Chapter 035: I Hate You, Stay Away from Me

Chapter 035: I Hate You, Stay Away from Me

This week's dinners were prepared by two old educated youths in the evenings, with two people taking turns each week. The new educated youths had just arrived, and the team leader hadn't assigned them yet, placing them further down the schedule.

Of course, there was concern that during the busy farming season, the newcomers were still inexperienced. If they did a poor job, everyone would already be starving and exhausted upon returning to the educated youth compound, only to find no food ready and more work to do, wasting time.

When Chen Qingjuan returned to the compound, he tucked the letter away. He didn't feel tired; in fact, he seemed quite busy. He fetched water twice to bathe, washed his hair thoroughly, and changed into clean clothes. He looked exceptionally refined, standing out starkly from the others who sat around in disheveled exhaustion.

After the evening wind dried his hair, he even combed and styled it, suddenly becoming very conscious of his appearance.

Everyone saw him fussing so much and couldn't bear to watch, thinking, "Isn't he tired? Today's sweat was overwhelming. Now we all smell the same, and there's an odor lingering in the courtyard, only slightly carried away by the wind. The rest of us just want to sit and rest without moving, but not Chen Qingjuan—he still has energy for this."

However, since he hadn't used the communal water, but had fetched his own by effort, they only muttered privately about his peculiar habits without openly criticizing.

At mealtime, there was only one table. Many people filled their bowls and scattered to find cool spots to eat. Crowding together meant breathing in the stench of sweat, killing their appetite.

Besides, everyone was so exhausted that no amount of water quenched their thirst, and no one had the energy to talk. The courtyard fell silent, with only the rustling of leaves in the wind and the clinking of chopsticks against bowls—a scene of ravenous devouring.

After his bath, Chen Qingjuan was particularly mindful of his own scent. He had brought soap from home, and after washing, he carried a faint, fresh fragrance like bamboo in the early morning. His clothes, though similar to others, were visibly of better quality and fabric, making him look refined and aristocratic. In short, he was exceptionally fastidious.

He was even worried that he might not smell pleasant enough and stood far from everyone. He didn't say it outright, but his actions clearly showed disdain. Though everyone shared the same feeling, when he displayed it, it came across differently. Someone sniffed their own clothes and felt like vomiting.

"Comrade Deng."

Deng Yangchun was surprised to be sought out, given how foul she smelled right then. Even so, Chen Qingjuan spoke to her from three steps away.

He got straight to the point. "About your earlier proposal to rent a house in the village—count me in."

He really disliked sleeping crammed in a room with so many people. Not only was space limited with no privacy, but the night was full of grinding teeth, farting, snoring, and sleep-talking. He was tortured by it all.

Chen Qingjuan was a light sleeper, not so light that a small noise would keep him awake, but this was far from a small noise. After a hard day's work, people snored heavily, one after another, like a chorus of bullfrogs.

"Great, I was just about to ask how you felt about it. With you joining, we should have enough. I'll go tell Pushu tomorrow," Deng Yangchun said happily, finally looking forward to moving out so she could eat better and regain her strength.

The day's labor had left her palms blistered. Some blisters had burst from repeated friction, and when she washed her hands after work, the sting made her wince.

"No need for tomorrow. Let's go now." Chen Qingjuan added with sound reasoning, "Each of us is renting separately, so we should each talk to the village head. If you go alone and someone backs out later, it'll be messy."

Deng Yangchun realized he was right. She couldn't afford to shoulder that problem. "Alright, let's go to the village head's place now, then."

"Okay."

Besides the two of them, another female educated youth also decided to rent. She had some savings.

This girl had arrived last year and was considered an old educated youth. She kept a low profile in both dress and diet, but she had accumulated a decent sum of money.

