Chapter 38 Whoever You Love Is Doomed

Chapter 38: Cursed by Your Love

The news of Lin Juangui’s kidnapping should have spread like wildfire across the Star Network, but Liang Shanyue was doing everything in his power to suppress it, ensuring the incident wouldn’t escalate.

However, Mu Zhang had no intention of letting him succeed. The Star Network was never short of netizens eager to stir up drama.

Yao Zhi was already in police custody. He remained tight-lipped, revealing little about Liang Shanyue’s involvement and claiming he had simply been led astray.

When Lin Juangui had previously discussed his symptoms at the school counseling office, Yao Zhi had interpreted it as an invitation. Later, when Lin Juangui switched psychologists, Yao Zhi became even more convinced that Lin Juangui was playing hard to get.

Naturally, this was compounded by jealousy and resentment towards a newly appointed colleague. So, Yao Zhi bribed Lin Juangui’s pilot, instructing him to divert the aircraft to a designated location.

Yao Zhi’s account of the crime contained significant inconsistencies. For instance, the bribed pilot vanished completely after the incident. The aircraft’s surveillance system had been damaged long ago, and tranquilizing incense, potent enough to induce deep sleep, was found at the scene.

With Lin Juangui unconscious for an extended period, he, as the victim, couldn’t provide any further useful information. Logically, since Yao Zhi had confessed, the case should have proceeded according to standard procedures. However, Liang Shanyue continued to pressure the police, insisting they wait until Lin Juangui regained consciousness to personally identify Yao Zhi.

Since Liang Shanyue was so determined to make things difficult, Mu Zhang, as Lin Juangui’s partner, was not about to let it go easily.

Ge Miao provided the police with two audio recordings. The conversations clearly featured Liang Shanyue and Yao Zhi, and their relationship appeared to extend beyond mere ambiguity. Furthermore, Liang Shanyue’s words to Yao Zhi in the recordings were highly suggestive.

"Since he’s so adept at these games, and you enjoy being played, let’s see if he takes a liking to you. An Omega like him isn’t as easily fooled as you imagine—have you forgotten whose partner he is?"

For many Omegas, Betas were considered useless without pheromones. Only Liang Shanyue would keep Yao Zhi around for his "special skills."

Even if Liang Shanyue refused to admit he instructed Yao Zhi to kidnap Lin Juangui, his affair with Yao Zhi was now an undeniable fact.

Consequently, Liang Shanyue’s team scrambled to manage the public narrative surrounding their employer. While the news of Yao Zhi’s kidnapping of Lin Juangui couldn’t be suppressed, the counseling office at Yungang Business College was temporarily closed for internal review.

Liang Shanyue was furious. Since Mu Zhang had no shame, he decided to add more fuel to the fire—such as insinuations about why Lin Juangui suffered from psychological issues.

Lin Juangui was completely unaware that, while he slept, he had once again become headline news. He was a pawn in a power struggle between two factions, and topics like whether his marriage to Mu Zhang triggered his psychological problems were dragged out for discussion again. The cyber-citizens of the Star Network reveled in the gossip.

Compared to the online commotion, the floating island had been eerily quiet during this period.

Logically, Lin Juangui waking up should have been good news, but he seemed like a completely different person—indifferent to those around him and the world. His smile was gone, and his eyes lacked their former light, a sight that sent shivers down one’s spine.

When Song Jie was first summoned by Mu Zhang, she was already concerned. Although Lin Juangui claimed to get along well with his "other self," Song Jie’s intuition told her he was still holding back.

After hearing Mu Zhang’s assistant recount Lin Juangui’s ordeal, she took a deep breath. This was undoubtedly the most challenging moment of her career.

"Do you have a way to wake him?" Mu Zhang’s tone wasn’t overtly threatening, but the oppressive aura of his authority was something few could withstand.

Fortunately, Song Jie, a psychologist with years of experience, managed to maintain her composure in front of Mu Zhang.

She suggested trying hypnosis on Lin Juangui. Mu Zhang, unfamiliar with psychological disorders, looked perplexed after hearing her suggestion. "Isn’t he already asleep? Why would he need hypnosis?"

"...You can consider it a form of psychological suggestion. Although he is currently asleep, he still retains some awareness of the outside world. I will guide him deeply, helping him have pleasant dreams and not be tormented by fragmented memories."

