Chapter 116: Oh, You Can’t Do It, Useless!

Chapter 116 Oh, You Can’t Do It, Worthless Trash!

She reported it?

Liu Caiyi paused, stunned. Upon realizing it was Cai Zhixuan who made the wish, she suddenly understood: "Totally sounds like her."

Just as she’d guessed—the person who made the wish was indeed someone she knew.

Cai Zhixuan had been her classmate in both middle school and high school. However, they’d only been in the same class freshman year, so their relationship wasn’t particularly close.

Perhaps precisely because they’d been classmates once and remained in the same school afterward, Cai Zhixuan’s parents kept holding Liu Caiyi up as an example to motivate their daughter.

Of course, this so-called motivation was merely what her parents believed. In reality, every child subjected to such comparisons knew it was ineffective. If it didn’t blow up in their faces, they were lucky.

Though Liu Caiyi and Cai Zhixuan never became close friends, they still weren’t strangers—not intimate either. They would greet each other when they met, and sometimes toss her a snack if they happened to cross paths, but that was the extent of it.

Over the years, Liu Caiyi had come to understand Cai Zhixuan to some degree.

Cai Zhixuan wasn’t great at school, especially with certain subjects, which kept her overall grades from improving.

But poor academic performance didn’t mean she was malicious or unintelligent. Cai Zhixuan simply wasn’t skilled in that area.

From what Liu Caiyi knew, Cai Zhixuan was actually quite sharp as a tack, capable of leaving opponents speechless in debates. She had even represented their school in provincial and municipal debate competitions and won awards.

She was also cheerful and lively.

Thinking about it carefully, the first thing anyone would do in such a situation was call the cops.

If evil spirits and deities like this existed, it wasn’t far-fetched to assume there might be an official organization managing such phenomena. And the police station was the most accessible way for ordinary people to reach out to occult specialists.

To keep from getting laughed out of the room, Cai Zhixuan hadn’t even gone to a local precinct—she’d headed straight to HQ.

Moreover, even if there were no official organizations dealing with such matters, when faced with this kind of situation, ordinary people seeking to protect themselves, their families, or even the planet would naturally turn to the authorities for help rather than trying to handle it alone.

"Cai Zhixuan extracted a lot of crucial information."

"She wasn’t unafraid of the evil deity, but her reflexive actions in response weren’t just about sucking up to it."

"While engaging with the evil deity, she played dumb about making a statue to learn about its true form."

"She also took advantage of the ritual of offering incense, explaining that invoking the deity’s name was necessary to ensure the offerings reached it properly. After all, when people pray to Guanyin, they always begin by saying, ‘Guanyin, bless me,’ before making their requests."

"Those who visit Tianhou Palace say, ‘Mazu, bless me’; those who pray at Wenchang Temple say, ‘Wenchang Dijun, bless me’—it’s the same for all deities. So when worshipping this one, it’s best to do the same to avoid having one’s faith go to waste or, worse, benefit another deity."

"What a waste!"

"Even if it doesn’t go astray, it’d be bad if another deity received it. That’d be helping the competition!"

"The evil deity dropped the fact that there were no other gods on the planet—local deities seemed nonexistent, and among foreign deities, it was currently the only one. Eventually, the planet was gonna be its turf, and even if other deities discovered it, it wouldn’t matter. It wouldn’t let anyone steal what was its. Upon hearing this, Cai Zhixuan was bummed but also weirdly reassured."

"Bummed that the planet had no native deities to rely on in times of crisis. She had already suspected as much when her wish—made in what should have been a temple of her own gods—was warped into something awful."

"Otherwise, no way it’d have the guts."

"It was banking on two things."

"Either there were no other gods on the planet besides it, or the planet’s native deities were weaker, allowing it to run wild like this."

"At least there was this—the planet didn’t seem to be targeted by any other evil deities. Only this one bastard to deal with."

"Even one is terrifying enough, but better than dealing with multiple."

"No matter what she was thinking inside, Cai Zhixuan didn't show it. Instead, she kept pushing her case."

"Although she's still a poor student and can't afford to build a golden statue or a temple for Him, she's gonna grow up. In a few years, she'll graduate from university, start working, and earn money. She'll totally build Him a temple then."

"Everything other gods have, He must have too!"

"We should totally pick a temple name now!"

"Cai Zhixuan tried to sell the evil god a big dream."

Sheng Qingquan had seen teachers painting rosy pictures for students and bosses doing the same for workers. But this was the first time he'd seen someone doing it for an evil god.

"Weirdly enough, the evil god actually believed her."

"After all, in the evil god’s eyes, this kid was the real deal. Without even being asked, she took out her phone to carve a statue for Him, even throwing in a full set of shrine accessories."

"Even though she doesn’t have much money now, she's going all out. She even mentioned that after her college entrance exams, her folks were gonna give her a travel fund. Though she can’t afford anything too expensive now, she could buy two gemstones to embed in His eyes, making do with pearls for the rest, and replace them gradually in the future."

"Someone who's willing to go all out for Him now—no way she'd back out once she starts earning money?"

"Watching Cai Zhixuan’s account balance hit zero, the evil god was all in on her."

"He had heard a saying on Tianlanxing: 'Where the money is, there the love is.' The evil god wholeheartedly agreed."

"Cai Zhixuan’s words were smooth and convincing."

