Chapter 2: Why Did I Delete All Your Contact Information?

Chapter 2: Why Did I Delete All Your Contact Information?

Xu Moxing's memory stopped five years ago.

Su Lichen recalled the last words Xu Moxing said to him before the breakup: "If only I could go back five years, but time can't turn back."

After that, Xu Moxing left Shencheng for Yangcheng, and they lost contact.

Su Lichen stubbed out his cigarette and left the smoking area.

Back in the ward, he saw Xu Moxing on his phone.

Ever since waking up and realizing he had amnesia, Xu Moxing hadn't had time to thoroughly go through his phone.

While Su Lichen was discussing his condition with the doctor, he lay on the hospital bed and combed through his phone thoroughly several times.

There were many unfamiliar apps on his phone, even several banking apps.

After a quick glance, Xu Moxing first opened one of the social apps—QQ.

No one was talking to him.

Actually, that’s not right. It wasn’t that no one was talking—it was clearly that the app hadn’t been used in forever.

The last chat was from four years ago, a college classmate asking him, "Are you coming to the weekend gathering?"

He had replied, "Definitely, A Li and I will be there on time."

Xu Moxing froze, staring at that chat for several seconds.

Even though he had started using WeChat in college, he still loved QQ best.

Back then, he was in tons of groups—hundreds of messages a day, people posting silly memes. When he found one he liked, he'd save it right away.

He had hundreds of memes saved up, but now wasn’t the time to get nostalgic.

Xu Moxing exited QQ and opened WeChat.

As he scrolled through his contacts, he saw many unfamiliar names.

Most were labeled as 'Company – Position – Name'—like 'XX Tech – Manager Wang,' 'XX Project – Mr. Li.' He didn't recognize any of them.

He scrolled slowly, studying each one.

When he reached the bottom, he realized he couldn't find Su Lichen.

He went back to QQ and searched again. Still nothing.

Xu Moxing frowned, his finger hovering over the screen.

No phone number, and he’d deleted his WeChat and QQ contacts? Why?

He remembered that when he’d scrolled through his contacts earlier, he hadn’t found Su Lichen’s number either.

Did they have a fight? But was a fight serious enough to delete every way to reach Su Lichen?

Xu Moxing thought he might actually be capable of such a thing, because after high school, he had also deleted many people.

People who never delete contacts probably don’t get Xu Moxing, but he liked to clear out his mental space.

He invested a lot of emotion in relationships, valued sincerity, and also liked to move on.

It wasn’t about being mature—maturity doesn’t have just one look, and there shouldn’t be just one correct answer.

But Xu Moxing was curious: why would his future self delete Su Lichen?

He couldn’t think of a reason. He loved Su Lichen so much—how could he delete his lover?

Su Lichen had just been discussing his condition with the doctor, so natural, calm, and methodical—handling everything with ease—still exactly the Su Lichen he remembered.

Xu Moxing shook his head. He’d just have to wait for Su Lichen to come back and ask.

He opened his photo album.

It was nothing but work-related images.

The camera roll was full of work-related PPTs, tables, and chat screenshots.

Scrolling further down, the screenshots were also work-related.

Further down, there were finally photos—a group photo from the company’s year-end party, everyone standing in rows, him in the corner with a polite smile.

Not one thing related to his personal life.

Even when he was 22, though he wasn’t into taking photos much, he occasionally documented life.

The album used to have pictures of failed cooking attempts, or funny, interesting things he saw on dates with Su Lichen.

And there used to be tons of funny memes he saved for chats. So why were they all gone?

Xu Moxing stared at the screen, suddenly feeling disoriented.

Was this really his phone?

In just five years, had society worn him down this badly?

He opened each banking app on his phone and totaled his savings.

Six figures. He felt a little relieved.

Xu Moxing was very poor. He had always wanted to graduate early and enter the workforce so he could earn money to support himself.

It seemed like even though he’d become less excited about life, he had at least managed to save some money.

Exiting the banking apps, he opened WeChat again and carefully looked at the chat list.

The only chat he had pinned was his own.

He clicked in and saw only one message: "You can only ever rely on yourself. Stay silent. Don’t say a word."

What had happened to make him give himself that advice?

The second message was from his sister—Xu Jianqing. She had messaged him ten days ago: "Are you coming home for Qingming Festival?"

He’d replied: "No, I’m busy."

That was cold. How could his future self have replied so coldly to his sister?

His head full of questions, the ward door opened and Su Lichen returned.

Xu Moxing looked at him and once again marveled at how much more mature A Li had become. Honestly, he was really handsome.

Su Lichen walked to the bedside and glanced at Xu Moxing.

With just that one look, Xu Moxing felt something strange.

It wasn't the kind of strangeness from not knowing who he was. It was... this person seemed a bit different from the A Li in Xu Moxing's memory.

In the past, when Su Lichen looked at him, there was warmth and love in his eyes.

Now when he looked at him, it was like looking at an acquaintance—just an acquaintance—with a hint of distance.

When he approached, Xu Moxing smelled it—the scent of cigarette smoke on him.

Xu Moxing opened his mouth to speak. He had too many questions, but in the end he managed only one:

"Did you smoke?"

Su Lichen paused.

The pause was brief—maybe only half a second.

But Xu Moxing saw it.

"Yeah," Su Lichen said, "I just had two cigarettes."

Xu Moxing looked at him.

He suddenly remembered something—Su Lichen used to smoke. After they started dating, Su Lichen knew he didn't really like the smell of cigarettes, so he stopped.

Why was he smoking again now?

He wanted to ask, but couldn't find the words.

Su Lichen sat down on the edge of the bed, glanced at him, then looked away.

"Are you hungry?" Su Lichen asked him.

Xu Moxing shook his head.

Silence.

At that moment, Xu Moxing suddenly remembered that Yangcheng was in the middle of the sticky season.

The air humidity was almost 100%, and Xu Moxing felt like he couldn't breathe.

It wasn't suffocation, it was that feeling of knowing the air was full of water, but invisible, you could only feel it clogging your nose and throat.

He wanted to open the window for some air, but as soon as he opened it, the damp air rushed in like a wall, making it even more stifling than before.

His hair, skin, and even limbs felt oily and sticky due to the excessive moisture.

Birds were chirping outside the window; he didn't know what kind.

Xu Moxing suddenly said, "You're not in my phone at all."

Su Lichen looked up at him.

"Not on WeChat, not on QQ, not even in my contact list," Xu Moxing said. "There's not a single photo of you in my gallery."

He stared into Su Lichen's eyes.

"What happened over these five years?"

Su Lichen didn't speak.

He just looked at Xu Moxing, something flashed in his eyes, too fast to make out.

Su Lichen remembered the doctor's words—try not to upset the patient. He spoke: "We had a fight, you deleted all my contact information, came to Yangcheng to travel and clear your head, and then something unexpected happened."

Xu Moxing nodded, "How am I, five years later, more childish than I was five years ago? It was just a fight, it's not like we broke up, why delete you from everything?"

Xu Moxing believed Su Lichen almost unconditionally and quickly accepted his explanation.

When Su Lichen heard "broke up", he blinked slowly and said nothing.

"Then when can I be discharged from the hospital?"

Each extra day in the hospital cost more, and Xu Moxing hated to waste money.

"Just now the doctor said you still need to stay about a week, for a bit more observation, and you can leave once you meet the discharge criteria."

Xu Moxing nodded, then breathed a sigh of relief, and started worrying about Su Lichen's job.