Something in Song Jie’s words seemed to touch a raw nerve with Mu Zhang. He simply grunted in acknowledgment before turning and leaving.

After that, Song Jie spent several hours each day gently guiding Lin Juangui. She also arranged for the Moth Orchid Lin Juangui had kept on Yungang to be brought to Luochen Manor and placed on the balcony outside his bedroom.

At first, it had no discernible effect. As Mu Zhang’s expression grew darker day by day, Song Jie urged him to be patient.

"His psychological issues are already very severe. He’s just good at masking them and enduring in silence. This time, he must have reached his limit—perhaps he’s tired and simply wants to sleep longer."

There was no need to elaborate on who he had been masking for and enduring. Mu Zhang knew all too well.

He urged Song Jie to do everything in her power to awaken Lin Juangui. "Your compensation will be more than generous."

Mu Zhang never imagined he would be so deeply concerned about an Omega.

For some reason, Mu Zhang’s previous aversion to Omegas had vanished. Perhaps Lin Juangui’s current state reminded him of Bai Qujing.

It was that same feeling of helplessness, of being unable to do anything.

When Bai Qujing was critically ill, Mu Zhang knelt helplessly outside the operating room, pleading with her not to leave him. But in the end, she still passed away.

When he saw Bai Qujing’s lifeless face covered with a white cloth, Mu Zhang initially felt grief. Slowly, however, he was consumed by hatred.

Perhaps it was at that moment that Mu Zhang began to despise Omegas—a resentment born of his mother’s perceived weakness and a bitterness towards fate itself.

But this prejudice only brought him more pain.

Before manipulating Lin Juangui, Mu Zhang never expected such a strong reaction. Originally, he only needed Lin Juangui to "accidentally" discover Yao Zhi and Liang Shanyue’s affair, then leverage the situation to his advantage.

However, as events unfolded, he realized that Lin Juangui was more useful than he had imagined, and Lin Juangui’s cooperation was flawless.

Mu Zhang saw an opportunity to gain even more advantages through Lin Juangui and acted without a second thought.

But he never asked for Lin Juangui’s opinion, nor did he ever explain his motives.

If Lin Juangui had been any less astute, he might not have escaped from someone like Yao Zhi.

Mu Zhang didn’t dare dwell on it any longer. He took a deep breath, finally feeling remorse.

Mu Zhang never wanted to experience the pain of losing his mother again. Even though he knew he didn’t have strong feelings for Lin Juangui, he believed that someone like Lin Juangui deserved respect. The slap Lin Juangui gave him was well-earned, which was why he didn’t dodge it.

The hypnosis did have an effect on Lin Juangui. He no longer cried in his dreams, and after a period of calm, Mu Zhang finally saw him sleeping peacefully with a relaxed expression.

At the time, Song Jie explained to Mu Zhang, "It’s a positive sign that he can recall some happy memories under my guidance and find comfort in them. At least there’s still a glimmer of light for him to pursue. But how he will react to the harsh reality after waking up—I can’t guarantee anything."

"What do you mean?" Mu Zhang understood, but he needed a clear answer from Song Jie.

"If he wakes up, I will observe him carefully and report to you afterward."

Lin Juangui’s breakdown was silent.

Over the years, he had grown accustomed to masking his true emotions. He could quickly assess how to react to different people, and it had become second nature to him in surviving the professional world.

But no one would willingly experience that sense of powerlessness a second time. Although Lin Juangui had temporarily broken free from the nightmare of his past, he couldn’t casually tell Mu Zhang that it was all in the past, as he had done before.

It was precisely because of his concessions that Mu Zhang had come to see Lin Juangui as a spineless pushover, willing to sacrifice everything for Mu Zhang’s benefit.

Lin Juangui had thought Mu Zhang was capable of being decent, but Mu Zhang turned out to be anything but.

After waking up, Lin Juangui hadn’t seen Mu Zhang at all. His body had suffered from electric shocks, damaging both his muscles and internal organs. He required assistance to eat or drink. During the two weeks he spent bedridden, caregivers regularly came to massage him. Now, he had to start trying to move on his own.

Although Lin Juangui remained expressionless, showing no signs of joy or sorrow, he was diligent in his rehabilitation exercises.

