Chapter 42

Chapter 42

Overcome with shock and rage—

Smack!

A crisp slap landed, leaving Ming Fei Yu somewhat dazed.

The more Xie Zhi Gui thought about how he had been toyed with for so long, the more the anger didn't find a place to rest, burning inside as if scorching his internal organs.

He wanted to slap him again; one slap was too light a punishment for this cur.

However, as his hand was raised, Ming Fei Yu grasped it, and he could not struggle free.

"Stop hitting; doesn't your hand hurt?"

"Who would care about pain when beating a dog!" Xie Zhi Gui's retort was sharp, causing Ming Fei Yu to frown deeply.

Xie Zhi Gui felt his heart nearly explode with rage, giving no chance for a response, eager to unleash the anger, the grievances, the suppression that had accumulated for so long.

He raised his unrestrained left hand for another slap and, before Ming Fei Yu could react, his emotions overwhelmed him, erupting in a furious roar: "You cur! What have I ever done to deserve such manipulation by you?!"

"How can you justify this to your lover? Don’t you love him dearly? Don’t you pine for him ceaselessly? Isn’t your affection so deep that you’d degrade yourself just to keep him close? What are you doing now? Having me take his place in your bed, under the moon and amidst the flowers, having me do what he should be doing—where have you put him? How can you be worthy of him?!"

The accusatory "How can you be worthy?" echoed through the rainy night.

Ming Fei Yu opened his mouth to say something, but Xie Zhi Gui gave him no chance to speak.

He kicked out blindly, not caring if he hit his target, his eyes red as he demanded, "What have I done wrong?! We were strangers before this, no deep hatred between us! And yet, you humiliate me so! Is it just because I have a face resembling that of your lover? But it wasn’t I who stabbed you! Every debt has its debtor, every wrong its doer; why should I bear the torment meant for him?!"

Ming Fei Yu paused, then tried to soothe him, "That's not it, calm down."

Smack.

Xie Zhi Gui knocked his hand away, glaring at him with revulsion, "Get away! Don’t touch me!"

"Ming Fei Yu, your so-called deep affection is truly nauseating!"

"You claim to be unable to forget your lover, yet you seek solace in others. Don't hide behind excuses of resemblance to reminisce; transferring affection is just that! Infidelity is infidelity!"

“……”

After his hysterical outburst, Ming Fei Yu fell silent, not moving, simply gazing into Xie Zhi Gui’s eyes. It was as if he was looking through him at someone else, or perhaps just at the man before him, a hint of heartache in his expression.

Xie Zhi Gui’s chest burned with anger, finding the situation absurdly funny. What right did this scoundrel have to look heartbroken, as if he was the one aggrieved? Was he wrong in his accusations?

The situation had progressed beyond the point of no return.

He could no longer bother to maintain any dignity; he might as well pour out all the words buried in his heart.

Evil begets from the heart, and since survival today was uncertain, why fear offending this bastard any longer?

"Ming Fei Yu, you like this face, don’t you? Well, I tell you now, even in death, I won’t let you have it!"

Having said that, he suddenly snatched the knife from Ming Fei Yu’s hand and slashed towards his own cheek, so swiftly that Ming Fei Yu had no time to react.

Tear!

The blade sliced the air, the smell of blood spreading, yet the anticipated pain did not arrive. Xie Zhi Gui turned his head to see the knife halted just an inch from his face, held firmly by Ming Fei Yu.

Ming Fei Yu's eyes were terrifying in that moment, internally relieved that he caught the blade in time.

He pinned Xie Zhi Gui’s hand, wresting the knife away with such force that Xie Zhi Gui couldn’t resist. He silently extracted it from his own palm, where it had cut him, blood gushing forth, yet he did not so much as gasp for breath.

This eerie silence only heightened Xie Zhi Gui’s unease.

What was even more bizarre was that Ming Fei Yu didn’t get angry; instead, he tenderly tucked the stray hairs on Xie Zhi Gui's forehead behind his ear and gently rubbed the tip of his ear, his expression akin to soothing a lover, softly coaxing, "What did you just say?"

Xie Zhi Gui stood stiff-necked, unappreciative, and spoke with full malice, "I said, I want to destroy this face."

Ming Fei Yu shook his head, "Not that sentence."

Impatiently, Xie Zhi Gui said, "I said, even if I die I won't..."

