Chapter 240

Chapter 240

This kind of talk would leave the other side feeling awkward either way.

After all, something like stained clothes easily invites unwelcome speculation. Even if Rong Noble Consort put on a polite front and lent the outfit out of courtesy, she’d still be grossed out inside.

If the request was refused, it wouldn’t matter either.

Her maid had already been sent back to fetch a change of clothes, so she wouldn’t be left without anything to wear.

The only real loss was the time wasted. Later, when she met Kangxi again, Consort Ping could slip in a mention of how she had tried to borrow an outfit from Rong Noble Consort in an emergency but was refused.

This would make her look cheap—couldn’t even spare one outfit in a time of need—thus indirectly shifting the blame for making the Emperor wait for nothing onto Rong Noble Consort.

Didn’t this show she didn’t give a damn about His Majesty? Otherwise, why would she be so stingy over such a trivial matter?

If one plot fell through, she’d just wait for another opening.

Consort Ping wasn’t the type to give up just because one scheme failed.

If it didn’t succeed the first time, she would try again, and again.

With enough repetition, it would start to stick, creating a chain reaction.

Past insinuations would not only amplify but also compound over time. Stuff nobody thought twice about before would begin stirring suspicion, and with just a few well-placed words, people’s minds would go straight to the worst.

It was like theft—if you got away with it once, no one would question your integrity.

But if the finger kept getting pointed, even without concrete evidence, doubts would eventually take root. Next thing you know, when stuff disappears, people would instinctively suspect the same person.

That was how it worked.

There was no rift that couldn’t be widened—only efforts that weren’t persistent enough.

The maid tasked with borrowing the outfit from Rong Noble Consort felt uneasy about the request but didn’t dare openly defy Consort Ping’s orders.

She had no choice but to brace herself and go, silently cursing her luck for being on duty that day and getting saddled with such a thankless task—one that risked anger from both sides.

Meanwhile, Su Yi had just finished proudly showing off her "tough-guy pink" to Kangxi when he suddenly invited her for a moonlit stroll.

Her face immediately went stiff.

What fresh hell was this "stroll" nonsense?

They paced these same paths daily. Like moonlight was some damn novelty that they needed to admire now?

"The moonlight is quite lovely tonight—perfect for a walk with you, Noble Consort," Kangxi declared with faux-romantic flair.

But Su Yi wasn’t feeling a single romantic bone in her body.

A stroll? More like signing up to be mosquito bait.

This was peak mosquito season. Even though the palace staff had fumigated the area, those bloodsuckers always got through.

But saying no outright would make her look like a slacker or unwilling to go over something as trivial as bugs.

Is she really the type to make excuses like this?

Of course she isn’t.

“Oh? But Your Majesty, I looked too… and the moonlight tonight seems no different from usual,” she said softly, opening with a negation.

She continued, “Was dinner so good you need to walk it off?”

If he’s not out to feed mosquitoes, he’s just stuffed and restless.

Dinner with company really hits different.

Now he’s so full he’s dragging her out for a stroll.

One for dinner, another for a walk—what a treat.

Ugh, this is ridiculous.

Su Yi had already finished her bedtime routine and was ready to lie down and sleep. She had no desire to go out.

Do you have any idea how much work goes into a woman’s bedtime routine?!

It’s like doing a full face of makeup just to sit at home—total waste!

Of course, Su Yi wasn’t about to indulge him.

She instantly pretended to feel dizzy, sighing faintly,

“Ah, unlike you, I hardly touched my dinner tonight. I’m afraid even a few steps would leave me weak. I wouldn’t want to dampen Your Majesty’s mood.”

Classy people imply, they don’t say it outright.

Polished and proper.

Su Yi lifted a hand to her brow as she spoke and stood up smoothly, her steps light and unsteady as she swayed toward the inner chamber.

To Kangxi, the consort looked like she’d had one too many—the moment she mentioned feeling drunk, she acted the part.

Su Yi was determined. She kept up the act—dizzy, weak, seconds from collapsing if she didn’t lie down.

Still swaying, she made it to the bed and slid under the covers effortlessly.

Kangxi watched her play weak yet nail the landing.

“‘Barely ate’—except for the scraps left.”

Bold words, Consort.

Kangxi didn’t look convinced.

“Really? Let’s see,” he said, grabbing her arm by the bedside and tugging slightly, trying to pull her up.

And... nothing. Su Yi didn’t move.

Except for her arm in Kangxi’s grip, the rest of her didn’t leave the bed.

Kangxi couldn’t budge her—she was digging in hard.

He just stared, silent.

Su Yi wore a blank look, as if she had no idea what he meant.

In reality, it was more like, "Go ahead and say it—see if that gets you anywhere. You still can’t drag me up anyway."

Ugh, so annoying.

What’s more, Su Yi wasn’t the type to get up just because someone teased her for acting like a kid refusing to leave the bed.

Kangxi steeled himself, as if bracing for some major effort.

The next moment, he stepped forward and scooped her up by the waist, lifting her clean off the bed.

The motion even carried a hint of muscle memory—just like how he’d scoop-and-lift Guogaitou (the bowl-cut cat) in one swift motion, catching her completely off guard.

Did she think he’d only resort to dragging? No, he simply hoisted her up by the waist instead.

The funniest part was that Su Yi was lifted like a stiff, straight-up salted fish, her body not bending in the slightest.

Perfectly rigid.

Kangxi looked as though he’d just yanked up a stiff, dried-up fish.

Limp-noodle Su Yi: "…"

No-mercy scoop Kangxi: "!"

Su Yi hadn’t expected him to lift her like that either. She’d been tensing up with all her might, ensuring that even if Kangxi pulled with all his strength, he wouldn’t be able to drag her off the bed.

