Chapter 56

Chapter 56

In the coldest season of Jing City, Ji Qingyu sat unscathed outside the ICU, his fingers tightly clasped. The ICU's red light glowed, doctors hurried in and out, performing emergency procedures.

Ji Qingyu’s eyes were fixed on the door, unmoving. The rescue operation stretched on longer than expected. Someone beside him reached out, and a hushed voice seemed to urge him to rest.

His hand was lifted, then fell back down. He curled up on the chair, a sense of eerie familiarity washing over him. Ji Qingyu blinked. Why was he always relegated to waiting outside, watching?

The cold was unbearable. The surroundings were a cacophony of noise yet strangely silent. He hugged himself, burying his face in his knees. His hair fell, obscuring his vision—a familiar self-protective posture.

The sound of frantic, hurried footsteps echoed from the corridor. Ji Qingyu lifted his gaze to see Luo Sheng approaching, breathless.

"Xiao Yu, how is he? How is he doing?"

Tears streamed from Ji Qingyu’s eyes like beads from a broken string, an endless river of sorrow. He bit his lip, then embraced Luo Sheng, sobbing uncontrollably.

"It’s all my fault. If only I hadn't insisted on moving out, if only I hadn’t kept my distance from him, if only I—"

"It’s not your fault, it’s not your fault." Luo Sheng held Ji Qingyu tightly. Every inch of Ji Qingyu’s body ached. His fingers feebly clutched Luo Sheng’s back. Fu Yunbai followed closely, storming over. He shot Ji Qingyu a furious glare, seemingly about to speak, but in the end, he only sighed.

The winter in Jing City was bitterly cold, yet Ji Qingyu no longer yearned to return to Jiangcheng. He simply wished Fu Han would open his coat and pull him inside.

"A rib pierced his chest cavity, causing hemorrhagic shock. He might not make it. The family should prepare for the worst," a nurse announced as she emerged.

"How many critical condition notices have there been now?" Fu Yunbai demanded.

"My son has suffered so much because of you." Fu Yunbai’s hand shot up, pointing at Ji Qingyu, roaring, "I truly wish you could trade your life for his!"

"Enough!" Luo Sheng shielded Ji Qingyu, confronting Fu Yunbai. "You never treated him like a human being. Why pretend to be a caring father now? Fu Yunbai, neither of us fulfilled our responsibilities as fathers. If it weren’t for Xiao Yu, what would Fu Han have become? Like you?!"

"When he turned the steering wheel, he had already made his decision. What’s the point of saying all this?" Luo Sheng glared fiercely at Fu Yunbai. Fu Yunbai mumbled a few words, then lowered his eyes, falling silent.

"Fu Yunsheng got off too easily. If he fell into my hands, I’d make sure he begged for death but couldn’t find it," Fu Yunbai said with a sinister edge.

Ji Qingyu heard nothing.

Karma, retribution—perhaps from the day he and Fu Han met, everything had inevitably spiraled into the abyss, falling endlessly, plummeting without cease.

Why Fu Yunsheng chose to forgo a chance at resurgence and resort to such a desperate act, no one would ever know.

He died instantly in that suicidal attack. The car spun out, plunged off the cliff, and erupted into a brilliant mushroom cloud.

Ji Qingyu and Fu Han were rescued by the police who arrived shortly after. Ji Qingyu only lost consciousness for a while, suffering a mild concussion that didn’t even require hospitalization for observation.

But Fu Han, on a different floor of the same hospital, had been issued three critical condition notices.

Time stretched on, second by agonizing second. Ji Qingyu sat on the chair by the door, frozen like a mannequin. Hallucinations flooded his mind: Fu Han chatting with him in the high school's storage room, tilting his head and gazing at him, lost in thought... Fu Han fighting with others, getting injured, caught by Ji Qingyu, who scolded him in a panic.

"Can’t you take better care of yourself? You’re always like this. Don’t you feel pain when you’re hurt?" Ji Qingyu didn’t know where he found the courage to yell at Fu Han.

Fu Han didn’t retort. His face was hidden in the shadows of the shabby alley. He turned his head away slightly and whispered something softly. Ji Qingyu didn’t catch it, frowning as he leaned closer to ask what he said, only to have Fu Han suddenly grab his hand.

"Apply medicine for me." Fu Han said, shoving a small medicine bottle into Ji Qingyu’s hand.

"I... I don’t know how." Ji Qingyu’s hand trembled in Fu Han’s grasp.

"What’s so hard about applying medicine? You don’t know how to do anything. You can’t even kiss, can’t even date, and now you can’t even apply medicine. Then why bother meddling in my business?" After saying this, Fu Han turned to leave.

His injuries looked truly terrifying. Ji Qingyu gritted his teeth and pulled him back, applying medicine for him in the cramped alley. He could feel Fu Han’s burning breath against the top of his head, his hoarse panting. Ji Qingyu’s ears flushed red.

"Ji Qingyu, how do people usually pursue you?" After a brief silence, Fu Han suddenly asked abruptly.

"Not many people pursue me." Ji Qingyu carefully applied the ointment to Fu Han’s bleeding wounds. As soon as he finished, he tried to run, but Fu Han caught him.

