Chapter 51

Before the life experience was exposed, I was always worried about this, worrying about that, worrying that I was in a panic all day long.

Sang Zhengbai didn't take revenge on me furiously, Xu Xi didn't look down on me, Tang Bi'an didn't call me "young master" anymore, but he called me "brother" more often than before.

I used to think that if I was no longer "Sang Nian", I would become nothing. Of course, what I should be afraid of is "having nothing", in terms of money, rights, and quality of life.

Actually not.

What I am afraid of is that the only thing I can hold in my hand will no longer belong to me in the end - Sang Zhengbai's approval, the respect of the world, the care of my relatives, and the sight that will stay on me forever.

Obviously already got it, recognition, respect, love, attention... I got everything from Ji Chenfeng alone, but I turned a blind eye and stepped on the other person's precious sincerity into the mud.

I abandoned him, pushed him away, hurt him, and did so many wrong things, and now I am alienated, hated, and ignored by the other side, which is only natural.

However, if you think about it this way, it is not easy to accept all this calmly.

"Do you feel heartache?"

"Well, it hurts when he doesn't look at me."

"Have you never felt this way before?"

"You mean the previous love? No, no one has ever made me feel this way." I pressed my heart and pondered for a moment, "When he showed me a disgusting expression, his heart was crushed into the glass. Like scum, even breathing will cause severe pain."

Tang Bian held a bag of giant potato chips and sighed sadly when he heard the words: "Then you're pretty lucky, you just met such a person now. Every time I get rejected by a girl I like, my heart hurts so much that I can't breathe. "

He grabbed the tissue on the coffee table and threw it over. It hit Tang Bi'an's nose. Although it didn't hurt, he was still startled, and the potato chips in his hand shattered.

"Why..." Tang Bian put the tissue back on the coffee table and touched the tip of his nose aggrieved.

"Can this be called life?" I glared at him.

"Then I say you're unlucky and you'll get angry too..." Tang Bian muttered while picking up the potato chips from himself and stuffing it into his mouth.

"I'm here to find a solution for you, not to complain about me."

I began to think about the correctness of this decision. Perhaps it is more reliable than Tang Bi'an to walk into a temple and draw a lottery to find the answer.

"I'm thinking about it..." Tang Bian got up from the sofa with the potato chips in his arms, walked slowly to the window, looked at the scenery downstairs, and then walked to the cabinet with the glass jar and admired it for a while. The little king who rests quietly.

The potato chips were stuffed into the mouth at a constant speed, and the chirp did not stop from beginning to end.

"I figured it out, brother!" Just when I was about to get impatient, he stopped eating, as if he had come up with a brilliant idea, and looked back at me happily, "Why don't you learn sign language? He can't hear, But you can see it."

Learn sign language?

In A Yao's investigation report, read that Ji Chenfeng can sign language, but...

"...Have you ever thought that he will close his eyes?" And does sign language mean that you can learn it if you learn it? By the time I learn to communicate freely, Ji Chenfeng may not have been living with Jian Xing long ago.

"Ah..." Tang Bian's smile froze on his face, biting the potato chips and embarrassingly said, "Let me think about it."

After returning from Tang Bi'an's house without success, it was late at night when he returned to the rental house.

Standing at the door, facing the living room under the warm light, some do not want to go in.

The space is clearly not big, but for some reason, it is so quiet that it makes people feel very empty. Time seems to have become gelatinous, the air has become sticky, and only faint sounds can be heard in the ears.

On the sofa, by the dining table, by the pool...there are Ji Chenfeng's shadows everywhere.

Before, I would regard these as torture, resenting the pain I suffered. Now, I already know that this is the most common and common emotion of human beings - missing.

I can't see him, so want to see him. want to see him, so he is everywhere.

"Missing" is not dangerous, nor will it hurt me, but it will be a little bitter and painful...

Finally stepping through the door, I exhaled a long breath, walked to the window and opened it to let in the outside noise. In an instant, the sound of the leaves, the sound of the wind, and the sound of the road in the distance, noisyly mixed together and poured into the ear canal.

...and a little lonely. Looking at the rich night outside the house, I added another sentence in my heart.

Although Tang Bian is unreliable, I'm at a loss as to "how to approach him without annoying Ji Chenfeng", so I can only try this dog-headed military strategist for the time being.

After groping, signed up for a volunteer sign language training class, which starts from 7:00 pm to 9:00 pm every Wednesday and Saturday at the cultural activity center next to a library.

The library is right at the subway entrance, only five stops from where I live.

The anti-anxiety drugs I take have the effect of impairing concentration and responsiveness, so there are precautions against driving and operating dangerous equipment during treatment. In addition, I am sitting on the mountain after all, and I can save if I can. Since I have become an ordinary person, I must have the consciousness of being an ordinary person.

So at 6:30 p.m. on Wednesday night, I got on the subway after a long absence.

What never expected was that at 6:30, it was the evening rush hour, so had to queue up to get into the carriage, and finally squeezed in, and had to stick to the flesh with strangers.

Perfume, sweat, and food all mixed together to create an unbearable stench.

I frowned tightly and covered my nose and mouth with a tissue, I couldn't help but want to vomit on the dead fat man whose legs were shaking constantly in front of me.

Not to mention that one person occupies two positions, and she keeps shaking her legs like Parkinson. Didn't you see that the girl next to you has been squeezed to the edge by you, and even her shoulders are shrunk?

The dead fat man still smells sour. How many days has he not taken a bath?

"Guck!" I pulled the ring, covered my mouth and leaned forward, looking like I was retching.

