Chapter 37 Returning to the Initial Distance

Chapter 37: Reverting to Their Original Distance

Gu Shiying had known about Fu Huan's feelings for him much earlier than Fu Huan realized.

But he never expected Fu Huan to confront him about it at this moment.

Admittedly, Fu Huan’s affection had become particularly overt recently—so much so that it was difficult for Gu Shiying to feign ignorance. He had even consciously avoided interactions with Fu Huan, though some subconscious evasions and glances were impossible to conceal.

It took Gu Shiying only three seconds to deduce how Fu Huan knew about his awareness of the crush. Fu Huan was even privy to minor details, like Gu Shiying skipping the cafeteria to snack in his dorm—a testament to his meticulous observation. Gu Shiying’s recent attempts to evade Fu Huan couldn't possibly have gone unnoticed.

Fu Huan was more sensitive and perceptive than Gu Shiying had initially thought.

Perhaps Gu Shiying had grown accustomed to hearing Fu Huan’s inner thoughts—listening without needing to respond, merely processing them internally. Just as he was nearly convincing himself to adapt, Fu Huan abruptly brought his secret admiration into the open, confronting him directly. He was no longer secretly pining; he was laying all his cards on the table.

Gu Shiying was caught completely off guard.

His grip on the door handle tightened involuntarily, his palm growing sweaty with nervousness.

“Wh-what?” Gu Shiying couldn’t bring himself to meet Fu Huan’s gaze. He knew the intensity of Fu Huan’s stare; meeting it would only leave him more flustered.

But Fu Huan reiterated even more clearly: “I like you, Gu Shiying.”

There was no escaping it now.

Had they not been confined in the enclosed space of the car, Gu Shiying might have found an excuse to pretend he hadn't heard, perhaps scurrying back to his dorm to bury his head in the sand like an ostrich.

Fu Huan knew him well—he had chosen to confess in the closed, soundproof car.

Why couldn’t Fu Huan hold back? What had gone wrong?

Gu Shiying didn’t know how to respond. He pressed his lips together, one hand gripping the handle, the other clutching his clothes—the very outfit Fu Huan had bought him yesterday. It suddenly dawned on him: they had worn matching pajamas last night, and today, matching clothes. In other words, they were wearing couple’s outfits.

Perhaps Fu Huan hadn’t expected an immediate response from Gu Shiying either. He had mentally prepared himself for this moment.

“I know you’re aware of my feelings. Since you already know I’m gay, I don’t want to pretend around you anymore.”

“I’m sorry if I’ve caused you discomfort.”

Gu Shiying sighed softly. “I thought we could be friends.” He hadn’t expected Fu Huan’s confession to come so abruptly.

Fu Huan was taken aback. He hadn’t anticipated Gu Shiying responding so quickly, and Gu Shiying didn't seem frightened by his sudden confession.

He lowered his head, unconsciously digging his nails into his palm, barely registering the pain.

“Because I like you, I can’t just be friends. I wanted to tell you—my intentions toward you are not merely platonic.”

After a brief pause, Fu Huan emphasized again, “Gu Shiying, I’m sorry, but I can’t just be friends with you.” In truth, he was also saying this to himself.

He had fantasized countless times about confessing to Gu Shiying: presenting flowers like in a romantic drama, a forceful confession like in a domineering CEO novel, or slowly revealing his feelings atop a building.

However, all those fantasies were discarded after Gu Shiying hadn’t been angry about him following yesterday. Gu Shiying had given him courage, bringing his crush into reality.

The Gu Shiying he liked was the real, vibrant Gu Shiying—not the idealized version in his imagination. Only through interaction did he realize how much more he liked him than he’d thought.

He couldn’t hold back any longer. First, he wanted to tell Gu Shiying how he felt without regrets. Second, he couldn’t move forward if Gu Shiying couldn’t accept him—their interactions would have to cease. The thought of Gu Shiying someday dating a girl, marrying, and having children was more than he could bear.

He thought it would drive him crazy.

Gu Shiying couldn’t give Fu Huan an answer, and Fu Huan understood this. “Fu Huan, I…”

Click.

The car door unlocked.

The bitterness on Fu Huan’s face was unmistakable, his voice strained. “You must not have slept well last night. Go back and get some rest.”

