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72 Chapter 008
translator: xiin
editors: butter & XavierForest
Song Yu took a deep breath. At the end of the day, his personality was already no longer as direct as it had been when he was a child. He calmed down his inner anger and panic, practically forcing his words out through gritted teeth, “Let go.”
Xie Sui laughed lightly and stepped back. He pressed a finger against the wall and turned on the light.
The oppression that had been suffocating Song Yu dispersed as he stepped away.
The ambiguous air that had seemed frozen solid began to flow again.
Xie Sui was standing straight inside the brightened living room. He appeared cool and elegant, and the ** and carelessness from before had been put away. “Sorry, that was my misunderstanding.”
Song Yu laughed out of anger. He bared his teeth, “Are you so casual with everyone?”
Xie Sui’s dark eyes steadily focused on him for a moment. He laughed a little, then suddenly changed the topic, “Would you like something to drink?”
Like hell did Song Yu want something to drink; he was stuffed full with anger. His expression was cold as he refused directly, “It’s not necessary. It’s not early anymore, I should head back.”
Xie Sui suddenly spoke up, “Song Yu.” He looked into his eyes and continued, “Stay, let’s chat.”
Song Yu’s words got caught in his throat. He raised his head, his light-brown eyes filled with surprise.
Xie Sui stopped briefly, then added another sentence. He said indifferently, “Other than you, I can’t find anyone else to talk to right now.”
His tone was understated, but it held an almost unnoticeable sense of loneliness.
Song Yu was stunned.
Yeah, despite the levity in his performance, the man in front of him wasn’t in an optimistic position. He was at a low point in life, and his relatives regarded him as a snake in their midst. He was alone in this city, surrounded by malice.
He then thought about what Xie Sui had done just now. He’d been so flippant—was he like that with everyone?
Song Yu stewed in his heart. His anger remained stuck there, and he felt that they really needed to have a good chat.
“Anything’s fine.” This could be considered his answer to the ‘what would you like to drink’ question from earlier.
He took off his suit jacket, draped it over his arm, and stepped further into the house.
There was a rainstorm in A City in the middle of the night. It rained heavily, and the boundless curtain of rain could be seen through the window, blurring the bustling city.
Song Yu frowned briefly after accepting a cup of steaming water and asked him, “Are you interested in working for the Song Family? I can contact my father and get you a position at headquarters. It can be overseas, and you can avoid the Xie Family.”
But Xie Sui only smiled briefly, “Thank you, but there’s no need to trouble yourself.”
Anger inexplicably sparked in Song Yu’s heart, “In that case, don’t be as casual as you were today. Aunt Xu wouldn’t want to see you fall to such a point.” He recalled the gossip that he’d heard and couldn’t bring himself to believe it, “You can’t have thought that I came to find you because I wanted to keep you, right?”
Xie Sui tilted his head and smiled, “Well, do you want to?”
Song Yu was very certain, “No!”
Xie Sui drew out his reply, “Oh.”
Although he’d been depressed by this misunderstanding, he would still visit Xie Sui from time to time due to some complex emotion. In fact, after they’d separated as children, their first reunion after many years hadn’t been anything warm and romantic, to the point where Xie Sui had acted as indifferent as a stranger. Song Yu also felt that they didn’t seem to live in the same world at all, and there was no need for their paths to cross again. He didn’t know how things got to this point.
He’d originally come to attend Song Wanying’s wedding and had planned to leave afterwards, but he stayed for Xie Sui.
His parents couldn’t convince him otherwise and agreed. They were even afraid that he would get bored, so they made him the nominal president of a domestic subsidiary company under the Song Family. When it came to making company decisions, he just had to sign papers.
During that period of time in A City, he couldn’t figure out what Xie Sui wanted to do. He didn’t go looking for a job and spent his days quiet and idle. He even started raising a cat.
Raising a cat?! Why didn’t he plant some plots of grass while he was at it! Did he have any self-awareness of being at a slump in his life?
Finally, one day, Song Yu couldn’t bear it anymore. “Where are you getting money to pay rent from?”
Xie Sui was teasing the cat with his slender fingers. When he heard these words, he suddenly smiled, and his eyes seemed to hold some deep meaning, “Oh yeah, it seems that I’m about to be driven out. What should I do?”
Song Yu: “……” What should he do? He felt that as a childhood friend, he was really going above and beyond!
Xie Sui moved into Changding Residence and lived at his house.
In fact, there was no difference in how they spent their days. There was just the matter of hiding it from his brother.
