Chapter 76

After got sick last time, it took me more than half a year to maintain a good complexion, but this time it was completely gone.

Even if he didn't speak, Chu Yan could feel his current mood. He couldn't help sighing and said to Shen Muchuan, "Is it night now? If you're sleepy, go to bed. You don't need to accompany me."

Shen Muchuan stood up slightly, raised the pillow for him, and said softly, "It's just dark."

"I just finished sleeping, and I'm not sleepy... How about you, you've slept for a day, how are you feeling now?"

Chu Yan's eyes fell in the direction he was speaking, and he blinked, and seemed to be struggling to speak: "It's okay, I just feel a little tired..."

Shen Muchuan's heart was heavy, as if a drop of thick ink fell into the clear water and quickly fainted. Before, he was afraid that he would worry, and if there was any discomfort, he just endured it... He said this now, but it's far more than that. .

"If you're tired, sleep for a while, and I'll call you later..."

But Chu Yan shook his head: "I don't sleep anymore, I've been sleeping for a long time, I just want to hear what you have to say."

Shen Muchuan kept looking at him without even blinking. Hearing what he said, he nodded and said, "Okay."

"Then...what do you want to hear?"

"It's okay, just... tell me what you want to do in the future..."

after……

Shen Muchuan didn't dare to think about these two words, and he couldn't imagine what it would be like if he was the only one left for the rest of his life.

Shen Muchuan didn't want to let his emotions affect him, and said in a relaxed tone, "I can't tell... I'm very tacky, I just want to make more money while I'm young, otherwise when I get old, I can only let you follow me. I drink the northwest wind."

"If you really ask me what I want to do, I don't know."

But after he finished speaking, he found that Chu Yan was looking in his direction, and under the white light above his head, there seemed to be fine water lights floating in his eyes.

Seeing his sad expression, Shen Muchuan trembled in his heart, and said at a loss, "What's wrong? Is there any discomfort?"

Chu Yan was only silent, shook his head slowly, and the hot water slid down from the corner of his eyes, and then he said in a harsh voice, "I'm sorry..."

Shen Muchuan had never seen him cry, even if his eyes were out of sight, even if he suffered from illness, he always accepted it calmly, never like this before.

"Why do you say sorry?" Shen Muchuan wiped his tears for him in a hurry, but said helplessly and distressedly, "Why do you always like to say sorry to me... Don't say it again in the future, okay?"

Chu Yan closed his eyes and sighed softly, "Okay."

...

After the condition deteriorated completely, the hospital instead transferred Chu Yan to the general ward. Even though he had been prepared for all this, when the footsteps of death approached, Shen Muchuan truly felt a sense of helplessness.

And Chu Yan was only in a drowsiness most of the time, sometimes Shen Muchuan was just talking to him, he was listening for one second, and the next second he would fall asleep unconsciously.

He didn't eat much, and he didn't have any appetite at all. Shen Muchuan knew that several times he just reluctantly ate it because he didn't want to worry about himself.

Seeing him lose weight day by day, all the food he ate was spit out, and he fell asleep, not sure if he would wake up the next day. This kind of torture like cutting flesh with a blunt knife almost made Shen Muchuan unable to endure it, but every time he just held Chu Yan's hand, he seemed to have infinite courage.

In the middle of the night, Shen Muchuan suddenly felt heart palpitations, and woke up from a misty dream in a cold sweat. He got up, looked at the sky outside, and found that it was still completely dark outside. The hospital ward was quiet, only the breeze was blowing. There was a slight noise from the lawn at the entrance of the hospital.

At this moment, a messy and hurried footsteps sounded in the corridor at the door of the ward. Shen Muchuan seemed to have foreseen something, and stood there for a while, before he remembered something and rushed out of the door.

But before he entered Chu Yan's ward, he saw doctors and nurses hurriedly pushing the bed out. Shen Muchuan subconsciously followed, but was blocked by a group of nurses and doctors until he saw someone being sent in. emergency room.

The nurse reached out to block him: "I'm sorry, family members, please wait outside."

Shen Muchuan stared at her for a while, before he seemed to understand her words and nodded: "Okay, then I'll wait for him outside..."

The little nurse looked at his pale face, sighed long, and then turned around and followed into the emergency room.

The lights in the corridor were dazzlingly bright, and Shen Muchuan leaned against the cold wall of the emergency room.

The nerves relax, the consciousness becomes dull and sticky, and the heartbeat becomes very slow at this time. In this silent night, every beat can be heard clearly.

As if vaguely, can also realize that something has quietly drawn a stop.

Finally, with a snap, the lights in the emergency room dimmed, and the sound echoed in the empty hallway.