Gu Shiying nodded silently.

Of course, he knew the one who truly needed rest was Fu Huan.

The sudden confession left Gu Shiying feeling that anything he said would be wrong.

Fu Huan’s confession was nothing like his inner thoughts.

It didn’t feel like a confession—more like laying his feelings bare, explaining his thoughts without expecting any affirmation or hopeful response.

The boldness Gu Shiying had sensed in Fu Huan’s inner thoughts was completely at odds with the despair he displayed outwardly.

Gu Shiying felt Fu Huan’s despair.

A confession without hope of reciprocation was essentially a tragedy.

They had had such a good time together just yesterday. Wouldn’t it have been better to remain friends? Couldn’t friends still enjoy each other’s company?

Gu Shiying thought with genuine regret.

He got out of the car, closed the door quietly, and slowly walked upstairs. He tried to act composed, but he wasn’t as indifferent as he seemed. Unlike the times when girls had confessed to him and he’d immediately started thinking about the next math exam, this time was different.

The car behind Gu Shiying turned on its headlights. Fu Huan didn’t return to the dorm—he left.

That day was extraordinary for someone; that night, someone was destined to toss and turn.

Exam week began at the university.

The elective exams came first, and Gu Shiying finished them effortlessly, even earning praise from his teacher for his rapid improvement.

“Ying Er, your swimming speed is nearly as fast as mine. Fu Huan really taught you well.”

Zhang Zhi knew that Fu Huan had been teaching Gu Shiying—whenever Gu Shiying wasn’t eating with him, he was usually with Fu Huan.

Gu Shiying’s smile stiffened, his tone subdued. “He is indeed very capable.”

Zhang Zhi asked, “Why haven’t you been with him these past couple of days?”

Gu Shiying replied, “We’re roommates, but we each have our own commitments. With exams approaching, everyone’s busy.”

Zhang Zhi didn’t overthink it. Rubbing his shoulders, he suggested, “Want to go to the library tonight? I’ll grab seats early. If I don’t start reviewing, I’ll fail this semester.”

Without hesitation, Gu Shiying agreed. “Sure.”

Since Fu Huan’s confession, Gu Shiying wasn’t sure if Fu Huan had returned to the dorm, but the two hadn’t seen each other. They had reverted to how they were before Gu Shiying could hear Fu Huan’s inner thoughts.

If they couldn’t be friends, all that remained was being roommates.

Gu Shiying didn’t want their relationship to become so strained, but he had no choice—it was Fu Huan’s decision, and he had to respect it. Moreover, he couldn’t continue enjoying Fu Huan’s kindness, especially when it came with special intentions. Neither Fu Huan nor Gu Shiying could bear that.

For now, maintaining distance was the best outcome—exactly what Gu Shiying had originally wanted. Still, the sudden drastic change in their relationship required some adjustment on his part.

That evening, Zhang Zhi went to the library early to secure seats after dinner. Gu Shiying returned to the dorm to grab his tablet before heading to the library.

"Zhang Zhi: Come quick, there's aloe vera coconut water, your favorite."

"Zhang Zhi: [image.jpg]"

"Gu Shiying: Be right there."

Zhang Zhi actually ordered the aloe vera coconut water he'd recently taken a liking to—not bad, he's actually observant.

When Gu Shiying found the seat Zhang Zhi had saved, he spotted Liang Qi sitting nearby, who waved at him.

Zhang Zhi said in a hushed voice, "What a coincidence, our Liang-ge also happened to grab a spot here. This aloe vera coconut water is on him."

Liang Qi wagged his index finger: "No no no, not on me—Brother Huan bought it. He’s been buying several cups a day lately, and when he can’t finish them, he has me take care of them."

Gu Shiying looked silently at the light green aloe vera coconut water in front of him, droplets forming on the cup from the rising temperature.

Liang Qi also pointed behind Gu Shiying: "Hey, look, the real generous one is here."

Gu Shiying turned around and met Fu Huan’s gaze. The latter hesitated mid-step before approaching, then without a word, sat down in the seat next to Gu Shiying. So the book and the other cup of aloe vera coconut water placed beside him were Fu Huan’s.