Before he could finish, the knife plunged straight into the wall behind him! The blade was mere inches from him; a slight deviation would have shattered his skull!

He stiffly tilted his head, the crimson blade reflecting his suddenly pale face and quivering pupils; he fell instantly silent.

In that moment, had Ming Fei Yu thought about ending his life?

He dared not dwell on the thought.

Ming Fei Yu pulled out the knife and nonchalantly tossed it out of the window, still smiling as he lifted Xie Zhi Gui's chin, forcing him to look directly at him, yet his breath was chillingly cold, "Do you wish to die?"

"I, I..."

"Then shall I oblige you?"

Xie Zhi Gui looked at him in terror, his limbs icy, having forgotten even how to breathe.

He understood then.

He didn’t want to die after all.

He wanted to live.

A person truly wishing death wouldn’t fear the knife’s thrust; he spoke of death to infuriate Ming Fei Yu, to push him into a concession, to coax a softness out of him just this once.

But it seemed he chose the wrong leverage and instead enraged Ming Fei Yu.

Head hung, he remained silent for a long time, until Ming Fei Yu's fleeting gentleness vanished completely. He had waited long enough, had endured enough.

He wanted to teach Xie Zhi Gui a lesson, to ensure he would never frivolously gamble with life and death again.

A hand, cool as ice, slithered down like a serpent, grasping Xie Zhi Gui's neck, fingertips grazing the skin, cold enough to raise goosebumps all over his body.

Then, Xie Zhi Gui heard what sounded like the final pronouncement of a death sentence—

"Xie Zhi Gui, I will not forgive you this time."

"Absolutely unforgivable."

Each sentence echoed as if rising from the depths of an empty hell.

Veins of blood crept into Ming Fei Yu’s eyes in an instant as he suddenly tightened his grip on Xie Zhi Gui's neck, his eyes brimming with intense pain born of hatred.

He watched Xie Zhi Gui’s face turn a swollen red, his breathing became labored, producing only fragmented nasal sounds, as he looked at him in desperation and pain, his hands frantically grabbing at Ming Fei Yu’s arms, trying to pull them away.

Then, just as Xie Zhi Gui was on the verge of asphyxiation, he released his grip.

"Cough, cough, cough... cough, cough..." Xie Zhi Gui supported himself on his hands, gasping for air, his hair disheveled and covering his face, and tears as well.

Just moments ago, he truly felt on the brink of death, even beginning to hallucinate.

Ming Fei Yu grabbed his hair, forcing him to lift his face, staring into his tearful eyes, and asked coldly, "Dare you still seek death?"

Rage surged in Xie Zhi Gui, and with all his strength, he slapped Ming Fei Yu and cursed outright, "Are you sick in the head? A mad dog!"

"Ah! ...Ugh, ugh! ..."

Before Xie Zhi Gui could catch his breath fully, Ming Fei Yu was choking him again, dragging him back into the terror of suffocation, over and over again. Xie Zhi Gui’s struggles left countless nail marks on his arms, scratching until the blood flowed freely, but it did not stop Ming Fei Yu one bit, nor did he seem to feel any pain.

Xie Zhi Gui began by cursing and desperately struggling, repeatedly fluctuating between death’s door and the relief of survival. His mental fortitude was assaulted time and again, the walls breached, as merciless sands of torment rushed in, hastening their collapse.

Eventually, he truly feared Ming Fei Yu, the madman, let go of his stubbornness, and through tears, pleaded desperately for him to stop.

"Cough, cough, cough... cough, cough..."

"I know I was wrong, truly."

"I don’t want to die, I really don't."

"Ming... Ming Fei Yu... Er-ge..."

Hearing these words, Ming Fei Yu loosened his grip and then gently wiped away his tears, as if the violent person just before had not been him.

He asked again, "Do you still dare to seek death?"

"No, I wouldn't dare."

"Would you dare to recklessly leap off cliffs again?"

"No, no..."

"And would you harm yourself with a knife again?"

Xie Zhigui shook his head frantically, looking at Ming Fei Yu with extreme terror, aware of a certain morbid fixation in the other's questions that he must not contradict.

Thus, he complied, "I won't, not ever again."

"Good, that's a good boy."

Ming Fei Yu reached out a hand satisfyingly towards him, and despite trying, Xie Zhigui couldn't suppress the fear inside, screaming — "Ah!"

He quickly closed his eyes, clutched his head, and his body kept curling into the corner, like a greatly frightened little animal, assuming a highly vigilant and defensive posture.

