Chapter 4: Not hungry, not sleepy, not in pain, not crying…

Chapter 4: Not Hungry, Not Tired, Not in Pain, Not Crying...

Xue Li heard the voices of those searching for Lin Ye outside the alley. The footsteps were chaotic and numerous, closing in on them like a tightening noose.

Jianye was their turf, and Lin Ye had set up this trap, making escape seem difficult.

Xue Li felt the toxin from the needle in her shoulder: moderately potent, spreading through her meridians as she moved, slowing her actions, and likely leading to unconsciousness or paralysis.

Death was unlikely. The young master who used the poison appeared to be the rule-following type. Such people rarely engaged in life-and-death struggles.

But Xue Li was different. She was a fugitive who had survived the battlefield of life and death.

If she didn't die, she would fight to the death.

Xue Li ignored the poisoned needle and turned her attention back to the young master, her killing intent renewed. Before her strength failed her, she had to kill the one who had harmed her.

She didn't spare a glance at the fallen hat. One hand reached for Lin Ye's injured shoulder and neck, while the other gathered inner energy, sending a palm strike toward him. Lin Ye raised his shoulder, and the palm strike narrowly grazed his chin. She quickly changed her stance, twisting his arm and kicking his knee, causing him to stumble.

The hat spun on the ground, its veil brushing against their robes as their breaths mingled, rapid and damp.

Liang Chen and the others reached the alley entrance: "Young Master!"

The girl was as fierce as a wolf, and Lin Ye, feeling unwell, was struggling to keep up with just dodging. With reinforcements arriving, Lin Ye had planned to call for help, but he heard a sharp voice questioning, "Was the young master kidnapped near here?"

Lin Ye glanced sideways and saw the leader of the group, a tall and handsome man with a brisk stride. It was indeed the person he had expected: Commander Cao Xing of the Imperial Guards, known for his ruthlessness, cruelty, and lecherous reputation, who had risen through bribery.

Lin Ye looked at the beautiful face of the girl before him.

In an instant, he made a decision. He reached out and grabbed Xue Li, his eyes sharp and bright: "Watch my Rainstorm Pear Blossom Needles."

A flash of silver light appeared at Lin Ye's fingertips. Knowing his cunning, Xue Li immediately prepared to counter his move, redirecting her palm strike mid-course. However, she soon realized that the silver light in Lin Ye's hand was just a crushed flower petal, not a needle. At the same time, Lin Ye's hand swept upward.

A cluster of flower branches hanging by the low wall was yanked down, cascading like rain or a waterfall, covering both of them.

The commotion drew the guards searching outside the alley: "Young Master!"

The commotion also momentarily distracted the guards from noticing Xue Li.

Xue Li didn't care about the numbers. Her vision was blocked by the flower branches, and when she looked up again, the young master leaning against the wall gave her a slow, mischievous smile.

He sighed in mock distress: "Do you really want to die with me? I don't want to, so what now?"

Xue Li's empty eyes flickered slightly at his words.

In life-and-death situations, enemies never spared her. She had prepared for a desperate fight, ready to risk the poison's effects to kill this young master. But Lin Ye had changed his mind midway and wanted to retreat?

Seeing that she hadn't reacted, Lin Ye actually pushed her backward.

Lin Ye turned, clutching his arm, and stumbled out of the alley toward the guards: "I'm here."

Left behind, Xue Li was momentarily stunned, but her peripheral vision caught sight of the guards.

She wasn't someone seeking death. Although she didn't fully understand Lin Ye's actions, she knew she now had a chance to escape this predicament. Xue Li acted decisively, climbing onto the wall, hiding among the trees, and after a few leaps, she left the area.

--

Commander Cao Xing of the Imperial Guards followed the guard Liang Chen, leading the troops to surround the alley.

Liang Chen had been calm, thinking that Lin Ye couldn't possibly be in danger. But now, seeing the bloodstains on the young master's green veil, his expression changed: "Young Master, you're injured?"

Lin Ye waved his hand dismissively.

Although he waved his hand, he walked unsteadily, swaying with each step, making everyone's hearts grow cold. They were afraid he might die right there.

Commander Cao Xing observed this young lord whom no one had seen before.

He was pale to the point of being almost transparent, with long lashes and faint lips, as thin as a sheet of paper and as pure as a daffodil. A youth like this should have been handsome, but there was a chaotic blend of childishness, frailty, and a nonchalant demeanor in his features, making his aura somewhat indistinct and seemingly useless.

Why did the Northern Zhou envoy insist on this person for a marriage alliance?

Cao Xing watched as the extremely weak Lin Ye leaned on Liang Chen for support and began to collapse: "My heart hurts so much, please help me up. Ah, I'm so scared, I might not make it. Liang Chen, will chest pain affect my ability to marry and have children?"

