Chapter 60

Chapter 60

The touch was warm, and as the tears burst upon his skin, Rong Tang felt a slight burning sensation.

He blinked reflexively, his eyes finally adjusting to the dim surroundings.

Su Huaijing's eyes closed, the corners reddened, as tears continued to fall uncontrollably, some dripping off his chin, others merging into droplets on Rong Tang's face.

Drop by drop, each one searingly hot and profoundly real.

The beauty under the lamp approached, his eyelashes dense, his nose proud, and his lips and tongue warm, exploring his mouth as if anesthetized, gently yet irresistibly invading.

With warmth numbing the senses, sweeping away the bitter taste, yet firmly and aggressively not allowing Rong Tang any retreat.

A hand moved from the arm to the waist, outside the gentle wind blew, stars and earthly lights intertwined. Cicadas boisterously sang of survival after calamity. Rong Tang gradually lost oxygen, the scene before his eyes turning into dazzling halos, almost feeling a sense of drowning.

He unconsciously opened his mouth to breathe, giving Su Huaijing a sign to advance. The hand on his waist tightened, bringing their bodies closer. Rong Tang, in his daze, felt Su Huaijing's hand moving, seemingly wanting to slip beneath his clothes.

It was only when a sudden barrier emerged that Rong Tang snapped back to reality. Just as he was about to push away, Su Huaijing had already let go, stepping back. Rong Tang's hand, raised halfway, froze in mid-air.

He stared blankly at Su Huaijing, his mind still in a haze.

The antagonist's eyes were red, even slightly swollen, tears stopped, but his eyes looked pitiful, increasingly resembling a dog, his lips bright red, glistening suspiciously.

Rong Tang was stunned for a long time, finally comprehending what had just happened. He lowered his hand silently, looking down briefly before averting his gaze.

“……”

Well-developed.

Also quick to rise.

Should he be commended for retreating in time?

But... why still hard while crying?

Rong Tang found it quite puzzling.

He even slightly furrowed his brows, drifting into a daze until his tongue became unbearably numb. He lowered his head, his tongue gently circling in his mouth, trying to alleviate the slightly bitter numbness.

It was outrageous.

Truly outrageous.

Initially in Yong'an Lane, he had worried about showing Su Huaijing the storybooks, fearing they might corrupt the great antagonist. Yet it seemed this 'child' he had been treating had long since learned to kiss without his knowledge.

And moreover, it seemed there was a significant issue with his orientation?

Rong Tang found himself with many more questions that night and wished he could travel back in time to prevent himself from seeking out Su Huaijing upon waking up.

Because he wasn't sure how to face Su Huaijing now.

He was the one who had been kissed forcefully, the one he had viewed as a 'child' was the one 'offending' him, yet his mind went blank, unsure how to communicate with Su Huaijing.

He began to ponder where things had gone wrong.

Rong Tang pursed his lips, only to suddenly feel a subtle sting, the sensation of being sucked on was vivid, almost instantly triggering a flashback the moment their lips touched.

Rong Tang involuntarily opened his mouth slightly.

The bitterness and heat from the medicinal soup were replaced by another, more secretive, tart sensation. Beyond his confusion, Rong Tang felt a tinge of regret.

After all, he was a university student and had lived two extra lifetimes. His life experience far exceeded that of the seventeen-year-old young antagonist, yet... yet he had been kissed so thoroughly that he was caught off guard, even feeling a bit weak in the knees.

Just as Rong Tang was about to scold, he met Su Huaijing's eyes, red and swollen like a rabbit's. Instead of scolding, he found himself instinctively wanting to comfort him.

But this shouldn't be the case. He should be asking Su Huaijing what he was thinking, why he made such an outrageous move, and why he became aroused towards him.

Yet, he couldn’t bring himself to ask.

Rong Tang swallowed, his throat dry, hesitated for a moment, then opened his mouth: “Su—”

“Tangtang,” Su Huaijing interrupted him, his voice as gentle and warm as usual, only slightly hoarse in its depths.

Rong Tang paused, forcing himself not to look at Su Huaijing’s physiological reaction, focusing only on his face.

Su Huaijing’s eyes curved into a pitiful smile. If he went to Yu Jing's brothel, he'd likely cause all the nobles to spend fortunes for his attention.

Who could bear to see him cry?

His phoenix eyes reddened, his skin as white as spring snow, bathed in the warm candlelight; anyone would be moved by him.

Rong Tang’s heart skipped a beat, wanting to look away, but Su Huaijing asked, “Do you dislike me, Tangtang?”

“？”

Confused, Rong Tang paused for a moment: “Why would you ask that?”

He thought his question was harmless, but unknowingly hit a nerve in Su Huaijing, who blinked slowly, his lashes casting shadows, his naturally proud head slightly lowered, looking quite dejected: “So, you do dislike me.”

Rong Tang: “???”

He was extremely surprised, hearing Su Huaijing, with open eyes, twist his words: “If you didn’t dislike me, you wouldn’t have asked why.”

Rong Tang: "...Can you act normal for once?"

Su Huaijing blinked, seemingly genuinely puzzled: "Where am I not normal?"

Rong Tang: "...?" Where are you normal at all!

His gaze involuntarily drifted downwards, and Su Huaijing followed suit, not feeling embarrassed at all, instead asking frankly: "Does Tangtang think this is abnormal?"

