Chapter 28

During Su Yan's absence, Xia Tingwan worked hard like never before.

He immersed himself in the state of Gu Fei as much as possible every day, even when communicating with Aunt Rong and the others at Xiangshan's home, he gestured with his hands.

Although it was very inconvenient every day, Aunt Rong and the others knew that he was looking for a state, and they were very patient.

Autumn is leaving day by day.

When city H occasionally cools down suddenly, the frigid cold makes people on the street suddenly wear thick clothes.

Xia Tingwan has always been afraid of the cold. She wears a wool hat and sunglasses when she goes out, so that her face is more tightly covered, so it is not easy to be recognized by others.

One day he went to 7-11 to buy cigarettes, but he was too immersed in Gu Fei's world for a while, and he used gestures when buying cigarettes.

The clerk didn't lift his head, just took a pack of red Marlboro in the direction of his finger and threw it to him, Xia Tingwan suddenly became serious, he clearly wasn't referring to this one.

He held down the pack of cigarettes with his hand, and stubbornly pointed to the black ice popping beads.

"What are you doing?" The clerk glanced at Xia Tingwan impatiently.

Xia Tingwan pointed to Bao Hongwan, shook his finger, and pushed it back, but he still insisted that he would not speak.

"Who knows which one you want?" The young clerk rudely threw out a sentence, turned around and took a few packs of different Marlboros down, and threw it in front of Xia Tingwan rudely: "Well, you can choose your own way. Right."

Xia Tingwan lowered his head and picked out the black ice popping beads he wanted, and when he lowered his head to take the money, he heard the clerk mutter again: "It's so annoying, there are still people waiting behind, I don't know if it's a real dumb or a fake dumb. ."

Xia Tingwan suddenly raised her head and stared at the clerk, but the clerk didn't even look at him, just skillfully shoved the change back to him.

He couldn't help but look back at the few people in line behind him. They all looked at him with indifferent eyes. Although he didn't show much impatience, he still suddenly felt that his face was embarrassed. Hot and red.

He watched the crowd with some subtle eyes and walked out of the 7-11 store. For the first time, he felt so out of place.

Although he wasn't really dumb, he suddenly felt for the first time how powerless it was to lose the ability to speak at such a moment.

When walking out with Marlboro in his pocket, Xia Ting was standing on the street late, looking at the people hurriedly walking in front of him, no one looked at him, he felt small and a little lonely.

At that moment, he suddenly felt that he had touched a real Gu Fei's soul.

In the turbulent autumn wind, he took out his mobile phone and typed out two words thoughtfully, "aphasia".

Aphasia may not only refer to the lack of personal communication skills.

A dumb person, the deeper sadness, is completely aphasia in the communication between people and in the society.

He suddenly thought of "Looking"—

Gu Feigang came to the big city in the north to look for Xu Rong. He listened to the northern accent with difficulty and walked back and forth in the Academy of Fine Arts. He didn't know who to ask or where to start.

In the end, Gu Fei held a bottle of Coke and sat in the stand next to the basketball court, staring blankly at the boys of his age who were running on the court and shouting loudly. No one noticed him, nor did he talk to him.

Written in the novel-

"Gu Fei sat until the evening, until the crowd on the court gradually dissipated. He stood up, picked up the unfinished bottle of Coke in a daze, and walked outside the school gate. In the night, his shadow was like a thin tree. tree."

Xia Ting raised his head late, his eyes were a little sad, he lit a cigarette, and stood in the cold wind and blew a smoke ring.

The night in H City is getting earlier and earlier. At more than six o'clock, the sunset has faded into a lead blue, sprinkled on the gray streets, making people feel lonely.

He suddenly understood more about Gu Fei's love and yearning for Xu Rong.

In the script of "Looking", Gu Fei had no lines at all, but Xu Rong often muttered to himself.

Xu Rong is probably the kind of exaggerated young man who talks a lot, some of which are stupid and unnutritious.

But every time Xu Rong spoke, Gu Fei listened very carefully, not even willing to miss a word

Xia Tingwan imagined that he was Gu Fei. In his lonely life, Xu Rong was the first boy who was willing to talk to him so much. Perhaps for him, every syllable and every vivid word of Xu Rong, All fascinating even beyond sex.

Because this is the first time in his life that he feels accepted as an equal by his peers.

That feeling was like a miracle in Gu Fei's heart.

Xia Ting thought about it late, and suddenly felt a burst of sadness in her heart.

He can understand Gu Fei.

He couldn't describe the first time he took off his clothes in front of Su Yan and revealed his ugly scars.

He shed tears weakly, but his heart was like a torrent pouring down.

Even if he withers, even if he is shattered without anyone knowing.

In this world, there is still a person who is willing to walk through the crowd, stretch out a warm hand to him, and tell him—

You still have me.

