Chapter 94 Cheng Yian, do you really have feelings for…?

Chapter 94 Cheng Yian, do you really have feelings for...?

Seeing Wang Yunxiu's composure, Lu Xusheng laughed heartily, released his hand, and invited him to sit down.

"In those days when my father was still with us, we trained in martial arts and archery together at the frontier. In my heart, cousin, you are no less than my own brother."

Wang Yunxiu showed a hint of melancholy, reminiscing, "Yes, after my uncle passed away, no one has ever taught me so attentively."

Lu Xusheng also seemed lost in thought, "Indeed, I still remember when I went to Baiyin Mountain, cousin, you waited for me at the frontier for three whole months. You were the only one who believed I would survive."

Wang Yunxiu seemed unable to bear the memories, his eyes welling up with pain, and he could no longer speak.

Noticing the situation, Lu Jisheng quickly changed the subject, "Let's not talk about the past anymore. Speaking of cousin's visit to the capital, what are your plans?"

Wang Yunxiu slightly composed his thoughts and replied, "The Empress Dowager intends for me to observe the administration at the Ministry of Revenue."

Lu Jisheng said, "Cousin, the Ministry of Revenue is under the control of Minister Zheng. Can you really get in?"

Wang Yunxiu glanced at Lu Xusheng, "I heard that cousin's brother-in-law is serving at the Ministry of Revenue. Could you possibly help me out?"

Lu Xusheng rolled up his narrow sleeves and sighed, "You don't know, I don't get along with that brother-in-law of mine. I can hardly even enter the Cheng family's gate on a regular day, let alone ask for a favor."

Wang Yunxiu smiled and said no more.

The front hall was filled with joy, and the rear garden's flower hall was also harmonious.

Lady Wang, known for her eloquence, praised Cheng Yian as if she were one of a kind.

Cheng Yian half-listened to Lady Wang while noticing Wang Yunyi's intense gaze from the corner of her eye.

This was also the first time Cheng Yian had met Wang Yunyi.

As the eldest daughter of the Wang family, Wang Yunyi had been raised in luxury since childhood. Her demeanor as a young lady even overshadowed her mother standing beside her. Cheng Yian grew curious; such a refined woman didn't seem the type to stir up trouble at home. Perhaps appearances can be deceiving?

Noticing her daughter's silent, somewhat impolite stare at Cheng Yian, Lady Wang gently tugged at her sleeve, "Didn't you say you brought a congratulatory gift for your cousin-in-law? Why not present it now?"

It was clear that her daughter was still upset about Lu Xusheng, but now that he was married with children, further entanglement would be inappropriate.

Wang Yunyi signaled to her maid, who then presented a long, ornate brocade box. Wang Yunyi smiled,

"Here's a Five Blessings doll from Qingzhou's kilns, for you to enjoy, cousin-in-law."

"Thank you," Cheng Yian did not open it and instructed Ding Xiang to keep it.

Lady Wang sensed the underlying tension and struggled to ease it, but her efforts were in vain. She felt as if she were sitting on pins and needles. Soon, the second mistress and Third Mistress arrived, announcing that lunch would be served in the flower hall.

Originally, female guests were to dine in the rear garden while male guests feasted in the front courtyard. Unexpectedly, Wang Yunyi turned to the second mistress and said,

"Aunt, it's been ages since I've seen my cousins. Let's invite them to join us in the flower hall. We're family—no need for formalities."

The second mistress looked troubled. In the past, this wouldn't have been an issue, but now, given the situation between Wang Yunyi and Lu Xusheng, it was inconvenient for them to meet. The second mistress was caught in a dilemma.

Third Mistress, fully aware of the situation and fearing Wang Yunyi might stir up trouble, quickly stepped in,

"Why mingle with those young masters? They're fond of drink, and I can't bear the smell. Let's dine separately."

Wang Yunyi, sensing the awkwardness that followed her suggestion, smiled and said,

"I always feel like the Lu family is wary of me. It's just a meal, why all this caution? When we were young, cousin, because of his striking looks, was mistaken for a girl by the nanny. When he dirtied his clothes, she even gave him my clothes to wear. How should we interpret that?"

