Chapter 46

Chapter 46

Truth be told, prying the pearl from the King Cobra’s fangs still made Chen Ji a little nervous. Both were deadly beasts, capable of killing or severely injuring with a single bite. Yet, he’d directly handled the White Tiger Grandpa’s pearls even when they weren't familiar. With the King Cobra, Chen Ji only dared to use a straw to dislodge it.

The soft, chewy pearl dropped from the crescent-shaped fang and swiftly slid down the King Cobra’s throat. Chen Ji froze, thinking, "Oh no, I hope it doesn't go down the wrong pipe." The thought flashed and faded, and he chuckled to himself—this was a snake! What windpipe?

“All done.” Chen Ji tossed the straw into the cup. The King Cobra slowly lowered its head, a hint of regret in its tone: “What… taste… I didn’t… taste it…”

Chen Ji smiled and explained, “It’s sweet, but not much flavor, just a hint of grain.”

“Hmm…” The King Cobra hummed softly. Suddenly, Second Master Huang called out, “Chen Ji! Over here!”

Chen Ji nodded to the King Cobra and turned towards Second Master Huang, who had already cleared half the hillside, his bamboo basket brimming. Second Master Huang grumbled, “Is this enough?”

The moment Chen Ji touched the basket, the system notification chimed: “Congratulations, Chen Ji. The completion rate for the task ‘Collect Herbs’ has increased to 60%. Keep up the good work.”

“It’s enough, Second Grandpa. You’ve worked hard.” Chen Ji smiled at Second Master Huang.

Second Master Huang casually tossed the sickle into the basket. Its petite true form, a stark contrast to its Dharma Form, leaped onto Chen Ji’s shoulder, its slender body wrapping around his neck. Perched there, it sighed deeply, “This stuff isn’t tasty or useful. I don’t know why you want it…”

Chen Ji patted Second Master Huang and bid farewell to the King Cobra before heading deeper into the back hills. Once they were out of the woods, Second Master Huang remarked, “Old Five is a good fellow. If you ever run into trouble in this valley, just call him for help.”

It paused, then added with a teasing inflection, “Oh… but not for emergencies. For emergencies, call me. By the time he crawls over, you’d probably have already crossed the Naihe Bridge and finished your Mengpo Soup.”

“Second Grandpa.” Chen Ji smiled knowingly, more interested in something else. “Are there really a Naihe Bridge and Mengpo Soup?”

“Of course.” Second Master Huang’s tail swished back and forth on Chen Ji’s back, causing a slight tickle. It said lazily, “When people die, they go to the underworld. Of course, all the usual things are there. Not just the underworld, but also Ox-Head and Horse-Face, Black and White Impermanence. I’ll introduce you sometime.”

As Chen Ji listened, he suddenly asked, “What if someone dies abroad?”

Second Master Huang hesitated for a moment before replying, “What else? We handle them the same way! There are offices over there, like embassies. If it’s not urgent, they wait until enough people have gathered and ship them back in batches…”

“What if it’s urgent?” Chen Ji asked, intrigued—Second Master Huang even knew about embassies.

“Urgent? Then they charter a flight back!” Second Master Huang said nonchalantly. “But no sneaking around illegally. If it’s urgent, they just complete the paperwork and take the fastest flight available.”

Chen Ji chuckled. “I wonder how Brother Zhang is doing over in the US.”

“Then give him a call. It’s not like it’s classified information.” Second Master Huang swiped Chen Ji’s phone with its tail, brushed it against Chen Ji’s face, and with a flash, dialed Zhang Cheng’s video call. The call rang for a long time without an answer. Just as it was about to hang up automatically, two blood-red eyes suddenly appeared on the screen.

They were sinister, gleaming with bloodthirsty light, staring straight at the screen. The red-clad Zhang Cheng’s face also bore a few drops of blood, like dark, dramatic makeup.

Second Master Huang immediately boomed, “Brother! How’s it going over there? I’ve been thinking about you! When are you coming back? I’ll whip you up a welcome feast!”

Zhang Cheng suddenly grinned, his body shifting slightly. A scream echoed from off-screen. Second Master Huang remarked, “Busy, huh?”

“Busy.” Zhang Cheng nodded, brushing aside a stray lock of hair. His hand was stained with splotches of bright red blood. “Wanna see?”

“Hell no!” Second Master Huang flicked its tail. “Come on, Chen Ji, say hi to your Brother Zhang… You go ahead and handle your business. We’ll talk later. Bye!”

Before Chen Ji could even utter “Brother Zhang,” Second Master Huang ended the call. It stuffed the phone back into Chen Ji’s hand. “Kids shouldn’t watch that kind of stuff. You might scare the soul right out of you, and I’d have to fish your soul back!”

Chen Ji checked the time. It was almost noon here, which meant it was around 1 a.m. in the U.S. Chen Ji remarked, “Brother Zhang gets an early start.”

Didn’t people usually do these things around 3 or 4 a.m.?

“Tsk.” Second Master Huang explained, “Most prefer the wee hours—it’s more exciting. But your Brother Zhang’s situation is different. It’s a grudge written in blood… He’ll probably be back soon.”

Hearing this, Chen Ji sent Zhang Cheng a message with the details of a pre-arranged courier service. He planned to pack his token and drop it off at the delivery station later.

Second Master Huang snickered when it saw this. “You’re quite thorough, kid.”

