Chapter 3: Both Sides Feel Strange

Chapter 3: Both Sides Feel a Bit Strange

Xu Moxing thought, since there was nothing serious, Su Lichen should go back to work—money doesn't grow on trees.

Hearing this, Su Lichen calmly sat down on the stool.

“I’ve already asked my boss for leave. You just had a big fight with me, ran over here, and then something this serious happened—I can’t just leave you be.”

What Su Lichen didn’t say was that before they broke up, Xu Moxing had already stopped actively contacting his own parents.

Whenever something happened to Xu Moxing, asking his family for help never even crossed his mind.

If Su Lichen didn’t stay to take care of him, knowing Xu Moxing always tried to tough it out alone instead of asking for help, he would definitely choose to be alone in the hospital.

Hearing that from his boyfriend, Xu Moxing felt like a kid who just got candy—totally satisfied and happy.

He wanted to get a little affectionate with his boyfriend, but since they were in a hospital, he held himself back.

“Tell me about our five years together?”

Xu Moxing was curious. They had been together for two years when he was twenty-two, plus the five years he didn’t remember—that meant they’d been together for seven years?

Xu Moxing figured he probably deleted Su Lichen’s contact info because of the seven-year itch.

Su Lichen just left out the breakup and talked to Xu Moxing the same way he always had.

“We’re just like any ordinary couple—we lived together, went to work during the day, and spent our evenings in the rented apartment.”

Xu Moxing nodded, his eyes sparkling. “Being able to support myself and having a lover by my side—I must have been very happy these five years.”

Su Lichen looked at the beaming Xu Moxing and felt like they were back in college. When they were together, Xu Moxing had been so innocent, cheerful, sincere, and clingy—he relied on Su Lichen, but not too much.

How had it turned out like that afterward? How had they reached the point of breaking up?

In the two months after the breakup, Su Lichen had thought about it a lot but found no answers.

Perhaps people change; after going through so much, you can't go back to being that naive.

Su Lichen's mind was racing, but he still voiced his agreement.

“Mm, mostly happy, occasionally we’d argue.”

“Arguing is normal. What couple doesn’t argue?”

Xu Moxing didn’t see it as a problem. He took Su Lichen’s hand and interlaced their fingers.

“I feel really strange right now. I don’t know if you can understand what I’m feeling.”

Su Lichen’s hand paused, but he didn’t pull away from Xu Moxing’s grip.

Just like during the stable five and a half years of their relationship, he gave Xu Moxing's fingers two tight squeezes while they stayed intertwined.

In the last half year before the breakup, Su Lichen rarely did that anymore, but facing the current Xu Moxing, he naturally made the gesture again.

“How is it strange?”

“Because in my memory, you’re only twenty-two, but now you’re twenty-seven. Even though you’re still the same person, it feels a bit unfamiliar. It's like I'm cheating with Su Lichen's twin brother who's five years older.”

That was Xu Moxing—he would share anything with Su Lichen.

“Hahaha.”

Su Lichen thought that was hilarious.

“I can understand how you feel, because I feel the same way—like I’m dating the Xu Moxing from five years ago… falling for you all over again.

Compared to the Xu Moxing of five years ago, you’ve aged a bit, lost some collagen in your face, but your expression and eyes are still like they were five years ago.”

Xu Moxing got it—Su Lichen was calling him old.

“I haven’t even complained that I woke up to find my lover five years older, and you’re already criticizing me.”

Su Lichen saw the aggrieved look in Xu Moxing’s eyes and couldn’t help but chuckle.

The two kept chatting, and at that moment, Xu Moxing forgot the irritation the weather had brought him.

In the evening, a nurse came in to change his dressing.

Xu Moxing winced in pain and instinctively looked at Su Lichen.

Su Lichen stood nearby, wanting to step forward and hold Xu Moxing’s hand, but in the end he didn’t. He looked away, not meeting Xu Moxing’s gaze.

Xu Moxing’s glance at Su Lichen was just his natural dependence on his lover. Su Lichen didn’t notice his need, and Xu Moxing didn’t think it was unusual.

The nurse finished changing the dressing quickly. Out of habit, Xu Moxing said, “Thank you, nurse.”

The nurse smiled. “You’re welcome. It’s my duty.”

Su Lichen found it funny; he had almost forgotten that Mo used to be such a funny and thoughtful guy.

After the nurse left, Xu Moxing started chatting endlessly with his lover again.

“After I’m discharged, should I go back to Shencheng with you? What about my job? No one’s looked for me after so many days missing?”

Su Lichen had already prepared an explanation. They were college classmates, joined the same club as freshmen, got to know each other and fell in love. They had many mutual friends. Even though Su Lichen hadn't kept tabs on Xu Moxing after the breakup, he still caught bits and pieces from mutual friends.

“You just quit your job, so you’re between jobs now. And we had a huge fight. Tomorrow I’ll go to the hotel first and ship your things home.”

“Mm, that works. Otherwise, the hotel will keep charging me, and I'd hate to waste my hard-earned cash.”

Su Lichen knew it—Xu Moxing was always a little money-grubber; that trait never changed.

Su Lichen smiled. “Give me your phone tomorrow so I can contact the hotel. I’ll leave the tablet for you to kill time.”

“Okay.”

Xu Moxing had no problem just handing his phone over to his lover for an entire day.

Su Lichen got up early the next morning while Xu Moxing was still asleep.

He took Xu Moxing’s phone, left the tablet for him, and left.

Xu Moxing's lock screen was still the same as ever. Su Lichen contacted everyone who knew about their relationship to make sure no one let anything slip.

“Oh my god, how can Mo Xing be so unlucky? That’s terrible. I’ll keep it secret, don’t worry!”

At this point, Xu Moxing's habit of always spilling his guts to Su Lichen turned out to be useful.

Even after being apart for nine months, Su Lichen could still remember who was aware of their relationship.

Some mutual friends also knew Xu Moxing's rental address, so Su Lichen paid the landlord an extra six months' rent and told the landlord to contact him if anything came up.

That way, if Xu Moxing ever regained his memory and couldn't accept the situation, he would at least have a place to go.

Su Lichen shipped some of Xu Moxing's personal belongings back to his own home in Shencheng, beginning to create the false impression that they were still living together.

Fortunately, Xu Moxing's lost memories began from when he started working, so many things could be plausibly explained—after all, Su Lichen could just make up anything about those five years.

A few days later, Xu Moxing was discharged from the hospital.

The days-long prolonged humid spell (known as huinan tian) had also vanished; on the day of discharge, the sun was bright and the humidity was just right.

Xu Moxing no longer felt unwell. He sat in a wheelchair while Su Lichen pushed him, leaving Yangcheng and returning to Shencheng—a city familiar yet strange in his memory.