Cheng Yian narrowed her eyes, realizing what was going on.

Liu Shi, the eldest lady, had heard enough and said with a cold face,

"Is it that we are wary of Miss Wang, or is Miss Wang being too aggressive? As the saying goes, the guest should follow the host's lead, but Miss Wang acts as if she’s not a guest in our Lu family."

Lady Wang’s composure was slipping, and she glared at her daughter.

The second mistress, worried the situation would escalate, reluctantly said, "Alright, go and invite Xusheng and the others to dine in the flower hall."

Soon, Lu Xusheng and Wang Yunxiu entered together through the ornate hanging flower gate.

As soon as Lu Xusheng appeared, he felt someone’s gaze fixed on him, and he felt a headache coming on. Without looking at Wang Yunyi, he first went forward to greet Lady Wang,

"I pay my respects to my aunt."

"Xusheng, it's been years since we last met, and you've changed again. To become a cabinet minister at such a young age, it’s evident my sister-in-law has raised you well, and An An has been instrumental in managing the household." Lady Wang couldn’t help but praise them all.

"You’re too kind, aunt," he replied, and only then did he turn to face Wang Yunyi, giving her a bow, "Cousin, I trust you’ve been well."

Wang Yunyi stared at him for a long time, a complex emotion flashing in her eyes, and returned the bow, "Greetings, cousin."

"It's been three years since we last met, and cousin has already married and had children." She stared at Lu Xusheng openly.

What a bold statement.

Lu Xusheng glanced lightly at Cheng Yian not far away and replied without changing his expression,

"I’m deeply grateful to His Majesty for arranging the marriage, and for the heavens' favor in bringing your sister-in-law to me. It’s a blessing that spans three lifetimes."

Cheng Yian, hearing this, gave him a reproachful look, "Aren’t you worried about embarrassing yourself in front of guests?"

Lu Xusheng immediately moved to her side, speaking warmly, "My aunt is family, and among family, we need not stand on such ceremony."

This was a return of the words Wang Yunyi had just spoken.

Wang Yunyi let out a derisive laugh.

Lady Wang awkwardly said it was nothing, "It’s wonderful to see young couples so affectionate." She discreetly signaled her daughter to stay quiet.

The second mistress then introduced Wang Yunxiu, and Lu Shuzhi stepped forward to greet her cousin. Everyone took their places, with hosts and guests seated accordingly.

Soon the dishes were served, and the second mistress and Lu Xusheng exchanged some polite conversation before the meal started.

During the meal, Lu Xusheng, having developed good habits in the Cheng family, thoughtfully served dishes to Cheng Yian. Following the elder's lead, Lu Jisheng and Lu Xisheng also served soup and dishes to their wives. In the past, the second mistress would have certainly thought her sons were undermining the dignity of the family head, but with Wang Yunyi present today, she bit her tongue, hoping Wang Yunyi would see this and finally settle down.

Unfortunately, she underestimated her niece's stubbornness.

Among the dishes was a stir-fried field rat, known as a 'field monkey,' which is a rodent that removes pests from the fields. This type of rat meat is very tender, and wealthy families use it to make dried rat meat, which is then stir-fried with ginger, scallions, and oil, making it a very appetizing dish.

It was now summer, the time when field rats are at their fattest, and this dish was served.

Wang Yunyi froze, her face contorting in disgust, and exclaimed,

"Is this rat meat?"

Hearing this, Lu Xusheng's chopsticks paused, and his face suddenly turned pale.

The second mistress and others, seeing this, all looked at Wang Yunyi.

Mrs. Bai, the third young lady in charge of the kitchen, immediately explained,

"This is stir-fried field monkey, a dish we all love very much. It’s quite appetizing. What’s wrong? Doesn’t it suit Miss Cousin’s taste?"

Upon hearing this, Wang Yunyi suddenly put down her chopsticks and stared at Cheng Yian with clear eyes,

"Oh, Sister-in-law, you’re really doing a great job as the mistress of the house, aren’t you? You don’t even know what your husband fears the most?"

