Chapter 58 Has Guan Junshan Ever Really Loved Anyone?

Chapter 58: Has Guan Junshan ever truly loved anyone?

The staff in the secretarial office rotated on a fixed schedule. This was a rule set by Guan Yongyue.

This meant that even if someone had outstanding work ability and suited the boss's preferences, the personal assistants would still be constantly replaced. That was also why there had always been new candidates taking over as Guan Junshan's executive assistant.

But Yang Yue was different. He had stayed by Guan Junshan's side for a long time, from just after college graduation all the way to Guan Junshan's marriage.

Maybe it was really some fate. Fresh out of college, Yang Yue reported to the group and was assigned to the business department. Coincidentally, Guan Junshan started on the same day. Back then, he wasn't yet the group's crown prince, and Yang Yue, completely clueless, blurted out, "Brother Guan."

They became the only two newcomers in the department—no one to guide them, no one to manage them, basically left to fend for themselves. If they wanted business deals, they had to go out and visit clients on their own.

By Guan Junshan's side, Yang Yue was truly an unremarkable person.

Female clients wouldn't give him a second glance; male clients rolled their eyes in irritation the moment they heard his stammering opening lines. The department had a rule: if you didn't close any deals within the first month, your probation period would be cut short. Yang Yue knew he was in trouble. In the last few days of the month, he simply gave up, clocking in and out on time and leaving after work.

Later, Guan Junshan couldn't stand to watch anymore and handed over some of his own deals to Yang Yue. Yang Yue was nervous; having watched too many Hong Kong dramas as a kid, he was paranoid that he'd be set up and fired the next day.

In hindsight, even if Guan Junshan hadn't been the crown prince, he wouldn't have bothered to scheme against an ordinary colleague who was inferior in every way. No benefit, no need, and it would leave him open to criticism—too much trouble for nothing.

After Yang Yue made it through his first month, he grew bolder. Not only did he become close with Guan Junshan, calling him "brother," but he also voluntarily stayed late to work with him, organizing documents or driving for him, sneaking out during company dinners to buy hangover medicine and liver-protecting pills.

Guan Junshan was the kind of person who seemed hard to get along with—and in reality, he actually was.

They were both new hires; neither was above the other. Yang Yue occasionally got the cold shoulder from him, and they wouldn't speak for days. But he realized that if he didn't show a little more patience, no one else in the company would bother to get along with Guan Junshan.

Once, the two teamed up to win a big client, putting their monthly performance in the top three. They were called to report directly to the business director. Guan Junshan made an excuse to step out, giving all the opportunity and credit to Yang Yue. Yang Yue didn't understand, but he didn't take all the credit; during the report, he insisted on clearly stating the part Guan Junshan had handled.

The business director was delighted, beaming with joy, looking at Guan Junshan as if he were his own father, eager to fuss over every strand of his hair, even asking him for guidance on his own work.

With half a month left in the probation period, Guan Junshan's popularity suddenly picked up. Sometimes Yang Yue wanted to grab lunch with him but couldn't find the time; weekend client visits became a luxury, and Guan Junshan sometimes wouldn't even answer his calls.

Yang Yue's formal contract came together with a cross-department transfer notice. The business department was overstaffed, and he needed to report to the secretarial office for a specific position.

His college major was commercial asset management, and his job started in frontline sales—completely unrelated to being a secretary. Confused, Yang Yue clutched the transfer notice in his hand and went to report to the deputy general manager's office, his nominal new boss. That's when he saw Guan Junshan behind the desk.

It sounded like a plot from a romantic drama, but who says real life can't play out that way? Tempted by the salary, Yang Yue finally chose to compromise.

And then he stayed in that position for so many years. He became the only assistant who was never rotated out.

To be fair, Guan Junshan was a great boss. He was professional, level-headed, and generous. Due to the nature of the job, Yang Yue often had to take care of aspects of his personal life. These days, it was rare to find a man at Guan Junshan's level with such an uneventful private life. From that perspective, Yang Yue felt there probably wouldn't be another Guan Junshan.

