Chapter 073: Zombies x Slap in the Face x Anatomy (19)

Chapter 073: Zombies x Slap in the Face x Anatomy (19)

Amid the piercing screams, Keding’s voice strained to match the documentary-style narration, delivering a voiceover with precise and proper enunciation.

"Ancient face threading is the crystallization of the wisdom and sweat of the working people."

"Thin cotton threads are looped into a figure-eight slipknot, removing every single hair." Keding clasped his hands together in front of his chest, wearing a solemn expression: "Every. Single. Hair. Oh."

The system saw Jin Mingmao and Kong Fengjiang both sprawled on the sofa, their legs kicking as the burly men worked on them, and couldn’t help but wonder: "It's just cotton threads, why are they screaming so miserably..."

Keding: "Well, it's live pulling. Want to give it a try?"

System: "No thanks, I think natural beauty is just fine!"

Fortunately, the two recipients of this free service still had body hair, sweat hair, eyebrows, and beards.

The two African bodyguards provided them with an all-encompassing beauty treatment. While JERRY used cotton threads to scrape, TOM applied wax for hair removal.

The entire block of wax was slathered on their thighs, clumping together the thick leg hair, and then—

"Swoosh!!"

"Ahhhhhh—"

"Don't move." The African big brother enunciated clearly: "A fine appearance is basic male virtue. Your male virtue is close to zero right now."

Jin Mingmao shouted: "He Shuangqiu! Let me down! He Shuangqiu!!!"

The person in question was out of service range, having gone downstairs to eat some barbecue.

After two hours of beauty treatments, the usual routine followed—a slap with a stick followed by a sweet reward, just enough to keep the scum from being pulverized but not enough to kill their desire to continue causing trouble.

Because of this, they were led by the African bodyguards to the middle-level bathhouse, where they enjoyed a comfortable hot bath.

In the second before entering the bathhouse, Jin Mingmao was still on edge, every inch of his skin stinging.

What’s next? Are they going to dunk me in chili water?

Unexpectedly, the two large porcelain jars in the bathhouse contained perfectly temperate bathwater, with essential oils and flower petals available for use.

Kong Fengjiang was equally wary until he relaxed after a comfortable soak of fifteen minutes.

Water resources in the base were limited, and everyone usually bathed for only three to five minutes. The water wouldn’t get very hot, and it would automatically shut off once the time was up.

The two scoundrels, previously in pain from the wax hair removal, finally relaxed completely and even had the mood to examine each other's skin.

"You know what, it actually looks whiter?"

"That Black guy must have trained in Guangzhou. His technique is quite authentic!"

"I'm over thirty years old, and this is the first time I've had my arm hair removed... Look, it's really smooth, huh?"

"You know what, being a woman is quite a suffering. No matter how good it looks, I’m never doing it again."

The two indulged in a thorough wash, not only scrubbing themselves meticulously but also slapping essential oils all over their bodies.

After the bath, the African bodyguards waited outside the door, handing them smooth silk pajamas.

Kong Fengjiang was quite pleased: "This is the life a person should live!"

"Deputy Commander Jin, when you fully take over, I wonder how much I can benefit?"

Flattered, Jin Mingmao smiled and said, "I wasn’t thoughtful enough in my previous words. You’re my strategist. Promotions and honors will come!"

The two African big brothers sent them in expressionless, locking the door behind them.

He Shuangqiu had just finished his bath as well, wearing loose and comfortable pajamas, sipping wine in a relaxed state.

Jin Mingmao and Kong Fengjiang had already reached a consensus earlier—don’t provoke or stimulate him. After returning to the commander’s room, Jin Mingmao went to the study to review a condensed report on the base sent by his deputy.

The more comprehensive the grasp of these confidential informations, the better, especially if one aimed to be the top leader. At the very least, one should know the amount of arms reserves, overall defensive strength, and the intensity of external threats.

Jin Mingmao was engrossed in the document, though he only half understood many things. He called Kong Fengjiang to join him, and the two gradually found a fleeting sense of dominating the world through their discussion.

As they chatted, two hands silently landed on their shoulders.

Startled, Kong Fengjiang turned his head to see He Shuangqiu smiling at him with a raspy voice.

"Baby," He Shuangqiu’s voice was low and intimate: "After working so hard, come rest properly with me."

"W-w-what are you doing!" Kong Fengjiang’s skin crawled with goosebumps: "The man for you is the one next to me! I only like women with big, beautiful breasts. Don’t mess with me!"

"Playing another little trick of feigned reluctance?" He Shuangqiu said indulgently: "He’s mine. But aren’t you also mine?"

With that, he shook his palm, and a string of condoms slid out from his sleeve.

"Babies, how about we finish all these today?"

Jin Mingmao, who had been finding Kong Fengjiang’s reaction amusing, suddenly felt a bit of interest. After all, there hadn’t been any opportunities to indulge, not before or after the apocalypse, and He Shuangqiu was barely passable.

"Alright, let's go to the bedroom and have some fun," he said half-persuading, half-teasing: "Are you clean?"

He Shuangqiu countered: "Are you clean?"

Jin Mingmao froze for a moment, watching He Shuangqiu lock the study door.

"Wait, I’m the top, remember?"