This remark froze the atmosphere at the table.

Cheng Yian slowly narrowed her eyes, glancing sideways at Lu Xusheng. She clearly noticed that the hand on his knee had clenched slightly. Lu Xusheng rarely made such gestures unless he was uncomfortable or uneasy. The last time Cheng Yian saw him like this was when she was in excruciating pain during childbirth.

Lu Xusheng had stayed in Silver Mountain for three whole months, and no one knew what he had experienced there. He never mentioned it after returning. Cheng Yian once tried to probe indirectly, but Lu Xusheng waved it off, saying there was no need to dwell on the past. He didn’t want to talk about it, so Cheng Yian didn’t press further. At that time, they were just a couple living together, not expecting much from their relationship.

But today, when these words came from Wang Yunyi’s mouth, Cheng Yian knew what it meant.

Her heart felt a sharp pain, thumping painfully.

Lu Xusheng was afraid of rats.

It was a rather bizarre thing.

Even the second madam was surprised,

"Is that true?" All eyes turned to Lu Xusheng.

Lu Xusheng suddenly smiled, shaking his head, "No, it’s nothing. I was bitten by a rat once when I was young at the Wang residence, which left me with a dislike. My cousin must have misunderstood."

As he said this, Lu Xusheng glanced at Wang Yunxiu, who kept his gaze lowered and remained silent.

Wang Yunyi retorted, "Is that so, cousin? I know you..."

"Shut up!" Lu Xusheng shot her an icy glare.

"If you're here as a guest, cousin, then keep quiet and eat. Otherwise, get out. You're not welcome in the Lu household."

Wang Yunyi, who had never been treated so harshly before, flushed red with embarrassment, tears streaming down her face. She threw down her chopsticks and stormed out of the hall.

The atmosphere froze once again.

Lu Xusheng's expression remained unchanged, but Cheng Yian could tell he had lost his appetite. Her gaze fell on his fingers, which were resting on his knees, pale and with veins showing.

Bai Shi, though unclear about the details, cleverly took the blame upon herself.

"Mother, elder brother, sister-in-law, it's my fault. Sister-in-law had reminded me before, but I forgot. The dried field mouse looked so similar to dried radish that I didn't think much of it..."

Cheng Yian couldn't let someone else shoulder the blame and immediately reassured her.

"Today's banquet was excellently prepared. Third sister-in-law worked hard. As for the stir-fried field mouse, it's one of my favorite dishes," she said, then turned to the embarrassed Lady Wang and second mistress with a graceful smile.

"I'm not going to stop eating my favorite dishes just because someone else doesn't like them. To each their own. My husband wouldn't want me to sacrifice my preferences for him, would you?"

As she spoke, Cheng Yian covered his cold hand with hers. Lu Xusheng met her calm gaze and nodded in agreement.

Just then, Lu Xisheng tentatively raised his hand. "I like this dish too..."

The fourth mistress shot him a look, thinking, wasn't this dish made for you? Now the second and third mistresses are left holding the bag.

Lady Wang was livid with her daughter, and seeing her son stay silent, she felt completely humiliated. She stood up and bowed to the second and Third Mistresses.

"I failed in raising my daughter and apologize to both mistresses."

The banquet ended on a sour note.

Lady Wang left with her son, but unable to find Wang Yunyi right away, she sent a maid to search for her. Sitting in the carriage, she complained to her son,

"Yunxiu, what’s the matter with you? I wanted to talk about your marriage to Shuzhi today, why didn’t you go along with it?"

Wang Yunxiu clasped his hands in front of his abdomen, lowering his eyes and speaking softly,

"Mother, there’s no point in planning; there’s no future between me and my cousin."

Lu Xusheng clearly caught on; he wouldn’t let his sister marry him.

Lady Wang was shocked, "Just because of your sister’s outburst?"

Wang Yunxiu shook his head, "You know as well as I do, if Lu Xusheng doesn’t agree, this marriage isn’t happening."