Over the years, their relationship had been more than just superior-subordinate—it also retained a hint of the bond from when Yang Yue used to call him "brother."

Occasionally, on quieter weekends, Guan Junshan would come find Yang Yue to drink.

In the early days, when the company's business focus was on the mainland, they often went to the Houhai area in Beijing. Guan Junshan was never the type to initiate conversation, so Yang Yue usually started. At the time, he had a long-distance girlfriend, and they often fought over work and buying a house, threatening to call it quits. Drunk, Yang Yue would cry, bawling his eyes out.

The usually stern Guan Junshan would only crack a slight smile at times like this. His words of comfort didn't sound like comfort at all—each one stabbed into Yang Yue's heart, running the numbers on whether his salary could afford a certain neighborhood in the city center, how many years of mortgage he'd have to pay, and how many years it would take to pay off his younger brother's student loans.

Hearing enough, Yang Yue sometimes snapped back with a cold question: "Then what are you worrying about yourself?"

Unlike ordinary people like Yang Yue, Guan Junshan's worries were straightforward and pure, without all those complicated emotions. Mostly, they were about project delays, Wu Manzhen's health, or his playboy half-brother (different mother).

As for his personal love life, he rarely mentioned it—it was as if it had never existed.

Once, Guan Junshan came to him for a drink again. At that time, they were temporarily stationed in Hong Kong for a project. For some reason, the Hong Kong media loved to chase exclusives about Young Master Guan—probably thanks to Guan Yongyue, mistakenly assuming the father and son were equally dashing and romantic.

So when Guan Junshan came to find Yang Yue, he had to be extra careful, often late at night. They were once caught by paparazzi, and the next day's headline read, "Love-struck Young Master Guan Meets Lover in Cheap Clothes, Sets Up Love Nest in Slum!"—a huge misunderstanding.

Wu Manzhen saw the tabloid and even called to ask if it was true.

Yang Yue quickly clarified, "No, Mrs. Wu, the person in the paper is me."

Wu Manzhen was silent for a moment, then asked, "So does Junshan really not like women?"

Yang Yue didn't answer. Clutching his phone, he glanced over at Guan Junshan sitting on the balcony not far away.

Actually, that was the first time he learned about Guan Junshan's sexual orientation. It was never something he deliberately hid—he just rarely needed to explain it to anyone. He had no ex-girlfriends, only one youthful, naive ex-boyfriend, and it hadn't ended well. Just over a month ago, during the New Year, that ex had called him out to call him a scumbag.

When talking about his ex, Guan Junshan's tone was calm—more like he was recalling the details of a failed project than reminiscing about a past relationship.

Eventually, the whole thing fizzled out. The Hong Kong media could never dig up more details, and Wu Manzhen stopped pursuing it, no longer calling him nonstop.

Sometimes Yang Yue felt he knew Guan Junshan well enough; other times, he thought that after all these years, what Guan Junshan was willing to share was just the tip of the iceberg.

After all, before Lin Haoda appeared, he'd always believed Guan Junshan wasn't the type to get caught up in romantic feelings.

And Lin Haoda—Mr. Lin—in Yang Yue's view, aside from having pleasing looks, seemed ordinary and mediocre in both work and personality that could easily be overlooked.

Guan Junshan first showed signs of change after the winery ball that night. Something might have happened that Yang Yue didn't know about, but regardless, he fulfilled his assistant duties and sent a drunk Lin Haoda to his room to rest.

When leaving, Yang Yue met Guan Junshan in the hallway.

He wasn't in the front hall seeing off guests but was here, with slightly disheveled hair and collar, rubbing his thumb over his ring, his eyes deep and unreadable, silent.

The hallway light cast a dim shadow. Yang Yue walked over and called out, "Boss Guan."