Isn't that a miracle?

After Xia Ting came home late, he drew all Xu Rong's lines in the script of "Search" with a highlighter.

Before, he had been focusing on how to express Gu Fei, but now he suddenly realized that every word of Xu Rong was equally important to Gu Fei. He had to memorize Xu Rong's lines very seriously, every emotional turn, every time A tone fluctuates.

Because the real Gu Fei must have listened very seriously, and his emotions flowed, as if he was dancing a silent and graceful waltz with Xu Rong's words.

...

In the evening, Xia Ting was lying in bed with Su Yan before going to bed. It was morning on Su Yan's side, but Su Yan looked tired and pale.

"You look so tired, Su Yan." Xia Tingwan put her phone on the bedside table, lay on the pillow, looked at Su Yan in the video with some anxiety, and whispered, "Is the work not going well?"

"Well, it's a little troublesome, but it can be solved." Su Yan nodded, "How about you, are you okay?"

"It's all good." Xia Ting paused for a while, and said a little aggrievedly: "I just... miss you. Su Yan, you didn't reply to my message yesterday."

"I was too busy yesterday, so I didn't take care of it for a while." Su Yan said with a hint of apology in his eyes, "But I dreamed of you at night."

"Really?" Xia Tingwan's eyes suddenly lit up.

"Well, it's actually a dream, but it's actually something that happened in the past." Su Yan said slowly: "I dreamed that you stayed up late and smoked three packs of cigarettes to play games. When I woke up and saw that you were still awake, The ashtray was full of cigarette butts. I was so angry that I threw all your cigarettes out of the window on the third floor. You were so frightened that time that you didn’t dare to talk to me for a day.”

As he spoke, he seemed to be in a trance. He lowered his eyes and was silent for a while before continuing: "When I woke up, I felt very regretful."

Su Yan raised his head and looked at Xia Tingwan, his eyes were a little deep and he said, "If only I hadn't been so fierce to you at that time, I feel sorry for thinking that you are so scared that your eyes are red. Sometimes, I always feel that I didn't do my best. it is good."

Xia Tingwan felt unspeakable uneasiness and discomfort in her heart, which was rarely seen in Su Yan.

Su Yan is so powerful that he seldom wastes time regretting such a weak and futile act, let alone something so trivial many years ago.

"Su Yan, you spoil me enough." Xia Tingwan whispered, "really, no one can treat me like you."

When he said this, he suddenly remembered something. He stretched out his hand and took Zippo's cigarette case by the bed, and opened it to Su Yan: "Look at the cigarette case I bought, 16 sticks, it's easier to remember this way. , I will only smoke one box of this a week in the future, an average of two per day."

Su Yan couldn't help laughing when he saw it, like coaxing a kitten: "It's so good."

"Su Yan," Xia Ting said softly after seeing his expression, "I want to kiss you."

"How do you kiss?" Su Yan asked.

"That's it." Xia Tingwan said, blushing close to the phone, and kissing Su Yan's lips on the screen.

In front of Su Yan, he acted like a spoiled child just like instinct. Although I will feel a little embarrassed, but such a boring thing has not been done less often.

"Small sweet bean bag."

Su Yan looked at him in the video, with a gentle color in his light gray eyes, "It's getting late over there, sleep?"

Xia Tingwan was indeed a little sleepy, and nodded, "Then I hang up?"

"No." Su Yan's eyes flashed with reluctance, and he said softly, "Baby, I'll watch you sleep, I'll hang it up later when I go to wash."

"Yeah." Xia Tingwan shyly curled up into the bed. Under Su Yan's gaze, she closed her eyes and fell asleep sweetly.

The next morning, Xia Tingwan was woken up by Zhao Nanshu's phone call.

"Boss, get up quickly—" Zhao Nanshu's voice was very anxious: "The "On the Road" program team released the trailer for the first two episodes on the Internet, and they don't know what they are. Look."

Xia Tingwan was in a daze and didn't react yet. After a simple answer, he went to the bathroom to get the electric toothbrush, then came back and sat in front of the computer while brushing his teeth while watching.

He hasn't been on Weibo for a long time, and Zhao Nanshu and the others are usually running the business, so Zhao Nanshu sent him a private message to the official Weibo of the "On the Road" program group.

The latest one is a three-minute short video titled "On the Road" the first season of the Thailand chapter preview, and it has only been posted for less than two hours, and the amount of forwarding and comments are already jaw-dropping.

Xia Tingwan clicked on the comment subconsciously and glanced at it, but only after looking at it, her face suddenly turned blue.

Thousands of people liked the top one, saying, "I've been to Thailand too, and I've always been in a double car. The best actor can be treated specially? You can black face and take five people. Did you use your travel funds privately? Have a good time."

