Chapter 37

Chapter 37

Xie Hang had never seen his fourth brother this focused on messing with someone before.

When they were young in the prince's residence, the brothers would sometimes pass the time by messing with eunuchs and palace maids, but back then the fourth brother had a short attention span—once he'd messed with someone, he wanted to see the next person's reaction, and rarely chose the same target twice, unless he'd forgotten he'd already messed with that person.

This time, for the sake of this young imperial physician, the fourth brother had been playing the part of a male favorite for almost a month and still wasn't bored with it.

He'd really gone all in on this one.

Xie Hang knew his brother's nature. When he'd first moved out of the palace to set up his own household, before he and Song Jin had fallen for each other, the capital's famous beauties would often show up at his place to suck up, joining in on the song-and-dance banquets.

Back then, Xie Yuan was still pretty young, and Xie Hang could tell his brother was put off by the whole "male favorite" scene, so he hadn't wanted to invite him to those banquets.

But the fourth brother was super sensitive back then—couldn't tell if his brother was protecting him or ignoring him, and would just sulk about it.

Rather than risk the fourth brother finding out he hadn't been invited, it was better to just invite him and let him decide whether to show up.

So Xie Yuan would grit his teeth and go every time, wanting to prove he didn't have a problem with his third brother's special hobby.

At first, the young Xie Yuan would show up to every gathering on high alert, a cold look on his little face, using his stare to scare off any guy trying to suck up.

Over time, Xie Yuan, who considered himself a veteran at this, figured out a pattern.

He figured those "special men" would cake on powder and rouge, their faces unnaturally pale, with lip color and blush on top. On the flip side, anyone not wearing that stuff was a normal retainer.

So at these banquets, Xie Yuan would park himself where the retainers hung out, staying far away from the dangerous, made-up crowd.

At one banquet, a male dancer deliberately dressed all clean and simple.

Taking advantage of Prince Qi being a little tipsy, the dancer walked over to his seat, knelt down, and said some soup had gotten on the prince's face. He pulled out a handkerchief, pretending to help wipe it off.

Figuring he was just a household servant, the unsuspecting Xie Yuan turned his face toward the "servant" while keeping up his conversation with the guests.

The male dancer immediately switched to seductive mode, slowly cupping Prince Qi's cheek and leaning in inch by inch.

Xie Yuan's eyes were still on the retainer he was talking to, until he felt the servant's breath on the tip of his nose. Only then did he turn and see the "servant's" face up close—and the lips already puckered.

Xie Yuan was so startled he flipped the low table in front of him.

The male dancer got kicked flying with one blow, banged up pretty bad, and had to stay in bed at the residence for over half a month.

From then on, Xie Yuan made it clear he wouldn't attend any banquets with "those kinds of people."

For over a month after that, the traumatized fourth brother would suddenly get itchy all over and furiously scrub his face and mouth every time he thought about that horrifying image.

Xie Hang found it both funny and exasperating—they hadn't even actually touched faces, was it really that bad?

So this time, messing with the young imperial physician was totally out of character.

His fourth brother had actually volunteered to play the part of a male favorite and was having a blast.

The world had really turned upside down.

Actually curious now, Xie Hang crept forward quietly and pressed: "Come on, what do you mean you 'can't afford the reward'?"

Xie Yuan kept his eyes on the young imperial physician while taking a second to explain to his third brother: "Shen Lian has unique impressions of both of us brothers. You've got over a dozen courtyards stuffed with male favorites, while I'm this pitiful prince who grew up eating scraps. Even after moving out of the palace, I'm still barely scraping by. Even if I got sick, I wouldn't call a physician, because I can't afford the tip."

Xie Hang was caught off guard and nearly let out a pig-squeal laugh, but the fourth brother clamped his hand over Xie Hang's mouth and nose, almost suffocating him.

Once he caught his breath, Xie Hang patted his brother's hand.

Xie Yuan released his grip.

Xie Hang wiped the tears of laughter from his eyes and whispered: "Even I've been pretty generous with him—he's gotta know my financial situation. And the tributes from your Chu State have got the eldest and second brothers green with envy. How could you possibly be broke?"

Xie Yuan explained: "Chu State's money isn't allowed to cross into Wei State."

Xie Hang was curious: "Why? Our Great Wei sends a hefty annual tribute to the Peace Princess too. If it got blocked for no reason, wouldn't that be provocation and basically a declaration of war?"

"Don't ask why," Xie Yuan said. "There's gotta be a rule like that for the logic to work. Otherwise, Lord Shen would never figure out the secret of why I've never called a physician."