The imperial guards were about to chase after the female bandit, but seeing the young lord so seriously ill, they dared not leave. Seeing Lin Ye holding his forehead and crying out in pain, Liang Chen whispered a reminder: "You said your heart hurts, why are you touching your head?"

Lin Ye replied without changing his expression: "My head is killing me too."

The imperial guards were baffled, unsure whether to believe him or not.

If it were fake, the young lord looked as if a gust of wind could knock him over; if something really happened to him, they couldn't explain it to the emperor. But if it were true, it seemed too contrived.

Lin Ye reached out, seized Cao Xing's hand, and flashed him a grateful smile: "Did my elder brother know I was coming and send you to protect me?"

Cao Xing forced a smile: "Yes. Since the young lord knows, let's go to the palace to report to His Majesty."

Lin Ye shook his head: "That's not acceptable."

Cao Xing understood: "Rest assured, young lord, we will certainly send someone after the female bandit."

Lin Ye scolded: "My guard, Ah Zeng, has gone off to catch the female bandit. I promised Ah Zeng that if he catches the female thief, I would let him serve as a high official. You all have formidable martial arts skills; what if you steal Ah Zeng's credit and he ends up crying?"

Cao Xing was speechless, encountering someone even more shameless than himself, boldly justifying 'pulling strings.'

Liang Chen mused to himself: Ah Zeng would never shed a tear.

Just as he was silently criticizing, he saw Lin Ye turn his head towards him, inviting him to join in this charade: "Ah Zeng is chasing the female bandit, right?"

Liang Chen quickly straightened his back and raised his head.

Though his acting skills weren't as polished as Lin Ye's, he stood tall and upright, exuding an air of trustworthiness and righteousness. He loudly affirmed: "Yes, look, Ah Zeng is in pursuit of the female bandit."

The imperial guards and Lin Ye all followed Liang Chen's pointed direction, spotting a black-clad young man standing atop a high pavilion with black scale tiles, arms crossed, gazing down arrogantly—none other than Ah Zeng, in hot pursuit of the female bandit.

The imperial guards exchanged bewildered glances.

After a moment's thought, Cao Xing decided not to press the issue with this person: "Shall we then escort the young lord to the palace?"

Lin Ye immediately coughed up a mouthful of blood, and Liang Chen exclaimed, "The young lord is so pitiful."

Everyone was on the verge of collapse, and Cao Xing felt a vein on his forehead about to burst, only to hear the young lord say weakly but resolutely: "I need to change into clean clothes before seeing my elder brother."

He stopped coughing up blood and smiled shyly at them: "I'm not familiar with Jianye, please lead the way."

Cao Xing glanced at him: "But young lord, you're bleeding?"

Lin Ye insisted, leaning on the young guard: "Even if I die, I want to die in clean clothes."

Cao Xing clicked his tongue: "...Fine."

Before being surrounded and leaving, Lin Ye looked back at the empty alley behind him, optimistic to the point of recklessness: I wonder if it's right to let a dangerous female bandit roam the city? But she's poisoned, with her skills, she might find a way to detoxify herself.

Then I'll just lock her up again.

--

Lin Ye had destroyed the road out of the city, forcing Xue Li to stay in Jianye City and devise another plan. Before the assassins of "Qin Yueye" found her, she had to deal with the poisoned needle first.

Xue Li returned to the "Chunxiang Pavilion."

Outwardly a brothel, it was actually the spy headquarters of "Qin Yueye." She avoided people along the way, especially the woman she had previously threatened.

She had been here before and was familiar with the paths. Returning to "Chunxiang Pavilion," she noticed nothing had changed. The courtyard, adorned with willows and flowering trees, featured a swing swaying in the breeze and leaves gently falling, crafting a tranquil scene. Covered walkways flanked the pavilion, and as a lady passed under the arched stone gate, Xue Li vaulted over the railing to evade her.

The building had been on heightened alert ever since her last intrusion. While the madam instructed the people in the building to be cautious, Xue Li, familiar with the layout, found a specific room and hid inside.

It was a boudoir, adorned with embroidered curtains, silk drapes, and a plush carpet, radiating elegance. Behind the flowing curtains, Xue Li slipped into the inner chamber and, in the empty room, retrieved clean water and a dagger. She sat cross-legged against the wall and peeled back her shoulder's clothing.

The needle's poison was nothing to scoff at.

In the short journey, Xue Li had been constantly using her qi to evade capture. She had forced the toxin to her shoulder, and now, looking down, she saw that her once fair skin was blackened due to the poison, with vine-like streaks of blood spreading outward, a gruesome sight.

A thin beam of sunlight pierced through the heavy curtains, and sweat dripped down Xue Li's face, her eyes as dark as ink.

