Chapter 83: Envy

Chapter 83 Jealousy

The night was cool as still water.

Pei Du lay alone in bed, and everywhere his gaze fell were scenes that held memories of him and Chu Lanting.

His chest began to feel tight again.

The fingers of both hands resting on the blanket curled into fists. Just as he was about to turn over and lie flat, his peripheral vision unconsciously landed on the pillow beside him.

A voice in his mind told him to stay calm—as a Major General, he should not be trapped by matters of the heart, lest he leave a ticking time bomb in himself that could go off at any moment.

But another voice urged him to pull the pillow into his arms.

Chu Lanting was his, after all. They were already legally married, and even the military doctor had advised him to find a mental-bond partner to help stabilize his volatile mental energy.

This way, it would not only benefit himself—once his mental energy stabilized, it would also help ensure the safety of everyone in the Aland star system.

Two voices argued in his mind, neither gaining the upper hand.

They made Pei Du's already pounding head throb even harder.

Just then, a faint jasmine fragrance drifted to his nose. The cool, refreshing scent eased his headache considerably.

It also made his gaze fix on the pillow beside him.

Chu Lanting was still busy; he probably wouldn't come in anytime soon.

He only wanted to ease the chaos in his mental energy, only wanted to hold it for a little while...

Only when he pulled the pillow into his arms and buried his face in its softness did Pei Du's furrowed brow finally relax.

His nose was filled with the scent of jasmine. This small, pure white flower was also grown by some on the main planet, but because it wasn't as vividly colorful as other flowers, jasmine didn't stand out.

Just like Chu Lanting himself—unremarkable as jasmine, yet he insisted on blooming, spreading his faint fragrance outward.

The floral scent filled his nose again. Pei Du tightened his arms around the pillow, but as he shifted his arm up, he touched something hard that wasn't the soft pillow—something like a stack of paper...

When Chu Lanting looked up from his lesson plans, it was already quite late.

He stood and stretched. His right hand was sore from writing too long, so he shook his arm out until his whole body relaxed. Only then did he stop and glance at the door, which wasn't fully closed.

A few hours earlier, he had told Pei Du to rest first while he stayed in the living room to keep preparing his lessons.

Call him diligent and responsible, or call him a coward running from reality—he'd nod and admit to either.

Three days was too short. With his return date uncertain, there was so little he could leave the children.

He was afraid that once he returned from the main planet, the good habits he'd worked so hard to instill in the children would have faded away.

But he could take leave to handle all of that.

The real reason he'd told Pei Du to rest first was that he didn't dare face him directly.

The heart is flesh and blood.

He was no different.

Whenever he thought about how the A Du who loved him and treated him well would never come back, his heart would ache with sharp, throbbing pain.

He deliberately numbed himself with work, deliberately avoided thinking about the past.

Chu Lanting thought of himself as a coward.

It was already very late, and even cowards needed rest.

Just as he was thinking about spending the night at the dining table, he pushed open the door to grab his blanket—and heard a voice in the dim room that was all too familiar.

"All done with work?"

"Ah?! Yeah... why aren't you asleep yet?"

The fact that Pei Du was still awake startled Chu Lanting. His fingers tightened around the doorknob as he stood frozen in the doorway, staring at the expanded wooden bed.

He saw Pei Du rub the bridge of his nose, his voice hoarse as he said, "I was asleep."

"Did I wake you, then? Sorry, I just came in to grab a blanket."

The temperature on Planet 207 dropped quite low at night, and without a blanket, it was easy to catch cold.

Stepping into the room, Chu Lanting approached the bed—and saw Pei Du, who had been lying down, suddenly sit up.

Assuming he was heading to the bathroom, Chu Lanting only blinked in belated realization when he saw him bend down to pick up the blanket and pillow from the bed.

"You..."

"You've had a long day—you should rest in bed. I'll go sleep outside."

His thoughts seen through, a flustered expression immediately appeared on Chu Lanting's face: "No, you're unwell."

"I—I won't take the blanket. Let's sleep together."

The wooden bed was already large enough. Back then, A Du had specially learned from a carpenter to rebuild it, originally meant for the couple to mess around on freely.

But now, this bed separated them.

In the dim room, Pei Du turned to look at Chu Lanting, who was facing away, pressing his whole body against the wall as if desperate to put as much distance as possible between them.

In those dark eyes, an emotion called jealousy surfaced.

Yes, jealousy.

After only half a day with Chu Lanting, Pei Du had realized what the stifling feeling in his chest truly was.

It was jealousy.

In the past, he had rarely been able to perceive emotions. His daily life was simple—besides going to the battlefield, he coordinated training.

After training, he went home to read books and official documents to pass the time.

Beyond that, occasional interviews and reports also took up his time.

He could sense emotions in others that were different from his own flat, unruffled state.

But back then, he couldn't understand.

Now he understood.

When he heard Chu Lanting call out 'A Du,' when he saw the grief and longing in Chu Lanting's eyes.

When he felt a sense of distance from Chu Lanting, and when he discovered beneath Chu Lanting's pillow a diary titled 'A Du's Diary' that chronicled the happy life the two of them shared, at that moment he almost couldn't control himself, letting his chaotic mental energy fully consume him and do a series of things he'd regret.

Fortunately, he managed to restrain himself.

He thought of a word he'd learned as a child: jealousy.

He was jealous of A Du, and even more so of the kindness Chu Lanting showed him.

His head, already throbbing, ached even worse, until the sound of footsteps outside the door snapped him back to reality.

Reading between the lines of what Chu Lanting said, the first thought that jumped into his mind was to get him to stay.

Chu Lanting was truly exhausted; he fell asleep shortly after lying down.

He slept peacefully, hands resting on his abdomen, legs lying straight, but perhaps because he was missing someone's koala-like embrace, he frowned in his sleep, uncomfortable.

Hearing the deep, even breaths beside him, Pei Du shifted his stiff body, turned to the side, and reached out his hand.

Fingers with light calluses tentatively touched the hands resting on his abdomen.

When the person beside him didn't react, Pei Du breathed a small sigh of relief.

Then, realizing what he was doing, he immediately set his mouth in a firm line, yet he didn't withdraw his hand—instead, he placed his palm over the back of those hands...