Originally, she had found a job and didn't need to go to the countryside, but her brother was getting married, and his new wife demanded the job. Her family pressured her to give it up. Her parents favored her brother, so under pressure, she relinquished it, considering it repayment for their upbringing. She decided her family wouldn't concern her anymore. Once she moved to the countryside, she transferred her household registration out.

But she wasn't naive. She made them send her a monthly allowance; otherwise, she would write letters to report them and cause trouble at the factory, potentially costing everyone their jobs.

Over the year, she saved quite a bit. However, as a woman alone, she had to keep her wealth hidden. Once, when she went to the county to pick up a package, a male educated youth saw her and began pestering her, pretending to court her in hopes of getting her money. She was tired of it.

She had wanted to rent a house in the village earlier, but living alone as a woman was even more dangerous, so she endured until now.

When Deng Yangchun asked her, she agreed without hesitation. As long as she wasn't the only one and had companions, she would definitely move out. She had had enough.

The other two were married couples. They had gotten married earlier this year, but the educated youth compound was so small that even married couples couldn't get separate rooms.

They were allocated a partitioned small woodshed, already tiny, and split into two. The two couples lived next to each other, separated by a thin wall. At night, they couldn't even speak freely.

They had considered building houses in the village, but the future ownership of those houses was uncertain since the land belonged to the village. Considering everything, they had to endure.

But now, it had become unbearable. At night, they dared not make a sound; if they opened the door the next day and saw each other, everyone would be too embarrassed. They couldn't bear that shame.

When Deng Yangchun asked them, they didn't hesitate long before deciding to move out. Ten yuan a year was manageable. They had some savings, and if that wasn't enough, they could write home for help with the rent. Once they made up their minds, they couldn't wait to move out immediately. Being married but having no married life at all—what kind of marriage was that? It was too difficult.

·

The Guo family had just finished dinner. The afterglow of sunset was slowly swallowed by the night, leaving a bit of light. The evening breeze was cool, and insects chirped incessantly from the trees in the nearby woods.

Guo Pushu, who had been absent all afternoon, was now at home.

As soon as Chen Qingjuan entered the yard, he spotted her. He didn't know why, but in that large courtyard, his eyes quickly locked onto her. He unconsciously straightened his back and touched his hair, presenting his best side.

He told himself not to look, but his peripheral vision kept stealing glances at her. When Guo Pushu caught him, he guiltily looked away.

Just thinking about the "sneaking into the woods" thing made the air feel stuffier. How could Guo Pushu be so calm? She had sent him a signal to meet in the woods, yet seeing him here, she showed no panic or shyness.

No one noticed their silent "exchange" of glances. Guo Pushu looked at him openly. She noticed that Chen Qingjuan seemed even more handsome tonight. From a distance, she even had the illusion that he smelled nice, a scent that would whet her appetite. Did loving someone make them seem like delicious food?

Facing the group's request, Father Guo didn't refuse or agree. He just reminded them, "The price is clear. Since you've come and accepted it, I won't say more. But once you move in, you can't damage the house or furniture, nor alter the structure. Of course, if couples have children and want to partition a room or two, that's allowed, but you must inform the village first. Any objections? If not, I'll show you the house. After seeing it, if you're sure and want to rent, just pay the fee."

These conditions weren't unreasonable, so no one objected. After all, they were renting, not owning. Any changes would require permission—basic courtesy.

"Dad, you rest. You've had a long day. I'll take them," Guo Pushu offered, as if trying to spare her father the trouble. But her true intention was obvious.

Father Guo subconsciously glanced at Chen Qingjuan. The latter felt a chill, as if he were a thief sneaking into the Guo house, spotting a prized flower, and trying to take the pot and all, only to be caught by the owner just as he was about to leave—stuck in an awkward situation.

"Alright, alright, my daughter is so filial. Your old dad is getting on in years; I just mentioned my back hurts. You go ahead and take these educated youths over." Mother Hao smiled warmly, discreetly pinching Father Guo's arm to remind him to play along. Her gaze at Chen Qingjuan was very kind, like a mother-in-law sizing up a prospective son-in-law, liking what she saw.

