Chapter 200 Compensate Me

Chapter 200: You Owe Me a Wife

Zhou Yinyun stared at him, enunciating each word: "Now she's gone, Cheng Muyu—you owe me a wife."

Cheng Ge: "??????"

I haven't even got a wife myself! The hell am I supposed to give you? A hammer?!

Cheng Ge looked at his brother, whose gaze was fixated and seemed to be teetering on the brink of exploding.

He swallowed hard, his mind racing as he tried to find a solution. He stammered.

"Well... what about... I ask Sister Lvrou? See if she'd be willing to... marry you?"

But before he could finish, a sudden force yanked him forward—Zhou Yinyun had grabbed him and yanked him close.

His waist was instantly locked in Zhou Yinyun's arms, their bodies nearly pressed together.

Cheng Ge: "???"

Zhou Yinyun's low, suppressed voice slammed into his ear: "Since you tricked me into thinking you were Caicai—

Then you make it up to me. Come back with me now and be my princess consort."

Cheng Ge's eyes nearly popped out. He thought his ears were playing tricks on him, that the world had gone completely insane.

Without a second thought, he shoved Zhou Yinyun away, his voice cracking.

"Zhou Yinyun, what the fuck is wrong with you?! I'm a man! What the hell are you talking about?!"

Zhou Yinyun staggered back a step from the push, steadied himself, but his eyes grew even more stubborn as he closed in on Cheng Ge again.

"I don't care. You lied to me first. You're coming back with me to get married!"

Cheng Ge felt his palms itch, a sudden urge to beat the shit out of the other man.

He lifted his head, his eyes dark enough to drip water, and demanded sharply, "Your Highness, do you actually like men?!"

Zhou Yinyun faltered at the question. Like men? He had never considered it before—

The one he liked was always the Caicai who haunted his dreams. And Caicai was Cheng Ge.

He watched Cheng Ge's face, vivid with anger, and blurted out without thinking, "I... I like you."

Cheng Ge: "..."

Cheng Ge was completely speechless, almost laughing at this ridiculous logic.

"Two men getting married—what kind of nonsense is that?! Even if I were crazy enough to agree, wouldn't the prince come after me with a cleaver and chop me into mincemeat?!"

Zhou Yinyun looked at him, flustered and furious, and was silent for a moment.

Then he offered a solution that scared the living daylights out of Cheng Ge: "You could... dress up as a woman and marry me."

Cheng Ge: "!!!"

Mad! Completely mad! Terrified out of his wits, Cheng Ge's last shred of sanity snapped!

Without a second thought, he jumped up and socked Zhou Yinyun in the chest. As the other recoiled in pain, Cheng Ge darted through the mansion gate like a bullet!

While running for his life, he screamed at the top of his lungs:

"Shut the gate! Hurry! Let Dahuang out! Let Dahuang out!"

…

Cheng Ge burst into his room, slammed the door shut behind him, and leaned against it, panting heavily, his heart pounding like a drum.

He wiped cold sweat from his forehead—though there was none—and muttered with blank eyes.

"Damn... too damn weird... Zhou Zhan was like this, and now Zhou Yinyun... What kind of twisted love curse is this? I've stumbled into a freaking gay den?!"

The more he thought, the more creeped out he got, and he shuddered violently. "Could some damn bastard have cursed me? Attracting nothing but rotten love—and fucking male ones at that?!"

His perfectly good brothers, one after another, bending out of nowhere—how the hell was he supposed to deal with this?!

Cheng Ge rushed to the wardrobe, yanked the door open, and started frantically pulling things out.

Valuable jade pendants, his stash of silver notes, some decent clothes...

He didn't even look, just threw everything onto the bundle spread out on the bed.

Lü Rou, who had been trimming flower branches under the eaves, heard the racket and poked her head in to check on him.

As she entered, she saw Cheng Ge half-inside the wardrobe, his butt stuck out, frantically digging around.

He looked just like Dahuang digging a mouse hole out of Star Frost's stall…

"Young master?" Lü Rou asked softly. "What are you doing? Are you looking for something? Let me help."

Cheng Ge heard her voice and pulled his head out of the wardrobe, his hair mussed and his face still pale with panic.

He grabbed her wrist, urging, "Lvrou-jie, perfect timing! Pack your stuff—we're leaving tonight... no, now! Right this second!"

Lü Rou was taken aback by his sudden outburst. She looked at the messy pile of valuables on the bed. "Leaving? Young master, where are we going?"

Without thinking, Cheng Ge blurted out, "I'm retiring and going home! This crappy official job can go to hell! I'm done!"

Lü Rou: "???"

She stared at him in silence, saw he wasn't joking, though she didn't know what had happened, she didn't press.

Instead, she stepped forward and quietly began to fold the clothes he had scattered everywhere.

Wherever Cheng Ge went, she would follow. There was nothing to think twice about.

She placed a folded robe into the bundle, looked up at him, and asked practically.

"Young master, what countryside do you plan to hide out in? The old family estate in Yuanzhou?"

The question hit Cheng Ge like a brick. Right... where?

His age alone made "retirement" absurd. Was he really going to slink back to the Yuanzhou estate and mooch off his parents?

Although the original owner's useless father was only a minor official, he still cared about face.

Other people's sons serving as officials in the capital bring glory to their ancestors; if he slinks back in disgrace, what does that make him?

Wouldn't that be grinding the old man's face into the dirt?

Cheng Ge scratched his head, paced irritably in the room, and suddenly his eyes lit up.

"Forget Yuanzhou, we can go to Cui Ji! Yes! Go find Cui Ji—he will definitely take us in."

Luckily, he still had his good buddy Cui Ji, otherwise these gay guys would have been the death of him.

When they got to the border, he'd have Cui Ji's manly aura fend off his bad romantic luck. His chastity must be protected.

Lü Rou nodded, having no objection to this destination, and continued packing, her head bowed.

She asked casually, her voice soft: "And... has His Majesty approved your resignation petition?"

Cheng Ge: "!!! No way!"

As if a basin of ice water had been poured over his head, Cheng Ge froze on the spot, completely petrified.

Damn! He forgot this point—this isn't modern times, where you can just pack up your water bottle and walk out.

This is an ancient era where Imperial Authority is supreme. For an official to resign, they have to go through a ridiculously long and strict process: they must submit a memorial stating their case and wait for the emperor's approval.

If he dared to run away without submitting a memorial... that would be dereliction of duty, a huge show of contempt for Imperial Authority.

At best, he would be stripped of his position and beaten with court canes until his butt was shredded; at worst, he would be thrown in jail and interrogated, possibly even implicating his family.