion.

He Guan quickly adjusted his mood, and when he spoke again, his voice was tinged with mirth.

He said, "Let's go. The driver must be getting impatient. I've given him other tasks, so we need to catch up quickly."

Just like now, he referred to Junyan simply as "the driver."

He Guan had made the change.

Instinctively, Lou Dongcang took a step forward.

Leaning against the car, He Guan didn't flinch, directly facing Lou Dongcang's deeply furrowed brow.

The other man extended his hand, resting it on the car hood beside He Guan.

He Guan queried, "What are you doing?"

Lou Dongcang replied, "I... I've been ill, making it hard for me to control my thoughts."

Seeing Lou Dongcang's apologetic demeanor, He Guan paused, motionless, waiting to hear his explanation: "Go on."

As He Guan spoke, he realized his tone was lazy, tinged with an instigating edge.

Had he been facing someone with a short temper, He Guan might already be in a skirmish.

While he seemed to have processed his emotions, he recognized, as the conversation continued, that he was still upset.

However, Lou Dongcang didn’t take offense. Instead, he drew closer, their foreheads nearly touching, and whispered, "I'm sorry."

He Guan didn’t reply, his gaze lingering on Lou Dongcang's lips.

Lou Dongcang said, "I'm not... blaming you. I just..."

He seldom expressed such emotions, appearing hesitant. After pondering for several seconds, he found the right word, "I'm just... jealous."

He Guan was taken aback.

"Living in the garden after our marriage is your right. Without you, the agreement with my elder brother would have driven me mad. From the moment we met... you've taken care of me."

"You're wonderful, He Guan."

"It's just that..."

Lou Dongcang continued, "It's me... I was upset because you kept mentioning him."

There was a hint of grievance in his voice, soft and low, as if his lips brushed against He Guan's temple, "We had agreed it was just the two of us coming out..."

It took He Guan a good two minutes to recover from his astonishment, muttering in confusion, "I thought you wouldn’t mind... he's just a driver... he can't possibly live with us..."

Lou Dongcang stated, "He's taller than me."

With his acute hearing, Lou Dongcang could discern that Du Junyan's voice came from a slightly higher point than most people's.

He Guan chuckled, "Not by much though. Why the fuss over a bit of height? If you're envious of everyone taller than you, what about those over two meters? That must really bother you!"

Lou Dongcang's lips twitched as if he wanted to say something.

He Guan heard him ask, "Are you still mad?"

Rather than answering the question, He Guan remarked, "Don't put your hand on the car hood; it's dusty."

Lou Dongcang responded, "Alright."

As he started to withdraw his hand, He Guan caught one of his fingers.

Holding onto his index finger, He Guan drew Lou Dongcang's hand toward his own palm. His knuckles brushed along Lou Dongcang's fingers, tracing them upwards.

One joint, then another.

Eventually, at the base of the thumb, he grasped Lou's hand.

He Guan remarked, "I wasn't planning to hold hands."

*

He Guan shopped at the supermarket with clear intent. After getting dental floss and adhesive hooks, he was ready to leave but was pulled back by the stationary figure beside him.

The sudden tug caused He Guan to bump into Lou's arm, asking, "What's wrong?"

Lou Dongcang murmured, "It smells delicious."

As He Guan was about to rub the spot where he'd been bumped, the man holding his hand used his other to affectionately rub He Guan's forehead, mentioning, "I want to eat that cake you bought the other day."

The gentle ruffling of his hair by Lou almost rendered He Guan speechless. After pondering for a couple of seconds, he inquired, "That wasn't bought here. What aroma did you detect?"

The gesture was so delicate; it felt as if they were brushing against a cloud.

Household goods were at the entrance of the supermarket, and the warm air blowers were on, creating a flow of air with no distinct scent.

For a moment, He Guan was puzzled by Lou Dongcang's observation.

He led Lou Dongcang, glancing across the shelves. After walking several steps, he finally spotted a bustling bakery counter at a distant corner.

He Guan commented, "You have a keen nose. There's a pastry section over there. Let's take a look. I'll grab a cart."

Intercepting a store attendant about to return a shopping cart, he took it for himself.

Lou Dongcang offered, "Let me handle it."

He Guan replied, "It's just a cart."

Lou Dongcang reasoned, "You pick the items. It's crowded."

He Guan got straight to the point, "You don't want to jostle through the crowd with me?"

After a moment of silence, Lou Dongcang honestly responded, "Right."

With a brisk energy, He Guan declared, "A life without the hustle of supermarkets is incomplete. Let's leave the cart here and go together."

