Chapter 87 I Told You You Can Really Learn Things Online…

Chapter 87 See? I Told You You Can Actually Learn Stuff Online (24...

Lin Jianyuan’s jaw nearly hit the floor. "No, you—babe, why... why are you putting condoms on eggplants and bananas...?"

Roommate: "Because I searched for 'condoms' on Little Red Book, and a lot of eggplants and bananas came up. I didn't quite get it, so I just followed the tutorial and tried it out."

Lin Jianyuan: "Ohhh, no wonder..."

Still Lin Jianyuan: "What???"

What??

What?????????

Why would you search for "condoms"???

His pure, innocent, naive wife, utterly clueless about human depravity!!!

How could she go search for "condoms" on Little Red Book?!?!?!

Roommate: "Because you were talking about it in your sleep."

Bang!

It was like an atomic bomb exploded in Lin Jianyuan’s head.

His entire body flushed crimson from head to toe in an instant.

"Me? Huh? No?" Lin Jianyuan was a mix of mortified and flustered, so embarrassed he wished he could just disappear. "No, how, how did... huh? Did I talk in my sleep???"

Mystery solved.

He must have said something in his sleep, which led his roommate to hear the term "condoms."

The curious cutie directly searched for it on Little Red Book. Of course, the first part, "jiba," definitely didn't yield results, so only "condoms" came up.

And they were all very straightforward educational content.

The most eye-catching among them were the tutorials using eggplants and bananas as demonstrations.

Roommate: Although I don’t understand why we need to put protective covers on eggplants and bananas, since so many people liked, saved, commented, and shared, it must be very useful knowledge.

Might as well try it first.

Lin Jianyuan almost cracked up after hearing about his roommate’s little investigation.

He asked, caught between laughter and tears, "Then what about 'jiba'?"

He was too curious about how his wife, who only understood the digestive system, interpreted reproductive system accessories.

Roommate: "'Jiba' probably means 'a lot'?"

The roommate pulled open a drawer—it was stuffed with 0.01s, ribbed, glow-in-the-dark...

Roommate: "But we don’t have that many eggplants and bananas at home. Buying this many would be a total waste."

Lin Jianyuan: "..."

Lin Jianyuan burst out laughing.

The roommate gradually began to figure it out and asked, puzzled, "Isn’t that right? So what are 'condoms'? Why put these plastic covers on eggplants and bananas?"

"Wife..." Lin Jianyuan couldn’t take it anymore. He reached out, scooped his wife into his arms, and pressed his sweet, soft wife against his chest, holding her tight. "Ah, wife, how can you be this adorable, wife... I can’t handle it, you’re so cute I’m gonna kiss you to death!!!"

Roommate: "?"

Lin Jianyuan’s lovesick brain went wild.

He held his wife, kissing and cuddling her, and finally calmed down from the sudden lovey-dovey burst.

He apologized seriously to his roommate: "Babe, 'condoms' is actually a crude term. Sorry, that’s just the dirty thoughts in my head."

Roommate nodded: "It really is dirty."

Looking at his roommate’s clueless, "alien trying to learn human ways" expression, Lin Jianyuan felt both heartache and amusement.

But more than that, he felt warm and fuzzy. His heart was melting like it was soaking in a hot spring.

He leaned in and pecked his roommate's cheek, saying gently, "Babe, just be yourself. No need to force it... uh, try so hard to act human."

What kind of phrasing was that?

He laughed at himself just saying it.

The roommate also laughed: "I’m not forcing it. It’s not hard. And it’s pretty fun."

Lin Jianyuan imagined the scene of his roommate seriously slipping condoms onto eggplants and bananas while following Little Red Book tutorials.

He burst out laughing again.

I can't take it, really I can't take it.

How can his wife be so adorable, hahahaha.

Late at night.

Lin Jianyuan got out of the shower, changed into clean pajamas, and came out to see his roommate lying on the pillow, scrolling through Little Red Book again.

His roommate really loved browsing Little Red Book.

Remembering the "condoms" incident, Lin Jianyuan couldn’t help but laugh again. He jumped on the bed, hugging his roommate and wrestling playfully.

"Stop fooling around, hahaha... my phone! My phone’s gonna fall!"

"It’s fine if it breaks, we’ll get a new one... babe, give me a kiss."

"Mwah!"

"Another one."

"Okay. Mwah!"

"Kiss me here. On my cheek."

"Mwah!"

"Ah, you little kiss fiend. How come you love~ kissing so much~"

"You’re the one who told me to kiss!"

"So, do you like it or not?"

"I do. I really like it."

His boyfriend showed how much he liked it with his actions.

From the lips, to the tip of the nose, to the eyes, to the forehead.

Kissing every inch.

Then back again.

Lin Jianyuan listened to his own heartbeat go from ba-dump, ba-dump.

To ba-dumpba-dumpba-dumpba-dump!

...Holy shit.

He and his boyfriend had already kissed nearly a hundred thousand times.

How could he still get his heart racing wildly from kissing!

The couple cuddled and lingered on the bed for a while longer before Lin Jianyuan got ready to sleep.

As usual, he glanced at his phone before bed—ever since getting together with his boyfriend, his phone usage had drastically decreased.

It felt like all his interest and attention were on his boyfriend; even his phone had become less entertaining.

But he still needed to check WeChat occasionally.

Sure enough, as soon as Lin Jianyuan opened WeChat, he saw countless unread messages.

Pei Shuo had already told their other old colleagues that he really did have a wife.

The old colleagues collectively blew up the chat, spamming him with question marks and exclamation points.

