Chapter 108: The 108th Episode

Chapter 108

Eunuch Cui returned and relayed Lian Xiusheng's message. Lian Cheng, in front of the palace attendants, thought for a moment, loath to give up his golden goblets and jade flasks, grabbed two cushions and kicked one left and one right, "This is outrageous!"

Lai Qing and the others all went pale with fear, but Eunuch Cui stayed calm, "Your Majesty, shall we send someone to the Lian residence to give him twenty strokes to let off some steam?"

"..." Lian Cheng waved his hand, "In the future, I'll have to lean on the Grand Secretary's support. It wouldn't be fitting for me to punish him over every little thing, so I'll let it slide."

At noon, the Transmission Office delivered a joint memorial from the Heir of Prince Hui, Zhang Xian, and Lu Zhen, saying they had important matters to report. After reading it, Lian Cheng hurriedly got down from the daybed and had several palace attendants help him get dressed.

The emperor's attire was vastly different from what he had worn before. Though the style was not much different, every thread was worth its weight in gold. He put on a round-collar brocade robe with gold insect patterns, cloud motifs on the shoulders, and dragon trim on the sleeves, plus a gold filigree crown featuring two dragons chasing a pearl. Lian Cheng found it extravagant and said they should be more frugal in the future.

Lai Qing said with a laugh, "Young Lord Lian and Minister Xie of the Revenue Bureau have sorted through all the old items stored in the Imperial Inner Court and re-registered them. The clothes Your Majesty wears now were remade from the late Crown Prince's garments. It didn't cost much silver, only some labor."

Lian Cheng made an "oh" sound and walked while talking to Lai Qing, "Wouldn't people see that as unfilial and disloyal?"

Lai Qing: "They wouldn't dare."

So someone had already filed an impeachment complaint.

"Your Majesty need not worry. Young Lord Lian always has a plan for everything. He hasn't altered anything that shouldn't be altered. In these six months, the treasury has grown a lot more than before." In the past, the whole Inner Court used to be extravagantly wasteful, with annual expenses reaching two to three million taels—it was said more than three times what it was during the late emperor's time. But none of that silver ever reached lower-ranking attendants like Lai Qing; instead, they got squeezed even harder. Now, with Eunuch Cui reformed and working with Young Lord Lian to carry out a major crackdown on the Inner Court, even Lai Qing, a low-ranking eunuch whose main concern was his next meal, had benefited from the change of dynasty.

When they reached the hall in front of the Qianqing Palace where officials were received, Lai Qing announced that the emperor had arrived. Lian Cheng cleared his throat uncomfortably, left Lai Qing outside, and stepped into the hall.

The three men had already gotten up from their chairs. Seeing Lian Cheng, they all started to kneel in prostration.

Lian Cheng hurried over to stop them in time, "We've known each other since childhood. You all know we're not ones for all that ceremony. From now on, when we meet, a simple bow is enough."

Only then did Li Wan and the other two stop themselves from kneeling. After bowing with their hands clasped, they insisted Lian Cheng sit first, and only after he was seated did they take their seats.

Lian Cheng had a brief encounter with Li Wan at the city gate six months ago, but it had been over half a year since he'd seen Zhang Xian and Lu Zhen. Lu Zhen hadn't changed a bit, saying pleasant-sounding things that weren't so pleasant, "Shouldn't the Heir of Prince Hui now call you 'Imperial Brother'?" Zhang Xian quickly cut in, saying sworn brothers becoming in-laws was fate, pure fate.

Li Wan gave them both a dirty look, "A ruler is a ruler, and a subject is a subject. Your Majesty may call us brothers, but we can't take that literally—that would be a huge disrespect."

Lian Cheng burst out laughing and asked Zhang Xian, "Has Du Heng been acting so high and mighty lately?"

Lu Zhen said no, "It's only after entering the palace that he's like this. Perhaps being of royal birth, he's more hung up on etiquette than Siqi and me."

"Since when has he ever cared about etiquette?" Lian Cheng couldn't help laughing, though his smile soon faded. He looked at the three of them and said in a low voice, "I know what's on your minds, but no matter what, we're brothers, till the day we die."

