Chapter 5

Chapter 5

Song Yun’s cries grew louder, quickly alerting the nannies in the courtyard. One entered and, seeing him in tears, immediately chastised him: “Song Yun, what are you wailing about now? This is the Young Master’s room, not your own home! You have no manners!”

Song Yun had always feared the nannies, especially those in Ruan Hang’s quarters, who were close with his mother. Fearing another complaint would reach her, he stifled his sobs, though his grievance only deepened. He bit his lip, his large eyes welling with silent tears.

Seeing this, Ruan Hang quickly interjected, “It’s alright. It was my fault; I was just teasing him.”

The nanny, accustomed to Ruan Hang shielding Song Yun, wore the same worried expression as Nanny Bai. “Young Master, forgive this old servant for speaking plainly, but you are far too lenient with him. You’ve coddled him since he was small—what will become of him in the future?”

Ruan Hang offered a few perfunctory remarks, then dismissed the nanny to rest. He turned back to Song Yun, who had calmed down somewhat. Reflecting on the afternoon’s events, Song Yun knew he was largely to blame, yet his sense of injustice was genuine. He wiped his tear-streaked eyes several times, but they remained moist.

As he dabbed his eyes, a fragrant scent wafted under his nose—the aroma of pastries. He looked closer and saw the Scholar’s Cakes from the food box, the very ones his mother had forbidden him to sneak that morning.

“Eat them. They’re all yours. I shouldn’t have teased you,” Ruan Hang said softly.

Ruan Hang understood perfectly why Song Yun was crying. Any child would feel wronged if their own mother favored an outsider. Even siblings might quarrel over parental affection, yet Song Yun had grown up witnessing his mother’s frequent partiality towards the Young Master, often swallowing his hurt in silence.

At times like this, Ruan Hang’s heart always softened completely.

With the salty taste of tears still on his lips, Song Yun lifted his tear-filled eyes to Ruan Hang, then opened his mouth and took a bite of the offered pastry. The pastry was sweet, fragrant, and soft. As he chewed, mixing it with his tears, he felt a great sense of comfort.

Realizing he had gone too far by making the Young Master apologize, Song Yun hung his head, sniffling remorsefully. “Young Master, I was wrong.”

“When will you learn some sense?” Ruan Hang sighed lightly, settling Song Yun into a seat before taking one beside him. After a moment, he continued, “How could a mother not love her own child? Don’t you know that your mother favors me so that you can have a better life here with me?”

Song Yun stared wide-eyed at Ruan Hang, seemingly taking a moment to grasp his meaning before a look of understanding dawned on his face. Then, as if another thought struck him, he hastily added, “No, Young Master, my mother truly cares for you too.”

“I know that,” Ruan Hang smiled. “I’m just telling you, don’t feel wronged by such things in the future. If your mother ever forbids you from eating something again, just say I allowed it. Won’t that do?”

Song Yun chuckled sheepishly. “Who’s that greedy? You make it sound like all I do is eat!”

“Then tell me, what else can you do? I told you to study diligently and learn some characters, but you spent half the afternoon making a fuss,” Ruan Hang said helplessly.

Song Yun’s face flushed crimson. The mention of studying brought back his misery. After all, wasn’t this whole afternoon’s commotion due to studying? Books truly were the root of all evil!

Of course, Song Yun dared not voice such thoughts to Ruan Hang. Instead, he whined pitifully, “Young Master, must I really study? I truly can’t learn it. Please, spare me, I beg you!”

Ruan Hang rubbed his temples, a troubled look on his face. Sometimes Song Yun was truly a headache. How could one refuse such a pitiful, tear-streaked plea? He said, “If you can’t even recognize all the characters, how will you manage affairs in the future? What will you do if you can’t even read an account book?”

“I…” Song Yun stammered, realizing for the first time the implications for his own future. When the Young Master entered officialdom, he would no longer be a study companion. But what else could he do? It seemed the Young Master had already considered this for him, yet was troubled by his own lack of aptitude…

Even if Ruan Hang wished to promote him, Song Yun would likely be unequal to any significant task, incapable of handling anything well.

This realization also troubled Song Yun. He scratched his dull head, unable to bring himself to falsely promise diligence in his studies, yet unwilling to disappoint Ruan Hang further.

Thinking it over, he truly felt useless. No wonder his mother often scolded him. Among Mei Xue, Zhu Shuang, and the others, Song Yun was the worst at studying and not particularly skilled at serving either. He seemed truly good for nothing. It was no wonder that when they were assigned duties upon entering the manor, neither the Eldest Young Master nor the Third Young Master had wanted him. In the end, he had only burdened Ruan Hang…

Song Yun felt deeply apologetic and was about to say something, but Ruan Hang sighed first. “Never mind. If you can recognize a few characters, I’ll consider myself blessed. Go fetch dinner.”

Song Yun felt as if he had been granted a great pardon. He let out a huge sigh of relief. Fetching dinner, he could certainly do. He quickly ran off.

The Ruan family’s meals for their masters were lavish, far more than a single person could ever finish. Leftovers were usually given to favored servants. However, with Ruan Hang, because Song Yun always shamelessly drooled while serving him, Ruan Hang eventually just let Song Yun eat with him.

Logically, having grown up alongside the Young Master, Song Yun should have been accustomed to fine food. Yet, inexplicably, he remained perpetually ravenous, marveling at every dish as if he had never seen such delicacies before. No wonder he still cried over pastries at his age.

Still, his gluttony had its benefits. Ruan Hang always found his appetite improved watching Song Yun eat. Song Yun was not picky at all; he always had only good things to say about food. If he found a dish particularly delicious, he would praise it to Ruan Hang, making Ruan Hang feel as if that dish truly tasted exceptionally good.