The following several articles are similar in content, and he didn't have time to read them carefully.

Xia Tingwan took a deep breath and his fingers trembled slightly. He hesitated for a few seconds before finally clicking on the video.

He hasn't seen many variety shows, and he doesn't know much about this kind of trailer, but he just thinks the beginning of the movie is really beautiful.

This time, TBN and Shaoguang spent a lot of money to hire a well-known foreign photographer of natural scenery. In addition to variety shows, they also strive to show the magnificent and vigorous exotic scenery.

The tropical style of Chiang Mai, the colorful parasols, and the pink sunset are really breathtakingly beautiful under such generous photography.

But as the first 30 seconds of scenery and the introduction to Chiang Mai passed, and the interactive editing between MCs gradually began, Xia Tingwan's face became worse and worse.

The preview of the first season must include the program team's introduction to the formulation of the rules, and of course the editing of the capital budget. When everyone was discussing, Xia Tingwan remembered that she had said a lot, but it happened that Sentence: "Will 5,000 RMB be a little bit?" It was cut out.

This is just the beginning, and it gets even worse after that.

Xia Tingwan remembered that she was indeed very uncomfortable when she rode a tandem car for the first time.

But didn't expect it to be so bad when it was edited.

When the photographer was shooting several other MCs laughing and chatting, the pictures were intertwined harmoniously, but when the camera moved to him, he was hiding in the corner alone, looking out of the two cars with a sullen face, it really looked like a stinky face There is no meaning of integration.

The editor also introduced a suspenseful narrative here, "But what happened to Xia Tingwan?"

The question text, marked with special bubbles, makes all viewers involuntarily want to explore the reason behind it.

Then came the fast-paced editing, and soon came the conversation between him and Xing Le under the canopy behind the restaurant.

This paragraph made Xia Tingwan feel chills all over.

He suddenly remembered what Ji Zhan reminded him when he left, even if it was a private conversation, Xing Le's follow-up photography was always following, as long as there is a photographer, be careful.

He remembered that he clearly explained a lot to Xing Le. Because of the car accident, he had never driven a car again, and when the car was too bumpy, it would be uncontrollably uncomfortable.

But the whole paragraph was cut, and there was only one sentence left, which he seemed to take for granted: "Lele, the two-wheeled car is too jerky. I feel uncomfortable when braking and accelerating."

Because of this completely personal reason to ask the captain, combined with the appearance of being in poor condition on the tandem, how can it not make people feel that he is playing a big name.

What made him disgusted the most was that although the program team cut his part like this, of course they would not be stupid enough to obviously slander their MC, so they exaggerated the promise of Xing Le and others to take a taxi for him. It became his tolerance and protection, and in the end he forcibly dropped the landing point back. This is the core of a loving team traveling together.

But ending with such a preview will only make the audience's dissatisfaction with him even more fueled, and the emotions that have nowhere to vent will only be poured out in extraordinarily intense language.

Just a few minutes after he clicked on the video to watch, the number of retweets and comments continued to soar. Now it seems that even if the program group does not buy it this time, the hot search will be finalized.

Xia Tingwan didn't want to watch it, but he couldn't control his hand and refreshed the comments. Almost all the hot comments were scolding him.

The second line immediately following the first line is a very straightforward sarcasm: "After a few years of black-faced actor, there is no movement in his works, but his temper is good. [Dog head]"

Xia Ting sat in the seat for a long time, until the toothpaste foam became bitter in his mouth, and then he stood up blankly. He even thought for a few seconds before realizing that he should go to the bathroom.

He rinsed his mouth repeatedly, until the last mouthful of water was spit out, and suddenly he felt nauseated.

He retched a few times at the sink, and when he looked up, Xia Tingwan saw his face in the mirror was unusually pale.

Once again, he felt overwhelmed with fear.

It turns out that he works so hard to perform well, but as long as the editor moves his fingers, he can create a completely different person from his invention.

In fact, don't know how long it has been, he always has a vague feeling that he doesn't really fit in this circle, and every year, the ecology of the circle is changing, and he is becoming more and more out of tune.

He has never been good at getting along with the public, he can't interact with fans, and he can't manage character design. In the past few years, this shortcoming seems to be less fatal.

In those few years, unlike now, many celebrities still run Weibo by themselves, and so does he.

After "Whale Talk" won the award, he also used Weibo for a period of time, but sometimes he posted the content of his life, and the response was always polarized.

On the one hand, there are always people holding him, but on the other hand, there always seems to be such a group of people who hate him to the bone.

After marrying Su Yan, once Su Yan took him to bet a few times on a luxury cruise ship on the high seas. It's because he was sprayed, saying that he squeezed into a wealthy family to show off his wealth clumsily.

Gradually, he became more and more reticent in his channels to the public. To a certain extent, he may have vaguely realized early on that the public did not like him as much as he seemed.