"Follow me, everyone."

Guo Pushu led the way. Chen Qingjuan instinctively turned and walked beside her, leaving others to lag behind.

Everyone knew about their "entanglement" and deliberately kept their distance to give them space.

Looking at Chen Qingjuan like this, they didn't think it was just Guo Pushu's one-sided crush. If he had no feelings, he wouldn't be following her step by step. This wasn't the usual aloof Chen Qingjuan.

"Ouch, ouch, ouch! Woman, why do you have to pinch so hard?"

As soon as the group left, Father Guo winced, rubbing his arm. His heart was full of bitterness.

"Don't start with me. What were you thinking just now? If you mess up Xiao Liu's chance to snag this son-in-law, I'll hold you accountable." Mother Hao had been with Father Guo for a lifetime and had learned some words. She could speak with a bit of elegance now.

Of course, this only applied when she wasn't out picking fights. Otherwise, her words came like a machine gun, a rich vocabulary of insults leaving the target no chance to interrupt—guaranteed to make anyone cower.

Father Guo was defiant. "I'm her father! This kid came and immediately charmed Xiao Liu. Now I can't even be angry? What kind of logic is that? It's unreasonable!"

"What charm? Watch your mouth. Your daughter is the one who set her eyes on his face." Mother Hao ignored his discomfort and went back to her work. "Hurry up, stop dawdling. Finish weaving that bamboo mat and send it to the eldest." She returned to her low stool to continue making shoes. Despite her rough appearance, her needlework was good.

Father Guo shook his head, knowing he couldn't win. Better to just get back to work.

·

On the way, Guo Pushu and Chen Qingjuan walked side by side.

Chen Qingjuan was naturally quiet and reserved. Right now, he desperately wanted to ask Guo Pushu about that note, but with others present, he couldn't bring it up.

"Chen Qingjuan, why do you smell so good?" Guo Pushu asked bluntly, tilting her head to look at his handsome profile with a meaningful smile. "Could it be that you dressed up just to impress me?"

She was always like this, hitting the nail on the head and exposing Chen Qingjuan's hidden thoughts, but he couldn't admit it. He stubbornly denied it in a faint voice, "Nothing of the sort, Comrade Guo, don't overthink it. I just worked hard today and don't like being sweaty, so of course I had to shower."

"Oh, is that so..." Guo Pushu drew out her tone, her light voice filled with self-assurance. "But it doesn't matter. Since you came to see me, I'll take it as you dressed up for me. Besides, you're even more handsome now. If you went out like this, you'd be snatched up like a hot pastry."

There were plenty of people who only cared about a pretty face and a good figure. Take her, for example—if she wanted something, she could get it herself. With her material needs met and nothing lacking, her spiritual needs naturally surfaced. Of course, she would pay for a face she liked! There were many in the county like this too.

While some people were working themselves to the bone, others were already wearing nice clothes, with no worries about food or clothing, spending their days thinking about whether to watch a movie or browse the department store. The gap between people was destined from birth.

Every era was like this. Suffering always fell hardest on the lower class, while those at the top might face a slight reduction in prosperity, but they could still live comfortably.

"I'm not a hot pastry." Chen Qingjuan only refuted the latter part of her statement this time, murmuring softly, "Only you would think of me as one."

Guo Pushu heard him but still asked again, "Chen Qingjuan, what did you say? Oh dear, my hearing comes and goes. Next time, could you speak a little louder? Preferably right next to my ear, like whispering, so I'll catch it clearly and won't have to ask again."

Chen Qingjuan's face reddened. This person really could turn even the simplest sentence into something mushy. That was quite a talent.

"Who would want to whisper in your ear?" But because of Guo Pushu's words, the corners of his mouth lifted, though he still retorted pretentiously, a little contrary in his stubbornness.