But failing to drag her didn’t mean he couldn’t just scoop her up entirely.

After all, weight and strength were two different things.

Su Yi caught Kangxi’s deeply stunned expression and went numb—she really did look like a stiff, rigid salted fish, the full-length variety.

Su Yi: "!"

So she immediately relaxed, going limp.

In an instant, she transformed from a stiff salted fish into something more like a liquid cat, her upper body flopping backward so that half her head and torso dangled off the bed, her legs still partly sprawled across it.

Now she was fully leaning into it, playing it off like nope, nada, zilch.

Her attitude was clear: *Do your worst, but I’m not going out for a walk. If you’ve got the nerve, carry me out like this.*

Good luck getting us both through the door like this.

This was a battle of who could out-petty the other.

Meanwhile, Guogaitou lazily stretched nearby. After rising, it first extended into a long, languid stretch, streeetching like a lazy cat.

Once done, it began licking its paws, washing its face before setting off in search of food.

Mrow, I’m starved.

It meowed twice at the two of them, sitting on the bed with its paws splayed out like a frog.

At the moment, Guogaitou was still wearing that cutesy pink lace getup and its little pink hat, tilting its big head as it watched them—its whole vibe impossible to ignore.

After all, with its buff-in-pink aesthetic and frilly lace details, its presence wasn’t subtle in the slightest.

Twice the appeal, effortlessly capturing attention.

Seeing Su Yi and Kangxi looking at it, Chubby Cat licked its lips and meowed at them several times—clearly asking for food, fish treats, or anything edible.

Chubby Cat is the type that demands a bedtime snack before sleeping, only resting after a full belly.

It sure knows how to enjoy life.

Otherwise, it wouldn’t have grown so chubby and robust.

Originally, Su Yi and Kangxi were stuck in a stalemate, but when Chubby Cat sat beside them, staring intently...

Well... it felt just like when you're trying to use the bathroom or take a shower, and your cat insists on following, plonking itself right in front to watch with undivided attention.

It’s impossible to stay mad under such circumstances.

So they decided to call a truce to feed the cat first.

Truthfully, continuing like that wasn’t sustainable either—one’s back would ache, the other’s arms would fall off.

Before the palace servants brought the cat’s meal, Kangxi took off its eye-searingly pink outfit.

His eyes simply couldn’t take it anymore. There was no hope that the consort behind this fashion crime would ever change it, so he took matters into his own hands.

Even then, Chubby Cat resisted. Kangxi, already reeling from the consort’s bizarre aesthetic, now found himself battling a chubby furball dressed in a tiny pink outfit.

In a blink, the cat slipped from his grasp like a greased weasel. Kangxi, not wanting to chase it himself—beneath his dignity—was about to order a servant to do it.

But the cat, oh, it was downright cocky.

After escaping Kangxi’s hold, it dashed a short distance away, then stopped, sat down, and stared at him, meowing.

Not the deep, rough meows, but sugar-coated, fake-sweet *meows*—the kind that sounds deliberately sweet, its tail swaying behind it.

Especially paired with Chubby Cat’s eye-catching little lace outfit and ultra-pink hat, it looked like a full-on drama queen cat, oozing fake innocence.

A straight-up taunt.

This was blatant disrespect to Kangxi.

Kangxi, however, seemed utterly unfazed by the cat’s provocation. He sat unmoving, not even lifting an eyebrow, refusing to give chase.

As if completely ignoring Chubby Cat.

Su Yi, observing from the sidelines, summed up the situation: a cat-and-emperor standoff sparked by a tiny lace outfit.

"Maybe I should take over," Su Yi suggested.

Kangxi smiled gently at her but firmly declined. "That won’t be necessary, Consort. Observe."

Chubby Cat, alas, still didn’t understand the depths of human treachery.

When its meal arrived, it waddled eagerly toward the food—before it was even set down, the cat perked up like it was thanking the chef.

But then an elegant hand suddenly snatched the meal away.

'Smooth brain, zero thoughts' — Chubby Cat: ???

*(Footnote: "Tea cat" (tea cat) is internet slang referring to a cat pretending to be sweet but actually scheming.)*

Then the after-dinner stroll turned into playing with the cat using a teaser wand.

What?

Pothead refuses to chase and paw at this little feather duster teaser, does it?

Kangxi: (smiling)

What if the teaser wasn't a small feather duster but a fish-shaped cat treat?

And what if this teaser was the length of a fishing rod instead of just arm's length?

Just like casting a fishing hook, what's cast out is the little fish treat tied to it.

Jiang Taigong fishes for those willing to take the bait. [A famous Chinese allegory about patience in attracting willing participants.]

Kangxi 'fishes' for cats with a rod - with fish treats as bait, the cat takes the hook.

What snack-craving cat could resist that?

The poor thing didn't stand a chance.

That same smug, slightly mischievous kitten from earlier is now working its little paws off for those treats.

Since when does dinner require this much work? Oh, it's fish treats? Never mind then.

This little hardship and grievance, this kitty can handle it.

Even the little outfit Pothead was so reluctant to take off earlier, now docilely lets the servants undress it.

All to avoid affecting its ninja moves, which would indirectly impact Pothead's ability to get those fish treats.

Ah, Pothead is just that street-smart little cat.

Su Yi leaned against the doorway watching him play-fish Pothead around the courtyard.

Kangxi was merciful - he didn't actually make Pothead fail to catch the fish treats, allowing it to bite one every two or three attempts before hanging a new one to continue.

Though it might also be because someone's icy stare from behind.

Perhaps because tonight's midnight fish treats were a rare treat, Pothead was gobbling them up.

The man and cat seemed to be enjoying this fishing-for-cats game quite happily.

Just then, a palace attendant came to report, saying they came from Lady Ping's chambers.