He had known what to expect ever since he forced himself to endure the pain in the water cell. He would never use his own health as a bargaining chip against Mu Zhang.

On the fifth day, Lin Juangui was finally able to speak and slowly eat with a spoon.

But his spirits remained low, with not a trace of happiness on his face.

After the doctor finished examining Lin Juangui, Song Jie entered the room and smiled at him. "Look outside the window—that Moth Orchid is still blooming."

The balcony outside Lin Juangui's bedroom only held the Moth Orchid he had brought back from Song Jie earlier and a soft chair. It was unclear how long the blooming period of this Moth Orchid was, but it still had a few scattered blooms.

"I might not be able to take care of it myself anymore."

Previously, Lin Juangui would prune the branches, water it, and apply nutrient solution as Song Jie had taught him. That it was still blooming meant someone must have been tending to it.

Song Jie detected the regret in Lin Juangui's words and comforted him, saying, "It's alright. While you were asleep, your companion has been taking care of it."

"..."

Lin Juangui lowered his eyelashes and fell silent. The air around him seemed to grow several degrees colder, his expression no longer as calm as before, instead revealing a resistant coldness.

Song Jie knew she had stepped on a landmine and quickly shifted the topic, asking, "Did you see him in your dreams?"

The "him" referred, of course, to the other self Lin Juangui had mentioned, but the conversation had effectively ended the moment Song Jie brought up Mu Zhang.

Lin Juangui lowered his eyes and said in a dismissive tone, "Dr. Song, I know you were assigned to the academy by Mu Zhang. Because of your sudden, unexplained arrival, Yao Zhi was hostile toward you. You were a pawn deliberately used to provoke Yao Zhi's sense of crisis, and I was the bait Mu Zhang pushed forward. We worked together to provoke Yao Zhi's anger. The story I told Yao Zhi is completely different from the one I told you, and there is no other 'him'—I lied to you."

The Omega's face lacked the triumphant smile he had shown when facing Yao Zhi. He seemed to find everything tedious and couldn't be bothered to keep acting with Song Jie.

Lin Juangui said nothing more. Song Jie left the room with a complex expression, and when she went to report to Mu Zhang, the concern in her eyes was palpable.

She said to Mu Zhang, "I shouldn’t appear before him anymore. He—or rather, the other personality he has integrated—has a strong aversion to me. I could tell he wasn’t lying when he previously described his symptoms, but when he said he lied to me, it didn’t seem like he was just lashing out either."

"Integration?" Mu Zhang rarely showed such surprise, as if he'd heard something preposterous. "Dr. Song, are you sure your diagnosis is correct?"

"Since I was able to use hypnosis to awaken him, Mr. Mu, you should trust my professional judgment. Admittedly, it’s rash to make a diagnosis without instrumentation and based solely on my expertise, but he trusts no one now. To put it simply…"

Song Jie seemed reluctant to continue, pausing briefly before saying, "He has buried his vulnerable self. The Lin Juangui now is, to him, that ideal person who can offer guidance when he’s at a loss. How aggressive this personality might be is still unknown, and he hasn’t shared much with me. Perhaps from now on, Mr. Mu, you’ll have to treat him as a new Lin Juangui."

"Absurd."

It wasn’t that Mu Zhang didn’t believe Song Jie’s words—he simply didn’t want to face the outcome he had created.

He was the one who had pushed Lin Juangui to this point.

From the moment he targeted Lin Juangui for his pheromone traits and set a trap for him, to later sending Lin Juangui to push open the temple gate for the so-called sacred object of Bada Star, Mu Zhang had been determined and single-minded, driving a healthy person to this state.

Mu Zhang took a deep breath. His conscience had awakened briefly, but moments later, he felt he could still make amends.

He could treat Lin Juangui better and even cede some authority to him. Lin Juangui was clever—anything entrusted to him would be handled well, as long as Lin Juangui…

At this thought, Mu Zhang suddenly paused.

What did he want from Lin Juangui?

Clearly, Lin Juangui had exceeded his expectations in every way, yet Mu Zhang had relentlessly extracted value from him simply because he was an Omega—a type of person Mu Zhang despised. Wasn’t that too cruel to Lin Juangui?