"If you want to seduce me, just say so," He Shuangqiu said lightly: "Pretending to look at documents, aren’t you just waiting to hook me in the study?"

"Come on, both of my little darlings, stick your butts out and lie down properly on the desk."

Kong Fengjiang could no longer hold back and rushed forward in one swift step to open the door of the study, barking fiercely, "Don't even think about making a move on me!! I only like women, I'm telling you again!!"

Jin Mingmao was still a bit dazed amidst the chaos and was already being lifted to have his pajama hem pulled up, a sudden surge of fear rising in his heart.

"He Shuangqiu!! You've gone mad, but there's a limit!! When have I ever been the submissive one?!?"

The latter remained calm and composed, greatly pleased by their intense reactions.

All this posturing, all this playing hard to get.

With both of them so eager to vie for my attention, what am I supposed to do?

Kong Fengjiang, fearing for his virtue, had never been intimate with a man in his entire life. He rushed into the bedroom, trying to block the door with the desk and bookcase, almost locking Jin Mingmao outside in the process.

The two of them hid together in the inner room, blocking the door with various objects, their faces still showing lingering fear.

Only after confirming it was safe did Kong Fengjiang start cursing violently, asking, "Does He Shuangqiu have any dirty diseases?"

Jin Mingmao's expression changed abruptly: "What are you talking about?"

"Is he fooling around outside? Never mind, you probably wouldn't know anyway." Kong Fengjiang said impatiently, "I felt so disgusted when he touched my arm a few times that I almost threw up. I don't know if the zombie virus can be transmitted this way. If it is, you'll die in this room too, do you understand?"

"What nonsense are you talking about?" Jin Mingmao retorted, "Liking men isn't being perverted. You're acting as scared as a maiden, don't you find it amusing?"

"Yes," Kong Fengjiang said with a gloomy expression, "You're not perverted at all, it's just that you can't have children and stab each other, when has God ever acknowledged men being together?"

Caught off guard by the sudden scolding, Jin Mingmao's voice immediately rose: "You're not even bothering to pretend anymore, are you? You were flattering me while I was taking a bath, and you think I don't know how fake your words were?!"

Both found each other repulsive, and after a direct and violent altercation, they dragged their beds as far apart as possible and went to sleep.

In the deep of the night, Kong Fengjiang felt a chill on his back and instinctively reached for the quilt.

"What's going on..."

A hand was placed in the center of his back.

"My dear," He Shuangqiu said tenderly, "Arch your back, I'll make sure you enjoy this thoroughly."

Kong Fengjiang practically catapulted out of bed, his head nearly hitting the ceiling.

He let out a sharp, siren-like wail and turned on all the lights.

"You pervert! You're disgusting! Stay away from me!!"

When it came to his dignity, power and reputation meant nothing compared to his butt! He was determined to defend his butt with his life!

As Kong Fengjiang was losing his mind, Jin Mingmao successfully woke up, only to find that he couldn't move anymore.

His hands were tied to the bedpost, and his face was pressed into the pillow, making it impossible to see what was happening behind him.

Damn it, when did this madman sneak in?!

How could he bind me so silently? Has this room been sprayed with some kind of fog?!

At that moment, Kong Fengjiang was rampaging through the bedroom like a berserk spider, trying to throw everything he could reach at He Shuangqiu's face. He was also screaming for help at the camera, his voice hoarse.

He Shuangqiu dodged smoothly and said, "Forced love, huh?"

"I quite like it," He Shuangqiu licked his lips and said, "If you don't like this natural merging, I can prepare water and food for you instead."

"Baby," his voice rumbled like a camel's burp, "How do you want to offer yourself to me? Hmm?"

"Don't come near me!! Whatever you want, just name it!!" Kong Fengjiang raised a clothes rod in desperate self-defense, "Make a deal, I don't want to be touched by a man! If you insist on doing something to me, let's die together! Neither of us will survive!"

"Going this far, huh." He Shuangqiu blinked and said, "Actually, I'm kind of bored of it too."

Kong Fengjiang was stunned for a moment, not understanding what he meant.

"Nowadays, it seems to be all about AA love? OO love?"

Kong Fengjiang, as if listening to alien language, stuttered, "W-what are you talking about?"

Jin Mingmao was nearly suffocating from the pillow and, due to his physical restraints, couldn't turn around, "Is there an on-off switch for his personality change? Even being a woman would be better than this pervert!"

"I mean, how about you go and taste how delicious Mingmao is?" He Shuangqiu said with a grin, dangling a string of condoms in front of him, "I don't mind my two darlings playing with each other. As long as you're both happy, I, as the top, will naturally be happy too."

Jin Mingmao, who had just been struggling to free himself from the ropes, was momentarily dumbfounded and let out a desperate cry for help.

"Bro! Kong! You have to remember you're straight!! Don't come near me!!"

For the ten thousandth time, Kong Fengjiang tried to twist open the damned door lock, only to realize he had three choices now.

1. Jump off the balcony.

2. Be violated in body and soul by He Shuangqiu.

3. Violate Jin Mingmao's body and soul.

As Kong Fengjiang, as if possessed, drew closer and closer to Jin Mingmao, He Shuangqiu applauded with a satisfied expression on his face.

Jin Mingmao was going crazy, "Don't come near me!! Don't come near me!!"