Chapter 38

Chapter 38

This discovery sent his heart into turmoil. Li Yang felt his entire body flush, making it even harder to calm down.

He struggled to find even a shred of impossibility, but his mind short-circuited, leaving only one thought swirling relentlessly: he liked Ying Xi.

He really liked Ying Xi.

Since when?

Li Yang felt like an overloaded robot, his head about to smoke. In the end, he had no choice but to grab his phone and post a plea for help.

“Someone likes me—they were instantly into me. At first, I felt nothing for them. But later, they helped me a lot, and I was really grateful. Now, I think I might have started liking them. Why?”

It was just past eleven, and many people online were still awake. The post was flooded with replies right away.

“Feelings just happen. There’s no ‘why’ about it.”

“Is the OP pretty young? When I first realized I liked someone, I also kept wondering why. There must be something about them that makes you like them.”

“They helped you, so your feelings might not be genuine—it could just be gratitude, not real feelings.”

“Ignore that. This is just you liking them. It’s completely normal.”

“Liking them +1.”

“Though the OP didn’t explain clearly, you must’ve had a lot of contact with this person, right? With that kind of interaction, plus them helping you—of course they’re a good person. It’s only natural to develop feelings.”

Li Yang was torn, his emotions bouncing between relief and panic as he read the replies. Eventually, he went numb, plunging into deeper confusion.

His phone vibrated—more replies had come in. After muting it, Li Yang opened them to read carefully.

“Why overthink it? Does the OP have some reason they can’t like this person? Otherwise, why do they seem so resistant and fearful about liking them? Do you actually dislike them?”

Li Yang quickly typed a reply: “I don’t dislike them. They’re great.”

This single response drew even more people online into the discussion.

“Hahaha, so many people replied, and the OP ignored them all. But the moment someone suggested they disliked this person, they immediately clarified. This isn’t just ‘having feelings’—this is full-on liking them.”

Even though they were separated by screens, with no way of seeing each other, Li Yang felt as if his thoughts had been exposed. His face flamed red with embarrassment.

“Anyway, if you’ve had contact with them and don’t dislike them, it’s perfectly normal to develop feelings. If there’s no reason you can’t be together, maybe go for it.”

Li Yang went still.

There really wasn’t any reason they couldn’t be together—except for the fact that he might eventually return to reality.

Other than that, it was just his automatic hesitation towards emotions.

Because he’d never experienced them before, never liked anyone else, these unfamiliar, confusing emotions left him utterly lost, as if he were being slowly roasted over a low flame.

Li Yang rubbed his flaming cheeks, thanked everyone for their advice, and turned off his phone.

The temperature beneath the blankets rose even higher. Li Yang reached out, grabbed a plush toy, and hugged it tightly, trying to distract himself with its softness—until he heard Ying Xi’s breathing.

Steady and even. He was already sound asleep.

Li Yang abruptly opened his eyes.

The plush toy in his arms blocked his view. He lifted it and placed it flat on his body, then peered through the darkness, staring boldly at the boy lying beside him.

The room was so dark he couldn’t even make out a silhouette. But precisely because of that, Li Yang dared to keep his gaze fixed in Ying Xi’s direction, listening to his breathing, his mind strangely calm and relaxed.

Complex emotions spread silently within him. It took a long time before he could finally confirm it—the warm, sugary feeling flooding his heart was affection.

Then, the breathing hitched. Li Yang quickly looked away and hugged the plush toy tighter.

The feelings he’d buried deep in his heart, deliberately ignored, now exploded the moment he acknowledged them.

He squeezed the toy with all his might, only snapping back to reality when he realized he’d nearly squashed it flat. Setting it aside, Li Yang closed his eyes and slowly steadied his breathing, trying to fall asleep.

……

Without warning, his consciousness sharpened. Li Yang’s eyes flew open—he had no idea when he’d dozed off.

The sound of breathing, warm and moist, was right beside his ear, sending waves of heat through his entire body.