"You would! Or do you want me to whisper in someone else's ear?" Guo Pushu sighed mournfully. "That breaks my heart. I only want to whisper with Comrade Chen, yet he tells me to do it with others. Does Comrade Chen think I'm that kind of casual person?"

Her tone was a bit disappointed, and Chen Qingjuan's heart skipped a beat. He quickly said, "That's not what I meant. I didn't mean for you to whisper in anyone else's ear." Just the thought of that scene made him uncomfortable, but he dared not admit it.

He looked at Guo Pushu, catching the teasing glint in her eyes, and realized she was deliberately provoking him. Chen Qingjuan pressed his lips together. He thought himself not stupid, but every time he talked to her, he fell into her traps.

"So, does Comrade Chen mean you're willing to whisper with me?" Guo Pushu smiled as she turned the question back on him.

This time, Chen Qingjuan didn't answer her. He just quickened his pace and walked ahead alone.

But as he walked, he worried about leaving too far behind, so he slowed down again. Then his shoulder was tapped. Guo Pushu walked unhurriedly beside him, teasing, "Comrade Chen, are you too shy to answer me directly? It's okay. You can write me a love letter to read."

This person was too much! Chen Qingjuan clamped his mouth shut, turned his head away, and decided to ignore her.

It's fine to know it in your heart, why say it out loud...

The others behind them watched the two whispering ahead. Chen Qingjuan kept getting flustered, his face reluctant but his body honest. They felt oddly full even though they hadn't had dinner.

·

They arrived at the house they were going to rent. The location was good—close to neighbors, and only a short walk up a small slope and past a few houses to the village head's home.

Guo Pushu took out the key, opened the door, and entered. The small square courtyard was fairly spacious, and the rooms were tidy, though a bit empty and deserted from being uninhabited.

There were no weeds in the yard either. During the slack season, the Guo family would come to clean and weed, so there was only a little dust.

"These are the six rooms. Divide them however you like." She remained impartial and didn't pick one specifically for Chen Qingjuan.

Besides, what she chose was only what she thought was good. It wasn't for her to live in; it was for Chen Qingjuan, so he should make his own choice.

The rooms were all the same size, just with different lighting. But before building, the villagers had consulted feng shui for the direction, and although it wasn't openly allowed now, it still happened privately, so each room had similar lighting.

After discussing, Deng Yangchun and another female comrade chose adjacent rooms. On this side were four rooms, with one in between. Chen Qingjuan chose the room near the wall.

On the opposite side were two rooms, separated by a small side room, suitable for two couples. They quickly settled on the arrangement.

For a house with such a layout, the original owner must have been quite wealthy back then. But decades ago, someone in the family who went out to seek fortune got hooked on opium and squandered everything, leaving only this house, with the old and young guarding it.

In the 1950s, the owner of the house unfortunately died, and the elderly passed away, leaving the house empty.

"Since you've chosen, go check out your own rooms, clean up, and buy whatever you need to decorate." Guo Pushu wasn't going to lead them by the hand.

But she turned to Chen Qingjuan and said, "Comrade Chen, the window in your room is a bit broken. The village was planning to have some young men fix it after the autumn harvest. Now that you're moving in, let me go take a look and help you repair it."

She led Chen Qingjuan inside and thumped the door shut, cutting off the view. Alone together in a room, Chen Qingjuan's body tensed up.

As for the others, they had already pushed open the doors to their rented rooms and didn't notice. Even if they did, they pretended not to.

What could they say? That it was wrong? It wasn't a problem. If it was mutual, could they force Chen Qingjuan if he didn't want it?

Besides, if they spread rumors, they'd have no peace in Shankou Village. The Guo family would skin them alive.

And if Chen Qingjuan stood up and said they were dating, what good would it do the gossips?

Of course, they weren't that kind of person. But one couldn't rule out the possibility of someone with a loose tongue. The world was full of strange things.