Li Wan finally spoke, his tone a bit annoyed, "How can I not worry? Now that you're the emperor, for us to see you, we have to submit memorials to the Transmission Office. Those old men there even made fun of us, saying we were probably just trying to enter the palace to play with you. He approved it, but I'm still fuming."

Zhang Xian chuckled, "Du Heng can't take being disrespected, but I don't think it's a big deal. The courtiers don't share the relationship we have with Minzi, so asking a few extra questions is only natural. If we were too improper, they'd probably impeach Minzi for playing favorites and disrupting court order. You should think about Minzi's situation too."

Lu Zhen said quietly, "Not Minzi—Your Majesty."

Zhang Xian knelt with a flourish, "Your Majesty, forgive your subject's great disrespect!"

After some roughhousing, the atmosphere grew much more relaxed. They all sat on the daybed drinking tea. When Lai Qing came in to serve tea and snacks, his eyes nearly popped out. Lian Cheng told him not to speak of what he'd seen so as not to cause trouble, and Lai Qing nodded, of course, and closed the door behind him as he left.

After they'd each had a few sips of tea, Lian Cheng said slowly, "The land is safe, and old friends are still here. I hope we never drift apart."

Li Wan knew he had a point and sighed, "You all know my father is timid as a mouse. At first it might have been an act, but now the act has become real. Half a year ago, Third Uncle passed away, and recently Li Qing died too. Since then, Father hasn't dared leave his room—eating, drinking, and everything else, all in his room. He's afraid Lian Xiusheng will shoot him dead as well."

Lian Cheng gave a wry smile, "Why do you speak of my sixth brother as if he were a demon?"

The three of them looked at Lian Cheng with looks that said, "Isn't he?"

"But if Young Lord Lian weren't so fierce, Your Majesty might have long been thrown out of the palace by those sly old foxes. In any case, they don't care who sits on the throne—they only care about protecting their own interests." Lu Zhen said, "Thankfully, Crown Prince Jiao and Grand Secretary Cai still had some old loyalists scattered abroad. This time, all who could be useful returned to the capital and banded together, preventing those scheming old ministers from having their way."

Zhang Xian scoffed, "Their return is thanks to Your Majesty's luck. Who knows if they're any good."

"Good or bad, as long as they're useful, that's what matters," Lu Zhen said.

"Your Majesty, there's one more thing I need to talk to you about today." Zhang Xian silenced Lu Zhen and spoke to Lian Cheng very seriously.

Lian Cheng had a sinking feeling, "Speak."

"Grant me your aunt's hand in marriage!"

Lian Cheng groaned in dismay, "You're still hung up on my aunt?"

"I'm not the type to be wishy-washy," Zhang Xian flopped onto the couch and hugged Lian Cheng's calf, "I beg you, Your Majesty, take pity on me. I don't want high office or riches—I only want your aunt."

Li Wan couldn't stand seeing Lian Cheng being hugged and clung to by another man, so he lunged over to pull Zhang Xian off. Lu Zhen, being smaller, got squashed under the two taller men as they wrestled.

When Eunuch Cui came in with a fresh pot of tea, this is what he saw. He said softly, "Your Majesty shouldn't be horsing around with your ministers on the couch," then told Lu Zhen to get down first. Lu Zhen put on his shoes and hid behind Eunuch Cui like a quail.

Lian Cheng's dragon robe was a complete mess. He climbed to his feet, sat cross-legged, and said to Eunuch Cui, "Eunuch Cui, summon Huqiu. I want to leave the palace with the young lords for some fun."

Eunuch Cui shook his head, refusing, saying he must first report to the Empress Dowager, and only with her permission could it be done.

Lian Cheng: "But I'm the emperor!"

"The Empress Dowager anticipated Your Majesty would say that. She said if Your Majesty makes a scene, you may go to her in person and shout those words aloud," Eunuch Cui said.

Lian Cheng waved it off, "Mother has always doted on me. Why would she refuse? You're just using a chicken feather as a command arrow."

"I wouldn't dare."

Lian Cheng had no choice but to go find Zhang Ailian with a grumpy look, telling Zhang Xian and the others to wait in the hall.

