This page looks best with JavaScript enabled
Chapter 44 I won't take revenge on him again
Chapter 44 I won't take revenge on him again
Is Yan Shanhua dying?
This day came earlier than expected. I thought I would feel relieved and happy because of the news of her death, but I don't know if it was because I took too many sedative medicines. When I heard the news, I didn't feel happy, and I didn't feel any pain or regret, just... very calm. .
After Ayao left, I lay on the sofa, looking at the ceiling above my head, and fell into a state of emptiness.
I recently discovered a great way to regulate my emotions by myself, which I call the "ostrich method" - don't want to see the sun, just bury your head in the sand. If you don't want to worry, then it's better not to think about the troubles.
Thinking only about survival, sleeping, eating, going to the bathroom, like an old computer, executing one instruction at a time. And those problems that cannot be changed in the short term, don't touch them, don't think about them. As long as they are locked in the memory corner and forcibly forgotten, the body will become much easier.
"Meow~" The little white cat woke up, jumped on top of me, raised a lazy waist, and began to rub my face with its furry head.
Overwhelmed, I had to withdraw my mind and focus on it.
Cats are so annoying, more annoying than turtles.
"Did you miss Ji Chenfeng?" I said, rubbing the kitten's head, "In two days, if he doesn't come back, let's go find him."
On the sixth day, my bank card received the money from Ji Chenfeng, no more or no less, 500,000.
I sat up from the sofa at once, staring at the string of dazzling numbers in disbelief.
Even if Yan Shanhua was dying and no longer needed money for medical treatment, Ji Chenfeng returned the 300,000 yuan he asked me back to me as it was, and who gave him the remaining 200,000 yuan? Where did he get so much money?
And what does he mean? Give me back the money, don't owe me any more, are you planning to settle with me... from now on?
He paced back and forth in the living room restlessly, unable to come up with an answer, and no one to ask.
How to do?
How to do……
Teeth clenched my index knuckles and I needed to do something to distract myself.
Whenever there is an unsolved problem in the mind, the strength between the teeth will increase. The pain stopped my brain from focusing on Ji Chenfeng's problems with all my strength, and allowed me to calm down a little bit.
Yan Shanhua was going to die, Ji Chenfeng returned the money to me and wanted to clear it up with me... He wanted to clear it from me...
I stopped, as if grabbing a ray of light from the ignorant darkness, and the whole world gradually became brighter.
Wait, isn't that what I want? After Yan Shanhua died, I was the only one who knew the secret. Ji Chenfeng was no longer a threat. Wouldn't it be just right for him and me to clear things up?
I'm confused. This is the development that echoes my expectations, isn't it? God, this is helping me, what am I in a hurry?
After I figured it out, I took the red and swollen knuckles out of my mouth and sat back on the sofa.
Finally this is all over. My life is about to return to the right track, without Yan Shanhua, without Ji Chenfeng, without any poverty and shabby things.
I will become the real "Prince" and take charge of the Sang family's industry.
And here...
I looked around and glanced at the messy living room and the takeaway boxes piled up on the coffee table.
No matter how it looks like, it can't be real. This is not "home", not my home, just an illusory illusion like the Xu family and Sang Zhengbai gave me. I will get out of here and discard this place, along with the memories of Ji Chenfeng.
After all, it is the woman who gave birth to me, and I don't want to admit it, but Yan Shanhua's genes are always flowing in my body. And she did keep her promise with me and didn't reveal the truth of the year to anyone.
Now that she's going to die, all the grievances are gone, not for love but for reason, I should go to see her for the last time, just... settle my fate with her.
On the seventh day of the new year, I took good care of myself. Shaved, waxed his head, meticulously put on his shirt, vest, suit pants, and finally put on a woolen coat and went out.
The hospital where Yan Shanhua works is not far from the City of Flies, and it is only twenty minutes away from where I live.
I bought a bunch of carnations at the entrance of the hospital. According to the hospitalization information that A Yao gave me, through the guidance of the security guard, I went all the way around, and finally found a low building surrounded by gardens in a remote corner of the hospital.
In the palliative care department, I looked up at the sign above my head, and I stepped into the depths of the corridor.
At the end of the corridor is Yan Shanhua's ward.
There are two beds in the house, but the other one is covered with plastic film, and no one sleeps for the time being. Maybe in two days, Yan Shanhua's bed will be vacant, just like this one...
Looking back, I randomly placed the flowers in my hand on the cabinet beside Yan Shanhua's bed. The woman who was in a drowsiness woke up when she heard the movement. After finding out that it was me, her eyes widened, showing a surprised and happy expression.
She looked worse than the last time saw her. He was as thin as a handful of bones, his cheeks were sunken, his cheekbones were high, and his eyes were terrifyingly large.
"Xiao Nian..." She sat up with difficulty and stretched out her hands towards me, "Am I dreaming?"
I glanced at her skinny palms and sat down on the escort chair with my back to the door, ignoring her intentions.
"Isn't it effective for such an expensive medicine?"