The main points of the question marks and exclamation points were two:

1. Why did he only show his wife to Pei Shuo and not bring her to show them?

2. Why did he only help Pei Shuo with overtime? Why not treat everyone equally and help them with overtime too!!!

Lin Jianyuan replied right in the group chat.

He replied with a huge grin spreading across his face again.

After replying to the old colleagues’ messages, he noticed that an unexpected person had also messaged him.

Dr. Cen: How have you been lately?

Dr. Cen: You should be out of medication by now. Do you have time to come for a follow-up?

Lin Jianyuan was a bit surprised.

He genuinely hadn’t expected Dr. Cen to reach out to him. Dr. Cen really was a caring and responsible doctor.

Recalling Dr. Cen’s encouragement and help before, Lin Jianyuan immediately rush-ordered a thank-you banner.

He planned to give it to Dr. Cen when he went to 700 Jiangchuan North Road tomorrow.

Feeling happy is the best motivation for waking up in the morning.

The next day was Lin Jianyuan’s day off work. There was no training or lectures at the Management Bureau, and no shifts scheduled for today.

But his boyfriend had to go to work.

One of them was in the Containment Department, the other in the Field Operations Department.

The work of a prison guard and a criminal police officer were different, and so were their schedules.

His boyfriend needed to work five days a week, 9 to 5.

Logically speaking, if his boyfriend was working and he was on vacation, like most couples, Lin Jianyuan would drive his precious wife to work.

But between the two of them, the one who could teleport was none other than his wife.

Lin Jianyuan could only shyly enjoy being spoiled~

His boyfriend teleported him to 700 Jiangchuan North Road before work.

"Coming to the cafeteria for lunch?" They stood outside the hospital, and his boyfriend asked.

"Yeah, I’ll be there." Lin Jianyuan reluctantly held onto his boyfriend’s hand, swinging it playfully.

His boyfriend smiled: "Okay, then I’ll pick you up. At eleven? Or whenever you’re done, just call me anytime."

A warm feeling of being loved flowed through his heart.

Standing on the main road, Lin Jianyuan once again felt the urge to hug and kiss his boyfriend forever.

I can’t handle it.

My lovesick brain really needs to soak in a cold shower.

Lin Jianyuan recalled Shi Shaoning’s yelling in delirium and couldn’t help but laugh.

Finally working up the nerve to part with his boyfriend, Lin Jianyuan walked alone into the mental health clinic.

Returning to this hospital, Lin Jianyuan suddenly realized that, in the past, he had actually felt some psychological pressure about the fact that "I have a mental illness."

Now, with a different state of mind, he entered this place with real peace and only then noticed the hidden anxiety deep within.

Of course, it was also related to being poor at the time, having intense work pressure, and having an awful boss.

Not only was he "not supposed to have a mental illness," but he also "couldn’t afford to be mentally ill."

It was really too hard.

Fortunately, none of his colleagues pulled away from him because of his mental illness (except for the two jerks Jiang Chen and Yu Xiuli).

As Dr. Cen said, this was rare. Such a good colleague atmosphere really helped a lot with his condition.

The general clinic was on the second floor. Just as Lin Jianyuan was about to take the elevator, his gaze unintentionally swept around and happened to spot the bathroom not far away.

At first, Lin Jianyuan didn’t immediately realize it was a bathroom because he saw a person.

A moment later, he realized—it was his own reflection in the mirror.

To make it worse, he was looking into the women’s bathroom.

To make things even more awkward, at that very moment, a girl was standing in front of the sink, and she looked up at just that moment.

As she raised her head, her reflection in the mirror met Lin Jianyuan's eyes.

Her eyes widened.

Lin Jianyuan instinctively averted his gaze, but the image of the girl in the mirror lingered behind his eyes.

It was a tear-streaked face.

She wore light makeup, including subtle eyeliner.

But she must have been crying hard—her makeup was completely ruined.

Her eyeliner ran like black tears, smudged messily across her face.

For some reason, Lin Jianyuan couldn’t help but look again.

Sure enough, after making eye contact with him, the girl broke down completely.

...Was it because a stranger had seen her looking such a mess?

And not just any stranger—a male stranger passing by the restroom.

And they had even made eye contact.

The girl looked to be only about middle-school age, still wearing her school uniform.

Some people might disapprove of a middle schooler wearing makeup, questioning why someone so young was already dressing up.

But Lin Jianyuan didn't think much of it. Having worked in advertising and marketing, he knew that for many occasions, girls needed to wear a little makeup—like for dance performances or figure skating competitions.

Lin Jianyuan didn’t fully understand the psychology of girls, but he knew that middle school was precisely the age when they began to become more sensitive.

Or, to put it another way:

Girls at this age were no longer clueless children.

They were already beginning to reach out with tentative feelers to explore the vast world—

—yet they still lacked the life experience or resilience of adults.

So… that was probably why she was here.

In a mental health center.

Lin Jianyuan scratched his head, suddenly thinking that he had just seen the girl looking completely vulnerable, and they had even locked eyes.

The young girl was already emotionally shaken, and now this just made it worse.

Instinctively, Lin Jianyuan scanned the area, looking for a vending machine to buy some snacks, drinks, or candy.

He remembered his roommate saying the snacks here were good…

Wait.

Lin Jianyuan suddenly realized—wait, were the "snacks" his roommate mentioned even human food???

In that split second he looked away, when he looked back, the girl was now with a custodian.

She was plump, dressed in a dark blue cleaner’s uniform, and looked very kind.

She was gently comforting the young girl.

Lin Jianyuan stood watching quietly.

Until the girl’s sobs gradually subsided, and she wiped her tears before leaving the restroom with the custodian.

Only then did Lin Jianyuan leave.

He continued upstairs to see Dr. Cen.