Chapter 34 Brink of Death “Never let me see you again.”

Chapter 34: Between Life and Death. Never Let Me See You Again.

Wen Song led Yue Rongrong through the marquis' estate with ease. The servants and maids they passed all made way and bowed, but such a display made Yue Rongrong uneasy.

She slowed her pace, and by the time Wen Song noticed and turned around, she had fallen significantly behind. Fearing she might change her mind, he hurried back to urge her on.

"Does the Grand Princess know I'm in the capital?" At the mention of the Grand Princess again, Yue Rongrong shivered, her face paling.

Wen Song showed mild surprise. Seeing the fear in her eyes, he guessed that the Grand Princess's imposing presence from years past still lingered, making her so anxious.

"Don't worry, Miss. Everyone in the marquis' estate has been carefully selected by the marquis himself. They won't speak out of turn. The Grand Princess is unaware yet, and besides..." He paused, glancing at Yue Rongrong, then added, "The Grand Princess rarely interferes in the affairs of the marquis' estate."

Yue Rongrong's tension eased slightly.

When they reached the main courtyard, Wen Song stopped, stepped aside, and inclined his head. "Miss, please go ahead."

Before Yue Rongrong could call out to him, Wen Song had already quickly departed.

Left alone, she entered the courtyard. It was empty; not even the few maids she had seen earlier were in sight. The silence was disquieting. Yue Rongrong advanced cautiously, her anxiety growing with each step.

She took a deep breath at the bedroom door before entering. Her eyes scanned the room and settled on the screen behind it. As she slowly approached, she heard steady footsteps. She stood rooted by the screen.

Shen Jichen emerged from the inner room. Lifting his eyes, he was also taken aback to see her.

He was dressed in a black satin casual robe that swept the floor, tall and elegant. His expression was stern with coldness, and though his face was pale, his gaze remained piercing and determined, inspiring awe.

Frowning slightly, he spoke coldly, "Why are you here?"

Perhaps because of his illness, his voice was low and hoarse, yet it resonated in Yue Rongrong's heart. She hurriedly lowered her eyes and murmured, "Wen Song said you were ill, too ill to get out of bed. He asked me to come see you."

Shen Jichen's eyes narrowed for a moment. He let out a laugh, laced with sarcasm. "Meddlesome." His smile faded, and he regarded her impassively. "Now that you've seen me, you can leave."

Yue Rongrong's heart twinged. Her fingers curled slightly as she maintained her composure and whispered, "I was going to leave anyway."

Shen Jichen's brow furrowed tightly. Watching her turn away, his thin lips pressed into a stern line.

Suddenly, she turned to face him again. "I misunderstood you about the Wei family. I'm sorry."

Shen Jichen continued watching her without a word. Yue Rongrong turned away again.

Just then, Wen Song walked in bearing a medicine bowl. "Marquis, it's time to take your medicine."

Shen Jichen's pent-up anger burst forth. "Who told you to come in! Get out!"

The shout seemed to sap all his energy. He swayed, gripped the bedpost for support, and sat down on the bed.

Wen Song was startled enough to make the dishes on his tray clatter. Steadying himself, he looked pleadingly at Yue Rongrong. She glanced at the medicine on the tray, sighed to herself, took the tray from Wen Song, and said softly, "You may go."

Wen Song, relieved, happily left and closed the door behind him.

Yue Rongrong wasn't sure if her actions would anger Shen Jichen. Holding the tray, she stood by the screen. Shen Jichen merely bowed his head, his hands on his knees, cold and desolate. He said nothing.

Perhaps he wouldn't drive her away? Gathering her courage, Yue Rongrong walked over, set down the tray, and knelt before him with the medicine bowl. Softly, she urged gently, "Time to take your medicine."

Shen Jichen looked up at her, his eyes deep and unreadable. He stared intently but didn't move.

Yue Rongrong stirred the medicine, scooped up a portion, and offered a gentle smile. "Please take the medicine."

His heart softened. He yielded. Very well. As the spoon reached his lips, he obediently opened his mouth and finished the entire bowl.

Yue Rongrong looked at the empty bowl and praised, "You were so good."

