Chapter 155: Extra: A Lover’s Daily Life – Honeymoon

Chapter 155 Extra: Lovers' Daily Life - Honeymoon

Xu Moxing's passport was something Su Lichen had pestered him to get when he renewed his ID card, saying he wanted to take him abroad for trips, but they never had the time.

Besides, neither of them had much interest in foreign countries—they had more than enough to explore in their own country.

Su Lichen did occasionally travel abroad for work, and his family had taken him on overseas trips before, but he had never gone abroad with Xu Moxing.

Since it was a honeymoon, they wanted to go somewhere special, so they simply got visas and went abroad.

It was Xu Moxing's first time leaving the country, and everything felt novel to him.

Traveling abroad was very different from domestic travel—after all, the language, writing, and culture were all completely different.

If he had to go abroad for work alone, Xu Moxing would have made thorough preparations, like bringing a translator and mentally preparing himself.

But with Su Lichen by his side, he didn't need to use his brain at all.

After all, no matter how much he prepared, it couldn't compare to having Su Lichen, who had plenty of overseas experience and was a walking translator, right at hand.

Xu Moxing really couldn't help much with the overseas trip; at most, he could look up foods he wanted to eat. Everything else was handled entirely by Su Lichen.

Usually, when they traveled domestically together, they would plan the itinerary together, discussing and customizing it. But this time, Xu Moxing was truly willing but unable to contribute.

In the end, Xu Moxing just had to follow Su Lichen, and Su Lichen experienced the long-missed feeling of being completely relied on by his lover.

Back home, Xu Moxing no longer depended on Su Lichen as much. Their relationship now had no major issues—it was more about independence, with emotional mutual support, rather than the old days when Xu Moxing had almost 90% of his emotional needs resting on Su Lichen.

But nothing in the world is perfect. Not being as emotionally dependent on Su Lichen as before also meant that Xu Moxing was no longer completely under his thumb.

Xu Moxing no longer placed his sense of security on a single person but instead built his own safe haven.

Su Lichen was happy to see Xu Moxing's transformation, but occasionally he missed a little bit the Xu Moxing who once treated him as his whole world.

Maybe humans are just like that—"a bit pathetic," knowing it was wrong and that their past dynamic was a burden on both of them, yet sometimes still feeling a bit nostalgic.

These two weeks abroad gave Su Lichen a taste of that old feeling, and he quite enjoyed it.

"A Li, I want some water."

Xu Moxing looked at Su Lichen. Honestly, he was a bit intimidated—he didn't even know how to communicate with people to buy a drink.

"Let's go, I'll take you to buy some."

Su Lichen was pleased by Xu Moxing's dependent look and put an arm around him to buy water.

In the days that followed, Su Lichen reveled in Xu Moxing's repeated calls of "A Li."

"A Li, help me."

"A Li, where are you going? I want to come too. I don't want to stay by myself."

During the honeymoon, Su Lichen was absolutely thrilled because Xu Moxing wanted to cling to him for everything.

Su Lichen enjoyed this brief happiness, and Xu Moxing felt that this trip was especially delightful, though he didn't know Su Lichen's little scheme—he just assumed it was the "honeymoon" bonus effect.

"Mo, any souvenirs you want to buy?"

They had just finished eating and happened to be at a scenic spot, so Su Lichen asked.

Xu Moxing shook his head.

"I'm thinking I'll buy some food instead. I don't want souvenirs—most of these little trinkets are actually made in China."

"Okay, sounds good. The chocolate and ham here are quite distinctive; we can buy some."

"Alright."

Xu Moxing also thought the spices added to the local food were interesting and planned to buy some to take back.

On the last day of the honeymoon, Su Lichen felt a bit sad to see it end.

After all, he knew that once they returned home, Xu Moxing would no longer be as clingy as he was here.

Xu Moxing naturally noticed the shift in his mood and decided to ask him during their final meal there.

"What's wrong? You seem down today, different from the past few days. Is it because you don't want the honeymoon to end, or you don't want to go back to work?"

Su Lichen paused for a moment, thinking, then decided to be honest.

"No."

Xu Moxing looked at Su Lichen, waiting for his answer.

"It's because these past few days, I experienced our old dynamic again, and I kind of missed it and enjoyed it."

Xu Moxing raised an eyebrow, a faint smile playing on his lips.

"Back then you said I was too much, and now you're nostalgic for it?"

"Mm-hmm. Human nature is essentially double standards. Knowing I can't have both, but occasionally I'm greedy and want it all."

"There's no such thing. Light and shadow complement each other."

In the past, Xu Moxing would have doubted himself and thought about whether to change, but now he just saw it as impossible. Why should he keep changing himself just because of someone else's occasional nostalgia?

Changing back and forth wouldn't fix anything, and it wasn't necessary.

"Of course I know it's impossible. I don't want you to go back to how you were either. Just think of me as being a bit pathetic."

Xu Moxing didn't plan to change, but Su Lichen's words still made him overthink.

In the end...

Xu Moxing asked, "Do you think I'm too selfish now, that I don't love you as much as before? I put my own feelings first a lot, and I hold back."

"No, why would you think that?"

Su Lichen just occasionally felt nostalgic—it didn't mean he thought Xu Moxing's previous behavior was acceptable.

"Because I'm different from before."

Xu Moxing continued eating as he spoke, sharing the "overthinking" that Su Lichen's words had provoked.

Su Lichen put down his chopsticks and looked at Xu Moxing gravely and earnestly.

"I don't think you love me any less now. The love before was love, and the love now is love too. There's no such thing as not loving enough! Love can't be compared.

It's just that it manifests differently at different times. You've been evolving with your life experiences, and I've been evolving too. We're both dynamically changing."

If the depth of love is tied to the extent of sacrificing your own preferences and suppressing your true feelings, then I don't need that kind of toxic love."

Before, Xu Moxing's love was a "parasitic dependence"—that was what he needed and could do back then.

Now, his love is "closeness after becoming independent"—this is his choice after growing up.

This isn't "less love"; it's an "upgrade in the form of love."

It went from "I need you to survive" to "I can live well on my own, but I choose to be with you."

Isn't this love?

If it isn't, then what is love?

Do you have to sacrifice and hold nothing back just to show how much you love?

The mindset that treats "pain" and "sacrifice" as "currency of love" sounds very "romantic," but at its core, it goes against human nature.

Because it denies a person's independence and self-worth, demanding that one "lose oneself" in order to earn the "right to be loved."

If holding nothing back and disregarding one's own feelings is love, even if that kind of love could last, it would be built on the sacrifice of one person—so can that still be called "mutual love"?

True "holding nothing back" doesn't exist in reality, nor should it.

Everyone needs a private mental space that belongs to them, free from anyone else's scrutiny.

Forcing someone to hold nothing back is essentially treating the other person like a "transparent object" to possess.

You ask them to unlock all passwords, share every thought, reveal every emotion, and always be completely honest—not to understand them, but to control them.

Once you have all their "dirt," you gain absolute security and power in the relationship.

That's not love at all; it's emotional colonization.

"What you're holding back isn't love—it's your independent personality. I think that's precisely the prerequisite for you to give healthy love. Only healthy love can last.

I love you too, so I don't want our love to be built on sacrificing one of us. I hope we can grow old together with this healthy love."

Xu Moxing heard this, blinked, and felt much more at ease.

"Then why did you say you miss the past?"

"Haha, that doesn't conflict with my missing the past. I just miss it occasionally—after all, I have my selfish side too.

Occasionally, I also miss the time when I had 'complete control' over you. You're too independent now—I can't control you. I've got my dark side too, Mo."