Chapter 84: I Don’t Believe in Mending a Broken Mirror

Chapter 84: I Don't Believe in Mending a Broken Mirror

Xu Moxing dip-boiled whatever he wanted to eat, one bite at a time, enjoying his meal thoroughly without ever thinking to offer any to Su Lichen.

He didn't think they were in the kind of relationship where you feed each other.

Su Lichen watched Xu Moxing eat only the dishes he had ordered, not touching any of Su Lichen's choices. Unable to resist, he picked up a bite of Xu Moxing's favorite food—something he hadn't ordered himself—and placed it in his bowl.

Given Xu Moxing's frugal mindset, his appetite wasn't large, so he only ordered the few dishes he craved most at that moment. He liked others too, but he knew he couldn't finish them.

"Oh? Thanks."

Xu Moxing didn't eat it right away but politely thanked him.

Once Su Lichen was almost done eating, Xu Moxing asked, "Are you almost full?"

"Yeah, about eighty percent."

Su Lichen smiled at Xu Moxing, expecting him to suggest the next thing on their agenda.

"Okay, there's something I need to tell you."

Xu Moxing looked past Su Lichen's right shoulder, not meeting his eyes.

"My memory has returned. I don't know if you noticed, but it doesn't matter anymore. I've already found a new place and decided to move out. Thank you for taking care of me during this time. Just saying thanks means nothing, so I owe you one. If you ever need my help with anything, as long as it's within my ability, I'll do my best to fulfill one request."

Su Lichen's smile froze completely on his face.

"Why?"

Xu Moxing finally truly looked at him. "Why what?"

"Why are you suddenly telling me this? Didn't you pretend for two months?"

A flicker of surprise crossed Xu Moxing's eyes, and then he let out a sudden snort of laughter.

"So you already noticed? I guess I'm really not good at pretending."

"Why?"

Xu Moxing didn't want to go into his reasoning. He simply shook his head. "No reason."

Su Lichen now truly understood the pain Xu Moxing had once felt. Back then, Xu Moxing had desperately wanted to understand the "why," to actively solve the problem, but Su Lichen had refused to communicate and insisted on his own version of the truth.

Now the tables had turned. Su Lichen was the one endlessly asking "why."

He could empathize now with how much Xu Moxing must have cared about their relationship to want to dig so deep and communicate so clearly.

So much for adults knowing when to stop, huh?

He had once prided himself on being a composed, mature adult who knew when to stop, but that dignity had vanished.

At this moment, Su Lichen's mind went blank, running purely on instinct. He couldn't accept it; he had to know.

"Why stop pretending? Why burst the bubble? Can you tell me?"

Su Lichen had clearly styled his hair meticulously, yet he looked utterly haggard.

Xu Moxing took a deep breath and slowly exhaled. "You really want to know?"

He paused, thinking for a moment, then said slowly, "It's not impossible, but first, answer a question of mine."

"Ask away."

"When I lost my memory and called you, you had over six months to tell me the truth. Why didn't you?"

Su Lichen's eyes quivered involuntarily. He looked away, then lowered his gaze, pressing his lips together.

Xu Moxing immediately recognized this as Su Lichen's nervous lying habit. It seemed he had his own selfish agenda.

Xu Moxing didn't rush him, waiting for an answer.

After a long silence, Su Lichen's lips went white as he decided to tell the truth.

"Honestly, at first, it was out of pity. We had been together for so many years. I wasn't sure if I still had feelings for you back then. Maybe I had suppressed them after the breakup.

Later, I was afraid that the shock would affect your recovery from the injury, so I chose to hide it from you. Living with you day in and day out, those feelings became too strong to suppress. I gave in to wishful thinking and abandoned the idea of staying distant, and I started 'dating' you again.

My rational side hoped you'd regain your memory and recover your health, but deep down, I selfishly hoped you never would, so I could stay with you forever."

Xu Moxing just nodded after hearing this, showing no particular reaction.

He believed that Su Lichen still had feelings for him. That was normal—they were each other's first love, and they had been so good together once. It was just that later, they fell out of sync. Getting back together would have only been mutual torture, which was why they broke up.

Their breakup was caused by both of them. Right after the breakup, Xu Moxing blamed Su Lichen to some extent, thinking he was at fault.

But as time passed and he could analyze the relationship more objectively, he realized neither was completely right. They both made mistakes.

They just weren't meant for each other.

The love was real, the happiness was real, and so was the breakup caused by our differences.

"I believe what you said, because you never talked about this before. And during my amnesia, you were indeed different from before."

"Mm. I'm glad you noticed how I've changed."

Su Lichen breathed a little easier and pressed on. "Mo, can you give me another chance to win you back?"

Xu Moxing shook his head.

"No. I don't believe in second chances. It's like a job—once I quit, even if my boss calls me back promising all sorts of 'benefits,' I won't go back. The company's fundamental nature doesn't change; the flaws I couldn't stand will still be there. Going back after quitting leads to an even uglier breakup, and that's something I avoid at all costs."

"What if the boss changes? What if the new boss is considerate toward employees?"

"But you are still you. You're not a company. You can't become someone else, and I can't become someone else either. People can reform themselves, but their core personality is hard to change. I no longer have confidence in our relationship.

It sounds cliché, but in the end, we were just incompatible. Back in college, we didn't realize it that deeply. In the first few years after graduation, we were young, fearless, and didn't think things through. But now I'm truly older. I'm doing well now, enjoying being single, so let's just leave it there."

In the past, when he had been younger, love had seemed so important, and he had craved intense, fiery emotions.

But now he just wanted to live peacefully day by day.

Su Lichen fell silent.

"Then, will you answer my question from earlier? Why didn't you tell me directly once you regained your memory?"

Xu Moxing blinked. "Because I wanted to know what your hidden agenda was. You've already answered that."

Su Lichen's palms were sweaty, but he couldn't force Xu Moxing. Xu Moxing wasn't acting out of spite. He was telling the truth.

Therefore, for someone who has already made a decision, pestering doesn't prove how much Su Lichen loves Xu Moxing; it's just selfish and self-centered.

"I respect your choice. When you're free, can I take you out to eat? The restaurant I mentioned during the New Year—I still haven't taken you there."

"..."

Xu Moxing wanted to refuse outright, but seeing the pleading look in Su Lichen's eyes, he didn't say it directly. He just said, "If I have time."

Anyway, whether he was free or not was entirely up to him. If Su Lichen asked him out, he'd just say he was busy—end of story.

He wasn't in the habit of keeping in touch with exes. For Xu Moxing, after breaking up, the other person should vanish from his life. The fact that he hadn't deleted Su Lichen from his contacts this time was already a big step—he used to. That was all he was willing to do.