Mu Zhang pondered this for a long time but couldn’t arrive at an answer that satisfied him.

These days, Mu Zhang had been handling official business at Luochen Manor. Liang Shanyue had publicly accused Mu Zhang of orchestrating everything, but the journalists, always eager for drama, only asked Liang Shanyue if he had truly committed adultery during his marriage.

Compared to how severe Lin Juangui’s psychological issues were or why Yao Zhi had targeted and kidnapped him, the media preferred chasing sensational gossip.

Although public opinion seemed under Mu Zhang’s control, Liang Shanyue undoubtedly had contingency plans. If he refused to yield to Mu Zhang, the two would inevitably battle to the death.

But none of this concerned Lin Juangui anymore. Mu Zhang would not use him for anything again.

Even Mu Zhang himself was surprised when this thought crossed his mind.

Mu Zhang admitted he was a profit-seeking villain, always evaluating others based on their utility first. But Lin Juangui had already given him so much—his pheromones alone were reason enough for Mu Zhang to provide for him indefinitely.

Yet, from beginning to end, Mu Zhang had never apologized to Lin Juangui. At most, he stood by the floor-to-ceiling window in his study, watching as Lin Juangui was wheeled around the garden by a servant to get some fresh air.

Lin Juangui’s skin was pale, and under the sunlight, he seemed almost translucent. He appeared weary and listless.

Mu Zhang had never seen such a detached, icy expression on Lin Juangui’s face. Most of the time, he had been smiling—even if it was fake, it was far better than this.

For some reason, Mu Zhang found himself missing the Lin Juangui of the past.

He thought he might be losing his mind.

As evening approached, Butler Yang was suddenly accompanied by several servants to see Mu Zhang. Noticing the bandage on Butler Yang’s head, Mu Zhang was puzzled until the servants began talking over each other to explain.

The situation was simple: Butler Yang had been hit by a falling object, and the culprit was Lin Juangui.

The Moth Orchid had been quietly pushed over the balcony by Lin Juangui just as Butler Yang passed below. The pot shattered, soil scattered everywhere, and Butler Yang’s head was left bleeding.

After the incident, no one dared confront Lin Juangui for an explanation because, after pushing the pot, he had simply lain down on the soft chair on the balcony and fallen asleep, as if without any apparent concern.

Knowing Mu Zhang hadn’t visited Lin Juangui during this time, Butler Yang was even less inclined to provoke him and could only swallow his grievances to report the matter.

When Mu Zhang asked how serious Butler Yang’s injury was, a servant replied, "Fortunately, the pot turned over as it fell and didn’t hit him directly, but the soil was hard and grazed his skin, causing a lot of bleeding. The doctor said he has a concussion and needs rest for a few days."

"You’ve suffered, Uncle Yang."

If Butler Yang hadn’t taken the hit, that pot might have landed on Mu Zhang himself.

Although Song Jie claimed Lin Juangui had developed a new personality, Mu Zhang still believed Lin Juangui was the same Lin Juangui.

The fact that Lin Juangui had turned a losing hand into a winning one proved he wasn’t someone who would be driven insane by psychological issues.

Like Lin Juangui, Mu Zhang was also waiting—for Lin Juangui’s anger to subside slightly before approaching him. By then, Lin Juangui should be calm enough to rationally consider what reparations to demand from Mu Zhang.

This flowerpot incident was Lin Juangui’s signal, and Mu Zhang got the message.

"Uncle Yang, follow the doctor’s orders and rest for a while. What about the flower?"

Butler Yang hadn’t expected Mu Zhang to react so calmly and instead inquire about the flower, which had likely been swept away somewhere.

He seemed to realize Lin Juangui’s current standing in Mu Zhang’s heart and, stopping his colleagues from speaking, answered personally, "We plan to transplant it to the back garden. Would you like to tend to it yourself?"

Mu Zhang murmured in agreement. "Get a sturdier pot and bring it to me."

During the days Lin Juangui was unconscious, Mu Zhang often went to the balcony outside his卧室 to stare at that flower. Song Jie had said it was a medium through which Lin Juangui could harmonize with his other personality.

Mu Zhang found it amusing—what connection could growing a flower possibly create? Still, he had instructed the servants to care for it, lest it wither and Lin Juangui end up fighting with himself in his mind.