"Don't be afraid, I won't lay a hand on you again."

Ming Fei Yu placed his palm gently on Xie Zhigui's head, rubbing it tenderly as if afraid of startling him.

A look of resentment flashed through Xie Zhigui’s eyes, then cleverly concealed at the bottom of his gaze, showing only terror to Ming Fei Yu.

Seeing the mottled bruise marks on his neck, Ming Fei Yu regretted using too much force and wanted to rub them to dissipate the bruises, but upon touching Xie Zhigui, he recoiled like a hedgehog, turning himself into a ball bristling with spikes.

"Don't, don't touch me, it hurts."

"It's over, no need to be afraid."

Ming Fei Yu gently embraced the frightened man, soothingly patting his back with a helpless sigh, "I won't kill you."

"Because you never listen to me, I had to resort to this method to make you remember. I want you to forever remember today, acts like jumping off cliffs in search of death, I cannot tolerate it once, nor will I ever forgive it, there must not be a next time, do you understand?"

The person in his arms moved slightly, replying softly with a cry in his voice, "I remember."

Ming Fei Yu held him tight, relieved, letting out a long breath.

As long as he doesn't seek his own death, he would shield him from all storms. No sword or slaughter would ever reach him; he would be safe and carefree for a long time to come.

They embraced for what felt like an eternity as the rain intensified outside the window, breaking the silence with its pitter-patter, stirring up a clamor.

Ming Fei Yu felt the ground grow cold and wanted to carry Xie Zhigui away, but he remained curled up, staring blankly at a spot, prompting Ming Fei Yu to pinch his cheek.

"Sitting on the ground will give you a cold. Let me take you to sit on the bed."

"…Okay." Xie Zhigui's response was faint, his voice hoarse.

He glanced at Ming Fei Yu and voluntarily opened his arms, wrapping them around his neck and burying his head in his chest, his compliance and stillness uncharacteristically serene.

After the events that had just unfolded, he had learned his lesson.

Ming Fei Yu looked down at him and let out a soft chuckle before planting a tender kiss on his hair. He then scooped him up, away from the chilly, damp ground.

This was a compromise between the two, a step back for each, tacitly agreeing to momentarily set aside their recent discord and to quietly weather the endless downpour together.

Xie Zhigui was securely placed in the bed. His legs were both sore and cold, and it hurt immensely just to straighten them. Ming Fei Yu rolled up his pant leg to reveal a knee bruised and swollen. He massaged around the wound for a while, easing the intensity of the pain.

Just as Xie Zhigui was about to pull up the covers, Ming Fei Yu stopped him.

Xie Zhigui asked warily, "What are you doing?"

Ming Fei Yu opened his hand to show him—on it were two ferocious scars; one was from an earlier escape attempt, and the other was fresh from grabbing the blade with his bare hands. The recent struggle had reopened the wound, and blood was trickling down the lines of his palm, dripping onto the bedding like beads on a string.

Xie Zhigui felt a twinge of guilt: "What… what does this mean?"

"You caused these wounds; you're responsible for taking care of them."

Xie Zhigui looked at him, his eyes red-rimmed, and asked, "What do you want me to do?"

Ming Fei Yu smiled, wrapping his arm around Xie Zhigui's shoulder covertly and bending down to whisper in his ear, "Lick the blood clean."

Xie Zhigui started, immediately trying to push him away, but the brute was too heavy and firm, immovable as a rock.

Annoyed, he turned his head away, protesting, "I don’t want to!"

"Didn't you say it was over?"

Ming Fei Yu replied, "I said the cliff-jumping episode was over, but the matters of you running away and injuring me are far from resolved."

“……”

As they spoke, Ming Fei Yu's hand once again touched the back of Xie Zhigui's neck, sending a shiver through his body as if an electric current had zapped through him. The terror of being suffocated to death enveloped him once more, a dangerous alarm bell ringing wildly in his mind.

If he were to refuse, would he once again suffer through that desperate near-stranglehold?

He clutched at the bedding, gazing at those wounds, and with great difficulty, forced a single word through clenched teeth: "...Fine."

Ming Fei Yu appeared to be in a good mood, leisurely combing through his hair, then hooking his chin, repeatedly admiring his face which flushed and paled alternately, and said with a smile, "Such a good boy."

"You have to clean up all the blood you drew with that knife, not a single drop left."