Chapter 41: At Eighteen, It’s the Age of Hitting the Pillow and Sleeping

Chapter 41: At Eighteen, You Sleep the Second Your Head Hits the Pillow

"Tea's meant to be sipped slow. No wonder it's bitter when you chug it like that."

Ruan Ciyu pressed his lips together, like he wanted to smile but couldn't quite manage it.

Lan Suzhou smacked his lips, his face a total mess of mixed feelings. "After all that fancy tea at your place, no matter how I try, I can't get anything out of this inn's swill."

"Come on, I'll take you to Ganzhou, and we'll get wasted on Liuyun!"

Just then, the waiter came back all chipper, leading two horses that'd just been fed.

Xiao Die helped Ruan Ciyu up. The veil on his hat nearly flew up in the wind, but Ruan Ciyu calmly pulled it back down.

Ruan Ciyu's voice was crisp and cool: "You drink it. My body's not ready for alcohol yet."

"What's one cup gonna hurt?" Lan Suzhou shot Xiao Die a look, then slung an arm around Ruan Ciyu's waist, pulling him flush against him.

"Besides, the wine's not going anywhere. Drink it once you're all healed up."

Under the jealous stares of everyone in the inn, Lan Suzhou scooped Ruan Ciyu up and carried him onto the carriage like it was nothing.

"Young master! Where's your lady wife from? She's so tall and classy!"

Lan Suzhou had just gotten Ruan Ciyu settled nice and proper on the cushion inside when he heard that. He yanked both curtains shut so tight, not even a mosquito could squeeze in.

Then he hopped back out and snapped at them, "Damn right my wife's tall and classy! Any of you look again, I'll gouge your eyes out."

The folks at that table traded awkward looks and ducked their heads to sip their tea.

Lan Suzhou, strutting like a rooster who just won a fight, climbed back into the carriage, squeezed onto the same cushion as Ruan Ciyu, and finally settled down.

Ruan Ciyu lifted a hand to take off his veiled hat. Lan Suzhou watched the mesh brush over a nose like jade, then over his pale lips, and only then realized his lips looked thin head-on but had a full curve from the side.

Ruan Ciyu cut him a sideways glance and said coolly, "Had your fill?"

Lan Suzhou's throat bobbed.

"Not... not yet." Lan Suzhou stared at him with puppy eyes. "Wife, you're so damn pretty."

"Tsk." Ruan Ciyu jabbed him with his knee. "I'm asking if you've had enough of playing the husband."

Lan Suzhou's voice came out tiny, like a mosquito's buzz: "Well, obviously I haven't had enough of that either."

"But it's whatever!" He peeked at Ruan Ciyu's face and added, "We're already married anyway. Husband or not, same thing."

"We still need one more bow to make it official."

It'd always been Lan Suzhou who was dying to drag Ruan Ciyu through the wedding bows. This was the first time Ruan Ciyu ever brought it up on his own.

Lan Suzhou was all for it: "Once we hit Ganzhou, my folks'll be there too. We can do the bows again. Then they'll be your real in-laws."

Ruan Ciyu: "...Mm."

The carriage went quiet.

"Young master, madam, we're coming up on the city gate. They'll want to lift the curtain to check."

Xiao Die's voice came from outside. Lan Suzhou frowned. "Didn't the Tianbao Inn already hand over our papers ahead of time?"

Ruan Ciyu put a hand on Lan Suzhou's thigh and gave a small shake of his head, keeping his voice low: "It's fine. If we make a fuss about not being checked, that's way more suspicious. Let's just play along."

Lan Suzhou leaned in a bit, dropping his voice too: "Then put your veiled hat back on!"

Ruan Ciyu stared straight ahead, sitting tall and proper, and laid it out with perfect logic: "Wearing a veiled hat inside a carriage would look way weirder."

"When you're in a carriage, they lift both side curtains and the front one too—how many people are in there?"

At Shengjing's city gates, the guards were all imperial troops. With over ten thousand people passing through every day, they'd long gone numb to the job, yelling the same lines on repeat.

But the stowaway in the carriage sure wasn't about to chill out.

Even with late autumn closing in, sweat was beading on Lan Suzhou's temples. "At least cover your face a little? Sure, the thirty thousand Shuofeng Cavalry that came to the capital with me got folded into the imperial guard, but that doesn't mean they're not on shift today. What if someone spots you?"

Ruan Ciyu just gave a small shake of his head.

"I don't show my face much. Only that one time on Huangni Road might a few guards have gotten a clear look. They won't know who I am."

Gods above! You hear this guy?!

His prince, apparently, was a bold gambler, which made him—a former Right Wing General—look like a total coward by comparison.

"Then what about me?" Lan Suzhou whined. "I stand out way more. I ran into a ton of them my very first day in the capital."

If there was a chance the guards at Huangni Road hadn't gotten a good look at Ruan Ciyu's face, Lan Suzhou had gone and picked a fight with the whole escort squad on day one.

Ruan Ciyu saw his face all drooping and curved his lips into a faint smile.

"Princess, come on over into this king's arms."

Lan Suzhou, like he was under a spell, scooted closer, bent down to wrap his arms around Ruan Ciyu's waist, and buried his whole face in the crook of his neck.

He also snuck a sniff of that tea scent on him.

Right then, the guard at the gate yanked the carriage curtain open with the hilt of his sword.

"What're you two up to? How many times I gotta say it—open the curtain for inspection! What're you sneaking around in there for? Hiding something?"

Ruan Ciyu just slipped one finger out of his wide sleeve and calmly tucked a loose strand of dark hair—one that'd come undone when he took off his hat—behind his ear.

The guard's eyes went buggy.