Fatty was startled, raised his head from the phone, and his legs stopped shaking immediately.

"Wow what are you doing?"

I removed the tissue and retched more violently, as if I was going to throw up on him with the overnight meal in the next second.

The fat man raised his legs side by side and moved a few centimeters to the side in horror, which soon attracted the dissatisfaction of others.

"Stop squeezing, squeeze to death!"

"It's not that I want to squeeze, there is someone here who is going to vomit..." The fat man yelled at me with a face full of displeasure, "I have to vomit and vomit!"

I really couldn't stand the smell on his body, so I covered my mouth and nose again, stared at him and said coldly, "Can you fucking control it?"

Being attacked by me, Fatty's face quickly turned from blue to white, and his voice was immediately silenced. Quickly stuffing the phone into his backpack, he whispered something and pushed me towards the door, not knowing if he was about to get out of the car or if he was simply scared and ran away.

The fat man's seat was vacated, and the girl on the side sighed in relief, finally being able to sit upright normally. A few passengers around looked at the seat and then looked at me, but no one dared to sit.

"Sit down." I raised my chin towards a middle-aged woman who looked a little older.

She was stunned: "Oh, okay, thank you." Then she sat down obediently.

The library station seemed to be a big station, and as it approached the station, many people stood up, including the girl who had been squeezed earlier.

I followed the flow of people to the door effortlessly.

"thanks……"

Hearing the soft, mosquito-like sound of thanks, I turned my head to look, it was the girl.

I wanted to tell her if she was uncomfortable next time, and I inadvertently caught a glimpse of a familiar figure in the crowd of people who kept leaving the platform at the end of her eyes.

In an instant, my attention was attracted by the figure that was very similar to Ji Chenfeng. I tried my best to squeeze out, ignoring the cursing in my ears and the crumpled clothes. I just wanted to hurry up and hurry up. The opponent ran away.

However, the flow of people during the evening peak was beyond my imagination, and in the blink of an eye, I lost the whereabouts of that person.

I looked in every direction, and I also looked for nearby stores. The figure that was so close just now seems to be an illusion of me alone.

Maybe it's just a body image, maybe it's not Ji Chenfeng at all. His home and work are not here, why are you running here?

And what if it were him? Hold him and tell him that we are destined by fate, we can meet you anywhere?

He just suspects that I'm following him.

I sat on the side of the road for a while with a bit of disappointment, remembering that when I came to take a sign language class, it was almost time for the class to start.

He hurried into the activity center and, guided by the poster, successfully found the only open classroom on the second floor.

"Mr. Ji, I'll ask you to worry more in the future."

"Teacher, how long does it take to communicate without hindrance?"

"Has Mr. Ji ever been in contact with hearing-impaired children? Will they be willing to communicate with us?"

Before entering the classroom, I heard the voices of several people inside. The teacher seemed to have arrived and finished introducing himself.

It's not bad to be late on the first day, Sang Nian.

Closing my eyes, I stepped into the classroom and said to the seven or eight people surrounding the podium, "I'm sorry, I'm late..."

Everyone turned their heads to look at me, and just like that, a clear and straight path was made between me and Ji Chenfeng.

I looked at him stunned, and he looked at me stunned.

How can you say that? The crowd searched for him thousands of times, and when looked back, the man was in the dim light.

I've been looking for him for so long, and he's here waiting for me. This is not called destiny, what is meant by destiny?

"Sorry, I'm late." I walked up to him and stretched out my hand, "My name is Sang Nian, where's the teacher?"

The smile on his lips faded a bit. Ji Chenfeng seemed to have a lot to say to me, but because of the crowd, he finally compromised and shook my hand meaningfully.

"My name is Ji."

It might only be two seconds, before he could even feel the temperature in his palm, he quickly withdrew his hand as if he was afraid of being cut by a sharp weapon hidden in my hand.

"Okay, let's all sit down, the class is about to start." He stopped looking at me and motioned for everyone to find a seat and sit down.

The people around dispersed one by one and left the podium, but I didn't move.

I am still immersed in this wonderful fate with Ji Chenfeng.

"Mr. Ji..." It's just three syllables, but it seems to have gone through hundreds of turns on the tip of the tongue. Every ending sound sticks to the next word. At the last sound, there is no word sticker, and it can only disappear. in a smile.

Ji Chenfeng glanced at me, leaned over slightly, and said in a voice that only each other could hear: "Go out if you don't sit down, and don't disturb others in class."

"Okay." I replied with a smile, not at all angry.

Seeing him was the biggest surprise of the night. Before the surprise was exhausted, my mood was full of joy.

Turning around and walking off the podium, the students I had completely ignored gradually began to have faces, and unexpectedly found a familiar girl among them.

When the young girl in the orange dress saw that I noticed her, she waved to me quietly.

There were two seats in a row, and the seat beside her was still empty. This was the only seat left facing the podium, where I could see Ji Chenfeng, and was close enough to him. I walked over subconsciously.

Seeing that I was going to sit next to her, she hurriedly took the cloth bag from the other seat.

"What a coincidence." As soon as I sat down, she lowered her voice and said, "Thank you on the subway just now. My name is Meng Xueyan, you can just call me Xiaoxue."

Doesn't this bump into our cat's name?

"Just call me Sang Nian," I said.

Meng Xueyan choked, and just as she was about to say something else, there was a knocking sound that was enough to attract attention from the podium.

Meng Xueyan and I looked over together, and saw Ji Chenfeng tap on the whiteboard with a marker, his eyes swept across Meng Xueyan, and finally landed on my face.

"Quiet." Ji Chenfeng spit out two words clearly and powerfully.