"Comrade Guo, what are you doing?" Chen Qingjuan wanted to open the door, but Guo Pushu grabbed his hand and held it. His heart raced, and he could only stare fixedly at the door, not daring to look at her. His voice, trying to be proper, betrayed a hint of panic. "Men and women should not touch. Comrade Guo, please let me go."

"Comrade Chen misunderstands. I was just getting a cobweb off your clothes." This time, Guo Pushu obediently let go, which caught Chen Qingjuan off guard. She didn't make a move, and he could only mutter dryly, "Thanks."

But in the enclosed space with just the two of them, Chen Qingjuan clenched his fist and blurted out, "Comrade Guo. I read your reply. I'm sorry, but I can't agree to it."

Comrade Guo might be acting on a whim, but if this happened, as a man, he could deny it and get away with it without any evidence, taking advantage for nothing. But for a female comrade, it would ruin her reputation, and she'd be left speechless.

This kind of reckless behavior wasn't about having fun. In reality, it was never friendly to women—whether in terms of reputation or physical consequences, the burden fell on them. He couldn't indulge in this nonsense with her.

If he nodded without thinking and went hand in hand into the woods, he wouldn't even be showing her respect. She wasn't someone to be treated casually, and Chen Qingjuan wouldn't be so foolish as to cross that line with her.

"Can't agree to it?" Guo Pushu looked puzzled, but Chen Qingjuan didn't see it. He nodded. "Yes, I'm sorry, but I can't."

"Comrade Guo, inviting a male comrade into the woods isn't a sign of freedom or boldness. It's a lowly act of disrespect and lack of self-love."

Chen Qingjuan's face burned at the mention of "the woods," but when he got to the latter part, he turned to face Guo Pushu seriously. "I know this sounds harsh, like I'm lecturing you, and it might make you unhappy. But some things aren't about being feudal and conservative."

No matter how reckless, one could never use "I don't care who I give my body to" as an excuse to descend into self-indulgence. That would be the beginning of self-destruction.

He had come mainly to talk to Guo Pushu about this, not to meet her in the woods.

"What? The woods?" Guo Pushu was confused by his declaration. Then it clicked, and she figured something out.

She crossed her arms and laughed. "Chen Qingjuan, don't tell me you thought the drawing on my reply meant I wanted to meet you in the woods for some... outdoor fun."

Chen Qingjuan had already been very euphemistic. In the past, he wouldn't have even said "the woods" out loud. But now, hearing Guo Pushu use the even more explicit term "outdoor fun," his face flushed with embarrassment.

"Wasn't it?" He was a bit confused. Earlier, Guo Pushu had mentioned "the woods," so when he saw the drawing of a forest, it was natural for him to make the connection.

"Chen Qingjuan, your mind isn't clean. Who would have thought that someone so cool and aloof on the surface is like a salted duck egg on the inside?" He was so amusing, and he seemed so serious about it—but it proved he was a good person. Guo Pushu laughed heartily. "My drawing meant that I've received your apology and forgiven you. Nothing else, no hidden meanings."

Ah... So it wasn't about the woods? Chen Qingjuan was stunned. Then embarrassment crept over him. He protested a bit indignantly, "Then why did you draw those two little figures so... close?"

"To show that I forgive you, that I'm not upset about you yelling at me, and that I'm willing to be close to you. The misunderstanding happened in the woods, so of course I drew a forest. What's wrong with that?"

Guo Pushu spread her hands, her sharp eyes fixed on Chen Qingjuan, making his heart race. Then she guessed slyly, "Could it be... that deep down, you've been thinking about taking me into the woods all along? That's why you showered, changed clothes, and dressed up before coming to see me. Renting the house was just an excuse."

Chen Qingjuan bristled. "I did not!"