The two hadn’t seen each other for four days.

In an instant, they’d gone from familiar roommates to complete strangers. Gu Shiying didn’t know how to face Fu Huan, so he fell silent.

He hadn’t considered changing seats—it wasn't like he'd just discovered Fu Huan’s feelings. And actually, he knew even more than Fu Huan realized.

The library became their excuse for not talking, allowing them to focus on studying for exams.

Gu Shiying read for a while, then put on headphones to watch a video, wanting to take notes. He realized he hadn’t brought a pen and was about to ask Zhang Zhi when a pen appeared on his right side—Fu Huan had pushed it over, but he didn’t look at Gu Shiying at all.

Gu Shiying didn't make a fuss either; he picked up the pen and used it. He’d even drunk the coconut water, so borrowing a pen was no big deal.

Liang Qi and Fu Huan didn’t stay long at the library, leaving around nine. Gu Shiying and Zhang Zhi stayed until ten. When Gu Shiying packed up to return to the dorm, he looked at the pen still in his hand and smiled wryly.

Leaving the library, Zhang Zhi rubbed his stomach: "Ying Er, I’m hungry."

Gu Shiying hadn’t eaten much for dinner and was also a bit hungry: "Want to go to the supermarket for some oden?"

Zhang Zhi threw an arm around Gu Shiying’s shoulder: "Let’s go, let’s go!"

Gu Shiying shook off his hand: "It’s so hot, don't hang on me."

Zhang Zhi: "What’s wrong with that? What’s wrong with a little hug? Can’t good bros hug?"

Gu Shiying rolled his eyes: "Get lost, you reek of sweat." Fu Huan always smelled nice—he could now understand why girls complained about guys smelling bad.

Zhang Zhi sniffed himself: "Where? This is manly aroma."

Gu Shiying still wouldn’t let Zhang Zhi walk pressed against him: "Go back and take a good shower; your crush would like you more." So he also preferred cleaner buddies.

Zhang Zhi clicked his tongue, shaking his head: "Why are you acting like that guy, all of a sudden so obsessed with cleanliness?"

This made Gu Shiying’s heart skip a beat, but he still laughed and kicked Zhang Zhi: "Get out of here, I’ve always been clean."

However, as the two walked away, they didn’t realize that from a car parked nearby, a pair of eyes closely followed Gu Shiying’s retreating figure.

He murmured softly: "Gu Shiying."

After the two-week exam period ended, the sweltering summer heat arrived, along with the long-awaited summer break for college students.

Some students stayed at school to work part-time, while others went straight home after exams.

In dorm 504, Yang Shuhang was the first to finish his exams. He left school a week early to participate in a reality show. Fu Huan hadn't been coming back to stay, leaving only Guan Yu and Gu Shiying.

They left on the same day—Guan Yu took a morning flight home, and Gu Shiying had an afternoon high-speed train ticket.

Gu Shiying did a final check of the items he needed to bring and hesitated when he saw the GoPro on the desk, debating whether to take it home. In the end, he stuffed it into his suitcase.

Fu Huan could completely avoid him after all. If they couldn't be friends, then that was that.

After checking the dorm’s water and electricity, he locked the door and dragged his suitcase to the high-speed train station.

Just as he went downstairs, he ran into Liang Qi, twirling his car keys.

Liang Qi asked casually, "Heading home?"

Gu Shiying: "Yeah."

Liang Qi: "High-speed train or airport?"

Gu Shiying: "I’m going to the high-speed train station."

Liang Qi: "Great, I'm headed that way. Let me give you a ride."

Gu Shiying smiled and declined: "Thanks, but no need. I’ve called a DiDi."

Liang Qi: "Alright then, safe travels."

Since Fu Huan had decided to avoid him, he would respect that decision—maintaining distance in every aspect, returning to how they were originally, like two parallel lines.

The moment Gu Shiying’s figure disappeared, someone stepped out from behind the school bus stop.

Liang Qi: "He knows."

Fu Huan: "Mm."

Liang Qi: "Don’t cry—I won’t comfort you."

Fu Huan: "Get lost."

Author’s note: Fu Huan: My wife doesn’t want me anymore!!! [crying][crying][crying][crying][crying]