Blinking sleepily in confusion, he realized something was wrong—from his current angle, he wasn’t facing the curtains but the door.

Li Yang shifted slightly, only for his arm to bump into the person beside him.

His entire body stiffened. He didn’t dare move another inch.

He’d crossed the boundary again—curled up in Ying Xi’s arms while asleep.

Did Ying Xi know?

His thoughts were scrambled. Li Yang had no idea how long he remained frozen like that.

The room was completely silent, faint light seeping in from behind the curtains.

Ying Xi lay on his side at the very edge of the bed, one arm slung across his waist, the other stretched above his head. His lips were almost touching the ear of the person in his arms, his expression serene—still asleep.

The boy curled against him was so close there wasn’t even a sliver of space between them. Beneath his dark hair, pale skin turned visibly pink, the color spreading all the way down his neck.

Their warmth and scents intertwined, indistinguishable from one another. Li Yang even felt that if he moved just a little, his lips might touch Ying Xi’s.

He wriggled sideways like a worm, but it was useless—the mattress only trembled slightly in response.

The sound of fabric rustling filled the air as the person behind him automatically pulled Li Yang even tighter against his chest, an arm wrapping around his waist.

Even through their clothes, Li Yang shouldn’t have been able to feel Ying Xi’s body heat—yet his entire body shuddered, boiling like a kettle.

His rationality shattered completely. He shoved Ying Xi’s arm away and bolted upright the moment Ying Xi’s eyes fluttered open, stretching over-dramatically as if nothing had happened.

Ying Xi blinked awake. The sensation of another body against his palm had been too real, and the warmth lingering in his arms didn’t belong to him.

He lowered his gaze to his hand, then looked at Li Yang, whose eyes darted everywhere but at him. “Did I just hug you?”

He’d thought it was a dream, but Li Yang’s reaction was off—especially with how red his face was, like a boiled shrimp. It was as if he was screaming what had just happened without saying a word.

“Nope.” Li Yang picked up the plush toy that had somehow fallen off the bed and placed it back in the middle.

His hands clasped behind his back, torso slightly tilted, he fidgeted nonstop for half a minute.

Realizing this only made him more conspicuous, Li Yang began pacing the room, his stiff posture like a rigid coat rack. “You must’ve been dreaming.”

Ying Xi didn't speak, slowly sitting up and pushing his hair back with effortless elegance.

Even freshly awakened, his face remained strikingly handsome.

Li Yang silently averted his gaze, not daring to peek again.

After a brief pause, Ying Xi got out of bed and stared motionlessly at the wrinkled sheets.

Li Yang leaned over to look and wished he could vanish on the spot.

On the two-meter-wide bed, his side was relatively smooth, barely looking slept in.

Ying Xi’s side, however, was covered in creases—just a glance made it obvious that Li Yang had crossed the line and thrashed about relentlessly, pushing Ying Xi to the very edge.

He had initially thought sharing a bed with Ying Xi would make *him* the vulnerable one, but now it seemed the opposite was true.

Li Yang’s eyelids twitched, and before Ying Xi could say anything, he bolted into the bathroom and shut the door.

He exhaled heavily, then froze upon catching his reflection in the mirror.

His reflection showed a face so flushed it looked unnatural. Li Yang pinched his cheeks, then tugged at his collar—only to find the flush extended down his neck. He sighed in resignation.

No doubt Ying Xi had seen everything clearly.

Why did his face betray him like this?

Closing his eyes in defeat, Li Yang turned on the faucet and began washing up.

Five minutes later, the boy emerged with slightly damp bangs. “I’m done. Your turn.”

He turned to flee the suddenly far more awkward bedroom.

Ying Xi called out, “Wait.”

Li Yang turned back to see him plugging in a hairdryer.

“I’m fine,” Li Yang said, ruffling his bangs dismissively. “No need to dry it.”

Ying Xi murmured, “It’s quite wet.”

Li Yang had no choice but to step closer.

As warm air blew through his hair, the warmth he'd barely suppressed came rushing back.