What they love is an extremely rebellious illusion that coincides with Xiao Xia in "Whale Talk", and what they love is him who was surrounded by the aura of the actor at that time.

Popular love is noisy and short-lived.

After the passage of time, the remaining real him is more like an unbearable shadow in people's eyes and is not understood.

The phone kept ringing, Xia Tingwan walked slowly to the table and saw that the caller ID was Zhou Yang.

He couldn't press the answer button.

He collapsed on the bed, breathing hard.

In fact, he has always had this problem. Whenever there is any bad news, when Zhou Yang looks for him, he can't wait to hide in the cave, pretending that there is no signal and can't be contacted, or simply pretending that he has disappeared.

He knew he had to grow up and he couldn't handle things like this anymore, but the feeling of suffocation still overwhelmed him like a tide. He buried his head in the quilt, and after a while, he sent a WeChat message to Zhou Yang with trembling fingers: "I'll call you in half an hour."

Just give him half an hour to slow down, he only needs this half an hour, and then he will work hard and be strong.

After lying down for half an hour late, Xia Ting finally reluctantly recovered herself and called Zhou Yang.

Zhou Yang's tone was very angry, obviously angry.

Xia Tingwan told Zhou Yang about everything during the filming in Thailand. He was really aggrieved. He really paid attention to it, but he was randomly spliced ​​and edited by the program, and finally this effect was broadcast. s things.

Zhou Yang asked Xia Tingwan what his plans were, and Xia Tingwan was also in a mess, not knowing what to do next.

Zhou Yang asked again, thinking that if the full film of "On the Road" was released, it would give the public a worse or better impression. Xia Tingwan said subconsciously, better.

But then he hesitated for a moment, and frankly, he really didn't know.

Zhou Yang sighed deeply and said in a low voice, "You didn't go to the filming of the third and fourth episodes, and the program crew didn't contact us for so long, but at the same time, they took you malicious editing to hype. Behind this, it is estimated that It's really Ye Bingwen who is playing the trick."

While the two were talking, Lu Xiangnan's phone was called again. Xia Tingwan and Zhou Yang talked and then answered Lu Xiangnan's call. At first, he thought that Lu Xiangnan had seen the trailer, so he came to ask him, but he did not expect Lu Xiangnan. He opened his mouth and said directly: "Ting Wan, the audition for "Xun" is expected to start next week. Xu Zhe's choice for Xu Rong has long been his favorite. After we talked about the other party's willingness to cooperate, we decided it directly. He is very special. I'm glad. But Gu Fei has a lot of choices of actors. Most of the people Xu Zhe has contacted before are willing to try it out. Your challenge is quite severe, so you have to be prepared."

Xia Tingwan hadn't recovered from the blow of "On the Road". Hearing this series of information, he couldn't help feeling suffocated for a while. He looked up and asked, "It's decided to play Xu Rong? Who is it?"

"He Yanxi."

When Xia Ting heard the name late, He Yanxi's face crossed his mind, and he couldn't help but understand Xu Zhe very well.

He Yanxi is definitely one of the most outstanding actors in the Mesozoic generation. He has an outstanding resume for more than ten years since his debut. He has hardly ever made a film with a bad reputation. In terms of awards, he is only one Golden Horse Award away from winning the three Golden Actors.

He Yanxi's business ability cannot be said, but more importantly, this man's looks and temperament are really suitable for Xu Rong.

Xia Tingwan didn't speak to He Yanxi, but looked at He Yanxi from a distance.

He Yanxi is undoubtedly the kind of man in life that anyone who sees it will notice him.

But in the movies, he is often able to magically reduce the perfection of his appearance to several grades. He has played a restaurant owner, played a tricycle driver, and played many, many little people, no matter if you look at this person's facial features objectively No matter how handsome, in the atmosphere of the movie, he can miraculously disappear from the crowd.

Later, some film critics made a very accurate evaluation of He Yanxi, this person is good at playing ordinary people.

He has carefully pondered every movement, permeating the details of ordinary people familiar to the public, shrugging his shoulders, secretly picking his teeth with the tip of his tongue in his mouth, fluttering eyes, in those not so elegant movements, He perfectly hides his true identity and builds an image that is naturally plump in the lens.

This is important for the character Xu Rong.

Xu Rong is also handsome, but the handsomeness of this character is not something that handsome male stars in the film industry can perform with their true colors.

Xu Rong was handsome, with a kind of force that forced his breath to his throat.

Once a person has a lot of energy in his appearance, it is impossible to be so calm and not so tall.

His handsomeness belongs to a little person who is a little better-looking among ordinary people, and he also has an air of complacent and self-satisfied in it.

When you look at him, you should feel the turmoil and impetuousness in this young boy's heart. He cannot bear it, is not heavy, and is not so confident.