Xie Hang was dying laughing, gasping as he shot back: "Even if you really couldn't take Chu State's support, wouldn't your salary as Grand Commander of the Three Northern Towns be enough to keep a few military doctors around? No matter how you spin it, it doesn't add up, right?"

Xie Yuan smiled and shook his head: "That's a pretty cold way to put it. Fighting for Father Emperor—what salary would I need? A few gulps of northwest wind with the soldiers of the Three Towns is more than enough."

Xie Hang laughed so hard he clung to the corridor pillar, couldn't straighten up, and gave up following the young imperial physician.

The sole survivor, Xie Yuan, darted forward quickly.

The young imperial physician had no idea there were footsteps behind him, only focused on whether anyone showed up in his field of vision.

Xie Yuan got even bolder, walking just a few steps behind the young imperial physician.

At first, the young imperial physician kept heading toward where they'd first met.

But at the second fork in the corridor, he hesitated for a good while, then finally headed toward the eastern courtyard.

The east wasn't Song Jin's residence, and it wasn't where he'd first met Xie Yuan either.

Where exactly was this young imperial physician trying to go?

Watching the young physician's panting figure the whole way, Xie Yuan finally reached the eastern courtyard at the far end.

The young imperial physician stopped in his tracks, stared up at the ginkgo tree in the middle of the courtyard for a long time, then suddenly muttered in an aggrieved tone: "Strange... wasn't there supposed to be a plum tree planted here?"

Behind him, Xie Yuan suddenly bent over and clutched his forehead, holding his breath.

With insane willpower, he held back the laughter.

So the young imperial physician really was trying to find him at the plum garden.

He just had to rely on luck when it came to directions.

If you took him to battle against the Oirat, the young imperial physician would wander all the way to the Gobi Desert and launch a surprise attack on the Helan Tribe.

Shen Lian was totally confused right now.

Besides the plum tree turning into a ginkgo tree, the layout of the courtyard seemed different too.

Had he taken the wrong path?

Ugh.

It was all Dian Xia's fault for having such a remote courtyard. Unlike His Highness Prince Xi's and Master Song's places, which were both due north on a straight road with no turns—impossible to get lost no matter how you walked.

No wonder the head eunuch of the residence couldn't remember who Dian Xia was.

Guess the young male concubine wasn't nearly as favored as he'd claimed.

It had all been an act all along—no wonder he wanted to buy back his freedom.

Poor little concubine, he got hurt in that fight with Dehui and his crew, and Prince Xi didn't even call a doctor for him. All these days, how rough must it have been for the little concubine?

Shen Lian was crushed, hanging his head in defeat as he turned and hurried off to find Song Jin's courtyard.

Once he took Master Song's pulse and wrote up a prescription, he could casually ask the eunuchs about Dian Xia's plum garden.

He'd actually already mixed the kidney-tonifying prescription himself...

"Who are you looking for?" Dian Xia's voice suddenly came from behind. "Let me show you the way, Lord Shen."

Shen Lian jumped a foot in the air, spinning around in shock and looking up. "Dian Xia? What are you doing here!"

Xie Yuan smiled, showing the tips of his sharp little fangs, tilting his head to look the young imperial physician in the eye. "That's what I should be asking you. Song Jin's courtyard isn't here. So who are you looking for, Lord Shen? Tell me."

Shen Lian had actually planned to pass by Dian Xia's place to stage a "coincidental" meeting.

But now that Dian Xia was questioning him, he didn't want to admit it. "Prince Xi's mansion is way too big! I remember Master Song living around here—maybe I got it wrong. But why are you here?"

Xie Yuan shrugged. "I live here."

"Liar!" Shen Lian shot back. "The courtyard you live in has plum trees."

Xie Yuan pressed on. "Then why did you end up in the east courtyard by mistake?"

Shen Lian suddenly realized. "This is the east courtyard? No wonder I... wait! It's not like I was looking for you—who said I came to the wrong place? I was looking for Master Song."

Xie Yuan was thoroughly amused. He turned sideways and raised a hand in a gesture of invitation. "Fine. I'll take you to find Song Jin."

Shen Lian glanced around warily, pretending he knew which way to go, before walking off proudly down the corridor Dian Xia had pointed to.

"Why are you in the east courtyard?" Shen Lian, worried about being caught being lost, tried to fish for info. "Dian Xia, when did you see me?"

"I happened to see you as I was stepping out," Xie Yuan said. "Didn't I tell you, this is Prince Xi's mansion—which courtyard can't I sleep in?"

Shen Lian froze.