Lady Wang thought of her daughter's provocation towards Lu Xusheng and Cheng Yian today, and immediately covered her face and cried, "Yunyi, Yunyi, why did she have to go and do something so foolish?"

The Lu family was the Wang family’s only hope; without this connection, the Wang family’s fate is tied to the Crown Prince.

Wang Yunxiu watched his crying mother with indifference.

Cheng Yian, worried about her child, headed to Ningji Hall first. Lu Xusheng was held up by the second mistress for some instructions. After a brief delay, he passed through the Chuihua Gate into the front courtyard, called the steward, and ordered, "From now on, reject all name cards from the Wang family."

Then he called Qiu Qing and instructed, "Starting today, stay by the mistress’s side and keep a close watch on Wang Yunxiu, got it?"

"Understood!"

After giving his orders, Lu Xusheng bypassed the main hall, intending to go to Ningji Hall via the slanting corridor, but unexpectedly, someone was standing straight on the slanting corridor. Several stewards wanted to ask her to leave but couldn't, considering she was the family's cousin, they were in a dilemma. Seeing Lu Xusheng coming, the stewards immediately bowed,

"Sir, your cousin insists on waiting for you here; we couldn’t get her to leave."

Lu Xusheng waved his hand, signaling them to leave, and stood five steps away from Wang Yunyi, frowning at her, "What do you need?"

Wang Yunyi had obviously been crying, her nose was red, and tear stains remained on her cheeks,

"Cousin, I see now that Cheng Yian doesn’t care about you at all. She doesn’t even know you hate rats or anything about your time at Silver Mountain. How can she call herself your wife?"

Lu Xusheng's face turned cold, "Our business is none of your concern."

"Wang Yunyi, I’ve never promised to marry you or given you any reason to think otherwise. You shouldn’t be here stirring up trouble. Out of respect for our family ties, leave now and don’t come back. I don’t want to see you again."

Upon hearing this, Wang Yunyi suddenly sneered, "You never promised to marry me, but what about your mother? If it weren’t for her, I wouldn’t have been so set on you. Your family has ruined my chances; shouldn’t you take responsibility?"

Lu Xusheng scoffed lightly, "Don’t blame my mother. If your grandfather and uncles wanted to marry you off, they could have done it long ago. Could my mother have stopped them? Besides, you know exactly why your family wants to marry into mine."

Seeing that she couldn’t pin it on him, Wang Yunyi stopped beating around the bush, wiped away her tears and said,

"You’ve seen it—the Wang family isn’t what it once was, and I don’t care for anyone else now. You can’t spend your whole life with just Cheng Yian. Why not take me as a concubine? If you’re willing to give me a child, I’d be forever grateful. If not, just give me a title. With this marriage, when the Crown Prince falls, the Emperor might spare the Wang family."

Lu Xusheng couldn’t believe what he was hearing, but remembering Wang Yunyi’s behavior in his past life, it wasn’t entirely unexpected. He didn’t have time for her nonsense and pointed outside,

"Cheng Yian and I are deeply in love; there’s no room for anyone else. Will you leave on your own, or do I need to have someone show you out?"

Seeing how cold he was, Wang Yunyi panicked and cried, "Cousin, we grew up together. I was supposed to marry you, but Cheng Yian got in the way. Now I’m willing to be a concubine—what more does she want?"

Two maids came to take Wang Yunyi, but before they could grab her, she shook them off, walked out crying, and glanced back at Lu Xusheng.

"I know you better than she does. I know what you like and dislike inside out. You married her, yet you have to humble yourself in front of her. Why? You are the most renowned commander of our Great Jin Dynasty, its youngest cabinet minister. Lu Xusheng, there is nothing about you that makes you unworthy of her. You really don’t have to belittle yourself..."

"Lu Xusheng, I know you fear rats. You were once forced to watch as rats devoured the bodies of your comrades. To survive, you had to kill and eat those rats. Lu Xusheng, no one in this world loves you more than I do..."

Lu Xusheng closed his eyes and took a few deep breaths.

The person had left long ago, but her voice still seemed to linger in the air.

The irritation of being harassed by her in his past life welled up in his heart.