Chen Ji gave a light squeeze to Second Master Huang’s paw. The pink paw pads felt exceptionally great to the touch. Second Master Huang let him do as he pleased. After chatting for a bit, they arrived at the flat platform where Chen Ji often rested. The area had plenty of water plants, so Chen Ji said, “Second Grandpa, why don’t you rest? I’ll go gather some calamus and mugwort.”

Second Master Huang leaped off Chen Ji’s shoulder and said disdainfully, “Do you even know what they look like anyway? Go play somewhere else… The Sweet Dragon Bamboo shoots are sprouting over there. Go pick some, and tonight you can cook a feast for your Second Grandpa.”

Chen Ji naturally agreed.

The 2.8-meter-tall weasel picked up Chen Ji’s sickle and dashed toward the water’s edge. Chen Ji, meanwhile, slowly made his way to the bamboo grove, taking out his second sickle to search around. It had been a while since his last visit, and he noticed many new bamboo shoots that had grown two to three meters tall. Chen Ji stroked the green bamboo stalks, feeling tempted—maybe he could cut one down to make bamboo rice?

Not to boast, but bamboo rice was both simple and delicious. You could add cured meat, sausages, vegetables—pretty much anything you had at home. Stuff the bamboo tube, steam it, and it was ready to eat. The fragrant, light flavor was perfect, and Chen Ji could easily devour three bowls.

You could also keep it simple and just use glutinous rice. If prepared that way, Chen Ji preferred packing the rice tightly, giving it a texture similar to rice cakes. It tasted great with sugar or soy sauce—pretty much anything except shoe soles.

No time like the present.

Even though it was new bamboo, the stalks were thick and flexible, about the width of Chen Ji’s two hands together. Chen Ji picked a spot and swung his sickle. Suddenly, he heard a faint whimper. He paused, listening carefully, but decided it was probably his imagination.

—Though it likely wasn’t, Chen Ji chose to ignore it.

For spirits and monsters, his biggest advantage was not being dragged into their domains. As long as he stayed out of their realms, their Dharma Forms couldn’t touch him. Besides White Tiger Grandpa, was there anything a high-voltage stun baton couldn’t handle?

If one shock wasn’t enough, he could always deliver a second.

Chen Ji swung the sickle again, leaving a deep gash in the bamboo. Pleased with his strength, he continued with a third and fourth swing… Soon, half the bamboo was cut through. Chen Ji pushed down hard, and with a crack, the bamboo fell.

Strange cries filled the air, but Chen Ji ignored them, focused on trimming away the unwanted leaves. He removed the top and bottom, keeping only the greenest middle section. Then he took out a simple folding saw. This part was tricky to cut with a sickle, but the saw made it easy to get a clean slice.

The strange cries faded away.

System Cat couldn’t help but warn, “Chen Ji, something’s watching you. On your right.”

It had detected it through Chen Ji’s vision.

“It’s fine. Probably not a very powerful monster.” Chen Ji had already noticed a hazy gray shadow circling him.

Unlike Second Master Huang’s solid black Dharma Form or the red fox’s dark gray one, this Dharma Form was a faint gray, almost invisible if you weren’t paying attention.

“Chen Ji~” a voice whispered in his ear, calling his name.

Chen Ji lowered his gaze and kept walking. He wondered if this bamboo grove was somehow unlucky for him… Last time, after King Cobra died, it was here that it attacked him. A few days ago, he’d woken from a nightmare nearby. All in all, it felt inauspicious.

The gray shadow brushed against his leg as it circled him. If it had a physical form, Chen Ji would have tripped. The shadow was so faint he couldn’t even make out what it was.

Chen Ji continued walking until he noticed a small mound on the ground. He hesitated for a moment, then decided to dig up a little snack. Setting the bamboo aside, he started digging for bamboo shoots.

Seeing his indifference, the shadow’s calls grew sharper. Two claw-like shapes seemed to grasp at Chen Ji’s pants, trying to climb up his leg.

At that moment, Chen Ji moved. He pulled out the high-voltage stun baton he always carried, now equipped with a Tongxuan Talisman, and swung it at the gray shadow. The talisman activated upon contact, forcibly bridging the boundary between yin and yang.

With a loud thud, the gray shadow flew backward, yelping in pain. Blue electric arcs danced across its form. Lowering the baton, Chen Ji said calmly, “Did I give you permission?”

The shadow, already indistinct, writhed as the gray mist churned. From within, a cat-sized rat tumbled out. Chen Ji stepped on its chest, this time forgoing the electricity and delivering a solid whack with the baton.

This was pure physical force.

The rat screeched, blood trickling from its nose and mouth as it struggled. Chen Ji watched coldly. Remembering that rats weren’t protected animals, he pressed the stun button again.

A wisp of black smoke rose from the rat's body—whether it was alive or dead was unclear, but it had likely been knocked out.

It probably wasn't that easy to electrocute it—though his stun baton had been modified, its power was twice what it used to be, so it was hard to say for sure.

So that wasn't a dream after all—it was real.

The Tongxuan Talisman really worked when attached to the stun baton.

Chen Ji lifted his foot, thinking he wouldn't even want these shoes when he got home. He picked up the bamboo pole and was about to head back when he saw Second Master Huang staring at him, dumbfounded. Noticing Chen Ji’s glance, Second Master Huang awkwardly said, "...Well, you handled it... Ahem, I'm late."

"...Are you alright?" The moment the words left Second Master Huang’s mouth, he wanted to slap himself—did Chen Ji look like he wasn't alright?! Huh?!

Might as well check if that gray rat was okay or not!