This delicate scale, Xia Tingwan wanted to come, indeed He Yanxi was the best able to grasp.

"He Yanxi is indeed suitable." Xia Ting thought for a while and said softly.

"He Yanxi will come to play opposite roles during the audition, so Xu Zhe will definitely take his feelings and tendencies into consideration."

Xia Tingwan took a deep breath, he knew what Lu Xiangnan meant, and He Yanxi had already made a decision, so his opinion must also be crucial in the consideration of Gu Fei's casting.

"Then Gu Fei, besides me, who else will audition?"

"Lu Ping, Xu Luofei, and Shimiao."

In fact, Xia Tingwan is very familiar. In terms of age and appearance, he is indeed a very suitable candidate in the circle, but when he heard the name Shimiao, he couldn't help repeating it again: "Shimiao?"

"Well." Lu Xiangnan paused before saying, "That's Shi Miao. Compared with the other two, he should be the strongest enemy. He is young, has aura, and has cooperated with He Yanxi. Advantage."

Xia Tingwan was a little lost.

He couldn't say what he felt, but at that moment, he might have felt a shallow sense of loss.

Shi Miao is very young, he should have just turned 20, but he is the youngest actor in the limelight recently.

On the one hand, Shi Miao is indeed too good-looking, even in the entertainment industry, he can be called handsome and outstanding.

His face is flawless, the chin, the corners of the eyes, and the tip of the nose are all sharp and delicate, but the eyebrows are well-formed, neutralizing the sharpness of the facial features, but giving him a kind of aloof air.

On the other hand, Shi Miao has acting skills, which is completely different from the usual little fresh meat.

He and He Yanxi's "Destiny" played a pair of assassin brothers. Shi Miao was also nominated for Best Actor. Although he lost to his predecessor He Yanxi, he also won the Best Newcomer Award and won a lot of awards both inside and outside the industry. affim.

When Shi Miao was born, it really looks like Xia Tingwan back then.

They also have the absolute best looks at the time, and they have works that can prove their acting skills and talents as soon as they debut.

Although Shi Miao's achievements can't be compared with Xia Tingwan's, the whole circle pays attention to him, the public favors him, and places high hopes on him. All of this is very similar to what Xia Tingwan experienced back then.

In fact, there are quite a few analogies between Shi Miao and Xia Tingwan, and even Xia Tingwan has read several film reviews with this content.

It's just that now, he has become an outdated actor who is weak in his mouth and has exhausted his aura. But Shi Miao is a rising star with limitless future.

His career is twilight, and it is regarded as a lesson from the past. He chews on it, and then writes an article to exhort a newcomer like Shimiao.

Xia Tingwan suddenly felt a trance.

He has been silent for a long time, and wants to prove himself again by playing Gu Fei, and the young Shi Miao also wants to cooperate with an international director like Xu Zhe to reach the peak in one fell swoop.

He and Shi Miao are like a reincarnation in the circle.

They shone in different time dimensions like stars, but they collided fatefully.

This competition seems to be destined.

After finishing the phone call with Lu Xiangnan, Xia Tingwan saw the message Zhou Yang sent him later, saying that the legal department, which he had never believed before, finally got a message back and asked him to come to TBN tomorrow to talk.

finally come.

Xia Tingwan thought to herself.

The reality show team works in an orderly manner, and there must be Ye Bingwen's inspiration behind it. On the audition side, he is facing a young rival.

Xia Ting felt a tidal wave of pressure rushing towards him in the evening.

He casually clicked on the computer page with the mouse, and saw that the forwarding volume and comments of the trailer of "On the Road" continued to increase wildly, and he knew that most of the comments were scolding him. smiled.

The willful inertia of five years made him instinctively afraid of pressure. Even if he told himself to be strong over and over again, he would still feel a nervous stagnation when breathing.

In fact, he should have known long ago that life is never easy—whether it's for an unknown person or a big star that everyone is watching.

As early as when Su Yan built a safe and secure fortress for him, perhaps he had always quietly understood this in his heart.

He was not born with a golden spoon in his mouth, nor was he a little prince who did not eat human suffering.

He is a little beast with bruises and bruises that broke out from the cold wind. He has seen cruelty and savagery, how could he not understand it.

But because of this, he became greedy and weak.

He used Su Yan's love for him to escape all the hardships he should have endured.

The world owes him so much love and warmth, so Su Yan wants to compensate him.

He told himself over and over again that this was what he deserved.

But thinking about it now, no one owes him at all, and even the world doesn't really owe him.

Every life is just a staggering walk through the world.

What kind of traces you want to leave behind, bright or dim, is your own business after all.

"Whale Talk" by Su Yan

Su Yan remembered that since he was very young, he would get up at six o'clock every day, stand outside the door of his father Su Mo's room, and recite the newspaper headlines of the day.