Lu Xusheng returned to his study, bathed, changed clothes, splashed cold water on his face, dried it, and then strode toward Ningji Hall.

The courtyard was quiet, with no sounds at noon, not even a cicada.

Lu Xusheng slowly walked to the corridor and saw Cheng Yian and their child napping on the daybed through the moon window.

Perhaps anticipating his arrival, Cheng Yian had dismissed the servants, leaving only the two of them in the east chamber.

Lu Xusheng lifted the curtain and entered, first glancing at Cheng Yian's expression, which remained calm, as if nothing had happened.

Lu Xusheng did not speak immediately, feeling a dryness in his throat. He picked up the teapot to pour tea, but it was too hot, so he put it down.

He sat down by the cradle opposite Cheng Yian.

The child was sleeping on the inner side of the daybed, cradled by Cheng Yian, with a fair and adorable face. Cheng Yian, with her back to Lu Xusheng, was gently fanning the child with a small silk fan to keep the mosquitoes away.

After a long silence,

Lu Xusheng spoke first, "I didn’t tell you about the Silver Mountain incident because it’s the deepest wound of my past and present life, like a nightmare I don’t want to recall or mention. When I carried my father’s body back to the Great Jin Dynasty, Wang Yunxiu was waiting for me at the border. He probably learned the details from the remaining soldiers and relayed them to Wang Yunyi."

Lu Xusheng knew the root of today’s issue and thus explained it straightforwardly.

Cheng Yian felt deeply uncomfortable upon hearing this. The deepest wound of her husband was something she learned from someone else. She remained motionless, nodding faintly, "I understand. After all, I haven’t told you everything either. And as a wife, I haven’t been attentive enough. I’m also at fault."

Seeing her reflect on this, Lu Xusheng felt even more uneasy, "An An, if you’re feeling upset, let it out. Don’t keep it inside. We can discuss anything properly."

"Discuss what?" Cheng Yian turned around, put down the fan, and looked at him expressionlessly, "Discuss her becoming your second wife?"

What had happened on the corridor had already been reported to her word for word by a maid.

Lu Xusheng smiled bitterly, "That’s out of the question. I’ve already told the steward not to let the Wang family in again."

Hearing this, Cheng Yian was at a loss for words and nodded silently, then turned back to wipe the child’s sweat.

Lu Xusheng was ready for her to yell or cause a scene, but Cheng Yian remained silent, "An An, is this matter really over just like that?"

Cheng Yian didn’t turn her head, "Hmm," she acknowledged. What happened was in the past and couldn’t be changed. After all, they were cousins for many years, so she knew Lu Xusheng better than I did. Although Lu Xusheng wasn’t as charming as her father, given his high position, many would surely have their eyes on him. Today it was Wang Yunyi, tomorrow it could be someone else. Cheng Yian couldn’t let such things bother her; it wasn’t worth it.

Lu Xusheng, perhaps still uneasy or for other reasons, asked again, "Really not upset?"

Cheng Yian thought for a moment and shook her head, "Don’t worry, I’m not as narrow-minded as you."

She couldn’t possibly follow Lu Xusheng’s lead and beat Wang Yunyi, could she?

Lu Xusheng pressed his lips together and remained silent.

Compared to himself, who couldn’t even stand to hear the name Fan Yulin, Cheng Yian’s reaction to Wang Yunyi’s visit was surprisingly calm.

Was she truly being magnanimous, or did she just not care about him?

Lu Xusheng suddenly asked, "An An, in your heart, do you see me as a husband to share a life with, or as the man you truly love?"

He had wanted to ask this the last time his cousin from the Tang family showed interest in him. Back then, Cheng Yian didn’t even flinch when another woman tried to interfere.

If he were in her shoes, he would have wanted to destroy the other party.

If he were the man she truly loved, she would surely feel possessive.

Hearing this, Cheng Yian's heart skipped a beat, and an indescribable anger surged within her.

His little cousin had come to their doorstep, offering to be his concubine, and she had chosen to be magnanimous, not letting it affect their marital bond. Yet, instead of appreciating her restraint, he was now doubting her.

