Chapter 20

Chapter 20

20.

The assistant couldn’t endure Ling Yu’s piercing gaze any longer and had to muster the courage to find a topic: “Mr. Xu might be…”

He stammered for a long time, his usually sharp mind unable to come up with a suitable reason to explain why Xu Chi wanted a divorce.

Seeing the assistant struggle, Ling Yu felt as if he had been pricked. His voice was a bit out of control: “Do you also think Xu Chi should divorce me? That I’ve been treating him poorly?”

The assistant opened his mouth but ultimately said nothing. However, his silence was the best answer.

Ling Yu clenched his fists on the table. After a long while, he managed to control his emotions slightly and asked again, “Zheng Ping, do you think I’ve changed?”

Zheng Ping, the assistant, cautiously replied, “Everyone changes, Mr. Ling. You are exceptional.”

“What about Xu Chi?” Ling Yu pressed on.

Zheng Ping looked at Ling Yu uneasily. He didn’t want to meddle in his boss’s personal life, but he had seen Xu Chi change from his initial gentle and soft demeanor to the lifeless state he was in now, as if he had lost all hope of living.

No, Xu Chi was trying to reclaim his life. Divorce was the means he chose to do so.

At this thought, Zheng Ping couldn’t help but sigh inwardly. Now, Xu Chi had no one to rely on but himself.

Zheng Ping lowered his eyes. He admitted that he couldn’t, in good conscience, find reasons—no, excuses—for his boss.

Zheng Ping had been at Ling Yu’s side for a long time and had seen the changes in the relationship between Ling Yu and Xu Chi clearly.

Ling Yu had changed significantly, while Xu Chi stayed the same. Their relationship was no longer balanced.

Ling Yu felt a tightness in his chest, his fingertips trembling uncontrollably. A wave of indescribable anger surged through him, burning him, making him want to destroy everything. How could anyone question his love for Xu Chi? It was too despicable!

But he was powerless and couldn’t even bring himself to question, because these external judgments were based on the signals he had given. To them, his love for Xu Chi wasn’t what it once was.

Zheng Ping had slipped out of the office unnoticed. The food he had brought in the thermal container went untouched by Ling Yu until it turned cold.

After a long day’s work and returning home late at night, despite being physically exhausted, Ling Yu couldn’t sleep at all.

The housekeeper had cleaned the house immaculately, but without Xu Chi, it felt too empty.

Ling Yu slowly wandered around the house, his fingertips occasionally touching the furniture and decorations. It felt like the first time since moving in that he had truly taken in his and Xu Chi’s home.

The villa was truly massive. Being alone here felt like being swallowed up.

They had moved into this villa after their parents passed away. Ling Yu thought about how he left early and came back late every day for work, while Xu Chi stayed alone in this tomb-like house. How had he put up with it?

Ling Yu couldn’t understand it. He only felt a wave of panic rising in his heart.

Ling Yu rushed into the walk-in closet and opened the wardrobe. Seeing Xu Chi’s clothes still hanging there, he finally felt relieved. He caressed the clothes, as if confirming Xu Chi’s presence.

He caressed them over and over, confirming again and again, and his uneasy heart gradually calmed down. He told himself that as long as he didn’t let go, as long as he changed, they could return to how they were before.

Ling Yu barely slept all night, only dozing off for an hour before dawn when the alarm woke him. His phone was filled with various messages, but none from Xu Chi.

Ling Yu got up and washed his face with cold water. His complexion was worse than ever. The mental preparation he had made the day before suddenly felt uncertain, and this uncertainty made his mood terrible, so much so that he didn’t smile at all throughout the day.

The employees who had spoken out of turn the previous day were all on edge, wishing they could disappear into the ground whenever they saw Ling Yu.

Ling Yu didn’t trouble them, but during the meeting, he scolded two people who hadn’t done their jobs well. The entire company was shrouded in a low-pressure atmosphere, with everyone walking on eggshells.

Ling Yu exited the conference room and made his way down the long hallway to his office. All the employees along the way watched him, but Ling Yu ignored their gazes and went straight into his office, collapsing into the chair behind his desk.

He lifted his hand and tiredly rubbed the bridge of his nose. This wasn’t like him at all. He had always been composed, rarely letting his emotions affect his work. But he couldn’t control it. Part of him felt he deserved this, but another part wondered why Xu Chi hadn’t reached out or returned.

He felt a pang of resentment. They had spent ten years together. How could Xu Chi do this to him? Was he really not going to give him another shot?

Three days after Ling Yu returned to Yijiang City, there was a business dinner that evening. With the intent to drown his sorrows, he ended up drinking too much.

After the dinner, Zheng Ping helped Ling Yu leave the hotel. Ling Yu, drunk and disoriented, fumbled for his phone to call Xu Chi. When he was sober, he had wanted to reach out to Xu Chi, but he was too afraid Xu Chi would mention divorce again.

Now, drunk, he realized that after just three days apart, he missed Xu Chi terribly and finally gave in to the urge to call. But no one picked up, no matter how many times he tried.

Zheng Ping was waiting for the driver to pull up. Seeing Ling Yu staring at his phone, looking heartbroken, he was about to comfort him when Ling Yu looked over, hand outstretched, and said, "Let me use your phone."

Zheng Ping hesitated but finally handed over his phone.

Ling Yu quickly punched in Xu Chi’s number and hit call. After a few rings, someone picked up.

Hearing Xu Chi’s voice, Ling Yu felt like crying—Xu Chi didn’t want to talk to him.

Ling Yu quickly pushed down the bitterness welling up inside him and looked up to stop the tears. Just then, a cold breeze swept by, and he saw snowflakes drifting down from the dark sky.

Ling Yu reached out and felt the cold in his palm. He took a deep breath and heard his voice, rough and low, say, "Xu Chi, it’s snowing in Yijiang."

The line went quiet. Ling Yu knew Xu Chi was listening and continued, "I miss you."

Beep. The call was disconnected.

Ling Yu stood in the midst of the heavy snowfall, and the tears he had been holding back finally streamed down his face.

At that moment, he suddenly remembered a time when Xu Chi used to call him frequently, but back then, he was always too busy with work.

Xu Chi knew this, but he still kept reaching out. This unusual behavior was so unlike him.

Only now did Ling Yu realize that Xu Chi had made those calls out of longing, but before Xu Chi could even speak, he had shut him down.

—"I have a meeting."

—"I’m busy right now, let’s talk later."

—"I’ll call you back later."

Or he would simply hang up and reply with a single word: Busy.

And then? He would forget to call back because he was too busy, and by the time he got home late at night, he would wash up and collapse into bed.

Couldn’t he have handled it differently? Was he really so busy that he didn’t even have time to call Xu Chi "honey" or say "I love you"?

How long would it take to say those three words, "I love you"? He could have used those few seconds when he picked up the phone to comfort Xu Chi, but instead, he used that time to brush him off.

Or, if he had remembered to call Xu Chi back after finishing his work, things might have turned out differently.

The time they spent together each day was already so limited. Why hadn’t he cherished it more?

Suddenly, for no reason, Ling Yu’s mind flashed to the medicine in Xu Chi’s suitcase. His expression instantly turned panicked as he realized something.

—Those unanswered calls from Xu Chi might have been cries for help from his lover, but he had failed to receive them.

In the midst of the snowstorm, Ling Yu bent over in pain, as if he no longer had the strength to stand.

The car had already pulled up in front of him, but Ling Yu seemed oblivious. He stood motionless, letting the snow cover him completely.