Chapter 131 Torment: Truly ill, gravely so.

Chapter 131: Condemning the Heart: He was really sick, badly sick.

That day, clouds covered the sun, and a vast expanse of gloomy skies stretched for miles. News spread through every street and alley that Yu Xianqiu, the lady of the Xie family, had jumped into a river and drowned.

Tormented by illness and had a mental breakdown, Yu Xianqiu took her own life, leaving behind a divorce letter. Xie Tanwei became a widower. The once-admired model couple, the envy of all, were now separated by life and death, their once-legendary love story lay in ruins.

Though they were already divorced, Xie Tanwei, as a leading Confucian scholar, still observed the rites for a deceased wife, putting on funeral robes. He had her remains, nibbled by fish in the spring waters, retrieved from the water, dressed her in dignified burial clothes, and kept vigil for three days to express his grief, before burying her in the Xie family ancestral grave.

"I choose the second option—I abandon you, and you, pining for me, can never have me. I’m vain and love being admired. In the past, I boasted to the noble ladies about how much my husband loved me, and that lie can’t be exposed."

That was what Xian Qiu had said in life.

"Moreover, after I die, I want to be buried in the Xie ancestral grave, and in a hundred years, to be buried together in a grand ceremony with you."

Even in the illusory realm of the dead, she wanted him to love her.

Xie Tanwei agreed to her request.

But he only agreed to the first half.

As for the grand joint burial, it all depended on whether Xie Tanwei took a new wife in the years to come. If he did marry a legitimate successor who was recorded in the clan register, he would naturally be buried with her, and Xian Qiu would have no share.

After many years of marriage, it all turned to ashes in an instant.

The cool spring rain fell, sometimes dense, sometimes sparse.

The wind occasionally shattered the raindrops, and leaves rustled faintly against each other. The sound of rain dripping from the eaves, a thin, hazy mist shrouded the streets and lanes. Distant mountains in the mist, brimming spring waters, strands of icy silk mixed with raindrops clung to her cheeks.

Xian Qiu was buried, and paper money was scattered all over the streets, adding a sense of gloom to the already damp, rainy day. Funeral music drifted through the air, the paper money stuck to the ground, soaked by the rain, and trampled into mud by passersby.

Tian Qin pushed open the window, and gusts of cold wind lifted her skirt and stray locks of hair, shocking her senses awake.

A layer of frost clung to her eyebrows, the chill seeping into her very bones. She shivered, involuntarily hugging her arms and cowering.

A pair of arms, colder than the rain and wind, wrapped around her from behind. A deep voice echoed like the rustling of a pine forest on a snowy night:

"The wind is cold. Close the window."

Tian Qin was forced to lean against his tall, imposing chest, her teeth chattering as she sought warmth.

Xie Tanwei was dressed in white mourning robes, his loose black hair adorned with a single white flower, a perfect image of a widower. Yet his hand reached into her skirt, committing the most transgressive act.

She grabbed his wrist just in time, resisting with a serious demeanor: "Your wife has just passed away. You should keep your hands off for a few days."

"Today is the seventh day after her death. I've already observed seven days of abstinence."

Xie Tanwei adjusted his posture, opening his arms, looking gentle and warm, trapping her in a small corner by the window. Raindrops almost dampened the gauze of her skirt. "Besides, weren't you hoping for her death? Why mourn for her?"

Tian Qin turned her head away indifferently: "I'm not mourning for her."

"Then what are you so sad about?" He wiped away what might have been tears or raindrops from her cheek.

"I'm grieving for myself. Now that she's gone, I no longer have any excuse to escape from your side. Isn't that right?"

She stood there, resolute and defiant in the biting cold of early spring.

Xie Tanwei, like a ghostly figure, smiled faintly and nodded: "Indeed."

From this moment on, the title 'brother-in-law' was history now, and no moral or legal restraints bound their relationship. He had the right to unleash the most primal, savage side of a man upon her, and as a woman, she had no choice but to take it.

Li Fu was dead. Xian Qiu was dead. Now, all her enemies in this world were dead, except for him. She could enjoy life comfortably and freely. She forgave him for not being able to hand over his own life just yet, because without his life, he could not have her; therefore, he had to cling to it, fearing death.

