Chapter 206: You Should Have Died With Me

Chapter 206: You Should Have Died With Me

Lu Yan’s features have never changed.

Just as they were back then, they remain the same now. However, when he was pushed onto the soft bed by Huo Lang, Huo Lang suddenly found it hard to see his face clearly. Only those eyes, filled with fragmented light, seemed familiar, as if he had seen them in a past life.

"Little Emperor..."

Huo Lang murmured, reaching out to touch his face.

"My name is Lu Yan, courtesy name Qingzhuo."

Lu Yan closed his eyes, pressing against Huo Lang's palm, and whispered the name that had been kept secret for years:

"Human craftsmanship surpasses the divine; refining medicine and lighting lamps are akin to the clarity of day... My mother named me this because she loved watching fireworks."

"This name I tell only to you."

Qingzhuo, Qingzhuo.

Huo Lang repeated these words silently in his heart, memorizing them deeply. He traced Lu Yan’s clean, ink-like brows with his calloused fingertips, his gaze deep and hoarse: "Only a speck of cinnabar red remains after grinding it all away. Your mother did give birth to you well, giving you an extra mole compared to others..."

He had never truly knelt before anyone, nor was he willing to be anyone’s subject.

Only Lu Yan, only Lu Yan...

He was his emperor alone.

Even if no one else in the world recognized him, he did.

Lu Yan smiled at Huo Lang upon hearing this. He quietly undid the canopy above them, then removed Huo Lang’s cold armor and sharp sword from his waist. Only when Huo Lang lay there like fish on a cutting board did Lu Yan slowly take off his own long robe adorned with bamboo.

"Swish—"

The clothes fell to the ground, the soft silk mingling with the cold armor, creating a stark yet oddly harmonious contrast.

In the dim light, Huo Lang slowly caressed the cinnabar mole on Lu Yan’s waist, feeling as if it were a drop of blood on snow, vivid and striking: "Grinding away all but a speck of cinnabar red, your mother did give birth to you well, giving you an extra mole..."

Lu Yan held his wandering hand, wearing a gentle expression, and whispered lewd words that made one blush: "I shouldn’t have engaged in such debauchery with you that day, allowing you to see me and revealing my weakness."

This fool, if he hadn't touched him in this life, who knows when he would have recognized him.

Huo Lang seemed to guess what Lu Yan was thinking. With a forceful pull, he drew Lu Yan closer, their bodies pressed tightly together. He slightly curved his lips, whispering into Lu Yan’s ear: "I’m not blind. The differences between you and that sickly person aren’t just limited to this spot..."

These words, if pondered too deeply, evoked a boundless, heart-pounding sentiment, endless and enthralling.

Lu Yan lowered his body, directly kissing Huo Lang’s cold lips, swallowing all the muffled groans. The shadows of the canopy above swayed, blurred and indistinct, like a surreal dream.

Huo Lang suddenly felt pain, unsure whether it was due to Lu Yan’s touch or something else. His head hurt, his body hurt, and his heart hurt even more.

The soft bedding turned into cold ice.

The rain of kisses on his body became a dagger piercing his heart.

Everything before his eyes turned blood-red, yet carried the chill of sleet.

Huo Lang couldn’t control his trembling, his fingers digging deeply into Lu Yan’s shoulders. The corners of his eyes were flushed with desire, his eyelashes wet with tears, his brows furrowed in pain, and his forehead covered in a fine layer of sweat.

"Lu Yan..."

His mind clouded, he murmured Lu Yan’s name:

"Lu Yan..."

Scattered images flashed through his mind. He led troops into the palace, seizing control of the entire imperial city. Lu Yan, sitting on the dragon throne, looked at him in horror, shrinking back.

He raised his sword to kill him but hesitated.

The sharp tip of the blade lifted high, heavy as a mountain. That moment of hesitation exposed a flaw, and the previously terrified Lu Yan suddenly pulled out a dagger from his sleeve and stabbed it fiercely into Huo Lang’s chest, gritting his teeth: "Huo Lang! Go to hell!"

That familiar face, filled with hatred and disgust when looking at him.

Huo Lang was momentarily stunned. Blood splattered across his pale cheeks, vivid and striking, contrasting with his dark, deep eyes, making them unnervingly chilling.

"You killed me...?"

Huo Lang heard his dream self speak in disbelief.

Each word pierced his heart like a knife.

He stumbled back two steps, blocking the surging tide of his subordinates, then slowly raised his sword and swung it without warning towards the terrified emperor. A loud clang echoed as the dragon throne was cut in half, leaving the other unscathed.

Was it because Huo Lang had lost strength? Or had he missed his aim?

The dream gradually faded, as if someone had tossed a stone into a pond, breaking all the images into ripples. Only the last words lingered, filled with endless hatred:

"You don’t deserve to die with me..."

It turns out he still couldn’t bear it.

So cold, so much colder than when the late emperor had punished him by making him kneel on the Nine Dragons Steps.

Is this how it feels to die?

Huo Lang could no longer distinguish who he was. He seemed to become the "Huo Lang" in the dream who knew nothing about the impersonation, his heart aching intensely, unable to stop trembling.

That person wasn’t the emperor, surely not. He wouldn’t treat him like that!

But the other was indeed the emperor, plotting for years to weaken his power in the court, perhaps to kill him!

Huo Lang couldn’t understand. His head was throbbing so badly it felt like it would split open, and scalding tears rolled down the corners of his eyes, choking sobs escaping from his throat.

At that time, he was in a lowly position, while that person was the Crown Prince, yet he had always been kind and considerate. How could he have done such a heartless and unfaithful act?!