So, tonight, master and servant sat opposite each other, eating. Having missed their afternoon snacks due to the commotion, Ruan Hang was genuinely hungry and had a good appetite.

After dinner, Ruan Hang typically read for a while before bathing and retiring early. Ruan Hang’s bathing routine was always simple; Song Yun and the others only needed to prepare hot water, soap pods, a towel, and fresh clothes. However, Ruan Hang was very particular about cleanliness, insisting the bathing room be spotless every day—a detail Song Yun had only learned over time.

When it was time for bed, it was Song Yun’s turn for night duty. When Song Yun was little, he was very afraid of the dark, so whenever it was his turn for night duty, Ruan Hang would let him sleep by his bed.

Thus, out of long-standing habit, this night was no different. After washing up himself, Song Yun fetched his bedding from the servants’ quarters, plopped it onto the daybed opposite Ruan Hang’s bed, spread it out, and prepared to sleep.

It never occurred to him that they were no longer children. Ruan Hang was now an adult, and Song Yun himself was well into his teens, old enough to understand such matters. Although he had not yet differentiated, it was no longer quite appropriate for them to sleep in the same room.

Yet, watching Song Yun burrow into his covers as if it were the most natural thing, Ruan Hang ultimately said nothing. Though it was February, spring flowers had not yet bloomed, and the night was still very cold, especially with the continuous drizzle, making it quite chilling. It was late and the dew was heavy; Song Yun was already in bed, and it would be unkind to make him leave. Besides, the inner chamber was much warmer than outside.

Song Yun, completely oblivious, snuggled comfortably into his covers. Ruan Hang extinguished the lamp and prepared to sleep.

A while later, in the darkness, Song Yun suddenly asked, “Young Master, did you light incense?”

He remembered carefully tending the charcoal brazier before bed so it would burn until morning, keeping the room warm. This skill of tending the brazier had taken him great effort to learn, and he was glad he hadn’t forgotten it over the years. However, Song Yun was sure he hadn’t lit any incense. Ruan Hang didn’t like burning incense in his bedroom at night, only using stimulating scents like borneol when reading.

“No,” Ruan Hang replied.

“Then why does it smell so nice?” Song Yun asked, then earnestly added, “Young Master, if you did light incense, you must tell me where it is so I can look after it during the night.”

“When have you ever woken up at night?” Ruan Hang retorted rather bluntly.

“Of course I have!” Song Yun immediately retorted, though after a moment’s thought, he realized he hadn’t. But then he added, “That’s because you’ve never called for me at night! Young Master, if you don’t believe me, try it tonight. Whether you want tea, water, or anything else, I’ll be there at your beck and call.”

“You make it sound so real,” Ruan Hang couldn’t help but chuckle.

“How is it not real?” Song Yun knew he was in the wrong but felt a little indignant, his voice muffled from beneath the covers. Theoretically, one could sleep during night duty, but for a personal attendant, one shouldn’t sleep too soundly; being at the master’s beck and call was expected. Yet, Song Yun carefully recalled and found he had no memory of ever being woken by Ruan Hang in the middle of the night. Whether Ruan Hang never woke up at night, or called him but never managed to wake him, was unknown…

However, like many things he struggled with, Song Yun genuinely wanted to do well. After all, Ruan Hang treated him so kindly, and he truly hoped to make Ruan Hang’s life more comfortable. Yet, the sincere desire to do well and the reality of not doing so always seemed to clash. Song Yun quickly felt guilty again.

Fortunately, whenever this happened, Ruan Hang would always comfort him.

“Don’t worry and sleep. Nothing will catch fire,” he said.

“Oh… then I’m relieved,” Song Yun murmured softly. “But it really smells so good, a bit like sandalwood. Didn’t you smell it, Young Master? How strange…”

Song Yun heard a sigh from the bed. Ruan Hang said, “It must be my pheromones.”

Song Yun exclaimed “Oh!” in sudden understanding. Ruan Hang seemed to deliberate for a moment, then added, “You haven’t differentiated yet. If you feel uncomfortable, you can sleep in the outer chamber.”

Qian Yuan and Kun Ze typically had very strong pheromones, though they were usually masked by medicinal waters and perfumes, only released in private settings and relaxed states. Song Yun had met few Qian Yuan and Kun Ze in his life, so he had never smelled another Qian Yuan’s pheromones before.

In the darkness, he subtly twitched his nose. The scent of sandalwood indeed emanated from Ruan Hang’s side of the bed. Generally, a Qian Yuan’s pheromones carried a sense of oppression and threat, often making others feel uncomfortable and uneasy. However, Song Yun felt none of that; in fact, he found the scent very relaxing and quite pleasant. So, he snuggled more comfortably into his covers.

“No need to go out. I feel quite good,” Song Yun said, then added a random remark, “Young Master, you’re amazing…”

Ruan Hang was speechless, completely unsure what made him “amazing” or what to say at that moment. But Song Yun quickly continued, “Young Master, what do you think I’ll differentiate into?”

“I don’t know,” Ruan Hang said honestly. Such matters were fate; who could truly know, unless they were a divine doctor or immortal? If his mother had known Ruan Hang would differentiate into a Qian Yuan, she might have chosen to keep the child and sacrifice the mother; Wei Shi would not have survived.

“Whatever Young Master wants me to differentiate into, I’ll differentiate into that,” Song Yun said foolishly.

Ruan Hang chuckled. “Then I would be truly capable.”

“Mmm…” Song Yun also felt his request was a bit absurd and chuckled foolishly twice. Then he added, “Whatever I differentiate into is fine. I just want to stay with Young Master forever—as long as I can stay with Young Master, that’s all that matters…”

Song Yun mumbled drowsily, and then fell into a deep sleep.