Shen Jichen's face darkened. "Do you want to die?"

"No," she replied, a playful glint in her eyes. Their gazes met.

Shen Jichen's eyes were intense and dark. He grabbed her hand. Yue Rongrong's heart jumped as she was pulled toward him. Her knee knocked against his foot, and she stared nervously as Shen Jichen slowly leaned in...

Yue Rongrong, holding onto her last bit of reason, averted her eyes, placed the medicine bowl down, and rose hurriedly. "I should go back."

But his grip on her hand remained firm. Yue Rongrong struggled slightly. Shen Jichen slowly stood up, his gaze lowering to her face, deep and inscrutable. "Who said you could leave?"

Yue Rongrong countered defiantly, "You told me to leave earlier."

"Yue Rongrong!" Shen Jichen's face changed with anger. He turned away and coughed lightly, sitting back down while holding the bedpost.

Yue Rongrong panicked and hurried to pat his back, but he pushed her away.

"Leave."

"..." Yue Rongrong said, "I'm really leaving now?"

His response was another bout of coughing. Watching his hunched form, she relented and knelt down. "Alright, alright, I won't leave. Do you want some water?"

Shen Jichen stopped coughing and glared at her with fury. "Yue Rongrong, you're truly heartless."

Well, sometimes she thought so herself. Because if her heart softened, she might fall back into old patterns.

Yue Rongrong ended up staying. Wen Song, standing outside the door, finally relaxed with a sigh and sent someone to prepare lunch.

The Chef received the message and was quite surprised looking at the menu sent from the main courtyard. "The Marquis has had no appetite these past few days, yet today he requested these dishes?"

A cook said, "It was written by young master Wen Song, so it must be correct. I heard there's a young lady present."

"A young lady?!" another cook exclaimed, eyes wide with surprise. "There's actually a young lady in our marquis' estate who's staying for a meal?"

"Why not? Wasn't there the cousin before?"

"That's different. The cousin is the Marquis's sister. Besides, even when the cousin was here, she never ate in the main courtyard. This young lady..."

*Ahem.* A dry cough interrupted them. The Chef looked at them expressionlessly. "Have you forgotten the rules of the marquis' estate?" He clapped his hands twice, barely containing his excitement. "The Marquis finally has an appetite these days. Everyone, get to work!"

The cooks were invigorated, and the kitchen helpers lowered their heads, each busying themselves.

The Chef added, "Young master Wen Song instructed to use the set of peach-red speckled patterned bowls and dishes from the storehouse."

Another cook couldn't help commenting, "Since when does the Marquis like such flashy and bright things? Last time, that bowl of tonic was also..." Seeing the Chef staring at her, she shut her mouth and turned to take out that set of bowls and dishes from the cupboard.

**

Yue Rongrong watched as Shen Jichen, looking quite spirited, sat behind his desk reviewing documents. She sat beside him, grinding ink for him. When Wen Song came in to serve tea, she glared at him fiercely.

Wen Song pretended not to see, set down the tea and pastries, and left.

Shen Jichen noticed her little action, a hint of amusement flashing in his eyes. "Tired?"

Yue Rongrong said indignantly, "You need to discipline Wen Song properly. He's becoming better and better at lying."

Shen Jichen didn't mind, circling a part of the document with his brush and making a note. "Mm, you can discipline him later."

Yue Rongrong's inkstick paused slightly. A blush spread across her cheeks. She put down the inkstick and muttered, "I'm going to drink some tea."

"Go ahead," Shen Jichen replied.

Yue Rongrong sat on the couch directly opposite the desk, one hand propping up her chin, the other holding a hawthorn blossom pastry as she gazed out at the courtyard. After a while, her eyes drifted, scanning the study before settling on Shen Jichen's face.

Back in Hangzhou, Shen Jichen had been just a minor officer in the military camp. He appeared proud and noble, yet he fought relentlessly, never hesitating or showing fear in fighting bandits and pirates. She had always thought he was striving for military achievements to establish himself in the army. But that wasn't the case—he could have easily risen through the ranks relying on his family's prestige.