The door was opened, and the doctor came out and took off his mask, and said to Shen Muchuan who was standing there dumbfounded, "The patient is still a little conscious, you can talk to him for a while."

At this moment, Shen Muchuan realized that he had a strange and icy calm instead. He nodded calmly, but because he hadn't opened his mouth for too long, he didn't even make a sound when he opened his mouth for the first time. His throat rolled up and down, and then again. He said again, "Okay."

His whole person's consciousness was already very weak, and all the medical equipment and respirator on his body were taken off, but after Shen Muchuan came in, his eyelids moved, and it took a while before he slowly opened his eyes.

"You came."

Shen Muchuan gave a soft "um", then sat down beside his bed, reaching out and holding his hand on the sheet.

"Don't be sad..." Chu Yan's fingers were slightly bent in the hand he held, as if he was comforting him silently.

Shen Muchuan looked at him and nodded heavily: "Okay, I'm not sad..."

Chu Yan smiled, and then said: "Actually, I have been very happy every day for the past two years... Although I can't see it, I think it is the most sober and happiest two years of my life... …”

"Me too, me too..." This sentence made Shen Muchuan cry, he thought he could hold back and let this person leave without worry.

Chu Yan struggled to raise his hand as if to touch his face, but Shen Muchuan immediately held it and pressed it against his cheek.

Chu Yan wiped his tears gently with the back of his hand, but the tears grew more and more, and finally he sighed and said softly, "I want to see you again..."

Shen Muchuan nodded with difficulty: "Okay..." Then he held his hand along his brow bone, eye socket, nose bridge, and lips all the way down.

"It's good..." After Chu Yan finished saying this, he slowly closed his eyes.

At the same time, the electrocardiogram device flickered, followed by a flat curve...

After the funeral, Shen Muchuan returned home. Since Chu Yan lost his sight, all unnecessary furniture in the house has not been left. The whole living room is empty, and when he walks over, there seems to be a cold echo.

He went to the kitchen to cook porridge by himself, Shen Muchuan filled two bowls, and sat at the dining table for a while, until the porridge was cold, then he turned around and went to the bedroom.

There were traces of Chu Yan's life everywhere, Shen Muchuan walked over, took off Chu Yan's coat from the hanger at the door, and hung it in the closet.

But as soon as the clothes were shaken off, a letter fell out of it. Shen Muchuan's heart trembled. He picked it up and was stunned for a while, but he never dared to open it.

Finally, he closed his eyes and opened them again, slowly opening the letter.

The handwriting is so clear that it does not look like it was written by a blind person, and even the spacing between each word is very neat...

"Mu Chuan, I hesitated for a long time, not sure if I want to tell you these words, but after thinking about it, I still want you to see it.

Speaking of which, I was too selfish to let you face all this alone again.

As early as two years ago, I knew that I might not be able to accompany you for the rest of my life... I have thought about it countless times, what would you do if you were alone after I left, but I couldn't think of it. But I originally thought that if I could go through the first year with you, there would be a second year, a third year, maybe even ten or twenty years.

Even greedy, I want to participate in the rest of your life every year, but I didn't expect this day to come so quickly.

I have a lot of words that I want to keep saying to you at the age of thirty, at the age of forty, at the age of fifty, at the age of sixty, at the age of seventy... I wonder if you will still think about it then Look……

What I was most afraid of was, if I left, would you really forget me. But later, I sincerely hope that you can forget me, and hope that you can live happily in my absence. "

After Shen Muchuan read the letter, he suddenly rushed over to open the drawers of the desk and the cabinet in the bedroom, and finally found a cardboard box under the bookshelf.

There are nearly a hundred letters in it, ranging from thirty to one hundred years old, every year on my birthday and every Spring Festival...

Shen Muchuan picked up the 30-year-old envelope from the box, and with a click, tears fell on the envelope, and the water droplets quickly stunned the black carbon ink.

Without you for the rest of my life, how can you let me go on alone.

Why can you be so cruel, you know I can't do it at all...

The author has something to say: The world is finally over.

This bento is really soulless, forgive me, TAT

Thank you to the little angel who voted for the king or irrigated the nutrient solution for me~

Thanks to the little angels who voted [Landmine]: Se-xi, sunshine, Xiaohei, Aruo, Jiang Cheng, Yulouxue, Juwu, Qianyu 1;

Thanks to the little angel who irrigated [nutrient solution]:

10 bottles of Gu Luo; 5 bottles of Year; 4 bottles of Kite; 2 bottles of Azure, Jin Jin; 1 bottle of Momo, Endless Life, and Li Fengzi;

Thank you very much for your support, I will continue to work hard!