His brother had a mysterious hostility toward Xie Sui, treating him like a great scourge. Although Song Yu didn’t understand it, he didn’t dare provoke his big brother’s anger.
It was just that every time Song Xu called, Xie Sui would make some noise from beside him. He couldn’t tell if it was intentional or not.
Song Xu’s ears were very sharp, “Is there someone at your place?”
Song Yu’s heart leapt up into his throat, “Ah? Is there? There isn’t, you must have heard wrong.”
Song Xu was suspicious, “I heard wrong?”
Song Yu was firm, “You must have.”
After hanging up the phone, Song Yu clenched his teeth and glared at Xie Sui. Xie Sui smiled at him from the sofa with the cat nestled in his arms. His peach blossom eyes curved, the coldness in them melting, and he was too handsome for words.
When the end of the season arrived, Song Yu ended up getting busier. He was busy at work and at home.
One time, perhaps because the weather had gotten too chilly, he caught a cold. He was dazed and sleepy on his own in the study.
He only came back to consciousness after Xie Sui lightly pushed him.
He was half-asleep, half-awake; his head hurt, and he couldn’t pry his eyes open. He mumbled, “What time is it?”
“Eight o’clock.” A cool and slender hand covered his forehead, and Xie Sui’s cold voice sounded by his ear, holding a trace of helplessness, “Tiring yourself out like this?”
Song Yu’s throat felt very dry, and he acted like a child having a temper tantrum, “I’m not going to the hospital.” He hated hospitals.
Xie Sui replied, “Okay, we won’t go.”
Song Yu was in a daze from the fever, but he was still intent on doing his duties, “I still have a report to finish reading.”
Xie Sui gently kissed the center of his brow, “I’ll help you read it.”
This kiss was too gentle, and he could still feel the touch of it when he woke up the next day. His fever had basically subsided by the time he woke up, but his face felt incredibly hot from his flush.
He hurried out the door, rushed to the company, and was distracted during meetings. When he turned on his computer, ready to start working, he found that Xie Sui had finished all his work last night. He’d answered his emails one by one, and even sorted out the reports from the various departments. The important ones had been specifically highlighted. Everything was set up clearly and simply, saving him a whole pile of work.
The secretary was shocked by his work efficiency last night but still moved on to proper business and reported his itinerary to him, “President Song, there’s a charity dinner in the evening.”
Song Yu: “Push that to someone else.”
The secretary nodded, “Okay, I’ll go arrange it now.”
Simple and direct. After all, Director Song’s side had already explained things clearly to them; when it came to this young master, everything depended on his wishes.
It was likely that no one would blame President Song for bringing down the company, let alone when he was already being so responsible.
Song Yu sat in the office in a trance and began to look back on his feelings for Xie Sui. The more he thought about it, the more confused he became, and the more startled he was by his own thoughts.
It was dark and raining outside. Not long after, a storm even broke out.
Song Yu felt incredibly irritated and wanted to avoid Xie Sui, so he decided to first head to the Song Family home and spend the night there. Yet as a result, he saw Xie Sui standing by the car and waiting for him with an umbrella as soon as he came to the entrance.
He was like a beautiful picture as he stood there, elegant and distant. His sleeves were rolled up, revealing his pale wrists. He wore a valuable watch and seemed to be looking down at the time.
No one in the company was unfamiliar with this face that had appeared repeatedly in financial magazines.
They were so frightened that they almost tripped when they went downstairs.
Song Yu’s footsteps paused on the way down. He was just about to avoid him.
But then a black car suddenly arrived, the wheels sending up splashes of water. After it came to a stop, the door opened abruptly and someone in a black suit stormed out. It was Qin Mo.
“Xie Sui!” After slamming the door heavily, the gentle and polite Fourth Young Master of the Qin Family acted like he’d gone crazy. His eyes were red as he stepped forward, “Do you f*cking know how long I’ve been looking for you?”
Xie Sui’s eyes slanted across his face. There was a shadow of a smile on his features, and his tone was leisurely, “Looking for me?”
Was he tired of living?
Qin Mo approached him, his entire person seeming to hover on the edge of a kind of madness, “If you come back with me now, I won’t let the Xie Family hurt you.”
Xie Sui smiled and looked behind him. The sarcasm in his expression seemed to disperse slightly.
He strode forward on long legs, walked up the steps, and tilted his umbrella slightly. He was still smiling as he said, “Let’s go home.”
Song Yu’s reply came very naturally, “Mm.”
There was a fire burning in his heart now.