Pressing down his unruly bangs, Li Yang brushed them aside and gestured. “Done. Thanks. I’ll go see about breakfast—you can wash up now.”

Without waiting for a response, he hurried out of the bedroom.

The very click of the door seemed to announce that *something* had happened.

Ying Xi put away the hairdryer, glanced at the bed, then straightened the sheets before staring at his fingers.

So he *had* held Li Yang. It wasn’t a dream.

And Li Yang’s flushed face had already given him the answer.

＊

In the kitchen, Li Yang mechanically made sandwiches, his hands moving on autopilot while his mind floated elsewhere.

Lingdang, tail upright, padded over and meowed twice. Getting no response, it parroted human speech: “Mommy~”

His owner was oddly distracted today—until a paw tapped his leg, jolting him back to reality.

“Is Lingdang hungry?” Li Yang shook his head, dispelling the jumbled thoughts, then picked up the cat and carried it to the living room, refilling its bowl with kibble.

The Black Cat gave a polite meow before burying its face in the food.

“Slow down.” Li Yang stroked its back as his mind replayed every cringe-worthy moment in vivid detail.

*Enough of this.*

He shot to his feet, washed his hands, and threw together the sandwiches in record time. Just as he set them on the table, Ying Xi emerged.

Still in pajamas, all traces of sleepiness had vanished. His striking figure and sharp features grew even more captivating as he closed the door and walked over leisurely.

Li Yang eyed him suspiciously, suspecting he'd taken extra care in the bathroom.

Ying Xi, who hadn’t even combed his hair, sat down and thanked him. Noticing Li Yang’s occasional glances, he rested a hand against his cheek and tilted his head slightly.

“What’s wrong? Something on my face?”

His tone was light, a faint smile curling his lips, his voice soft as a feather—making Li Yang’s breath catch.

Meeting those deep eyes, Li Yang stiffened, instinctively looking away as he grabbed a sandwich and took a hurried bite. “Nothing.”

How had he never noticed before? Ying Xi was flawless from every angle, impossibly attractive in every way.

Realizing he was thinking about Ying Xi *again*, Li Yang lowered his lashes helplessly.

He was done for, falling deeper with every moment.

The only sound in the living room was Lingdang crunching on kibble.

Outside, the weather was clear, sunlight streaming in brightly.

Li Yang sat quietly across the table, picking at his sandwich with exaggerated care.

His posture was neat, his fair, delicate face softened by a dazed expression. His slightly tousled bangs framed dark eyes glued to the tabletop, cheeks still faintly pink, skin smooth and flawless.

The loose collar of his pajamas revealed the black mole near his collarbone—standing out vividly against his pale skin.

Li Yang slowly finished eating, only to realize Ying Xi had barely touched his food.

Chin resting in his palm, Ying Xi’s gaze lingered, darker than usual, focused on some distant thought.

“Take your time. I’ll go change.” Li Yang rinsed his mouth and retreated to his room.

When he returned, Ying Xi had finished breakfast but remained in the same pose.

At the sound of movement, he turned, eyes landing on Li Yang’s light-gray hoodie. “It suits you. Very nice.”

Li Yang thanked him, glancing at a nearby photo frame. Oddly, he felt none of last night’s awkwardness now.

Ying Xi headed into his room.

Moments later, he reappeared in a fitted black turtleneck, a folded jacket draped over his arm, radiating casual confidence.

Used to seeing him in loose clothing, Li Yang’s gaze stuck to the pronounced muscle lines the tight fabric accentuated. He swallowed hard.

“Why... are you dressed like this?” Li Yang struggled to speak.

It made him want to touch those muscles.

“Just trying a different style,” the young man replied softly.

He had the kind of physique that looked slim clothed but ripped underneath, and today's outfit really showed off his height.

As he passed by Li Yang, Ying Xi seemed to notice the desire and impulse in his eyes. He paused beside him, leaning in slightly closer.

“Want to touch?”