"Reacting so fast and so strongly—that's a sign of guilt." Guo Pushu walked over with a smile, and Chen Qingjuan backed away step by step until he hit a wooden chair. Guo Pushu's fingertip traced down his chest as she chuckled. "Chen Qingjuan, so you really want to go into the woods with me. If I don't grant your wish, would that make me a bad person?"

"I don't." Through his clothes, the touch of her fingertip sent tingles across his chest. As she closed in, he couldn't bring himself to push her away, and he had nowhere to retreat. He fell into the chair, bashful, and looked up at her, dazed as she leaned over.

The dream from noon flashed through his mind—the one that had been haunting him—and now it felt even more vivid. Was she going to kiss him again, like in the dream?

Fortunately, he had bathed and didn't smell of sweat, and before coming, he had brushed his teeth and washed his face again, dressed up entirely—she probably wouldn't find him gross.

"Guo Pushu, don't do this… it's not right…" Scared but low-key hoping she might actually kiss him, Chen Qingjuan turned his head away, gripping the armrests tightly, his heart thumping loudly.

"What am I doing? Did you think I was going to kiss you? Kissing… should be done like this."

Guo Pushu was up to no good. She hooked her fingers into Chen Qingjuan's buttons, undoing one, then another… until his collar opened, revealing his elegant collarbone.

"Guo Pushu!" Chen Qingjuan was shocked by her audacity, grabbing her unruly hand, his face flushed as he whispered sternly, "There are people outside! How can you be so crazy? What if someone sees us!"

Guo Pushu raised an eyebrow with a smile. His flushed face was like fine porcelain with a thin glaze – really beautiful. "So you mean, as long as no one is around and no one sees, we can continue?"

"…" So she really wanted to act shamelessly, eager to have her way with him, right? Chen Qingjuan's brow twitched, his eyelids fluttering downward as he bit his lower lip lightly, avoiding her gaze. "That's not what I meant. This is wrong—only husband and wife should do this. And you're still young; it's unhealthy."

He was only a year older than Guo Pushu, but his personality was more mature and by the book, making him seem several years older. Even in the heat of summer, he buttoned his shirt all the way to the top.

"Oh, so you're that eager to marry me? Fine, I'll go home right now and tell my parents to check the calendar for an auspicious day to make it happen." Guo Pushu said it as if she would actually do it.

Wasn't the point clear enough? How did it jump to that? Chen Qingjuan was dumbfounded. Who was the impatient one here? He had never seen such a bold girl!

He almost wanted to give in and go along with her—it wasn't that he was unwilling; he would certainly take responsibility. But this kind of thing had to be between husband and wife, and they should wait until they were older. Otherwise, knowing how irresponsible Guo is, once she got what she wanted, she would probably lose interest.

"Hurry up, quit messing around. Take off your clothes." Guo Pushu withdrew her hand and glanced at the broken window. The evening glow was deepening; it was getting dark.

She… she really couldn't wait. Chen Qingjuan felt anxious, like he was being grilled. His fingers fumbled slowly over the buttons, hesitating whether to take them off.

"Geez, let me do it." Seeing him acting like a shy little bride, Guo Pushu rolled her eyes. She pressed down on his resisting hand and said firmly, "Don't move. Hold onto the armrests."

"O-okay…" Chen Qingjuan's face grew even redder. He obediently gripped both sides and let Guo Pushu take off his shirt. He was so tense his body stiffened. Without the shirt, he wasn't skinny or bony; on the contrary, he had a great physique—broad shoulders, a narrow waist, and a thin layer of muscle.

Dressed, he had a cool, reserved image. Undressed, with a shy expression, he looked like a lamb to the slaughter.

"You…" Chen Qingjuan's heart pounded as if about to burst out of his chest. His Adam's apple bobbed, his breath quickened, and his chest heaved. Above his waistband, the muscles on his stomach were faintly visible. He forced out the words, repeating, "This is something only husband and wife can do. We… we need to be rational, not cross the line."