Fu Han opened his mouth to say something, but Ji Qingyu didn’t listen, shaking off his hand and running away.

The spot where Fu Han had held him felt scorching hot. Ji Qingyu’s breathing was erratic, his heart racing. He ran far, far away before finally stopping, placing his hands on his knees, bending over to catch his breath.

...

Turbid, pale air, bone-chilling cold, an anxious atmosphere, and the red light of the operating room. The entire floor was empty, save for a corridor that seemed to stretch on forever, narrow and cramped.

In the hospital hallway, across so many years, Ji Qingyu suddenly clearly heard what Fu Han had said back then: "Because no one would worry about me the way you do."

Fu Han, are you in pain?

No one has ever asked me that.

The night swallowed everything. Ji Qingyu hung his head low. People came and went around him, but he felt like a doll that had lost all sense of time.

"Xiao Yu, Xiao Yu, can you hear me? Let’s go get something to eat first. You’ve just been in a car accident too. You can’t keep pushing yourself like this. Your body won’t hold up." Luo Sheng shook Ji Qingyu gently.

"Xiao Yu...?"

A hand waved in front of his face, but Ji Qingyu showed no reaction.

"If he won’t eat, force it into his mouth. He’ll have to swallow it eventually," another voice said.

"Get away from here!" Luo Sheng roared at the person beside him.

Ji Qingyu kept his head down, staring at the ground. His fingers were cold, curled tightly together. He blinked, thinking to himself, it’s over—he couldn’t recall a single bad thing about Fu Han.

His countless experiences had taught him not to trust others easily, not to fall into traps again, or else the consequences would be dire. He shouldn’t believe in momentary guilt. To Fu Han, he was just one among many, dispensable.

But was that true?

He couldn’t lie to himself.

His eyes wide open, every nerve in his body screamed that he wanted to hug Fu Han, to say sorry, to tell him how much he had made him suffer lately, and to beg him not to die.

He couldn’t bear to lose anyone else.

He shook his head stiffly, stubbornly staying put, waiting for Fu Han. He waited and waited, not knowing how much time had passed. The sky brightened. Ji Qingyu woke up groggily and found Luo Sheng beside him, letting him lean on him.

Birds cut through the clouds at the horizon. The operating room door creaked open. Light spilled into the corridor. Ji Qingyu opened his eyes, stood up, but his vision suddenly went black. His knees weakened, and he nearly collapsed to the floor.

He frantically peered into the operating room, breathing rapidly. "Doctor, how... how is he?"

"He’s out of critical condition. He’ll need observation for a while longer. Three ribs are broken, but there’s no longer any life-threatening danger. As a young alpha, his recovery ability is strong. You can rest assured," the doctor said.

Ji Qingyu staggered into the room. It was deadly quiet inside. Fu Han seemed barely conscious. Only when Ji Qingyu approached did he sense someone nearby.

He strained to turn toward Ji Qingyu, his eyes seeking him out with a hint of dependence, as if wanting to say something. Ji Qingyu crouched down, leaning close to Fu Han.

Fu Han’s voice was low and soft as he whispered, "Ji Qingyu, I’m in a little pain."

"If it hurts, don’t talk," Ji Qingyu said slowly.

"Then if I’m in pain, will you feel sorry for me?"

Ji Qingyu's heart felt as if it had been stabbed twice; he felt completely shattered. Before his eyes flashed the image of Fu Han covered in red, just before he had fainted.

"Fu Han, do you realize how dangerous this was? You could have died. Even if you survived, you might have been left with permanent damage."

He realized that the pain he felt now was even more intense than when his own voice was ruined, more agonizing than when Fu Han had told him to get lost, more unbearable than anything he had ever experienced.

"It's fine," Fu Han blinked, utterly unconcerned. "The doctor said I heal quickly."

Ji Qingyu cautiously tried to take a look at Fu Han's wound, but before he could lift the blanket, Fu Han stopped him: "Don't..."

In his current state, Fu Han was in no condition to stop him. Ignoring him, Ji Qingyu lifted a corner of the blanket and saw the long, terrifying scar hidden beneath the bandages, with traces of blood still seeping through the gauze.

Ji Qingyu opened his mouth, gasping, struggling to breathe.

Fu Han gripped Ji Qingyu's fingers. His throat had been filled with blood earlier, and his voice was unrecognizably hoarse. He coughed a few times, his hand still clutching tightly, struggling to force out a whisper: "Give... just one more chance... okay?"

Ji Qingyu looked into Fu Han's eyes. Despite sustaining such severe injuries, there was not a trace of regret in them. His gaze remained fixed intently on Ji Qingyu.

If he weren't worried he'd hurt him, Ji Qingyu would have wanted to punch him.

"Fine," Ji Qingyu was silent for a couple seconds, then held Fu Han's hand to his forehead and began crying again.

"This time... you won't take it back, will you?" Fu Han's voice carried a hint of grievance.

"No," Ji Qingyu gasped, repeating over and over, "I won't, I won't, never again... I'm sorry..."

Outside the door, Luo Sheng stood quietly, having also stopped Fu Yunbai from entering. The room was left with only the two of them.

That day, Ji Qingyu realized that if there were fools in this world who were stubbornly devoted to love, Fu Han was surely one of them... and perhaps he himself was no exception.