Cheng Yian couldn’t deny that today’s events had crossed a line, and she was indeed very angry. But her grace and upbringing told her not to lose her temper, not to give the wrongdoers any satisfaction.

But at this moment, her anger could no longer be contained.

Cheng Yian turned around, giving him a cold smile.

"Lu Xusheng, wasn’t it our initial agreement to simply share a life together? What, are you trying to overstep now?"

Her eyes were calm, so calm that not a ripple of emotion showed.

But her words felt like a cold splash of water over Lu Xusheng’s heart. He abruptly stood up, his gaze icy and unyielding, staring at her without moving.

He knew they had missed each other in their past life, and in this life, he had compelled her to stay. He shouldn’t have hoped for too much, but the more he invested emotionally, the more he wanted.

Yet Cheng Yian’s words left him without a retort.

The child was asleep; he couldn’t quarrel with her.

Lu Xusheng’s brows furrowed, and he turned away in anger.

A few thunderclaps echoed across the sky without warning, dark clouds gathered, gradually enveloping the sky. Lu Xusheng returned to his study, standing under the corridor, closing his eyes and taking deep breaths, his expression more disheveled than ever before.

In his disheveled state, he also found himself ridiculous, laughable.

In his past life, he was unhappy when his cousin made a scene. In this life, he was unhappy when Cheng Yian didn’t make a scene.

But he knew this was different.

Raindrops began to fall sporadically, and Lu Xusheng closed his eyes, letting the rain wash over his face.

On Cheng Yian’s side, she watched him turn and leave, so angry that she flung the small fan in her hand.

She rarely got angry in both her past and present life, and never had she flung anything before. This was the first time.

Ding Xiang saw this and quietly came in to pick up the fan, wiping it clean. Seeing Cheng Yian’s furious expression, her face red with anger, she couldn’t help but feel sorry for her, "Miss, the master brought this trouble upon himself, and now he’s giving you attitude. Let’s return to the Cheng family, take the little master with us, and not suffer this humiliation here."

Cheng Yian let out a bitter laugh, then slowly took the fan back, "I won’t return to my parents’ home. I’ll go back when I’m happy, but I won’t go back when I’m arguing with my husband. Why should my entire family suffer because of him? Lu Xusheng doesn’t deserve it!"

"Unless it’s a divorce, I won’t return to my parents’ home. Otherwise, I won’t go back when we’re having a disagreement."

After a moment of thought, she moved back onto the bed, sitting calmly, fanning herself, "Even if we divorce, I won’t return to the Cheng family. I’ll take my child to the south, buy a villa, and live a carefree life!"

As soon as she finished speaking, a familiar voice echoed from outside the corridor.

"Who wants a divorce? Who dares to mention it? I'll cut out her tongue!"

In response to these words, Lu Xusheng strode in with his hands behind his back, his eyes throwing daggers at Dingxiang.

Dingxiang, frightened, knelt on the ground, not daring to make a sound, and looked at Cheng Yian for help. Cheng Yian waved her off generously,

"Go cook me a bowl of bird's nest. This has nothing to do with you. Without my order, no one will touch you."

Dingxiang felt as if she had been granted a reprieve and immediately left.

Cheng Yian waited until she was gone, then turned to look at the still furious man, asking with a cold laugh,

"Oh, why did you come back? That doesn't seem like your usual style, Lord Lu?"

Lu Xusheng's chest was tight with anger.

He had promised not to get angry with Cheng Yian; she had just given birth to a lovely child, after such a hard time, postpartum women were prone to depression, and he shouldn't be causing her any trouble. So he washed his face and came back, only to overhear the conversation between mistress and servant.

"Can we stop bringing up divorce so easily?"

"Who mentioned divorce? Who turned around and walked away?" Cheng Yian glared at him irritably.

Lu Xusheng was speechless, then moved to sit beside her again, this time directly in front of the arhat bed. Cheng Yian turned away, ignoring him. The rain poured outside, and the thunder woke the baby, who waved his arms and frowned, about to cry. Cheng Yian gently patted his chest and whispered,

"Jiusi, Mama is here, Jiusi isn't afraid..."