Tian Qin pushed him away and walked off, not even trying to hide her disgust.

Xie Tanwei's hand hung in the air, suddenly chilled by her icy expression.

He had thought that with Xian Qiu's death, their relationship might improve. It turned out that this was his punishment—no matter what he did, he could never earn her understanding or forgiveness. He was imprisoned in the dungeon of her heart, serving his whole sentence, condemned to death, with no hope of parole.

He couldn't help but laugh bitterly, half sorrowful, half joyful, comforting himself, telling himself that the heart didn't matter, that as long as her body was within reach, that was enough.

But in the end, it was self-deception.

Facing her day in and day out, it was impossible for him not to crave her heart, not to yearn for her undivided love.

He could only ever rely on violence and power to keep someone who didn't love him by his side, trapping himself in a self-made prison.

The room went dead silent, like a wake.

From the other chambers of the pleasure quarters, faint sounds of singing, dancing, and partying drifted in through the door, indistinct, as if belonging to a different world compared to their silence.

Xie Tanwei had sent her here to tame her, but instead, he was the one being tamed, tangled in his own trap.

The rain grew heavier, the spring chill deepened. Xie Tanwei stood by the window, his dark silhouette softened by the faint light of the pale blue sky in the rain, a profound, lingering sadness that would not disperse.

After a long while, he shook himself out of it and, in a voice that mixed pleading and ordering, said:

"Come here and kiss me."

He had always wanted her to take the initiative, to treat him normally.

Tian Qin pretended he wasn't there.

This was not the first time she had disregarded his demands. Her expression was a disdainful sneer, like he was garbage. She'd rather die than give in to him.

Xie Tanwei felt a pain he couldn't put into words, and after a moment of silent loneliness, his handsome face, wet with rain, turned even more pale. He gazed into the distance at the misty rain shrouding the capital, blocked by mountains, the world outside his heart already blurred into one.

Though he could not win her heart, he had her body, didn't he?

...But in truth, he could have her heart too.

All he had to do was activate the Love Gu.

The more she rejected him, the more his intricate threads of love multiplied like countless ripples stirred by the rain, growing ever more distorted.

But he didn't want to use the Love Gu to get a fake kind of love. He wanted her to depend on him as she depended on other men, to have her love him back honestly. He cared more and more about what she really thought of him deep inside.

He was really sick, badly sick.

...

Time flowed like water, a life of wine and women, the splendor of the world.

The all-night party at Drunken Years was filled with the sounds of strings and pipes, laughter and joy. The warm candlelight made everything feel even more decadent, immersing everyone in a sea of pleasure, forgetting troubles and regrets.

Here, men and women cast aside the shackles of propriety and morality, shedding their fancy clothes, letting loose in wild revelry, hugging beautiful girls, passion flaring up over and over.

Tian Qin was now allowed to roam around the three-story pavilion, as long as she harbored no thoughts of escape. The other girls knew she was easygoing, generous, a good loser at dice, daring in love and hate, and a heavy drinker. Coupled with her status as the top courtesan and her stunning beauty, she could attract a crowd of free-spending patrons. So everyone was happy to gather around her, treating her like the moon surrounded by stars.

A jug of wine, its clear, fiery liquid flowing smoothly. Tian Qin smiled, opened her mouth, and amidst the crowd's cheers, let the wine cascade down her throat, drinking like it meant something, as if the wine became even more intoxicating because of her.

“Excellent! Excellent! Miss Yingge can really hold her liquor!”

The onlookers at the table shouted as banknotes flew in like a blizzard.

“Miss Yingge, have another cup! I’ve got plenty of silver, my dear!”

“Miss Yingge, dance for us!”

The atmosphere was heated, like popcorn popping in a hot pan, making everyone sweat profusely.

Tian Qin accepted everything with an even brighter smile.

She wore a pure white pleated dress, looking like a divine goddess under the flickering candlelight, every smile and frown radiating a pure and coquettish charm that captivated hearts, making men willing to die for her.

Though she had a moon-like, aloof temperament, she also possessed the dazzling brilliance of the sun—a sunflower, a spring blossom, or even the sun incarnate.

The young lady who once threw up at the slightest sip of alcohol could now drink a thousand cups without getting drunk.