She stared at his resolute and stern face, occasionally furrowing his brow slightly, and found herself captivated. Even when Shen Jichen lifted his eyes to look at her, she was slow to avert her gaze.

Shen Jichen leaned back comfortably in his chair, watching her leisurely, a hint of amusement in his calm voice. "Pour me a cup of tea."

"Oh." Yue Rongrong poured the tea, then suddenly reacted and protested lightly, "Can't your maid serve you?"

"Hmm," he said.

Yue Rongrong gritted her teeth and handed him the tea. As he reached out to take it, his fingers brushed against hers—a cool touch. She withdrew her hand, suppressing her slightly racing heart, and asked casually, "What are you reading?"

Shen Jichen said, "Case files from the Board of Punishments."

Yue Rongrong's heart skipped a beat, and her face paled. Afraid he would notice, she hurriedly lowered her head to prepare the ink, forcing calmness. "What does the Board of Punishments have to do with you?"

Shen Jichen looked at her. "Haven't I told you? I'm also a Vice Minister of the Board of Punishments."

Yue Rongrong's fingers smudged with ink in her panic. She stood up flustered. "I'll go wash my hands."

Watching her flustered figure as she retreated, Shen Jichen's sharp gaze darkened.

He was actually a Vice Minister of the Board of Punishments. Yue Rongrong felt extremely uneasy. The prison mine outside the city was under his jurisdiction too. What if one day... Yue Rongrong closed her eyes, refusing to dwell on it, and comforted herself: He's a high official in the Board of Punishments; he wouldn't personally go to such a place! Besides, he wouldn't investigate the prisoners under his charge... It'll be fine. It'll be fine.

Suddenly, Shen Jichen stood behind her, his hand reaching into the water to grasp hers. He said in a low voice, "You've rubbed your hand raw."

Yue Rongrong reacted slowly. By the time she came to her senses, her hand was already in his palm. He carefully wiped it dry with a cloth. She looked at him; his eyes were lowered, his face cold.

"Let's eat first." He was angry but pretended nothing was wrong.

Yue Rongrong also pretended nothing was wrong. The brief tenderness between them vanished quickly—they were at odds beneath the surface.

Wen Song had the meal served. Seeing his marquis's cold expression, he wondered inwardly: What happened? Did they argue again?

Yue Rongrong sat beside Shen Jichen. He served her a piece of grilled fish—the tenderest part of the belly, which she used to love. She lowered her head and ate quietly.

But she soon realized how strange she must seem. He was so shrewd; he might notice something off. So she pulled herself together, looked up, and smiled. "I need to go back after eating. I have some things to attend to."

"What things?" His voice was cool, but his expression softened slightly.

"I've taken on a painting commission that needs to be finished in the next few days. The client is very generous." She spoke with feigned nonchalance.

Shen Jichen glanced at her. "You certainly have many jobs. With your approach, you should have saved quite a bit of silver. Why haven't you bought a house yet?"

Yue Rongrong wished she could bite her tongue for speaking too much. She laughed awkwardly. "Still looking. The ones I like are too expensive."

He wasn't blind to her guilt. The thorn in his heart dug deeper—she had been lying all along.

In this mood, even the finest delicacies tasted like wax to Yue Rongrong. She could barely keep going.

Just then, a cheerful voice rang out. "Perfect timing! I just made it for dinner..." Before he finished, He Minxuan stared at Yue Rongrong in shock. "What are you doing here?"

Yue Rongrong felt awkward too. Now aware of He Minxuan's high status, she naturally thought to stand and greet him, but Shen Jichen pressed her hand down, preventing her from moving. She smiled awkwardly at He Minxuan, then lowered her head to eat, almost burying her face in the bowl.

Shen Jichen lifted her forehead gently. "Eat properly."

"Oh."

He Minxuan gasped sharply. Meeting Shen Jichen's cold gaze, he immediately put on a broad smile. "I came to visit and scrounge a meal." Then he plopped down boldly beside Shen Jichen. When Yue Rongrong looked over, he smiled calmly at her. "Who would have thought we'd get to eat at the same table again."