When the sky breaks, the corridor is always overcast.

He slowly read word by word, and if there was something he didn't know, he couldn't help clenching the newspaper with his fingers nervously.

My father is very strict. He usually looks calm, but when he turns his face, it is like a thunderclap on the ground without warning.

When Su Yan was six years old, because he was addicted to playing Lego, he woke up late the next day and was beaten by his father that day.

He wanted to explain, but as soon as he opened his mouth, he slapped him down the face, and then spoke again, and slapped his face again.

It wasn't until he closed his mouth and lowered his head quietly that his father said coldly, "You are so disappointing."

In the old family, everyone was afraid of disappointing their father.

Since then, he has been very disciplined.

Perhaps because of this, he can read very quickly.

Father's study was locked, and he had no spare books to read, so he secretly brought newspapers back to his room every day.

He likes to read social anecdotes the most, because he finds them new and interesting.

There are so many strange things in this world.

A husband ran away from home for ten years, only to find out that he had been quietly living in an alley across the street.

There are also vulgar and bloody news. The tofu pieces are generally cobbled together in the forum, and they talk about cheating, love murder, or a teacher who fell in love with a student and was expelled.

Another time, there was a story in the newspaper about a whale named Alice.

In 1992, Alice appeared in the waters off Whidbey Island, and the frequency of her sound was 52Hz.

The sound frequency of ordinary blue whales is 15-20Hz. No one has ever recorded a whale song at this frequency before.

Alice is the only whale in the world, it swims in the deep and boundless sea, alone, singing alone, even its kind can't understand its words. Maybe it spends its whole life looking for the other half who can understand itself, but it may never have any response.

It is the loneliest whale in the world.

This story has a strange appeal, and Su Yan cut it out and carefully collected it.

That move seemed a bit meaningless, but when he was spending a long and depressing teenage life abroad, would Su Yan still think of the whale named Alice?

It's amazing that it was just a year before the movie "Whale Whisper" was released.

A research institute searched the Pacific Ocean for a whale signal with a sound frequency similar to Alice's.

Alice might actually have a companion.

Twenty years have passed.

The lonely whale in his childhood suddenly had a different possibility, and the adult Su Yan felt a childlike impulse surging in his body.

He quickly hired a professional marine operation team of dozens of people, and took advantage of some spare time that year to follow the research team's ship from a distance, cruising the vast sea of ​​the Pacific Ocean for more than a month.

He wanted to find Alice's companion, and even after twenty years, he was extremely eager to know if there really was a companion of that whale in this world.

During that time, a man named Zhou Yun beside him was pestering him to come, and he agreed.

Zhou Yun was very attractive to him. He was beautiful, he was a mixed race, and his voice was beautiful.

Su Yan's vision of choosing a bed partner adheres to the principle of pragmatism. He must be fair-skinned, buttocks, obedient and patient. Apart from these functional characteristics, he doesn't care much about temperament and personality.

The days of searching in the vast sea are actually very boring.

Sometimes Su Yan stared at the calm sea, and at first glance it was a day.

In the daytime, the sea surface is clear greenish light blue, and after night falls, it gradually transitions from light to dark blue, and finally completely merges with the night into a dark blue as thick as ink.

There is always a salty smell in the wind.

After taking Zhou Yan on the boat, the young boy quickly felt bored. He had a little seasickness, but he didn't tell Su Yan secretly.

When Zhou Yun felt uncomfortable, Su Yan carried the boy to the sofa bed on the stern deck to blow air, and then gently massaged Zhou Yun's temples with peppermint oil.

Zhou Yun huddled in Su Yan's arms, and Su Yan slowly told him Alice's story and the meaning of his search on the sea.

Under the boundless starry sky, there is only the sound of waves between heaven and earth, and the two of them are whispering.

Zhou Yun looked at Su Yan, with a hint of resentment because of his uncomfortable expression: "Animals are not like people, so it's okay if they can't communicate and think about it carefully. Besides, even people are dumb, but it's not like that. Don't be surprised."

Su Yan didn't say anything, just smiled calmly: "Go to sleep."

He was not angry with Zhou Yun, but suddenly felt bored.

That kind of boring, but also seems to be expected.

Su Yan has always been called a man who loves his little 0 very much.

But the strange thing is that he rarely seems to really feel distressed or love this kind of emotion.

Many times taking care of the people around you, the meaning is like... He is a human, and the other party is also a human, so naturally a little humanitarian care is born.

Very shallow and hollow.

It was a weird feeling, like a glass cover from everyone around.

He never wanted to touch a person more deeply.

Sometimes, he feels like Alice in the deep sea, he has his own 52Hz.