Then the beauty in the carriage tucked the big lump on his shoulder even deeper into his neck, lifted his eyelids just a touch, and shot the guard a cold, distant look.

The guard froze on the spot. A second later, he pulled back out of the carriage, yanked the curtain shut tight, and rubbed his arms.

"Let 'em through!"

"Huh?" The guard next to him was still craning his neck, trying to peek inside through some crack.

"Captain, why'd you stop checking? This carriage is mad suspicious!"

"Suspicious, my ass!"

The guard smacked his subordinate upside the head. "I already checked. Just some regular young master. The Tianbao Inn already greased things over. Go keep an eye on someone else."

The subordinate clutched his head, staring at the carriage a beat longer, still trying to spy inside through some gap.

Such an obvious red flag, and his captain just let it slide. If he could dig up proof that the carriage was hiding outlaws, wouldn't the captain's job be his?

The subordinate stroked his chin and pondered for a moment, feeling he had eagle eyes and was sharper than a tack, while his boss was dumber than a box of rocks.

Perhaps it was the pig heart he'd eaten at his last meal that emboldened him, for after the previous guard moved on to inspect another carriage, the subordinate sneaked up quietly.

Xiao Die slackened the reins, about to drive off, when the subordinate guard grabbed his wrist hard.

"What are you doing? We've already been inspected and given the all-clear."

"Bean sprout, obstructing imperial guards in their duties—careful, you'll get yourself thrown in jail." The subordinate yanked the reins tight, stopping the horse as it was just starting to move, then dragged Xiao Die off the carriage in one pull.

Lan Suzhou clicked his tongue softly inside the carriage.

"What a hassle, blocking me from getting home."

Ruan Ciyu said gently to soothe him: "It's just the last checkpoint. Once we're out of the capital, won't we have all the freedom in the world?"

"Yes, we're two birds flying together." Lan Suzhou's words were sugary and lovey-dovey, but his hands were anything but idle.

He snagged a pearl from Ruan Ciyu's collar, pinching it between his thumb and middle finger.

"Hiss..." Ruan Ciyu clutched his collar back together. "You lecher. There are so many things you could use—why do you have to mess with my clothes?"

"True enough," Lan Suzhou licked his lips, "using something from your clothes would be like rewarding him, and I'd get jealous."

As he spoke, he flicked his wrist, stashing Ruan Ciyu's pearl away, and instead pulled a smaller bead from his own hair tie and flicked it out.

The subordinate guard never even had a chance to lift the carriage curtain before his hand was knocked sideways.

"Damn, what the hell?"

The bead had already bounced off somewhere, and it was only then that the subordinate felt the intense numbness shooting through his wrist. He let out a muffled groan and fell to his knees.

"Let's go, Xiao Die!"

"Huh? Oh!" Xiao Die scrambled back up, jumped back onto the carriage, and swiftly drove it out of the city gate.

It was mid-afternoon, the sun hanging low, not too hot, not too cold. Beyond the city walls, the woods lining the road were already a blaze of red and gold—a splendid sight.

Lan Suzhou lifted the carriage curtain, feeling relieved, though his body still lounged against Ruan Ciyu. He felt bewitched by Ruan Ciyu, his face stuck to the crook of his neck, utterly unable to pull away.

"My lord~" His tone was lazy and drawling. "So nice and cool, so comfortable~"

Ruan Ciyu still sat up straight and proper. "Why so lazy?"

"Exactly," Lan Suzhou forced his eyes open, "isn't it usually you leaning on me, with me holding you?"

Ruan Ciyu smiled slightly, his cool palm covering Lan Suzhou's eyes, his voice equally cool—but with the autumn wind blowing in through the window, his voice turned a bit cold.

"You've been too tired these days, haven't you? We're already out of the city anyway, so get some rest. When we see General Shen, I'll wake you."

"Fine then, lend me your shoulder for a bit longer."

...

Lan Suzhou's voice gradually trailed off.

Ruan Ciyu shifted his shoulders uncomfortably.

He felt like a heavy boulder was strapped to him, like he was being weighed down and drowned.

"Xiao Die..."

His voice trembled slightly.

Xiao Die immediately halted the carriage and lifted the curtain.

"My lord? My lord, what's wrong?!"

"It's nothing..." Ruan Ciyu's voice came out as if forced through gritted teeth. "My shoulder's gone dead..."

He wasn't just numb—he could barely breathe.

"Hurry... get him off of me..."

Ruan Ciyu was crushed so badly he couldn't straighten his back, slumping against the window, his shoulder jammed against the frame, it hurt so much his eyes watered.

"What are you... just standing there for..."

Xiao Die lunged in, grabbing Lan Suzhou's other arm and yanking with all his strength to pull him to the side.

The two of them grunted and heaved together, finally managing to shift Lan Suzhou aside. Ruan Ciyu leaned back in the carriage, wheezing like he had consumption.

"Ha... ha... hoo—cough, cough, cough..."

Ruan Ciyu suddenly doubled over, then jerked upright, coughing violently into his hand, blood-streaked saliva seeping through his fingers.

Staring at the disgusting mess in his palm, Ruan Ciyu felt exhausted all of a sudden.

It seemed his lung disease really had flared up.

But it didn't matter much. Xiao Die used his canteen to wipe Ruan Ciyu's hands clean, front and back, then put warm gloves on him.

Deerskin, lined with rabbit fur—quite extravagant, and winter wasn't even here yet.

"My lord," Xiao Die sighed softly, helping Ruan Ciyu up, "let's get out of here."

Ruan Ciyu pursed his lips, forcing himself not to look at the man slumped to the side. He took a step, then sighed again, pulling his arm out of Xiao Die's grip.

"I'll stay a bit longer. You go on ahead. It won't take long—I just want to say a couple of things to him."