Chapter 28 “Shen”

Chapter 28 "Shen"

The lantern that Shen Shiyan had called ugly was also placed in a compartment in the study.

The housekeeper had left dinner, but Shen Shiyan had no appetite. He took a few bites and put down his chopsticks, returning to his bedroom.

Shen Ci obediently finished the rice in his bowl, not sneaking extra helpings as he usually did.

He looked worriedly at the half-open door to Shen Shiyan's room, then went back to his own room to fetch the medicine kit.

"Daddy," Shen Ci entered the room and placed the kit on the nightstand, "do you need to take medicine?"

Shen Shiyan's fever wasn't actually very high. He knew his own body too well; he just urgently needed proper rest and a good night's sleep.

With half his face buried in the pillow, he cracked open an eye to glance at Shen Ci standing by the bed.

The room's main light was off. Shen Ci stood a little shorter than the large floor lamp by the bedside. His hair had grown longer, now looking a bit like an animal going through an awkward phase—cute but also a little funny. At this moment, his eyes were brimming with concern.

Shen Shiyan thought of how Shen Ci had slept soundly in his arms last Friday.

He made a 'tsk' sound.

Shen Shiyan didn't know why, but an impulse mixed with inexplicable irritation washed over him. He propped himself up slightly, reached out and switched off the lamp.

The curtains weren't drawn. The faint winter moonlight streamed into the room, yet it seemed to leave him feeling more exposed than the warm yellow glow of the bedside lamp had.

"Shen Ci."

Shen Shiyan buried his entire face in the pillow, as if trying to suffocate himself.

Shen Ci answered softly from beside the bed, "Daddy."

The soft pillow did nothing to calm the restless feeling in his heart; instead, it seemed to use up what little air was left in his chest. Soon, he felt even hotter.

Shen Shiyan lifted his head. His hand shot out from under the blanket, swiftly and accurately grabbing Shen Ci's wrist, pulling him into bed and holding him close.

Startled by the sudden move, Shen Ci froze, his back pressed tightly against Shen Shiyan's burning chest. After a second or two, Shen Ci belatedly realized Shen Shiyan had a fever.

"Daddy." Shen Ci wanted to sit up and get medicine for him but was held even tighter.

Shen Shiyan settled his chin on top of Shen Ci's head. The scent of shower gel lingered in his nose. It soothed his impulse and irritation. For the first time in eighteen years, he felt a sense of peace from someone other than his mother.

"Let me hold you for a while." Shen Shiyan's voice was as cool and detached as ever.

Shen Ci went still, quietly letting Shen Shiyan hold him.

He thought back over the past six months of living with Daddy.

The first contact he remembered was Shen Shiyan's back, then his little finger, his palm, a waist his two arms could just fit around, a warm embrace and shoulders.

Shen Ci couldn't remember clearly, but he knew he liked Shen Shiyan's hugs the best.

If he could be hugged like this forever, then he felt the hardships he'd endured before didn't matter much.

Shen Ci kept letting his thoughts wander and soon grew sleepy.

"Shen Ci, do you want the surname Shen?"

Just as he was about to fall asleep, Shen Ci heard Shen Shiyan's voice and woke up a little.

He answered quickly, "Yeah."

Shen Shiyan asked again, "Why?"

Shen Ci said, "Because Daddy's surname is Shen."

"What if I don't want the surname Shen anymore?"

Shen Ci thought for a moment. "Then I don't want it either."

For the first time, he realized Shen Shiyan could have so many questions too.

Soon, the voice above his head spoke again. "Then I won't be surnamed Shen in the future."

Shen Ci was fully awake now. Although he didn't understand what Shen Shiyan really meant, he replied firmly, "Whatever surname Daddy has, I'll have the same."

Shen Shiyan nuzzled his chin against Shen Ci's hair. "Without the surname Shen, there'd be no money to spend, and I couldn't be President Shen. I'd have to go begging."

Shen Ci's eyes widened. He thought it over for a moment before finally making up his mind, he said, gritting his teeth, "Then I'll go begging with Daddy."