Guan Junshan looked at him, still with that expression. After a long silence, he suddenly spoke: "I almost kissed him just now."

Yang Yue stared at him, his lips moved slowly, but said nothing.

Guan Junshan didn't mind the lack of response and continued in a low voice: "He was drunk, but I wasn't."

For a moment, Yang Yue thought of Wu Manzhen and Jiang Tianyi, of the tabloid gossip blown out of proportion. Setting aside his secretary role, he called him "Brother Guan" for the first time and asked, "Are you serious?"

"Maybe," Guan Junshan paused, then added, "But I wouldn't kiss Jiang Tianyi."

Afraid the newspapers would misreport, Yang Yue started appearing more often around Lin Haoda. After all, with assistants and drivers present, it was too much of a stretch to say there was something between two men.

He once suggested to Guan Junshan that they replace Lin Haoda—the romance planning project could continue, but the planner didn't have to be Lin Haoda. Having a married woman by his side might be safer.

Guan Junshan, while fastening his cufflinks, glanced at him in the mirror. His gaze was a little cold, with a faint hint of displeasure. As he picked up his briefcase and walked out of the room, he said quietly, "There's nothing between him and me anyway," as if accusing Yang Yue of causing collateral damage.

Yang Yue said nothing, following behind him. As they stepped into the elevator, he asked again, "Does Mr. Lin feel the same way about you?"

Guan Junshan stepped into the elevator first, pressed the floor button, and said, "Of course."

What the hell? This wasn't some Romeo and Juliet drama. Yang Yue felt a headache coming on.

As a secretary, he should indeed dissuade him. But as a friend, he knew there was no real feeling between Guan Junshan and Jiang Tianyi. Yang Yue thought for a moment, then said with a bitter smile, "How about I go tip off the paparazzi now, say there's something between you and me? Maybe more people would believe that."

After a pause, he added, "Call it a misdirection."

Guan Junshan smiled, his expression softening a bit.

That was just talk, a joke—there was no way he'd actually do it.

One person's misery is just a feeling; two people's becomes a real hassle. Later, Guan Junshan no longer sought out Yang Yue for drinks, even on less busy weekends, because his worries had become concrete and all pointed to one person.

Wu Manzhen rarely dared to make small talk with Guan Junshan, afraid of disrupting his work. Sometimes her calls would come through to Yang Yue, and Mrs. Wu, being meticulous, would remind him to keep an eye on Guan Junshan and make sure he bundled up as the weather turned cold.

Occasionally, they would also discuss Guan Junshan’s wedding to Jiang Tianyi — the ring selection scheduled for early next month, the Italian wedding dress designer coming to Hong Kong around New Year — every detail meticulously arranged, just waiting for Guan Junshan to show up and play his part as the groom.

But Guan Junshan had clearly just kissed another man, at the aquarium. Yang Yue had only just returned from there, having retrieved the surveillance footage and arranged for its destruction.

Wu Manzhen was still on the phone talking about Jiang Tianyi, saying she hadn’t expected Guan Junshan to accept things so calmly, that she had thought he would be more rebellious and not go along with an arranged marriage.

Finally, she asked Yang Yue, "Has Jun Shan ever truly loved anyone?"

"Yeah, probably," Yang Yue told her.

Wu Manzhen fell silent.

She paused on the other end for a moment, then hung up.

In fact, Yang Yue had also wondered — someone as picky and hard to please as Guan Junshan, what kind of person would he ever fall for?

But when he arrived at Guan Junshan’s home on a perfectly ordinary morning and saw the ordinary, unremarkable Lin Haoda, saw the two of them holding each other after a brief quarrel like countless ordinary couples, heard Lin Haoda say to Guan Junshan, "I’ll try to get used to you, but can you learn to cut me some slack?" — it suddenly hit him.

Perhaps, from the very beginning, Guan Junshan’s standards for who he loves never changed.

Just like how he picks his friends in this world.