The Empress Dowager was currently speaking with a senior palace lady. Seeing Lian Cheng arrive, she explained that this lady had been her sworn sister during their years together in the palace. The palace women were organized into six bureaus and one directorate, each bureau with four offices, making twenty-four offices in total, responsible for the clothing, food, lodging, and daily affairs of the emperor and the women of the palace. The matron was in charge of all these palace departments.

Lian Cheng called her "Auntie," then turned to Zhang Ailian and said he wanted to leave the palace. Zhang Ailian frowned, "You only woke up yesterday, and your body hasn't fully recovered. I've had the Imperial Astrologers pick an auspicious day—six days from now is a good one. I was hoping you'd rest well for two days and then have your coronation. What are you running off for again?"

Lian Cheng said he wanted to go home and visit his family.

Zhang Ailian couldn't talk him out of it, only insisting he bring plenty of personal guards and, above all, take Huqiu—that boy's strong enough to move mountains. She also warned him to be back before the palace gates were locked.

Lian Cheng agreed readily, gave a graceful bow, and ran off.

Matron He was left completely stunned, "The emperor's temperament is so much like the late Crown Prince's."

Zhang Ailian said with a helpless sigh, "Even more cunning and mischievous."

-

Lian Cheng changed into casual clothes and ran out of the palace with Li Wan and the others, bringing Huqiu along just like in the old days.

He still remembered Lian Xiusheng's words—what more did he want?

He'd already been given the iron certificate of immunity. What else could he possibly want?

"Let's just have some fun today. We can visit the Lian residence another day. It's been months since they've seen you—they'll surely make a big deal and put on a grand display. Without three to five hours, you wouldn't be able to escape," Zhang Xian said. "Better to save a whole day later to properly talk with them."

Lian Cheng thought Zhang Xian was right, but hesitated, "Still, I ticked off my sixth brother this morning. I need to go see him and ask him about it."

Li Wan asked worriedly, "Should we accompany you?"

"No need," Lian Cheng grabbed Huqiu and knocked on the side door, "I'll be quick."

The home was still the same home, one that Lian Cheng knew all too well. He figured home was best, then wondered if he should move the whole family into the palace. Along the way, he ran into no one—quite unlike the old days, when servants had swarmed around like clouds.

When they reached the hill, Lian Cheng pulled Huqiu aside. "Let's not make a sound."

Huqiu was puzzled. "Brother, you're being weird. We're already at the doorstep—why are we sneaking around like thieves?"

Lian Cheng suddenly felt wistful. "Thinking back, you and I really did sneak around like thieves back then."

"..."

Lian Cheng had a hunch. He suspected Lian Xiusheng was up to something again, maybe sulking in his room right now. Once he went over, confirmed it, and had a chat with him to draw out his thoughts, he could go off and enjoy himself with an easy mind.

As he entered, Lian Cheng paused curiously under the sal tree. He looked up and saw only half-bare branches. Lian Xiusheng claimed he could see, beneath this tree, how he had lived in the modern world—creepy, really creepy.

So Lian Cheng couldn't resist. He walked over, circled the tree, and bothered it thoroughly, yet sensed nothing. Strange, really strange—though maybe it was because Lian Xiusheng had lived here the longest, and they shared a deeper bond.

Everything was settled now, and Lian Cheng wasn't one to borrow trouble. Nothing there, so nothing there—he walked off quickly and made his way to the window of the tea room in the courtyard.

Voices came from the tea room. Lian Cheng didn't barge straight in but crouched by the window, peering in secretly.

Lian Xiusheng had a guest. It took Lian Cheng a lot of effort to see through the gap that it was Xie Lanjin and his son Xie Qia—father and son. The three were chatting over tea, discussing the tune "The Swallow Alights on the Victory Command," having a great time. Lian Cheng listened for a while, watched Lian Xiusheng's mouth never close once, clicked his tongue, then turned and ran off.

Lian Cheng brought Huqiu along and met up with Li Wan and the others outside. They took a carriage to a tavern in an alley where refined gentlemen hung out.