Yue Rongrong forced a smile, wiped her mouth with a napkin, and stood up. "Well, enjoy your meal. I won't disturb you. I'm heading back."

Before Shen Jichen could say anything, she made a quick escape.

He Minxuan had expected her to run. Calmly picking up his chopsticks, he feigned innocence under Shen Jichen's cold stare. "Why are you looking at me? Wow, you look great today! Is this what they call 'good news brings boundless energy'?"

Shen Jichen wiped his hands with a napkin and tossed it on the table coldly. "Enjoy your meal, Lord He."

He Minxuan grinned. "I won't stand on ceremony."

Shen Jichen sat upright, arms crossed, his expression stern. "Then finish it all."

"..." He Minxuan ate while daring to ask, "Piao Yao, do you truly still care for her, or are you just seeking revenge?"

He genuinely couldn't understand. Shen Jichen was someone who grew up adored by all, a golden child in the eyes of the late emperor and the Grand Empress Dowager. Since childhood, no one dared to wrong him, let alone make him suffer. But after meeting Yue Rongrong, he endured all kinds of humiliation and setbacks. If it were He Minxuan or any of their friends, they would have made Yue Rongrong suffer terribly—showing mercy would be saintly.

Shen Jichen's face darkened. He shot him a cold glance. "Just eat!"

He wouldn't answer him, which He Minxuan had expected.

**

After half a day's delay, Yue Rongrong forced herself to stop overthinking and focus on painting. By the time she snapped out of it, the sun was setting. The embroiderers gradually returned to Yunjin Yard. Yue Rongrong had just put down her brush and stretched when she locked eyes with Du Yan from across the room.

Du Yan sneered sarcastically. "Must be nice to have someone backing you up. Slacking off and earning side money so boldly—who knows what tricks you've pulled behind the scenes."

Yue Rongrong ignored her and turned to go inside. Ren Hanzhen walked in, glanced at her half-finished painting, felt irritated, and coldly looked away.

Zhong Yu hurried over. "Rong Rong, Mrs. Wei sent word inviting you over for a chat."

The urgency made Yue Rongrong fear something had happened again, but it turned out to be a joyous occasion. The Wei residence was filled with guests, toasting and celebrating Wei Hui's appointment as a court official.

Mrs. Wei pulled Yue Rongrong to sit beside her, beaming with joy. A neighbor teased, "Madam Wei, next up must be Hui's wedding! Is it this Miss Yue?"

Everyone cheered. Wei Hui, sitting on the other side of Mrs. Wei, looked at Yue Rongrong with a mix of disappointment and hope. Under the soft yellow light, she looked especially gentle and beautiful.

Just as Yue Rongrong was about to decline, Mrs. Wei held her hand and said, "Don't talk nonsense. This is Hui's sister—can't spread rumors and ruin her prospects."

Her casual remark immediately eased Yue Rongrong's discomfort. Yue Rongrong looked at her gratefully. Mrs. Wei's gaze was full of affection—she genuinely cared for Yue Rongrong.

"Hui's appointment as a deputy official is his fortune and our ancestors' virtue. But Jiangnan is far, so I plan to go with him to look after him." After the banquet, Mrs. Wei held Yue Rongrong's hand and explained.

Yue Rongrong hadn't expected her to leave and felt reluctant. "What about your umbrella shop?"

Mrs. Wei said cheerfully, "I'll close it. But I'll keep this house. I'll give you the keys. If you need it, move in and help look after the place for me."

Yue Rongrong stared at the keys in her hand in surprise. Mrs. Wei, probably afraid she'd refuse, added, "His aunt has been eyeing these two houses. If someone lives here, she won't dare to be too bold. You must hold onto it—don't make me homeless when I return to the capital." She joked.

Sure enough, Yue Rongrong accepted the keys and promised, "Don't worry, madam."

Mrs. Wei pointed to the west room. "That west chamber—if you come, just tidy it up and stay there." Turning around, she saw her son's resentful look and sighed inwardly. "I'll go make some tea."

As soon as she left, Wei Hui approached, looking at Yue Rongrong gloomily without speaking. Yue Rongrong felt puzzled and smiled at him. He still didn't react. Just as she was about to speak, he said stiffly, "Marquis Shen is not a good man!"