That sentence instantly brought back the night the little concubine, drunk and lost, stumbled into his bedroom and clung to him like a body pillow.

That memory wasn't all that special, but in the farewell letter Shen Lian had left that day, he'd mentioned that night—specifically his promise to get back at the people who'd hurt the little concubine.

Now Dian Xia suddenly bringing up those words from after that incident made Shen Lian's face flush all the way to his ears with guilt.

"Why aren't you saying anything?" Xie Yuan narrowed his eyes, interrogating him. "Lord Shen looks pretty guilty—did you do something to betray your brother?"

Shen Lian immediately straightened up. "Nonsense! I'm such a loyal guy, you... don't you know that?"

Had the little concubine not read that farewell letter yet?

Xie Yuan let out a snicker. "Is that so? But it's not exactly equal treatment, is it? Brothers come in all ranks—some friends only get street-stall food, while others get to 'pick whatever they want.'"

Shen Lian stared blankly at the little concubine's expression.

Why did he look so annoyed, like he was here to demand an explanation?

"What ranks?" Shen Lian didn't follow, since the farewell letter hadn't mentioned street stalls. "What are you talking about, Dian Xia?"

"Nothing." Xie Yuan looked nonchalant, like he was just making small talk. "I'm just curious where he chose to go, and how much of my buyout money he blew."

Shen Lian was dumbfounded. He stopped in his tracks, grabbed Dian Xia's arm, and raised his hand to feel his forehead for a fever.

Xie Yuan, once bitten twice shy, suddenly recoiled. "What are you doing?"

"Don't move!" Shen Lian urged. "Let me feel."

Xie Yuan looked confused and wary as he lowered his head to meet the young physician's eyes.

But he didn't dodge, and he didn't stop the hand from pressing against his forehead.

A breeze came.

Snowflakes from the branches were swept up, drifting sideways into the corridor, landing on Xie Yuan's long, thick lashes.

He kept watching the young physician warily.

"No fever?" Shen Lian pulled his hand back, looking concerned. "Why do you keep talking nonsense, Dian Xia? Are you feeling sick somewhere?"

Xie Yuan was taken aback, then let out a wary, cold laugh. "Why would I feel sick? But some money-grubber suddenly got all generous—picking anything they want—didn't they cry when the bill came?"

"Ah! Something's really off—did you get your head bashed in?" Shen Lian grabbed the little concubine's wrist and started taking his pulse. "Dian Xia, did you get internal injuries?"

"What do you mean?" Xie Yuan suspected the young physician was being a smartass.

Shen Lian looked worried. "Your pulse isn't blocked? Dian Xia, don't tough it out—did those people from Dehui Medical Hall hurt you anywhere that day? Or is there some lingering pain?"

Xie Yuan watched him in silence.

After a long moment, he finally figured out what the young physician meant.

"Hurt me?" Xie Yuan shot back. "Didn't I tell you, once those people found out I was the Princess Consort of Xi, they all ran off scared."

"Don't keep hiding it from me." Shen Lian called him out, annoyed. "I know all about it. You injured several of those people at Dehui Medical Hall, so you must have been badly hurt too. You left in a hurry because you were afraid I'd worry."

Xie Yuan went quiet, dazed.

After mulling it over for a while, he finally pieced together the young physician's logic.

Xie Yuan suddenly threw his head back and cracked up.

"What on earth?" Xie Yuan looked at the young physician, thoroughly amused. "What goes through your head all day? Have you been reading too many crazy storybooks? I was badly injured, and I'd hide from you so you wouldn't worry? Dream on—if I were badly injured, I'd cling to you and demand to pick anything I want every single day."

Shen Lian's hanging heart finally dropped dead.

Fine, this was more in line with the little concubine's personality—he really had been overthinking it.

At least it seemed like Dian Xia hadn't read the farewell letter he'd written.

Otherwise, given this brat's nasty temperament, the moment they met, he'd have whipped out the letter and started reciting it like poetry.

Damn it!

Then he absolutely couldn't let the wicked little concubine see that letter. Where were the eunuchs? Where! Give him back that "mortifying letter" now!!!

Shen Lian shot back with a sidelong glare. "You're the one who's been reading too many storybooks and letting your imagination run wild. What 'pick anything you want'—what nonsense are you spouting?"

"Oh? Lord Shen dares to do it but won't own up to it?" Xie Yuan narrowed his eyes in accusation. "The yamen runners already told the mansion—that ungrateful physician, the moment he got away, took a few errand boys from the garrison to a tavern and feasted for days, and still hasn't come to the mansion to thank his rescuer."