His clothes had been taken off without much resistance, yet at this point, his mouth was still stubborn. Was this the whole 'no means yes' routine?

Guo Pushu traced his collarbone, moved behind him, and gave a crisp slap on the red mark left by the carrying pole. It made him flinch in pain. "So the educated youth Chen calls himself pure, huh? I just asked you to take off your clothes to apply medicine, to prevent blisters so you can carry loads tomorrow. What kind of dirty thoughts were you having?"

Soon, Chen Qingjuan caught the smell of medicine and felt the cool sensation of it being applied to his shoulder. He fell silent, not sure whether he felt relieved or disappointed.

But he realized Guo Pushu had played him again! She could have just said it was for applying medicine, but she deliberately didn't, just to watch his whole reaction.

"I can do it myself." Chen Qingjuan wanted to put his shirt back on. Being shirtless made him really uncomfortable, and when Guo Pushu's hand touched his skin, he became even more tense, like tiny sparks were popping there. It didn't hurt, just tickled, making him want to move.

"Don't move! You don't have eyes on the back of your head. How can you apply it yourself? You'll just waste the medicine by smearing it blindly." Guo Pushu snapped, and Chen Qingjuan dared not move again.

There was no real injury on his shoulder, just some chafed skin, and because it had been rubbed in the same spot for too long, it looked a bit red and puffy. The medicine stung a little.

"Chen Qingjuan, I've noticed something." Guo Pushu finished applying the medicine but didn't say it directly.

She bent down, close to his ear, like she’d read his little secret. "Actually, you really enjoy excitement—strictly speaking, not excitement, but a feeling of breaking loose. You said people outside shouldn't fool around, but there was no resistance in your eyes—there was even anticipation."

Chen Qingjuan's eyes widened slightly. Freaking out, he stood up and turned around to put on his shirt.

"I've already seen the house. Let's go back." His hand touched the door when he heard Guo Pushu from behind.

"Hey, Chen Qingjuan, do you want to go out with me?"

She'd already told him she liked him, and her meaning was clear, but she had never explicitly asked this question.

And they had only known each other for a few days. Was starting a relationship really that easy?

Chen Qingjuan was stunned, his mind buzzing, with only Guo Pushu's words echoing in his head.

He opened the door, and under the moonlight breaking through the dark clouds, he hurried away.

The others were already waiting in the yard, talking about going there at noon tomorrow to clean up and move their things in the evening.

When they saw Chen Qingjuan come out with a slightly off expression, and Guo Pushu following behind, closing the door, no one dared ask. They stayed quiet the whole way back. Better for outsiders to keep out of matters of the heart.

In the end, back at the village chief's house, they paid the money and returned to the educated youths' compound.

Chen Qingjuan also went back to his bunk. The others were busy with their own things. When they saw him come in, no one spoke to him—they weren't familiar.

Feeling a bit stifled by the heat—whether from the air or his inner agitation—Chen Qingjuan went to wipe down his body with the remaining water again, then lay on the bed in his pajamas, holding a fan and waving it, but the breeze couldn't dispel his restlessness.

Now calm, he recalled his response from earlier.

"Sorry, I don't want to go out with you. I don't like you, I even hate you. Can you stay away from me from now on?"

He hadn't even had the courage to look back at Guo Pushu's expression.

·

Chen Qingjuan couldn't sleep.

He lay flat, his eyes vacant, staring at the roof beam. His heart felt squeezed, beating slower, making it hard to breathe. His eyes ached, as if his eyes were filled with tears behind his eyelids, uncomfortable. They spilled over, and a few tears escaped.

Having said such harsh and hurtful words, she would surely go from liking to disliking him, and soon leave.

But leaving was also good. At least she wouldn't come into contact with him and face misfortune later.

Chen Qingjuan raised his hand to cover his eyes, biting his lower lip. Between his fingers, a droplet seemed to fall.

The night was the perfect cover for weakness.