“This cup of wine is the last one tonight, and I will only drink it with the man who loves me most, feeding it to him myself.”

She muttered fussily, her tone clear, mischievously wild, and seductive, as she filled a large cup and lazily scanned the infatuated guests, “Who will it be?”

The scene suddenly erupted into chaos, thousands of voices mingling into a deafening roar, and several patrons came to blows over her.

Liu Ruyan, hiding behind the curtain counting banknotes, felt her heart bleed.

What should she do? Miss Yingge is the master’s exclusive plaything, and they were ordered to keep an eye on her. If the master finds out Miss Yingge is drinking with other men and the scene is so heated, he will surely flay her alive.

But... Liu Ruyan kissed the banknotes in her hands longingly. The business was too good—Miss Yingge had brought immense wealth to Drunken Flow. How could she argue with silver and stop Miss Yingge?

Liu Ruyan earned rivers of silver while trembling in fear, constantly alert to any movement outside, every slight breeze making her hair stand on end, as if walking on the edge of a cliff.

Liu Ruyan ordered Yu Zhu, “Go keep an eye on her. Take several capable men with you. Watch her like a hawk. Only drinking and chatting are allowed—nothing beyond that. Don't let any dirty man even touch the hem of Yingge’s skirt, and don't let anyone stay overnight! Anyone who disobeys, kick them out no matter how much silver they offer.”

This was supposed to be a pleasure house, where such things were natural and expected. Yet from the mouth of a brothel madam, the word “transgress” carried a forced seriousness and a strange, untimely absurdity.

But that man’s authority was so terrifying, suffocating her, capable of destroying Drunken Flow with a wave of his hand. Liu Ruyan would rather lose money than risk her own life and property.

Yu Zhu understood the severity and nodded in agreement.

Liu Ruyan counted banknotes until her fingers cramped. The money-grubber suddenly felt that money didn’t smell as sweet; it even tasted bitter.

It was already late at night, yet the scene remained hot and sweaty.

Tian Qin finally chose a fifty-year-old merchant—a mason he had hired. The man had originally been serving his master, fixing leaks in his house, but had followed the merchant here because the merchant was drawn to Drunken Flow. Her reason: the mason was rough, dark-skinned, and muscular, not like her brother-in-law, and she liked that.

“Oh, the top courtesan has a brother-in-law?”

“Who has the fortune to be the top courtesan’s brother-in-law?”

“Tell us, who is the brother-in-law?”

“What kind of brother-in-law makes Miss Yingge miss him so much—real or fake?”

...

The scene erupted once more, laughter mixed with alcohol fumes almost splitting eardrums, frivolous words drifting like snowflakes into their ears.

Liu Ruyan, listening nearby, felt her heart crack too.

Good heavens, stop talking! She dares to mention anyone.

Upon hearing this, Yu Zhu quickly pulled at Tian Qin’s sleeve, but the latter, too drunk, responded slowly and ignored her completely.

“My brother-in-law is the man I love most. What do you know?” Tian Qin laughed brightly, her eyes pure with drunkenness, hiccupping, swaying, and burping out bubbly words, “None of you can compare to my brother-in-law. You’re all useless, save your breath.”

None of the male guests accepted this. More banknotes flew in. Men hate being called useless—the more useless they are, the more they want to prove themselves.

The hapless mason Tian Qin had chosen was pushed onto the table, deemed lucky to drink with her.

The mason was trembling, unable to hold his cup steady. He had just followed his master on a job; how did he end up being favored by the city’s most beautiful courtesan? He had a wife and a four-year-old son at home.

He was scared out of his wits.

But... he swallowed hard. The top courtesan was breathtakingly beautiful. Like an insignificant ant, he wouldn't even be allowed to set foot in this luxurious den on a normal day. How fortunate he was to drink with her, earning the envy of all these powerful and wealthy patrons.

As he thought about it, he felt proud and puffed out his chest. Amidst the roaring cheers that numbed his nerves, he drank and couldn’t help daydreaming about spending the night for free.

The top courtesan giving herself to him...

The top courtesan set on him...

It wasn’t his fault.

Tian Qin drained the cup, wiped the wine stains from her lips, tugged at the mason’s sleeve, and said playfully in a sweet voice, “You drank the best of anyone tonight. I’ve fallen in love with you.”