A month later, he and the previous research team still hadn't tracked the whale that uttered the same-frequency whale song, and his work couldn't be delayed any longer, so he had no choice but to return home.

On the day of his departure, Su Yan stood alone on the side of the ship, watching the magnificent orange-red sunset slowly sink into the sea.

What a nice view……

Su Yan suddenly thought.

Maybe that whale just didn't like the hustle and bustle of the sea.

At this time, it may be in the ocean trench, dancing with the afterglow left by the setting sun in the waves.

In "American Beauty", the boy stared at the plastic bag tumbling in the autumn wind, with tears in his eyes and said: Sometimes there is too much beauty in this world...I can't seem to bear it. My heart... almost broke.

Maybe that moment was just that moment.

Su Yan recalled the English line with some trembling: "Sometimes there is so much beauty in the world. I feel like....I can't take it. And my heart....is just going to cave in ."

...

After returning to H City, Su Yan bought Zhou Yun the sports car the boy had always wanted, but the contact gradually faded away.

Zhou Yunlai made trouble several times. Su Yan asked the secretary to prepare three cheques, one at a time, and on the fourth time, he would rush people directly.

After that, never heard from Zhou Yun again.

He was less obsessed with searching for the whale's whereabouts, but he still donated a lot of money to the marine animal research team.

The people over there asked him if he would consider naming the second 52Hz whale after he found the whereabouts of the second whale. Su Yan thought about it, but rejected the suggestion.

He originally thought that his obsession with finding whales in his life had already ended.

But the next year, Xia Tingwan's "Whale Talk" was released.

After Su Yan saw it at the Cannes Film Festival, it was like falling into a magnificent dream since then.

Before the Blu-ray disc came out, he had to go to various film festivals in his spare time, just to see Xiao Xia on the big screen one more time.

A critic wrote:

Xia Tingwan is a beautiful color from the deep sea. His looming vulnerability, gloomy and faintly longing look will break the hearts of audiences in any country.

Yes, Su Yan understood the feeling the first time he saw Xia Tingwan.

He seemed to have returned to that distant evening in the sunset glow of the Pacific Ocean.

He couldn't bear the beauty that almost broke his heart.

For a man of his rank, such a situation was very dangerous, and he should have avoided it on purpose.

But he still didn't.

He knew that he should be an absolute outlier in his class.

What he pursued in his life, even he could not explain clearly, and others were not destined to understand.

...

On the night they got married, Su Yan took possession of Xia Tingwan fiercely.

This is the first time to do this stage, it should be gentle.

But Su Yan couldn't control himself no matter what, and pressed Xia Tingwan under his body to repeatedly invade, and then pressed Xia Tingwan fiercely, making him kneel on the bed and raise his hips.

He rides on Xia Tingwan, and the boy's slender neck can be closed with only one palm.

He held Xia Tingwan's throat like that, forcing Xia Tingwan to stand up and turn to look at him.

Xia Tingwan's tears fell down in a rustling manner, like a rose quivering in the wind with crystal dewdrops in the early morning.

He lowered his head and kissed Xia Tingwan, and whispered, "I love you."

Xia Tingwan turned her head stubbornly, but closed her eyes and sobbed and moaned.

It was the first time in his life that he said these three words.

Since then, his love has opened a tsunami-like valve.

In five years, he couldn't remember how many times he said I love you to Xia Tingwan.

Xia Tingwan rarely responded. Perhaps, if he remembered correctly, Xia Tingwan never seriously said the same three words to him.

...

Su Yan puts a freshly picked rose next to Xia Ting's bed every morning. Xia Ting may still be vaguely angry with him at the beginning of the evening, and asks a bit tactfully, "Why is there only one rose at a time, so stingy."

Su Yan took Xia Tingwan's hand and led him downstairs, showed him the rose garden he had planted, and said earnestly, "Because it was planted and cut by hand, there are not many."

Xia Tingwan looked at the roses blooming in the sun, her face turned slightly red, and asked, "Did you really plant them?"

Su Yan nodded. He told Xia Tingwan the story of "The Little Prince", saying that it was his favorite book when he was a child.

Xia Tingwan had never read that book before, listening to Su Yan talking about the little prince in it, about roses, and about the little prince's fox, he listened with great interest. He didn't say anything, but he secretly took the "Little Prince" from Su Yan's study. After reading it, he kept it on the bedside table on his side. Didn't put it back in the library.

The days of living with Xia Tingwan brought great happiness to Su Yan.

Xia Tingwan is willful, but also vivid. His every move was extremely cute in Su Yan's eyes.

During that time, as he got older, he burst out with an unprecedented desire to create. He sent 138 love letters to Xia Tingwan, but in fact, he wrote and secretly wrote more than this number.

Many, many nasty words, he actually buried in the bottom of his heart.