Now that Lin Juangui had personally destroyed the flower, it seemed to confirm Song Jie’s diagnosis.

Mu Zhang could no longer approach Lin Juangui using his old methods because Lin Juangui would no longer show him any respect.

Before, Lin Juangui would cooperate as much as possible for Mu Zhang’s needs. But upon realizing Mu Zhang still didn’t respect him and continued to use him without hesitation, Lin Juangui ceased to care about Mu Zhang’s fate. Mu Zhang could do as he pleased—Lin Juangui’s priority was preserving himself.

Night had fallen completely, and Lin Juangui was almost awake.

He still felt weak, every movement making his muscles ache. Fighting against his own body was agony, but for Lin Juangui, it had become routine.

Lin Juangui sighed and was about to throw off the blanket to get up when he noticed Mu Zhang leaning against the balcony doorframe, quietly observing him.

So Lin Juangui lay back down, and his gaze met Mu Zhang's, neither initiating conversation.

He was just thinking that the shadows from his past remained stubbornly persistent—his vigilance had dropped so much that he was completely unaware of Mu Zhang's arrival.

To avoid making the situation more awkward, Mu Zhang's expression softened somewhat, and he looked toward the spot on the windowsill where the Moth Orchid had been. "Did you decide to get rid of that plant?"

"Yeah," Lin Juangui replied curtly, not bothering with an explanation or why he had pushed the plant off the windowsill.

Mu Zhang wouldn’t ask whether it was intentional or accidental—there had never been much to say between them anyway. Most of their interactions consisted of Mu Zhang giving orders, Lin Juangui nodding in agreement, and then both going their separate ways.

Without Lin Juangui breaking the tension, they would’ve often been left in silence like this, let alone having any meaningful conversation.

"I’m sorry about the Yao Zhi situation. I didn’t consider it thoroughly and failed to take your feelings into account."

Mu Zhang’s apology sounded sincere, but Lin Juangui had already filtered out such meaningless apologies. He got straight to the point: "What do you want me to do?"

To Lin Juangui, Mu Zhang’s apology was just a prelude to securing his cooperation for whatever came next.

Lin Juangui understood how this worked; he also had no desire to watch Mu Zhang's crocodile tears. His appetite had already been poor lately due to his low mood, and the sight of Mu Zhang made him want to skip dinner entirely.

Mu Zhang knew that his relationship with Lin Juangui was purely one of cold calculation. There was nothing unusual about Lin Juangui’s reaction.

Still, he remained silent for a long moment before saying, "Let’s talk in a few days. Focus on recovering your health first."

Lin Juangui didn’t respond. Mu Zhang turned and left, telling the servant waiting outside the bedroom to bring dinner.

But after returning to his room, Lin Juangui refused the meal, saying he had no appetite. "I’m still very tired. Let me sleep a bit more."

Over the next few days, Lin Juangui’s condition worsened. He could barely keep anything down—whatever he ate, he vomited. His weight dropped visibly, and the doctors had no choice but to put him on nutrient fluids.

His rehabilitation plan couldn’t continue due to his loss of appetite. Lin Juangui seemed to be slipping back into prolonged sleep, waking only briefly each day.

Song Jie said the situation was becoming dangerous and advised Mu Zhang not to visit Lin Juangui for the time being.

After all, Lin Juangui had been in relatively stable condition before meeting with Mu Zhang. It was unclear what Mu Zhang said to provoke such resistance in him.

Mu Zhang finally grasped the severity of Lin Juangui’s psychological issues.

In the past, he might have thought Lin Juangui was putting on an act to spite him—taking his suggestion to "focus on recovery" as a cue to do the opposite.

But now Mu Zhang understood: Lin Juangui simply detested him.

He knew this state all too well.

Years ago, Bai Qujing had been the same—her gaze distant and unfocused when speaking to him, as if her mind had drifted far away, shrouded in an aura of utter weariness with life.

"...Is there any other way?"

Fortunately, Mu Zhang had grown up. He wouldn’t stand by helplessly like he did in his youth, watching someone he cared about destroy themselves.

Song Jie was indeed hired by Mu Zhang as a pawn placed within Yungang Business College. Recently, due to the Yao Zhi incident, the counseling office had shut down, and she had been staying on Floating Island to observe Lin Juangui’s condition.