Huo Lang didn’t know what was going on with the emperor before him. He only knew that the person he loved wasn’t this one, or perhaps all these years, it had just been his own wishful thinking...

Huo Lang felt as if he were lost in a deep crimson sea, unable to find an end. Like a blind man, he frantically searched for the long sword, trembling and laughing softly, his eyes filled with a murderous rage. Suddenly, a terrifying thought emerged—

He wanted to kill the emperor.

The other party should die with him, inseparable.

If he died, how could the other live?

Huo Lang didn’t care whether the person was Lu Yan or not.

The road to the netherworld is long, and souls do not come in pairs.

But for your sake, I will drive away the demons with my sword.

While the other party couldn’t even stabilize the empire when alive, they certainly couldn’t after death. How could Huo Lang leave the emperor alone in the mortal world? It was better to drag him into hell and help him expel the demons at the Yama’s palace.

Huo Lang trembled violently, his breath quickening. He woke up from his dream, fumbling in the dark, and accidentally touched Lu Yan’s neck. Suddenly, he became calm.

Huo Lang stared at the person above him, momentarily stunned. The emperor?

He couldn’t distinguish between dreams and reality anymore. His slender fingers slowly tightened around Lu Yan’s neck, like a snake coiling tighter, silently moving his lips: "I love you..."

I love you.

Do you know?

The suffocating sensation of near-death washed over them, giving them a strange sense of shared joy.

Lu Yan couldn’t see Huo Lang’s bloodshot eyes, nor his ghostly pale face, nor the crazed look in his eyes. A faint black line suddenly appeared on his right arm, resembling a raised vein, winding all the way to his chest—

The poison had taken effect!

It felt as if an invisible blade was slicing through his organs, the pain most intense in his chest. He bit his tongue until it bled but ignored it, cupping Huo Lang’s face and kissing him deeply, asking softly, "Why are you shaking all over?"

Huo Lang hadn’t expected the emperor to kiss him. He froze for a moment, then moved his pale, chapped lips, hoarsely uttering a single word: "Cold..."

He died on the coldest winter day in Beishu, snow covering the imperial city.

Lu Yan hugged him tightly, as if trying to merge their bodies.

Huo Lang said again, "Pain..."

Lu Yan: "Where does it hurt?"

Huo Lang remained silent, slowly releasing Lu Yan, pointing to his heart with dark eyes: "Here..."

Lu Yan smiled, his forehead covered in cold sweat, yet his smile was gentle: "I’m in pain too. I’ll suffer with you, okay?"

His actions were fierce and brutal, as if trying to make Huo Lang die in bed, yet the bloody kisses carried a barely perceptible gentleness. Huo Lang’s hands, which could easily break Lu Yan’s neck, repeatedly slipped away in despair.

Huo Lang’s mind was a jumbled mess.

Where was he? In the Yama’s palace or the Divine Health Hall?

Hadn’t he died? How could he still be alive?

The emperor was even lying with him, doing such intimate things.

Another set of unfamiliar memories flooded his mind, leading to a different path than his previous life, where he met a tragic end. Even the emperor’s identity had an answer now.

The other party was indeed fake...

Huo Lang suddenly closed his eyes tightly, burying his head and biting into Lu Yan’s shoulder, like a lone wolf, like a venomous snake, like all the fiercest creatures in the world, but not human, determined to kill his prey.

And Lu Yan didn’t dodge or retreat; instead, he buried his face in the other’s neck, panting softly, pulling him closer, and after a while, whispered, "Huo Lang..."

He said, "Be the emperor."

The Zhao family was almost extinct. In his previous life, he had blocked the other’s path, so in this life, let Huo Lang stand in that lofty position, no longer needing to bow to anyone.

Huo Lang didn’t speak, taking a long time to release his teeth. He kissed the blood flowing from the wound, trailing to Lu Yan’s lips, sharing the metallic taste, his voice hoarse: "Lu Yan?"

"Hmm?"

"Lu Yan?"

"Hmm."

Huo Lang’s eyes were pitch-black, the blood on his lips adding an inexplicable allure: "I love you. Do you love me?"

Lu Yan lowered his head to kiss him, slowly uttering a single word: "Yes."

He had wronged him but also loved him.

How could a faithless person fall in love?

Only by risking life and death.

Huo Lang used his life in his previous incarnation to move this man, colder than any emperor, leaving himself scarred and unsure if it was worth it. But as long as he was content, it was enough.

Huo Lang was too cold, so Lu Yan, still uneasy, ordered the palace attendants to prepare a medicinal soup. He put on his outer robe, sat by the bed, smelled it, took a sip, and confirmed there was nothing wrong before helping him sit up: "Drink this and get some rest."

Huo Lang stared at him without moving: "I don’t want to sleep."

Lu Yan asked softly, "Do you not want to sleep, or do you not want to take the medicine?"

Huolang remained silent.

Lu Yan held him in his arms and sighed helplessly, "Be good, I'll feed you."

He fed him spoon by spoon, and Huolang indeed drank it all, quietly and silently. After a long while, he murmured, "... You've never treated me this well before."

He was referring to their past life.

But Lu Yan thought he meant this life, setting the bowl aside, "I think you're just dazed from sleep."

He might have wanted to say that Huolang had been acting like a fool on the bed, looking as if he had lost his soul, and then he pulled back the covers to lie down again.

"Are you still cold?"

"Cold..."

"If I hold you, you won't be cold."

"Lu Yan, hold me tighter..."

"Any tighter and I'll strangle you."

Lu Yan closed his eyes, resting his forehead against Huolang's, and gently patted his back, his voice soft and lazy, "Sleep now, I'm here."

He didn't know how well Huolang slept, but he knew that his own sleep was unusually long. When he woke up again, the entire Beishu had changed.