Yan Shanhua's eyes dimmed a little, he withdrew his hand, and said with a shy smile: "The medicine is a good medicine, but I didn't take it myself. It doesn't make sense for me to live two more years. It's better to die early."
I was startled: "Have you stopped taking the medicine yourself?"
The ward was a little hot, and I took off the gloves I was wearing. The purple-red tooth marks on my knuckles were shocking. I glanced at it, and put the leather gloves on top to cover it up a little.
"If I live one more day, I will drag the morning wind one more day." Yan Shanhua stared at the snow-white quilt in front of him, like a withered mummy, "I know that he asked you to borrow the money for my medical treatment, and he didn't say anything. , I know. He didn't want me to die, he tried his best to prolong my life, and took me to see a doctor everywhere. I really felt sorry for him. I actually didn't want to live for a long time, but I was afraid that he would be sad, so I promised him that he would take good treatment. He doesn't know, this is my retribution, I deserve it."
It's ironic, Ji Chenfeng wanted her to live so much, but she just wanted to die.
"You really deserve it," I said.
Yan Shanhua's body trembled and his head dropped even lower.
"I'm sorry for you, I'm sorry for Chenfeng, I'm sorry for Mrs. Sang and Mr. Sang..." She covered her face and wept bitterly, "When your father lay in the hospital with serious injuries, I don't know if he can wake up in this life. I was frightened that you were born early, you were small and weak when you were born, I cried all day and all day, I don't understand how this kind of thing could be bumped into by our family."
"It's so pitiful that you invested in our family. We can't give you anything. At that time, my mind was broken, and I kept thinking about these things. When I saw that the Sang family was so rich, I had thoughts that I shouldn't have. She suddenly got excited, slapped her face with a slap, "I killed you and Morrowind, I killed you and Morrowind!"
Although she was terminally ill, her strength was not small, and her face became red and swollen after a while.
I frowned and said solemnly, "Okay..."
Going crazy in front of me, I have done everything, is it useful to say this now? Who wants to listen to what she has to do?
Yan Shanhua's thrashing movement stopped, but the next second he struggled to get out of bed and knelt in front of me.
"What are you doing?" I got up in a panic, causing the escort chair to come off the ground with a harsh sound.
"Xiao Nian, when I swapped you with Chenfeng, it was my fault, it was my mother's fault, it was all my fault." She grabbed the corner of my clothes and choked up, "Mom is going to die, all the I will bear all the hatred. Don't blame Morrowind, just let him go... let him go..."
He took a step back involuntarily and was held back by the chair behind him.
There is no going back. Obviously it's just an ordinary chair, just kick it away, but I seem to have nowhere to go.
Staring at Yan Shanhua in front of her, her eyes went from her tear-stained face to the hands that were tugging at the hem of my clothes.
As she said, all the sins and all the hatred are borne by her, and when she dies, these things are also taken away by her, and everything ends with her.
After stepping out here, don't contact Ji Chenfeng again. It's the best arrangement to cut him out of your life. But why... why am I so unwilling?
Just by nodding, you can have nothing to do with Ji Chenfeng, but the spine is stiff and cannot be bent, and the tongue is numb to the whole mouth.
Because there is no decent breakup?
Yes. How could it end so inexplicably? After all, it's a lover that I confessed to myself. Even if it ends, it's up to me to make it clear to my face.
It's me who broke up, I don't want him. This must be clear and must not be fooled.
"You're going to die, and you still think about him." I pulled out the hem of my coat a little bit, I helped Yan Shanhua up from the ground, and said indifferently, "Don't worry, as long as I can inherit everything from the Sang family, I will be pestered. What does he do? I'm not really in love with him..."
Yan Shanhua was calmed down by me for a while, stood up tremblingly, and asked, "...Really?"
I don't know which sentence she asked, is it that I won't pester Ji Chenfeng anymore, or that I don't really like him?
Forget it, it doesn't matter. It's the same anyway.
I helped her to the bed, tidied her withered hair, and took out another tissue to wipe away the tears on her face.
"Really." I paused and said, "I won't take revenge on him again."
She was relieved, maybe she was tired from crying, consumed a small amount of energy, and fell asleep after a while.
Crumple up the paper towel and throw it in the trash. I dragged the escort chair and sat in the ward for almost half an hour before I got up and put on my gloves and walked out the door.
Pushing open the door of the ward, he should have strode away without caring, but when the corner of his eye glanced at the figure leaning against the door, he froze in place.
A few seconds later, I recovered my wandering soul, and looked at Ji Chenfeng, who had been standing there for some time with a fluke.
Just like on New Year's Eve, he put his hands in the pockets of his down jacket and leaned against the wall quietly. I didn't look up until I found him.
I took a staggered step back as a blurry shadow flashed across my eyes. If on New Year's Eve, the eyes he looked at me were the rain of early autumn, although it was cool, but the warmth was still there, then the eyes he looked at me now were the strongest and deadliest ice cone on the glacier, with only the sharp coldness left. .
All the luck was gone in the eyes he looked at me.
He heard it.
Yan Shanhua and I just heard the conversation.
I am done.