These words smoothed out the wrinkles in Lu Xusheng's heart. He waited for Cheng Yian to soothe the baby, then said softly,

"I was wrong just now. I apologize to you."

"You’re never in the wrong, you never do anything wrong," Cheng Yian said, focusing on wiping the child’s sweat and not even glancing at him.

Lu Xusheng’s anger flared up again, "In the past, Fan Yulin’s name was my weak spot. Just thinking about you leaving with him, living with him for five years, and even..." Lu Xusheng’s handsome face tightened, his voice icy, "It makes me feel awful."

"On the other hand, you’ve been so calm and composed with your cousin, which made me think you didn’t care about me at all."

Cheng Yian was furious, turning her head to scold him, "As if you didn’t spend your life with her! Who was it whose mother looked down on me? Who kept comparing me to Wang Yunyi day in and day out, talking about how close you were as children, how perfect a match you were? I’m the one you married in a proper ceremony, yet in the end, I felt like the third wheel!"

"And because of that, I lost the baby I had been carrying for months!" At this point, Cheng Yian hugged her knees and cried uncontrollably, finally letting out the long-suppressed grievances.

Lu Xusheng immediately felt diminished, his heart aching as if it were being cut. He reached out to pull her, but Cheng Yian pushed him away.

Lu Xusheng had no choice but to admit his mistake, "Yes, ultimately, it was my fault in our past life for not looking after you properly. As for my mother, I did scold her, but I wasn’t around the manor much, and I didn’t pay enough attention, which caused you to suffer."

"But no matter what, there’s one thing I must make clear to you: I’ve never had feelings for my cousin, neither in this life nor the past."

Cheng Yian wiped her tears with a handkerchief and sneered, "Forget it, didn’t you marry her right away? That shows how eager you were! Look at how your cousin dresses, every detail perfectly matches your tastes. She’s the one who truly matches you. You two are a perfect match!"

Since the argument had already started, there was no need to hold back. Cheng Yian decided to lay it all out.

Lu Xusheng refused to accept this, "I only agreed to it because I was upset after learning you left the capital with Fan Yulin, and my mother kept pushing us together. I agreed in a fit of anger."

Cheng Yian rolled her eyes, "If you didn’t have feelings for her, how could you live with her for five years?"

At this, Lu Xusheng suddenly fell silent. After a long pause, he finally spoke, "We never shared a bed."

Cheng Yian was stunned, hardly able to believe it. She glanced at him, scrutinizing him from head to toe, her voice dripping with sarcasm,

"Who are you trying to fool? I know exactly what kind of person you are. With me, you could hardly keep your hands off me for a single night,

and you expect me to believe you could resist your dear cousin?"

Lu Xusheng found Cheng Yian's words utterly nauseating, "Why would I deceive you?"

"You're just trying to butter me up."

"Do I seem like the kind of man who would spout nonsense to win a woman's trust?"

Cheng Yian paused, "Then why didn't you mention it before?"

"Because you wouldn't have bought it."

Cheng Yian indeed didn't believe him.

Lu Xusheng explained,

"On our wedding night in our past life, she wore a wedding gown identical to yours and sat on our marital bed. Seeing her, I couldn't help but think of you, of how my wife had left with another man. I felt so stifled that I had no desire that night. It wouldn't have been fair to her to approach her with such bitterness, so I apologized and asked her to give me some time."

"And then?"

"Two weeks later, my mother kept insisting that I consummate the marriage. I went, but guess what happened?"

"What happened?"

"She used a love potion..."

Cheng Yian: "......"

She knew that in their past life, Lu Xusheng had a foul temper and was quite eccentric. Once, she had cooked him a kidney soup during the day to replenish his energy after a particularly intense night, but it had only offended him.

"So you were upset and didn't consummate the marriage."

Lu Xusheng nodded, "That time, I berated her and left immediately."