Without waiting for a response, he pulled the still-processing Lou Dongcang into the throng of shoppers.

The surrounding surge of people closed in, and for Lou Dongcang, it felt like stepping into a dense wall exerting pressure from all sides.

He experienced a brief moment of panic, manifesting physically as sweat on his palms.

Yet, her grip on my hand tightened.

Lourong Zang was pulled by He Guan to the counter. Before he could steady himself, he was handed a box of cakes.

Still warm to the touch.

The crowd surged forward, a cacophony of chattering and clamor.

Lourong Zang held onto the freezer filled with cakes with one hand, while the other was held by He Guan, and for the first time he felt...

Going out might not be so bad after all.

They successfully raided the discount section, holding onto rice rolls, molten sesame balls, semi-melted cheese, and freshly baked, still-warm chocolate cake, ready to check out.

He Guan was a bit weary, murmuring as they queued up at the end of the line, "Why is this supermarket offering discounts at noon? Other supermarkets do it in the evening... Some man just elbowed me earlier, nearly causing internal injury."

Lourong Zang gently massaged his fingertips.

They were almost separated by the crowd, but thankfully He Guan grabbed Lourong Zang just in time.

His grip was so tight back then, his fingers must be aching now.

Lourong Zang: "Perhaps they're on sale all day today?"

He Guan: "That might be the case."

When they finally emerged, their shopping cart, left momentarily unattended, had disappeared.

He Guan, laden with goodies, leaned back against Lourong Zang, indicating his presence.

His hair brushed against Lourong Zang's ear.

Each time Lourong Zang heard the person in front move, he would step forward, followed by He Guan.

When it was their turn, He Guan paid and got a bag, only then parting from that close posture.

He took Lourong Zang's wrist, placed his right hand on the bag, and said, "This is on you. I'm worn out, Lourong. That crowd in the supermarket really did a number on my hand."

Thus, Lourong Zang successfully reclaimed his unique nickname.

*

After leaving the supermarket, they went to a nearby authorized mobile store.

It was noon, and the store was empty save for a single salesgirl.

As the salesgirl saw He Guan and Lourong Zang enter and was about to greet them, He Guan raised his hand to form a large "X".

The salesgirl: "?"

He Guan placed a finger to his lips, signaling her to be quiet. He typed on his phone and showed her: "The person with me is visually impaired, and the noise earlier distressed him. Could you please refrain from speaking? I'd like the latest top-tier model phone and a noise-canceling headphone, please."

The salesgirl nodded.

He Guan guided Lourong Zang through the store, browsing the display phones.

The push and shove at the supermarket had left its mark on him, while Lourong Zang had been troubled by the noise.

They sought some quietude.

The salesgirl appeared different the second time.

He Guan took the phone and headphones, glancing at her a few times before noticing she had changed her shoes.

She had swapped her heels for relatively silent sneakers.

After paying, He Guan typed again and showed her: "Can we leave tips here?"

The salesgirl smiled, mimicking He Guan's earlier gesture and gave him a cross sign.

This time, He Guan typed in larger and bold letters: "Thank you."

The salesgirl packed everything, handed him the bag, and waved goodbye.

Lourong Zang remained silent throughout. Once they were outside, he asked, "Why was no one talking inside the store?"

He Guan replied, "We got lucky today; we met a kind soul. I told her about our experience at the supermarket, and she changed her shoes and remained silent for your comfort."

Lourong Zang: "Hmm."

Teasingly, He Guan asked, "Why no comments from the peanut gallery?"

Lourong Zang: "?"

He Guan continued, "Why didn't you thank her?"

After a pause, Lourong Zang said, "Shouldn't I be thanking you first? Had you not informed her, she wouldn't have acted that way."

He Guan, taken aback, remarked, "You're pretty good at pacifying, aren't you?"

Lourong Zang: "I'm not."

He Guan responded in jest, leading him to the elevator, "Oh sure, but you do seem rather adept at appeasing me."

Their conversation was cut off by the closing elevator doors.

Nearing noon, early signs of spring discreetly emerged. At some unnoticed moment, the willows by the distant riverbank began to radiate a gentle green.

They were budding.

Author's note:

For those new to following my work, you might not be aware... I tend to race against deadlines. So if I say I'll update on a particular day, it's highly probable it'll be that very evening, perhaps around 11:50 PM...

However, there's good news. I've recently found that I can update every other day. So, that's the plan moving forward. Since today is March 16th, expect the next update on March 18th. I'll try to write a bit more.

On March 18th, it'll likely be around 11 PM or later. For those of you in school, it's better to sleep early. Reading a bit earlier or later doesn't make much difference.