Shen Shiyan let out a low chuckle.

As if afraid Shen Shiyan would leave him behind, Shen Ci eagerly tried to prove he could be useful. "I used to beg when I was little. I have more experience than Daddy. I know the best places to beg, and I also know—"

"Stop talking," Shen Shiyan reached out a hand to cover Shen Ci's mouth, then quickly released it. "I won't let you beg."

"What about Daddy?" Shen Ci was still worried.

"I won't either."

Shen Shiyan didn't really know what he was saying either. His head was dizzy and muddled, just like it had been that afternoon at the company.

But at least he didn't need pain to keep his thoughts clear, the way he had that afternoon, Shen Shiyan thought.

Shen Ci was quiet for a long moment before asking in return, "Does having the surname Shen make Daddy unhappy?"

Shen Shiyan's breath was hot as he mumbled in reply, "A little."

Shen Ci tried to look up at him, but the tight embrace held him fast.

"Even though I don't like Grandpa Shen, Uncle Shen, or their children who are also named Shen, I like Daddy Shen," Shen Ci settled for the next best thing, poking Shen Shiyan's arm with his fingernail as he continued earnestly. "It's not because Daddy is surnamed Shen. It's just because Daddy is Daddy. You're different from all of them."

Shen Ci himself was almost dizzy from this whole "Shen surname" discussion.

The room was quiet for a long time. Shen Ci didn't speak again either, because it seemed Shen Shiyan had fallen asleep.

The lights in the living room were still on. The housekeeper had finished cleaning and returned to the dedicated staff quarters within the Shen residence.

In the side courtyard, only Shen Shiyan and Shen Ci remained.

"Thank you, Shen Ci."

In the quiet of Shen Ci's steady breathing, Shen Shiyan said softly.

Whether it was the power-hungry and cold-hearted Shen Wenzhou, the unscrupulous and ruthless Shen Siwen, or the scheming Shen Siyu and his inherently wicked son Shen Rong.

None of them were him. No one could represent him.

Having gone to sleep early, Shen Ci woke up early the next day, the cloud-shaped ceiling light coming into focus above him.

After a moment, Shen Ci sprang up from the bed, dashed out of his room, and met the gaze of Shen Shiyan, who was nibbling on a slice of toast by the kitchen island.

"Put on your shoes," Shen Shiyan said, swallowing the bite he had just taken, his face expressionless.

Shen Ci went back and soon returned, shuffling in his slippers. He glanced at Shen Shiyan, then at the door to Shen Shiyan's room.

Why was his memory always so jumbled?

He was baffled. He distinctly remembered falling asleep in Shen Shiyan's arms the night before, with Shen Shiyan saying a bunch of strange, rambling things and questions.

How had he woken up back in his own room?

Shen Shiyan had already finished his slice of bread, while Shen Ci was still lost in thought.

"Go wash up and eat," Shen Shiyan urged, acting completely clueless.

"Oh."

Shen Ci mechanically squeezed toothpaste onto his brush, numbly filled a cup with water, and numbly shoved the toothbrush into his mouth.

After brushing his teeth, he washed his face in the same daze. As the warm water touched his cheeks, a fragment of yesterday's conversation flashed through his mind. Without bothering to dry his face first, he rushed out of the bathroom, his face still wet, and ran up to Shen Shiyan.

Shen Shiyan was heating milk for him and was just starting to frown when Shen Ci asked,

"Daddy! Are we going to beg?"

A strange silence fell over the room. A few water droplets dripped from Shen Ci's chin onto the floor.

Shen Shiyan turned his back, fiddling with the microwave that hadn't finished yet, fighting back a smile.

"Daddy!" Shen Ci tugged at his shirt.

With a *ding*, the microwave door opened, releasing the scent of warm milk. Shen Shiyan put on gloves, took out the milk, and placed it on the island.

The water on Shen Ci's face had almost dried. Shen Shiyan reached out to smooth down a few strands of Shen Ci's sticking-up hair and said, "No, we won't."