Chapter 63

Chapter 63: Why Won't You Touch Me?

The moon perched high in the treetops, its silvery glow seeping through the gaps in the curtains and onto the bed. Shen Junlan held his breath as he observed Huo Yanchi’s every move.

Perhaps it was the gentle, sleeping form of Huo Yanchi that allowed Shen Junlan, nestled beside him, to finally settle his chaotic emotions.

Huo Yanchi possessed a kind of magic—unshaken even when Mount Tai crumbled before him, effortlessly dissolving even the heaviest of pressures.

Shen Junlan couldn’t help but recall their conversation before bed. Huo Yanchi had casually brought up the future, speaking with a smile, yet every word felt like a knife stabbing into Shen Junlan’s heart. He couldn’t dwell on it—each sentence felt like a threat to his very life.

Huo Yanchi slipped an arm around his waist, his rough palm brushing against the small of Shen Junlan’s back. Shen Junlan held his breath, eyes slightly narrowed, waiting for Huo Yanchi’s kiss. But after a long moment, Huo Yanchi only chuckled softly.

“Xiao Yezi, what are you expecting?”

Shen Junlan gave a light slap to Huo Yanchi’s forehead, a small, playful reprimand.

“Brother, you’re so annoying. What do you think I’m expecting?”

Hmph, if Cui Jie hadn’t knocked on the door, they would have… Well, the mood was ruined, the feeling was gone, and even Huo Yanchi’s tenderness had vanished.

“Xiao Yezi, lie still. I have something private to say, but only if you’re lying down.”

Shen Junlan pricked up his ears, moving so quickly it was as if he’d hit fast-forward. In a second, he was lying stiffly, even slipping his fingers into Huo Yanchi’s palm.

“Brother, if it’s too private, you can whisper.”

Shen Junlan’s cheeks flushed slightly as he pinched his warm earlobes. Maybe Huo Yanchi had finally come around and wanted to whisper some sweet nothings to him under the covers.

He took a deep breath, his gaze with resolve. He was ready—no matter what Huo Yanchi said, he would remain calm.

He waited and waited, but Huo Yanchi still showed no sign of speaking.

Could it be that the words were so intense they had to be transmitted telepathically?

Shen Junlan poked Huo Yanchi’s waist and whispered, “Brother, did you secretly tell my heart? My heart heard it, but my ears need to hear it too.”

His slightly reddened ear leaned closer, and Huo Yanchi turned to kiss it.

He just didn’t know how to begin.

Huo Yanchi knew better than anyone that once those words were spoken, his Xiao Yezi would overthink everything. But after much deliberation, he couldn’t be selfish. He didn’t want Xiao Yezi to end up like Cui Jie—neither mad nor ghost, trapped in limbo.

“Guai Yezi, I’ve thought it over, and I still don’t want you to die with me. A human’s life is short, just a few decades. But you’re different—you have thousands of years ahead of you. I’ll work hard to earn enough money for you to live comfortably for a millennium.”

“It might be a bit tough for you. If people notice you never age, things could get complicated. So I’m thinking of buying properties in several cities for you to live in wherever you choose.”

“I used to worry you’d be lonely, but now it’s better—at least there’s Liu Qishan to keep you company.”

“Don’t worry about money. If you can’t manage it, there’s Liu Qishan. If necessary, I’ll ask him, plead with him if I have to. I just wonder how technology will evolve in a thousand years and whether you’ll be able to adapt.”

“Xiao Yezi, what do you think about me finding a spot in the countryside and building a manor for you? We could have the old turtle, the python vine, and Xiao Que live there too—some companions to talk to.”

Words like “find someone else” or similar phrases stuck in Huo Yanchi’s throat, impossible to utter.

Would there be someone like him in the future? Someone who knew the exact temperature of water Xiao Yezi preferred, his favorite way to bask in the sun, all his little habits?

He longed to live for thousands of years, but against the passage of time, he was utterly powerless.

“Huo Yanchi, what’s gotten into you? What kind of talk is this? If I were with you just for a fleeting thrill, I wouldn’t have fallen for you in the first place.”

Shen Junlan choked back tears, feeling both hurt and humiliated.

Huo Yanchi worried about everything, but his greatest fear was what would happen to Shen Junlan after he was gone.

“Huo Yanchi, what about you? Where will you be in a thousand years?”

“Me?” Huo Yanchi paused, feigning nonchalance. “Actually, I’ve thought about it. After I’m gone, you can cremate me and turn my ashes into jewelry—a necklace would be nice, with the pendant resting near your heart. That way, I’ll always be with you.”

“Of course, if you find it unsettling, think of a way to take my ashes to Buzhou Mountain, back to where you were born and raised. In a way, it’s another form of being together.”

Heh. Shen Junlan rubbed his sore eyes. Huo Yanchi had already planned it all—a future without him.

His heart ached so fiercely it felt like convulsions, but Shen Junlan held back his tears, not letting a single one fall.

He and Huo Yanchi lay back-to-back, their hearts close yet avoiding each other’s gaze.

What was Huo Yanchi afraid of? Perhaps that the tears he’d held back all night would fall the moment their eyes met.

Shen Junlan was afraid too—afraid of saying things that would hurt them both. The moment he decided to be with Huo Yanchi, he’d made up his mind. He wasn't joking.

Maybe it would be best to mix their ashes together and scatter them over Buzhou Mountain. That way, Huo Yanchi could finally visit his home on Buzhou Mountain, feel the winds he once felt, and smell the flowers he once loved.