Li Wan got a private booth and called for two singing girls to perform. Once they were deep inside the tavern, the girls started strumming and singing. Drinking alone was boring, so the four of them—skipping word games and drinking forfeits—set up a table with tea, wine, and fine snacks around it, and started yelling over a game of leaf cards.

Lian Cheng didn't know how to play leaf cards and lost at first. Since none of the young gentlemen were short on coin, they didn't wager money—the loser drank instead, to avoid any talk of them being idle wastrels. After all, Li Wan and the others were now the emperor's own face.

Lian Cheng, losing from the start, downed an entire pot of Jinhua wine. Given that his health wasn't fully recovered, the penalty would otherwise have been three pots, but even with all three going easy on him, he still cried out "No, no!" and switched the Jinhua wine for pear wine. Once he'd switched to fruit wine, not only did he learn the game, but his luck turned as well.

Li Wan played a thirty-thousand string, and he could throw down a fifty-thousand; Zhang Xian played a five-bamboo, and he had a six-bamboo; Lu Zhen, after much effort, managed a ten-million, and he slapped down a hundred-million. Even when the three, taking advantage of Lian Cheng's half-drunkenness, secretly swapped cards under the table to scrape together a straight, Lian Cheng raised his hand and tossed out a leopard.

"Minzi, are you cheating?" Zhang Xian stood up, searching above and below the table, turning Lian Cheng's hands over and over. Finding nothing, he sat back down.

Lian Cheng hiccupped, his vision swimming. It had been a long time since he'd had this much fun. He truly wanted to discuss with Lian Xiusheng the idea of making Huqiu the emperor—with Huqiu's stature, once he sat on the dragon throne, the hundred officials wouldn't dare utter a single word.

In his daze, he played a card, and heard the three of them cheer together: "Minzi lost! Drink, drink!"

Minzi lost, Minzi stepped down, Minzi drank—and Minzi never won again.

The song had stopped at some point, perhaps nearing the curfew hour. The four of them, mouths askew and eyes crossed, were still determined to beat each other into submission. Such is life—sad in old age with grandchildren aplenty, joyful in youth with mischief to spare.

Huqiu, with two imperial guards, stood watch beneath the moon-gate outside the booth. Even the waiters couldn't get in; the wine and fruit were all brought in by them.

But this visitor was no ordinary one. The man wore a black straight robe with a white-crane overshirt; in the darkness, only the woven golden cranes seemed to dance. Only as he drew closer did his full form come into view.

"Young Lord Lian." The two guards offered their salutes, and Huqiu softly called out "Sixth Brother," his heart inexplicably uneasy.

"When did you leave?" Lian Xiusheng asked Huqiu.

"After noon."

Lian Xiusheng: "You've been out three or four hours now. When do you plan to return to the palace?"

This was someone coming to fetch them. Huqiu's courage quailed, and he said they'd return at once.

The words had barely left his mouth when Zhang Xian's shout rang out: "I won again! Minzi, drink!"

Lian Xiusheng's brow furrowed slightly. He stepped around Huqiu and strode straight toward the direction of their ruckus. The three dared not block him, only scrambling to follow behind.

He pushed open the door. Inside, the four were already oblivious to heaven and earth, not stopping their revelry. Lian Xiusheng paid the other three no mind—his eyes landed at once on Lian Cheng. His good third brother, his good emperor, was at this very moment nestled in Lu Zhen's arms, cheek tilted in a jade-like lean, eyes trailing silken threads, while Zhang Xian, legs spread wide, held his face and poured wine into his mouth.

Lian Xiusheng rarely showed a dark face, but now he did. He unfastened his cloak, strode over, grabbed Lu Zhen, and tossed him aside. Then he snatched Lian Cheng into his arms. Lian Cheng, ever quick-witted, the moment he was free, grabbed a wine jug and shoved its spout into Li Wan's mouth, pouring hard. Lian Xiusheng seized the jug, hurled it away, and swept Lian Cheng up horizontally, pinning him so he couldn't move. As he left, he tossed back a cold remark: "Li Wan, Zhang Xian, Lu Zhen—you have fawned upon your sovereign, luring the emperor into wine and women, roaming the streets, suspected of beguiling the ruler's heart. Each of you shall receive fifty lashes."