But in fact, the ones that were sent out looked very hypocritical in retrospect, but what else could be done.

Maybe that's what it's like to be married to a loved one.

From then on, life has a smart look, and its trend is romantic and full, like taking a bite of a full cake and falling into the belly, it is sweet and satisfying.

They went to watch old movies in 1998 together, and then held hands on the street, chatting about plots and characters.

When no one is around, they are more brazenly intimate. In summer, they lie naked in the jacuzzi on the balcony, Xia Ting sits between Su Yan's lap in the evening, and people lean on Su Yan's arms and look up at the starry sky. He peeled the oranges and fed them petal by petal.

He also went out to eat mutton hot pot in the middle of the winter in the middle of the winter. Xia Ting was afraid of the cold in the evening, so Su Yan bought him an off-white rabbit fur ear bag to wear, which was as cute as a little rabbit.

Once photographed, Su Yan saw two reporters shivering in the cold wind, and invited them to have a hot pot at the next table.

Xia Tingwan ignored Su Yan unhappily, and Su Yan was not in a hurry, so he slowly cooked the mutton for Xia Tingwan and sandwiched it piece by piece.

Xia Ting ate for a while, suddenly couldn't help laughing again, looked at Su Yan and said softly, "Su Yan, you have such a good temper."

He does have a good temper, and most of the time, he is gentle.

But Su Yan knew that in his heart, there was always another completely different self——

The morbid self who wants to completely occupy Xia Tingwan all the time.

Perhaps in those five years, to a certain extent, he still felt that he was a suitor, and even after thousands of hugs, he still felt unsatisfied.

He wanted every inch of Xia Tingwan's skin to belong to him. Sometimes, he just wanted to swallow it one bite at a time to feel safe.

He had to suppress it all the time, only occasionally revealing a little bit on the bed.

Almost every time Xia Tingwan played with him, she would cry pitifully in the end. When she was on the bed, the beautiful little peacock was not his opponent at all. Every time, she would completely disarm and surrender.

He liked Xia Tingwan's surrender, laying down under him, and pleading with a whimper: "No, really no."

Xia Tingwan is the most aggrieved person in the world, when a pair of peach blossoms looked over with hazy eyes.

You know his grievance, and you also know that this grievance is a little spoiled. He is not so uncomfortable, just wants you to love him more.

He leaned down, put Xia Tingwan in his arms, and called out baby and coax, but he couldn't help but lowered his head and bit his earlobe like a white shell, and asked in a low voice, "Little peacock, you know what? Do you—you belong to me."

Xia Ting would fight back from time to time in the evening. Sometimes he would ask this question, but he would not say it.

Su Yan couldn't tolerate Xia Tingwan's disobedience at this time. He pressed Xia Tingwan under his body, threateningly bit Xia Tingwan's fragile Adam's apple with his teeth, and waited patiently.

Until Xia Tingwan pushed him with a crying voice, took his hand and touched the jade ring between his fingers: "I'm yours, I'm yours."

Su Yan sometimes thinks that he is really not that gentle.

In his heart, there seems to be a dragon hidden——

Just like in fairy tales, I like bright things, so I snatch gold and silver treasures back and hide them in my cave.

He, too, wanted to take his little prince to a high cliff, shut him up in his lair, and then entrenched in the entrance. He would not allow anyone to come in or out, not allow anyone to hurt him, and would not allow anyone to see the beauty inside.

His love is far from so great and peaceful.

Rather, it is narrow, crazy, and seems to want to accumulate all life at a point-like extreme.

But at that time, what he never thought was that if one day the evil dragon became old, who would be able to guard the cave where the treasures were hidden, and who would bring the little prince down from the cliff.

...

After the divorce, Su Yan repeatedly dreamed of the night they got married.

Late that night, Xia Tingwan was so tormented that she lost her strength, lying on the big bed and breathing lightly.

Su Yan went to pour him a glass of red wine, and when he walked back to the room, Xia Ting was lying on his side with his back to him, his slender legs curled up between the quilts, revealing only his naked upper body.

He has two beautiful butterfly bones, and when he moves slightly, the light and shadow are like dancing on his skin.

Dark blue sheets and dark blue fluffy quilt hug Xia Ting Wan as tenderly as ocean waves.

The silver moonlight shone down on the boy's white back.

Xia Ting turned his head back late, showing a half-sweet profile, and said softly, "You're back."

Su Yan held his breath.

At that moment, he seemed to see the deep sea in the night, and the lazy waves and the wind slapped the cliffs together.

Under the moonlight, a small white whale jumped up on the sea playfully, revealing a flexible dorsal fin.

He suddenly realized.

Then he called the research team, and he said, he changed his mind—

If you can still find traces of the whale, maybe consider calling it TW.

"TW, my court evening.

My beautiful little whale, the only 52Hz in this world."