"..." Yue Rongrong was stunned for a moment, at a loss for words.

"He's too domineering! Rong Rong, don't be with him."

His expression was so full of resentment that it bordered on pitiable, making Yue Rongrong ask despite herself, "Did he make you cry?"

Wei Hui, feeling deeply hurt, turned away angrily and stormed off, leaving Yue Rongrong utterly bewildered.

Early the next morning, Yue Rongrong went to see Mrs. Wei and Wei Hui off outside the city. Mrs. Wei’s eyes reddened as she held Yue Rongrong tightly for a long time before letting go. Wei Hui stepped forward, looking at her expectantly, hoping for a hug as well. But Yue Rongrong simply patted his shoulder and said brightly, "Take good care of your mother, and be a good official."

Wei Hui grumbled resentfully, "I’m not as domineering as Marquis Shen. I will definitely be a good official—just you wait and see."

Yue Rongrong gave a dry laugh and watched as they boarded the carriage and left the city. She stood there until they were almost out of sight before turning. As she looked up, she suddenly met Shen Jichen’s intense gaze. He was standing right there on the bustling main street, impossible to miss. She froze for a moment. "What are you doing here?"

Shen Jichen glanced in the direction of the departing carriage. "He left the capital today to take up his post. I figured you might come to see him off. What did he say to you?"

Yue Rongrong couldn’t help but suspect that Wei Hui’s distant assignment was Shen Jichen’s doing. But she was afraid of sounding presumptuous if she asked, so she replied coolly, "He said you’re domineering, that you’re a bad person, and that he’ll be a better official than you."

Shen Jichen sneered, "Him?"

"Marquis Shen, stop looking down on people," Yue Rongrong retorted haughtily, turning her face away.

Shen Jichen’s eyes turned cold. "Are you defending him?"

Yue Rongrong shot him a glance and replied stiffly, "Don’t go around accusing people."

A faint trace of amusement flickered in Shen Jichen’s eyes as he said in a low voice, "Get in the carriage. I’m taking you somewhere."

Without giving Yue Rongrong a chance to refuse or ask questions, he took her hand and guided her into the carriage waiting by the street.

"Where are we going?" she asked once she had settled in.

He replied, "To look at a house."

Yue Rongrong felt as if she were being forced into something. Her heart tightened. Making a scene to get out of the carriage now would be inappropriate—better to adapt to the situation as it unfolded. Having made up her mind, she forced herself to calm down.

After traveling for some time, the carriage finally stopped. Shen Jichen got out first and helped her down. Yue Rongrong looked at the narrow alley and the long street, asking, "Where is this?"

Without a word, Shen Jichen took her hand and led her into the alley, pushing open the gate to a courtyard. The yard was filled with blooming hydrangeas swaying in the breeze. He said calmly, "This is Yu’er Lane. It’s a two-courtyard house with a small garden behind the main hall. I’ve calculated—based on your monthly salary and bonuses from Jinxiu Tower, and since I’ve already negotiated the price for you, you can afford it."

This... Yue Rongrong bit her lip. She couldn’t even use the excuse of it being too expensive. She was trapped.

Shen Jichen watched her quietly, taking in her dilemma. Without showing any emotion, he asked, "Is there anything else you’re unsatisfied with?"

Yue Rongrong looked at him, at his expression that suggested he could solve any problem she raised. Moreover, she had already glanced around the courtyard—it was fully equipped, fresh, and elegant, clearly specially prepared. She found herself at a loss for words.

Shen Jichen leisurely held out his hand. Wen Song immediately handed him a contract, which he then spread out on the stone table under the hydrangea tree. "Just sign it, and it’s done."

Sign it? How could she sign? If she signed, she would have to pay. But all her money had been spent on Qu Lieshan’s affairs. Where would she get the money? If this continued, he would surely uncover all her secrets. She couldn’t let him grow suspicious and start investigating—what if he found out about Qu Lieshan... She glanced at the contract, then looked up. Shen Jichen was staring at her expressionlessly. Suddenly, a surge of anger rose from deep within her.