Since her employer asked, Song Jie had to come up with a solution. Sometimes, that meant calling in more help.

So one morning, when Lin Juangui woke up, he was surprised to see Huo Zeshen.

He thought he was dreaming—until Huo Zeshen noticed he was awake and cried out happily, "Brother!"

Huo Zeshen approached and asked if he was thirsty, if he wanted some water. Lin Juangui nodded numbly.

Huo Zeshen pressed the button to adjust the hospital bed. As Lin Juangui sat up, he finally collected himself, smoothed down his hair slightly, and said "thank you" when Huo Zeshen handed him water.

"Why are you here? How have you been at the training center lately?"

Lin Juangui’s voice was weak. Huo Zeshen looked visibly worried but nodded and said, "I’m doing well. I’ve been eating a lot like you said, gained some weight. But brother, you don't look well."

"..."

Lin Juangui fell silent for a moment. He lowered his head and touched his face—he didn’t need a mirror to know how awful he looked.

The weakness and darkness he never wanted Huo Zeshen to see had been exposed so abruptly, without giving him any time to prepare.

Huo Zeshen could tell Lin Juangui was in bad shape. He stood and asked the servants waiting outside to help Lin Juangui get cleaned up while he went to prepare some of Lin Juangui’s favorite foods.

"Brother, you once told me that no matter how big the problem, you still have to eat. Do you remember?"

Back then, Huo Zeshen was still an withdrawn child who often sat under a tree lost in thought. Lin Juangui had handed him a dessert and said those words.

Lin Juangui smiled faintly—he was cornered by his own advice.

"I remember. Tell them to bring the food."

"Okay."

Compared to their last meeting, Huo Zeshen had indeed grown stronger and taller.

He fed Lin Juangui with a spoon, not asking what he’d been through lately, but instead sharing stories from his time at the training center.

It was mostly mundane stuff. Huo Zeshen had never received a formal education before, so he had to start from scratch in everything. Fortunately, he learned quickly. Though he lagged far behind others, catching up wasn’t impossible.

Lin Juangui felt relieved, a faint smile in his eyes as he watched Huo Zeshen.

Huo Zeshen left in the afternoon—he couldn’t stay away from the training center for too long. This exception was made possible by someone calling in some favors.

Lin Juangui’s Alpha, Huo Zeshen, had come and gone, but Mu Zhang had no particular impression of him. Whether arriving or leaving, Huo Zeshen only offered a polite greeting, showing no interest in further conversation.

Song Jie had initially hoped Huo Zeshen’s visit would help Lin Juangui’s condition, but when the sound of vomiting echoed from the room again, her expression turned grave.

Lin Juangui had been holding himself together just to reassure Huo Zeshen.

After vomiting, he covered his mouth with a towel, gripped the blanket tightly, and stared toward the door, hatred welling in his eyes.

Was bringing Huo Zeshen here suddenly meant to threaten him?

Everyone knew Lin Juangui and Huo Zeshen’s relationship was merely that of sponsor and sponsored. What was Mu Zhang’s motive in letting Huo Zeshen see him in such a wretched state?

Lin Juangui’s voice was already hoarse, but he still shouted toward the slightly open bedroom door: "Mu Zhang! I believe since marrying you, I’ve never done anything against your interests! I don’t know why you dislike me so much, and I don’t care about your prejudices! I’ve lived with a clear conscience, but you keep finding ways to disgust me! By what right?!"

The servants nearby stared at Lin Juangui in shock. After exchanging glances, they quickly collected the vomit basin and left—but didn’t close the door.

The hallway outside was dark and silent. Lin Juangui’s words hit Mu Zhang like hammer blows.

"From the very beginning, you chose me to be your Omega, used P-L79 to pressure the Lin family, forced me into marriage, and expected me to pretend it was what I wanted.

Later, you couldn’t bear to part with P-L79, pretended to worry I’d be deceived, followed me, accused me of lying, and even gambled with my life to test its authenticity!

I regret not leaving you in Bada—at least then I wouldn’t have to endure all the humiliation you bring me now!

Tell me—which of these wasn't a calculated move? I treated you sincerely—what did you ever give me back?

I can’t imagine someone like you ever loving anyone. Whoever is loved by you is damned!"