“Fine. Let’s make the manor bigger. What if I make more friends in the future and it’s too small to fit everyone?”

Speaking such painful words hurt more than he expected—his heart throbbed, and he lacked even the strength to turn over.

“Okay. My Xiao Yezi will oversee the construction—it’ll be perfect.”

“Xiao Yezi, it’s late. Let’s rest.”

Huo Yanchi closed his eyes, a single tear landing silently in his palm.

Hearing Cui Jie’s story had sparked a terrifying thought in him: if others could steal luck to live forever, why couldn’t he?

The idea surfaced for just a second before Huo Yanchi forcefully suppressed it.

He could never do something so selfish and harmful. All he could truly offer Shen Junlan was his ashes.

Zi Yue deserved to die. How pitiful were those whose fortunes he had stolen? Having grown up neglected by his family, Huo Yanchi suddenly wondered if Zi Yue had played a role in that.

Once greed consumes a person, there’s no turning back.

His mind raced with thoughts until he felt the hand on his waist loosen—Xiao Yezi had turned over ever so lightly.

His words had hurt Xiao Yezi, but stirred by Cui Jie’s story, he feared what irreversible actions Xiao Yezi might take.

At 323 years old, for a flower, life was just beginning.

Huo Yanchi restrained himself from reaching for Shen Junlan’s wrist, forcing his eyes shut as he drifted into a deep sleep.

The moonlight grew thicker.

A shadowy mass settled on the windowsill. Shen Junlan, wide awake, calmly waved at the python vine.

Last time, he hadn’t fully grasped what Huo Yanchi feared. This time, he’d let the python vine guide him into Huo Yanchi’s dreams once more.

"Boss, I'm really risking my life to accompany you."

Everyone knows how formidable Huo Yanchi is. Last time he went in, he almost didn't make it out. This time, he’s only willing to go purely for Shen Junlan’s sake.

Sigh, once you accept favors, you're in someone's debt—what else could he do?

"Enough nonsense, just get started. If anything seems off, run immediately."

Shen Junlan had made up his mind. He didn’t want Huo Yanchi to live in constant fear every day they were together, always counting down to their separation.

Huo Yanchi’s dream this time was nothing like the last. There was no sprawling yellow sand, no parched, cracked earth. As far as the eye could see, there were patches of clivia, all perfect duplicates.

"Wow, boss, your boyfriend has evolved again. He’s no longer satisfied with just one of you—it’s all you everywhere."

Shen Junlan carefully stepped over the flower stems—there was nowhere to step. He waved the python vine away. It wasn’t easy to enter Huo Yanchi’s dream again, so he sent the vine away and kept moving forward.

The clivia flowers were vibrant, lush and green, so vibrant they seemed to glisten.

He turned his head and his gaze fell on Huo Yanchi, lying in a rocking chair.

Dressed in a dark suit, a cane resting beside him, Huo Yanchi saw Shen Junlan approaching and struggled to his feet, as if trying to hide. He covered his face with his hand, then lowered it after a few seconds.

"Who are you?"

His aged voice trembled. Tears sprang to Shen Junlan’s eyes. He thought, Huo Yanchi’s acting is really awful.

If only he had hidden those far-too-expressive eyes, he might have been able to pretend to be a stranger.

"Huo Yanchi, I’m your boyfriend. Yours, Xiao Yezi."

Huo Yanchi was rooted to the spot, unable to move an inch.

He was afraid that as he aged, Shen Junlan would remain a youthful man—they would no longer match.

Shen Junlan took a few steps forward. Huo Yanchi seemed frightened, covering his face and backing away step by step.

He was a coward, really—he couldn't bear to show this side of himself to Shen Junlan.

"Huo Yanchi—"

Shen Junlan ran toward him like a man possessed, gripping Huo Yanchi’s wrist tightly and turning his face toward him.

His delicate fingers traced the wrinkles at the corner of Huo Yanchi’s eyes. His lips curved into a smile as he whispered, "My Huo Yanchi, even when he’s old, is still an incredibly handsome old man. So handsome."

Huo Yanchi’s raised hand fell. He couldn’t bring himself to touch Shen Junlan—it felt wrong.

"Gege, why won’t you touch me? Touch me. Even if you become an old man, I’ll still love you."

Huo Yanchi’s eyes half-closed. He said softly, "This is me in my nineties. If I’m lucky, I might live a few more years. How could someone like me be with you?"

"I’ve thought about it so many times. Sometimes I think I should've died when I was at my best, and stayed with you as a ghost."

As he spoke, the surroundings began to change. A grave appeared, presumably burying the 30-year-old version of Huo Yanchi.

Shen Junlan reached out but clutched at empty air. He couldn’t hold the ghostly version of Huo Yanchi.

Divided by death, able to see but not touch—this was true agony.

Shen Junlan crouched on the ground. When he stood up again, he had become a white-haired old man, hunched and his speech slurred.

"Huo Yanchi, like this, we match."

The next second, Huo Yanchi held Shen Junlan and they fell into a deep pool. Shen Junlan didn’t resist, letting the water rush over them.

If it meant death, then fine.

At the moment when he was about to suffocate, Huo Yanchi’s kiss came, breathing life back into him. Shen Junlan revived immediately.

"Xiao Yezi, have you lost your mind?"

"Yes, meeting you drove me insane."

What did death matter? What did growing old matter? As long as they were together, what did it matter?