Rong Tang turned his face away, remaining silent, though he really wanted to nod.

But Su Huaijing seemed increasingly confused, persistently stepping in front of Rong Tang, earnestly asking: "Why is it abnormal?"

Rong Tang, just kissed breathless by him, felt weak in his limbs and found himself cornered in the kitchen, being interrogated. He felt the heat rising to his ears.

"How is this... normal?" He managed to counter-ask.

Su Huaijing naturally said: "You are my husband, I like you. It's perfectly normal and human for me to react when kissing you. How is that abnormal?"

He even glanced down at Rong Tang’s lower body: "It’s rather abnormal for Tangtang like this. But given your frailty and constant medication, it’s understandable you don’t get aroused. I don't blame you."

Hard... to get... aroused.

That's a rather polite way to put it!

Rong Tang’s face turned red with embarrassment, seizing on the most significant part of his statement: "Pretend husband."

A shadow flickered in Su Huaijing’s eyes, but his expression remained innocent, countering: "We went through a formal wedding, officially recognized as husband and wife. That's what Tangtang himself said."

Rong Tang was momentarily speechless, cursing Ke Hongxue in his mind for leading him into saying that!

Ha! The great antagonist has caught you in his trap now!

He frowned, assertively saying, "The premise was mutual benefit, a pretend marriage, which you agreed to."

"I've changed my mind," Su Huaijing replied softly.

The fire in the medicine stove gradually died down, and the empty medicine bowl rested on the stove. All traces were fading away, and even the bitter-sweet scent of the herbs in the air would soon vanish with the passing wind.

Tonight's events seemed unwitnessed, but a white moth flew in through the wooden window slats.

Rong Tang was rendered speechless, staring at Su Huaijing, hoping he had just misheard.

But Su Huaijing looked into his eyes and repeated, "I regret it."

A hint of bitterness lingered in his throat, perhaps from the medicine he'd just consumed. Rong Tang couldn't tell. Unusually, Su Huaijing didn't take his hand but stood still, speaking slowly and seriously, insisting on being understood: "Rong Tang, I regret it."

Rong Tang was stunned, realizing it might be the first time he had addressed him by his name.

"I don't want to be pretend spouses with you, nor do I want to wait for you to grow to like me. You said it was love at first sight for me; I'll take your word for it. Now it's my turn to develop feelings over time for you. Will you accept it?" Su Huaijing asked softly, seemingly seeking his opinion, yet his expression suggested otherwise.

Rong Tang struggled to gather his thoughts, feeling as if everything had gone off track since he stepped into the kitchen tonight.

Su Huaijing had told him not to come closer across the medicine stove, and he should have obeyed.

He had always been so obedient before.

Rong Tang cleared his throat, trying to calm down and regain his rationality. He took a half step back, distancing himself from Su Huaijing, and raised his eyes to meet his in the dim candlelight.

A moth flew over their heads, circling to test the warmth of the candle flame.

Rong Tang asked, "Why?"

"What answer do you want to hear?" Su Huaijing chuckled lightly, his fingers hanging by his side, habitually resting where his waist token usually was. "You already know the answer, Tangtang. Why ask me? Is it disbelief, or do you want me to say it again?"

"I'm handsome, smart, gentle, patient, considerate... don't you like me, Tangtang?"

"I'm growing fonder of you, Tangtang."

"As long as you're happy, that's all that matters."

-“……”

Each word was sincere, not pretense or acting. The speaker was earnest, the listener oblivious. Only now did everything click into place, revealing the truth behind their words and actions.

Su Huaijing took a step forward, slightly easing the frustration caused by Rong Tang's retreat.

He remained gentle, his eyes filled with deep affection visible only for Rong Tang: "Tangtang, I say I like you, but you never believe me."

"I thought I could wait for you to believe me. You're two years older than me; surely you wouldn't remain clueless forever. But now, I don't want to wait anymore."

"We are spouses, my name is written in your family tree, right next to yours. Even in death, we're destined to be buried together. Why can't I like you?"

A moth flew into the candle flame, its wings instantly creating a wisp of white smoke as the tiny creature panicked and tried to flee.

Su Huaijing tilted his head slightly, looking puzzled into Rong Tang's eyes, stubbornly seeking an answer.

Rong Tang was stunned for a long time, then said with difficulty, "I won't live long."

Su Huaijing replied lightly, "I'll be buried with you."

Rong Tang was shocked, his eyes wide in disbelief.

Su Huaijing reached out, once again clasping Rong Tang's hand in his own, his eyes reddened but smiling, "I still have some things to do. If fate allows, and you accompany me till then, whenever you leave, I'll join you in burial. But if... fate really despises me and denies even this small request, then, Tangtang, wait for me in the afterlife. After I finish my tasks, I'll come find you, and we can cross the Naihe Bridge together, hand in hand."

Outside, the wind grew stronger, hinting at an approaching rain; inside, the candle flickered as a moth, half of its wings burnt, stubbornly crashed into it again until it turned to ash.

Rong Tang's heart pounded violently in his chest, as if it would burst.

He stood frozen for a long time, finally speaking in a hoarse voice, "Su Huaijing, do you realize what you're doing?"

Like a moth to a flame, courting self-destruction.

Su Huaijing chuckled softly, his youthful beauty captivating, like a celestial being under the moon.

He gently lowered his head, capturing Rong Tang's lips in a tender peck: "I know."

"I am courting you."