Qin Mo was caught out in the rain, becoming a sorry mess. He felt like his heart had been fiercely pulled out when he saw this scene. His lips grew pale and he stared at Song Yu as though he wanted to eat him, “Song, Yu?!”
Song Yu thought of the rumors and his lips curved mockingly, “Is there a reason why Young Master Qin is blocking the entrance to our company?”
Qin Mo’s eyes were crimson, but the anger he felt didn’t show in his words when he looked at Xie Sui, “You disappeared with Song Yu over the past few months? Aren’t you very noble and able to endure? Have you now fallen to the point where you’re so cheap that you’re being kept by others?”
Xie Sui hadn’t yet replied—
Song Yu had already spoken up in annoyance, “Are you mentally ill? Who told you that he’s being kept?”
Qin Mo gritted his teeth.
Song Yu continued, “Can’t you see that we’re in love? Hurry up and get lost. You’re already blind—it would be bad if you also ended up with water in your brain.”
Xie Sui laughed out loud from beside him.
Qin Mo, on the other hand, was filled with anger and despair. His mild mask was torn away, and he looked painfully at Xie Sui.
“Why is it him! Why is it him! I clearly got to know you first! I know that you still hate me, and you blame me for betraying you, but I know that I was wrong now! I even fell out with the Wang Family for your sake! Xie Sui! What the hell more do you want from me?!”
Song Yu felt that he really was an idiot. He turned his head, wrapped his hand around Xie Sui’s neck, and had him bend over.
Then, in the rain, he took the initiative to kiss him on the lips. The clear sweetness of mint drifted between their lips and teeth.
The rain fell heavily from the skies while the two of them kissed each other.
Qin Mo felt like he’d fallen into an ice cellar.
Song Yu ended the kiss. Then, he immediately turned his head back to speak to the madman, “Did you see? If you did, then get lost.”
Qin Mo’s expression was filled with extreme pain and despair. It was like he almost couldn’t breathe.
Song Yu had already dragged Xie Sui into the car with him. After closing the door, he drove away directly, holding back a wave of anger. Song Yu didn’t say a single word until they’d returned home, and Xie Sui also remained silent.
Only after they stepped into the elevator did Song Yu attempt to explain himself. He stared at the changing floor numbers, refusing to look anywhere else, “I was putting on an act for him just now. I don’t want him to pester you anymore.”
Xie Sui: “Hm? What were you acting out?”
Song Yu: “Just… acting like lovers.”
Xie Sui turned his head. There was soft laughter in his eyes as he said slowly, “Acting? Haven’t we been lovers all along?”
Song Yu tilted his head, dumbfounded. A wave of hot air seemed to rush straight into his brain, leaving his mind blank and empty.
Ding. The elevator had reached the top floor.
He walked out like he’d just escaped from something.
… Was Xie Sui crazy, or had he gone crazy?
He was probably the crazy one.
—
Butter’s Thoughts:
Minnnnnnntttt! The peppermintttttttt!!!!! *rolls on the ground like a worm*
I need a doctor’s appointment for all this minty sweetness! Or dentist??
XavierForest’s Thoughts:
SUCK IT, QIN MO
xiin: this flashback to their past is one of my favorite parts of the novel~
translator: xiin
editors: butter & XavierForest
The ambiguous atmosphere between them became as thin as a piece of paper, but no one pierced it.
They interacted the same way as usual at home. Xie Sui’s behavior was very natural; it was as though he was patiently accommodating him.
Song Yu was completely confused. He even turned to Song Wanying, who was on her honeymoon, for advice on this matter, explaining the situation with a mixture of half-truths and lies.
Song Wanying couldn’t stop laughing, “They’re already living in your house—if it’s not a romantic relationship, then what is it? Don’t think about it so much. Go to her room tonight and settle the relationship.”
Song Yu: “…… Forget it.”
When there was a vacation at the company, Song Yu proposed going to Jing City with Xie Sui.
In fact, his entire heart was filled with unease when he asked this question. He wanted to learn more about Xie Sui, but he also knew that Xie Sui’s youth hadn’t been a beautiful one. Jing City may be a nightmare memory for him.
He looked tentatively at Xie Sui, his gaze bumping into a pair of lacquer black eyes that held a smile within.
The man across from him laughed and said, “Okay.”
The corners of Song Yu’s lips kicked up happily.
He followed Xie Sui’s life path and saw everything, starting from Lianyun Street to Jingcheng No.1 High. No.1 High’s school gate had been renovated, and the outer wall had been repainted to cover up the old graffiti.