"Truth be told, I wasn't very interested," Lu Xusheng rubbed his forehead, admitting, "It's like a man who has tasted the finest delicacies finding it hard to appreciate ordinary fare. So later, when I was stationed at the border, whenever I thought of a woman, it was always you. It was only then that I realized I yearned for your body and adored your quiet nature. Sadly, by the time I realized it, it was too late."

Cheng Yian: "......."

Unable to contain her rage, she grabbed a pillow from beside her and hurled it at his face.

Lu Xusheng caught it, his eyes filled with bitterness,

"So An An, in my past life, I was too proud to admit my mistakes, and I deserved it!"

Cheng Yian snorted lightly and asked, "Go on about your cousin."

Lu Xusheng continued, "After that, my cousin started throwing fits, causing trouble with the main branch and clashing with my mother. She then began to act on rumors, targeting some of the maids. Coincidentally, at that time, Northern Qi was invading our borders, and I volunteered to leave the capital."

Cheng Yian thought from a woman's perspective, "Lu Xusheng, you were too harsh. You treated me poorly in our past life, and you weren't fair to Wang Yunyi either."

Lu Xusheng nodded, "I do feel I wronged my cousin. So I promised that as long as the Wang family stayed out of political struggles, I would ensure their safety. But my cousin's most audacious act was when she chased me to the military camp."

Cheng Yian was shocked and then said, "But you can't blame her; after all, you were the one who neglected her."

At this point, Lu Xusheng suddenly sneered, "That's what I thought too. But the truth is, my cousin, under the guise of being my wife, openly entered my study in the mansion and brazenly chased me to the military camp. Her real goal wasn't me, but to gather information."

Cheng Yian took a deep breath, "Was she spying for the Empress Dowager?"

Lu Xusheng shook his head with a bitter smile, "If she had really been reporting to the Empress Dowager, I would have discovered it long ago. But she didn't. She appeared to be a wife desperately wanting to be affectionate with her husband. She tailed me everywhere I went. Everyone believed she simply wanted to be my wife and let their guard down around her. Some soldiers even played matchmaker behind the scenes, making things convenient for her. But the truth was, she was just keeping tabs on my every move, biding her time to strike when I was most vulnerable."

"I didn’t tell you the truth about her after I was reborn because I also felt I had wronged her. Only when I went south to Jinling and faced the sharpshooter who took me out in my past life did I discover this sharpshooter was from the Wang family."

Cheng Yian’s heart jumped into her throat, and she hurriedly asked, "Who is the sharpshooter?"

"As far as we can tell, it should be Wang Yunxiu."

Cheng Yian collapsed onto the pillow, drenched in cold sweat.

Recalling the gentle and handsome Mr. Wang from today, it was shocking that someone like him could be the assassin. Good heavens.

"He was here at the mansion today?" Cheng Yian was terrified.

Lu Xusheng grasped her icy wrist, "Don't worry, I've already increased security. I’ve got Qiu Qing posted on the roof of Ningji Hall, never leaving your side or the child's. Besides, I won't let him step into the Lu mansion again."

Cheng Yian asked anxiously, "What about you?"

"Afraid of him? I could snap him like a twig. He doesn’t dare to confront me now."

"We can’t just leave this hanging. What do you plan to do?"

Lu Xusheng's gaze shifted to the window, his expression fierce, "Tear the Wang family and the Crown Prince out by the roots."

The storm grew fiercer, with lightning occasionally illuminating the room. The child woke up scared, and Cheng Yian called the wet nurse to take him to the west chamber to soothe him. When she turned back, she saw Lu Xusheng sitting motionless, the silver light casting a lonely shadow on his back. For the first time, Cheng Yian noticed an unrelenting solitude in his tall frame. She went back to the daybed, lacing her fingers with his pale ones, "Apart from Baiyin Mountain, is there anything else you haven't told me?"

Lu Xusheng's dark eyes were like deep abysses, "No."

"I'm asking you one last time, is there anything else you're hiding from me?"

Seeing her seriousness, Lu Xusheng smiled slightly this time, looking over, "Really, there's nothing else..."

Cheng Yian's eyes welled up, slowly pulling his hand over, and finally embracing him tightly.