"Many temples are named directly after the deity’s name or title, which helps spread faith. The evil god checked and found this to be true—Tianlanxing was filled with temples like the Mazu Temple, Guan Di Temple, and Bodhisattva Temples..."

"It made the evil god green with envy, wishing he could claim all that faith for himself. And now, this was his foot in the door."

"That’s why the kid was slick—using the evil god’s greed, she learned that he was a being with thirteen pairs of eyes, two wings, and seven tails. But his tails weren’t fluffy like a fox’s; they were serpentine, like something out of a nuclear meltdown."

"His entire body was an eerie shade of purple, covered in gray spots. Ugly, like a purple rag soaked in water, used to wipe a dusty table, left to rot in the humidity, and now moldy."

"Unforgettable. With this description, anyone who saw him in real life would recognize him instantly."

"Of course, at the time, Cai Zhixuan kept laying it on thick, saying things like, 'Truly befitting of You—the color scheme of Your true form is so sophisticated. It’s the highly sought-after Morandi palette! And since ancient times, purple has been the color of nobility.'"

["'I never understood why ancient emperors and nobles considered purple a noble color—until I saw You. Now I get it. There really is a color this majestic.'"]

["'Only a color like this is worthy of You!'"]

["'Purple clouds from the east are an auspicious sign. I just randomly visited a temple and met You—You are my purple clouds from the east!'"]

"She flattered the evil god into a daze."

"Her words were so over-the-top that to modern ears, they'd make you gag. But to the evil god, who’d never heard such things before, they pushed all the right buttons."

Even though the evil god didn’t say it outright, Sheng Qingquan could read between the lines—the evil god’s thoughts were clear:

*Good shit. More of that. Keep it coming.*

"Especially since, if these words had come from a top student, the evil god might have doubted them. But knowing he had blown up two schools for her and fully aware of how terrible her grades were, he was convinced she was a total dumbass."

"What kinda moron could lie convincingly? No way this was an act!"

"The evil deity calmly revealed its true name to Cai Zhixuan, watching as she reminded the online artisan to engrave four gilded characters—'Xian Zha Xi Gua'—on the custom shrine. So pleased that its wing feathers ruffled contentedly from the flattery, the deity couldn't resist showing off its power."

["'Isn't it just about making money? Just help me gather more followers, especially wealthy ones, and you'll have everything.'"]

["'You don’t even have to wait until you start working. As my first follower here, you deserve some privileges. I'll allow you to skim wealth from others to improve your life.'"]

["'Once you pick a target, tell them they’ll face disaster unless they worship Xian Zha Xi Gua. If they refuse, calamities will strike. One narrow escape should convert them. If not, repeat until they believe—or die, serving as an example to others.'"]

["'You know so-and-so? He didn’t believe in Xian Zha Xi Gua. Even though I helped him several times, I don't keep constant watch over non-believers. Once I looked away, he met his end.'"]

["'That’ll make an impact. Who wouldn’t convert after hearing that?!'"]

["'Can’t you just transfer their money to my account? No, too obvious. Better drain their luck and give it to me. I’ll buy a lottery ticket and win big. Legitimate funds, quickly obtained—maybe even enough to build your temple before school starts.'"]

"Failing to recognize Cai Zhixuan was testing it, Xian Zha Xi Gua admitted its powers leaned more toward martial prowess."

["'Why bother with coercion? Temptation works better. Targeting individuals is inefficient anyway.'"]

["'Since ancient times, profit moves hearts,' Cai Zhixuan flattered. 'You’re omnipotent—why not offer some rudimentary cultivation methods? Nothing fancy, just enough to show results. No need to tailor them for humans.'"]

["'Then announce only your followers can access these methods to rise above the mundane.'"]

["'This way you won't need to lift a finger,' Cai Zhixuan suggested. 'People will flock to worship you, each more devout than the last.'"]

["'Tianlanxing has countless people, but a being like you deserves even more followers.'"]

["'Honestly, even if the entire planet worshipped you, it still would be beneath you.'"]

["'Reluctantly, I think you could extend your grace to plants and animals. In Tianlanxing’s lore, even rocks and clouds can develop spiritual awareness. Awaken them, and your follower count would explode.'"]

["Just think about how few humans there are on Tianlanxing compared to the number of plants and animals."]

["Not to mention, take the deserts on Tianlanxing—imagine how many grains of sand there are. If every grain could gain sentience, the faith from just one desert’s sand alone would drown Tianlanxing."]

["I might not know much, but I imagine for a deity, the more faith, the better, right?!""]

Faced with Cai Zhixuan’s suggestion, Xianzhaxigua responded that granting cultivation techniques to humans would be too generous, making it harder to harvest faith later. It would be like a one-off bargain—once humans gained power, why would they keep worshipping him?

As for granting sentience to other beings, it wasn’t worth the cost. *Your intentions are good, but you’re still a student—too naive. And your vision is too narrow, your considerations incomplete. This planet simply doesn’t allow such actions. Forcing it would come at too great a price.*

*The cost outweighs the gain. Not worth it.*

He preferred slow, steady sustainability.

*"Oh, so you can’t do it. Pathetic!"* Cai Zhixuan understood.

*"Pfft!"* Sheng Qingquan was amused by Cai Zhixuan’s inner thoughts. Because she was so effective, he didn’t even need to exert much effort—he’d already obtained plenty of valuable intel. His earlier anger and gloom faded.

*"But gloriously useless!"*

Cai Zhixuan wasn’t alone—others felt the same way.