Xie Sui’s former classroom had already been abandoned.
It was just that, in every place, there was nothing worth remembering for him.
Song Yu sometimes felt that he could see that silent, lonely, and dreary teenager from over ten years ago when he walked across the playground.
His grandmother lived in Jing City.
When they went to stay for a day and visit, the elderly woman greeted them with eyes that were red with excitement. After half a beat, she smiled, shook off her tears, and invited them in
Summers in Jing City were hot during the day and cool at night.
Grandma Meng had gotten older and liked to listen to plays. While they were waiting for dinner, was playing on TV. The sounds of singing were gentle and long.
Song Yu sat on the sofa and remained in a daze for a long time. Suddenly, he sat up straight, as though taken over by something, and tilted his head to say, “If you’d told me back then when you moved to Jing City with Aunt Xu, I probably would’ve followed.”
Xie Sui never liked to hypothesize, but this time, he only smiled lightly and went with his words, “Mm.”
Song Yu continued, “Then, my mother probably would’ve agreed. After all, my grandmother is here.”
Xie Sui: “Yes.”
Song Yu was also amused by his own childish ideas. He joked, “Then, I would transfer to your school, transfer to your class, and become your desk mate.”
Xie Sui smiled lightly, “That’s all one could wish for.”
Song Yu quipped, “I would definitely be very nice to the you from that time, protecting you from those bad things and terrible people.”
Xie Sui laughed. The light from the lamps shone down, showing the tenderness and affection in his eyes.
Song Yu said, “Then, maybe we’ll have gotten together in high school.”
“Mm.” He could no longer resist the tenderness in his heart. Xie Sui leaned over to kiss the young man’s lips, his smile showing in his voice, “Love at first sight.”
Song Yu was almost scared to death. He didn’t know whether to laugh or cry as he pushed him away, “Don’t mess around, my grandma is still here.”
Xie Sui chuckled quietly.
There were scattered stars in the night outside the window. The singing on TV was gentle, sounding as though it had travelled slowly through time, flowing like water. The singing was slow, “He taught me to set away hate, avoid spoiled anger, transform myself. Change my temperament, rest by passing water, turn back in the bitter sea, understand cause and effect.”
Turn back in the bitter sea, understand cause and effect.
Song Yu felt cold all over.
It was like his entire person had sunk into the deep sea. He had a splitting headache and couldn’t even breathe.
The suffocating coldness, indescribable sadness and regret made his heart seize. In the end, all the contents of his dream were forgotten, and only the words from the play rang in his mind.
He felt terrible everywhere.
There was even the faint taste of blood in his mouth. It was very light, but the scent filled his nose.
His thinking felt slow and stiff, and his brain seemed filled with heavy, black mud.
Finally, he was awakened by a complex sound.
“Host.”
Song Yu woke up abruptly, opened his eyes, and sat up, gasping and gulping big mouthfuls of air.
His hair was wet with sweat, and there was a kind of sadness in his heart that wouldn’t go away.
There was a faint blue figure in front of his bed. It was ‘Song Yu’, wearing blue and white hospital clothing, the 008 who had disappeared for who knew how long.
Song Yu didn’t have time to pay attention to him now.
He covered his head and tried hard to recall the contents of his dream, but he was unable to remember it.
008 sighed, his expression very complicated. He reached out and touched Song Yu’s brow.
The pale blue light was very faint.
The taste of blood in his mouth gradually faded away, and the sadness and regret in his heart was expelled by some reassuring force. His brain also recovered its clarity.
Song Yu slowly put his hands back down. His light colored eyes were no longer filled with pain. He calmed down and looked up, but the first question he asked was, “What did I dream of?”
008 shuddered briefly, then hesitated and quibbled, “Nothing much. A nightmare. I was just helping you eliminate those negative emotions.”
Song Yu’s gaze was extremely cold.
008 gritted his teeth and said, “There’s no use looking at me. You already forgot the dream when you woke up, and it’s not like I can help you get it back.”
Song Yu stared at him for a long time. The truth in the dream that repeated ceaselessly finally came out and revealed itself.
He was too lazy to continue talking nonsense. He said calmly, “You’ve come back just in time. I’ve always wanted to ask you something.”
008’s expression stiffened instantly.
Song Yu spoke directly and frankly, “In fact, I’m actually Song Yu, right?”
008’s pale and weak face showed a moment of panic, but he soon managed to pull out a smile, “What are you saying? I’m Song Yu.”
Song Yu was in an extremely bad mood. He sneered, “Fake goods, don’t pretend anymore.”