Though she barely felt the pain, her body couldn't deny the toxin's spread.

With no antidote and no knowledge of how to detoxify, Xue Li turned to the most straightforward solution.

In the dimly lit room, the sunlight poured in like frost. The girl looked expressionlessly at her shoulder and, without hesitation, drove the dagger downward, excising the flesh from the affected area.

Sweat dripped from her eyelashes to her shoulder, making her shiver. Black blood mingled with flesh, staining the bone crimson.

If one doesn't even care about themselves, what else can they care about?

--

Xue Li excised the flesh, found the needle, and stopped the toxin.

The room stayed empty, and after finishing the gruesome task, dizziness and disorientation overcame her. She leaned against the wall and fell into a deep sleep.

Given the circumstances, unable to leave the city, she had some plans in mind. She needed to find a new way to survive, but she was too exhausted now. She would think about it when she woke up.

Besides, for her—being in excruciating pain or even dying at the hands of others—might not be such a bad release.

--

In her half-asleep state, Xue Li felt an intense cold enveloping her.

It was as if she had been placed in a frozen wasteland, kneeling endlessly, watching the snow fall and everything around her wither.

But she was used to this cold and didn't make a sound. She knelt in the snow, her vision gradually fading, and in her ears, she seemed to hear many voices rising and falling—

"Monster."

"Is she really going on missions with us? I heard she even kills her own people."

"She's practically inhuman... That year when the Song family was wiped out, she cut tens of thousands of times on one person. When asked why, she said it was to practice her knife skills."

"Maybe the leader saw this in her and took her as a disciple, planning to hand over 'Qin Yueye' to her in the future."

"That's terrible. People will say we're a 'den of murderers.'"

The cold permeated her limbs, seemingly freezing her heart as well. Xue Li listened quietly to those voices.

Since childhood, such voices had echoed repeatedly. She walked alone, barely able to take care of herself, and had no energy to care about the opinions of others.

She just kept training, training.

"Xue Li."

A clear, cold voice resonated in Xue Li's dazed mind.

Xue Li looked up in confusion, seeing a ghostly figure through the thick fog, standing behind a stone table and curtains with its back to her. The figure was a constant presence in her memories over the years.

The mountain where she lived and grew up was perpetually shrouded in mist and snow. Countless times, in dreams and reality, she knelt in the snow, chasing after this figure. This figure was her master, Yu Long.

She was an orphan, and from the day her master took her in, her life belonged to him. Martial arts, punishments, poison resistance training—she did whatever her master asked. From a young age, she knew that the vast world and its countless ties seemed endless, but in the end, very few would stay by her side. Her master was one of them.

Strange. Am I dreaming? Dreaming of my master?

Xue Li looked at the figure dressed in white behind the curtain and heard the voice say, "After this mission, Chun Jun said you almost failed and allowed someone to escape. Why?"

Xue Li pondered.

She heard her own dull voice, dissolving into the snowy mist: "I forgot to eat, so I didn't have the strength, and that's why I almost messed up."

After a long silence, Yu Long asked, "Why did you forget to eat?"

Xue Li remained silent.

Yu Long's light voice turned stern: "Answer me."

"Not hungry, didn't notice," the girl said, "just forgot."

She added, "Forgetting isn't a crime."

So she shouldn't be punished.

A long silence hung over the master and disciple, like the swirling snowstorm.

The curtains were folded and creased, and Yu Long remained behind them, not stepping out. A gust of snow lifted, grazing Yu Long's robe. Xue Li stared blankly at the intricate cloud motifs on her master's robe, watching as Yu Long, with his back to her, stood up.

Yu Long said, "Have you stopped caring about these things? Have you lost all feeling?"

Xue Li said nothing.

Yu Long continued, "Not hungry, not sleepy, not in pain, not crying. Not tired, apathetic, detached. You can't feel sadness, nor can you feel joy... Life, for you, has become completely flavorless, with nothing left to desire."

Xue Li remained silent.

For a long, long time.

Xue Li heard her own hollow voice: "Master... why do people live in this world? And why do they cling to this existence?"

Perhaps Yu Long said something more, perhaps he didn't, but her master didn't answer her. Xue Li couldn't remember. All she remembered was that when she came to her senses, Yu Long's voice had grown distant: "Leave the mountain. Our master-disciple bond ends today."

The girl kneeling behind the curtain heard this, and her distant gaze slowly focused, looking toward the curtain.

The fog blurred her vision, and her black hair clung to her cold lips. The wind cracked her face. Perhaps there were wounds, but since she couldn't feel the pain, they didn't count as injuries.

Xue Li heard her own voice, strangely emotionless: "Why? Isn't this the martial arts you made me practice? Isn't this what you wanted? I did everything you asked. Why are you abandoning me?"