"What are you trying to do, Marquis Shen? Force me to buy this house?" she asked coldly, staring at him. "I assume neither of us has forgotten what happened back then. Are you still trying to pressure me now?"

Shen Jichen’s pale face darkened with fury. Suppressing his anger, he coldly demanded, "Am I the one pressuring you, or is buying a house just an excuse to brush me off?"

Yue Rongrong’s face turned pale. He suspected her after all! Clenching her hands, she forced herself to stay calm. She had deliberately provoked him earlier, hoping to let the matter drop. But now, hearing his words, she flared up angrily, "What do you mean, 'buying a house'? Are you testing me?" She took the offensive, her eyes filled with disappointment.

Shen Jichen’s pupils contracted sharply. His gaze grew heavier as he stared at her. He turned away and let out a bitter laugh, a pained mockery flashing across his face. He stepped closer, his expression cold and stern, looking down at her as he said icily, "So, what are you afraid of?"

Yue Rongrong stepped back in alarm, but he suddenly grabbed her wrist. He roared furiously, "Tell me! What are you afraid of!"

The force of his shout made her tremble. She struggled with all her might, pulling her hand free and pushing him away, screaming hysterically, "Afraid? How could you forget? But I haven’t! Back then, you forced me to be your concubine, imprisoned me! You and your noble mother said you were just toying with me! Even that marriage certificate I treasured so dearly was fake!" The pain of the past pierced her like a sharp sword, leaving her wounded and broken. Trembling with fear and anger, her rationality gone, her eyes filled with tears, she cried, "You’ve humiliated me to this extent. I’ve already stayed far away from you. What else do you want? Do you have to drive me to my death?"

Her heart seemed to burn with the most intense hatred, threatening to consume Shen Jichen entirely. He stood rigidly in place, his heart sinking bit by bit. In a hoarse, disbelieving voice, he asked, "You heard all that? No wonder you tore up the marriage certificate. That certificate..."

"Don’t mention that certificate to me again!" Yue Rongrong covered her ears in despair. She stared at him through tear-filled eyes, gritting out the words, "Such humiliation once was enough!"

Shen Jichen’s jaw tightened into a sharp line. His face gradually paled as he struggled to contain his rage, forcing himself to ask calmly, "Back then, when you left with Qu Lieshan, was it because you were angry with me, or..."

"It was genuine," Yue Rongrong interrupted him flatly. "He treated me ten thousand times better than you ever did." She humiliated him mercilessly.

The last thread of his restraint snapped. His face froze over with ice as he stared at her unblinkingly and asked again, "When I was critically injured, lying between life and death, and my mother came to find you, you heartlessly refused to come—was that true?"

Yue Rongrong’s eyelids twitched. Critically injured... She hadn’t seen the Grand Princess since that day. But now, lifting her head defiantly, she said firmly, "It was to make you give up."

Shen Jichen’s expression changed drastically. Three years of hatred and agony, his love and hate for Yue Rongrong intertwined like raging beasts tearing through him, devouring all reason. The veins on the back of his hands bulged as he suddenly reached out and gripped her neck tightly.

If he killed her, he would be free from this torment forever.

In an instant, Yue Rongrong couldn’t breathe. Her face turned red, then purple. She felt no will to live, but suddenly, she thought of Qu Lieshan. If she died, it wouldn’t matter—but what would happen to Qu Lieshan? Summoning her last ounce of strength, she struggled.

But her efforts were useless. Shen Jichen watched as her face, swollen and discolored, lost all resemblance to her usual self. A memory flashed through his mind—her radiant, dawn-like smile. It struck him like lightning. Terrified, he released his grip. Yue Rongrong collapsed to the ground like a fragile willow, coughing violently.

Shen Jichen stared at his own hand, stiff and trembling. Fear slowly engulfed him. A panic he had never felt before seized his heart. He wanted to step forward, but his soul felt frozen, unable to move.

Wen Song, finally sensing something wrong, rushed in. Seeing Yue Rongrong on the ground, his heart sank with dread. He hurried over to help her up.

Shen Jichen took a step back, his voice icy. "Leave the capital. Never let me see you again."