008 grew anxious, “Host, why would you have this idea? Don’t you remember Song Lan? Have you forgotten your family and memories from your previous life? Also, you transmigrated after reading a book. This is the world in the book. How could you be Song Yu.”
Song Yu: “Don’t. Your acting is really bad.”
Song Yu stared at him coldly, “If you don’t tell me the truth, I’ll go and have a showdown with Xie Sui right now.”
008 grew angry as soon as he heard the words ‘Xie Sui’. The blue light that surrounded him flashed twice, violently.
“What’s the difference between this and having a showdown! What have you been doing while I was away! The protagonist must know that you’re Song Yu now, A City’s Song Yu! I told you not to get close to Xie Sui for your own good. What are you doing!”
Song Yu raised his eyebrows, “For… my own good?” Was there something wrong with your brain?
008 was so angry he was about to spin in circles.
“Cough, how did you just! How did you get to this point again! Forget it.” He sounded dejected as he spoke to Song Yu, “Why do you think I was gone for so long? It was all because of the things you did. The Lord God doesn’t know how to end this situation, since the plot has thoroughly changed after you came to Jing City. The development of many things can only develop as they will. Now, we can only cure a dead horse like it’s a live one1.”
The corner of Song Yu’s lips twitched, “Speak in human words.”
008’s expression was almost pleading. He looked close to collapse and helplessness, “It’ll be fine as long as you don’t get together with Xie Sui.”
Song Yu: “……” 008 had become even more stupid after coming back.
008: “It’s such a small request. Consider it as me begging you. The Lord God and I are both desperate. Boss, host, dad, just leave after the end of this semester. Xie Sui isn’t a little pitiful guy anymore, and you’ve already helped him wherever you could. There’s really nothing worth staying in Jing City for.”
Song Yu frowned. “What the hell.”
008: “Boss, just hold on for a while, just a while. If it wasn’t that the conditions don’t allow for it, the Lord God would want you to leave right now.”
Song Yu froze for a moment. Leaving, or not leaving? He even seemed to have a subconscious resistance to this question.
008: “When this semester is over! Just this semester! I’m just begging you not to get together with Xie Sui during this period of time. Don’t start liking him!”
Song Yu looked at this face, which was as alike as two peas with his own, stayed silent for a long time, and then asked the question that was in his heart.
“Why do you keep emphasizing this?”
008 was about to cry.
“Well, in any case, you just have to listen to me. I’m really doing it for you.”
The faint blue light that surrounded the system shone on Song Yu’s face, making his skin pale and translucent, morbid and harsh. He spoke faintly, “I’ll promise you if you tell me the truth.”
008 screamed like a cat had stepped on his tail, “No way!”
Song Yu wasn’t messing around with him, “Oh, I’ll go and confess to Xie Sui tomorrow.”
“!!!”
“……”
008 was already so angry that he wanted to go into seclusion, “In any case, you’ll be the one who regrets it when the time comes!”
With that, he no longer paid Song Yu any attention and drilled back into his head.
Song Yu was stunned for a moment, then called out twice, but 008 refused to come back out. His heart, which had been all confused and messed up by the dream, had calmed down thanks to the stupid system.
He thought to himself, it turned out that he was indeed Song Yu.
What could the dreams be considered as? He felt that they had always deviated from …
Was it his previous life? In his dream, he’d seemed to be a sick child in his previous life.
“008.”
Song Yu said softly, “I’ve changed my mind. Tell me what kind of illness I have and I’ll promise you.”
The faint blue light shifted slightly. 008 seemed to have been moved by his words and sighed in his mind.
He didn’t even know how many times he’d sighed tonight.
008 said, “You’re not sick now. If you’re sick, then it’s because you’re crazy!”
The word ‘crazy’ was spoken through gritted teeth and held untold amounts of resentment.
“I already said that I’m Song Yu, not a fake. The terminal illness that you originally should have had is in my body. Originally, it wasn’t a big deal at all. You just had to casually say some words to Xie Sui five years later, and you could return to reality. Yet you insisted on making things turn out like this.”
He continued gloomily, “Also, I’m really not fake.”
But he never once denied Song Yu’s guess.
Song Yu stilled slightly, “Terminal illness…”
008 said, “The Lord God and I are both regretting it, really regretting it. I’m so angry. Why does he have to be so obsessed? You’re clearly already… sigh, so annoying.”
008 shut up just in time and continued closing himself up in his mind.
—
Butter’s Thoughts:
I am confusion.