Chapter 50: People Disdain to Talk About What They Don’t Yearn For

Chapter 50: People Don't Bother Talking About What They Don't Yearn For

The rest of the trip went smoothly, with no further surprises.

They returned home a day early.

On the last day of the trip, the two of them sat on the high-speed train—Xu Moxing by the window, Su Lichen by the aisle.

Beyond the window, the sea got farther and farther away, slowly turning into mountains, then fields, occasionally passing through tunnels, and finally into the gray, hazy buildings on the edge of the city.

When the train entered a tunnel, Xu Moxing's ears felt uncomfortable and he chewed his gum.

Xu Moxing stared out the window for a long time, then sighed.

"What's wrong?" Su Lichen asked.

"I don't want to go back."

Su Lichen said nothing.

Xu Moxing leaned back in his seat, tilting his head to look at him. "Tell me, why do people have to work?"

"To support themselves, to satisfy their desires. If you had money or another way to make a living, you wouldn't have to work."

"How sad."

Seeing he was getting upset before the holiday even ended, Su Lichen couldn't resist reaching out and pinching his cheek, which had gotten a bit plump.

Xu Moxing quieted down for a while, looked at his phone, then started chatting with Su Lichen again.

"There are no more holidays this year. The next one is New Year's Day."

Xu Moxing muttered, checking the holiday schedule on his phone calendar.

"Want to brave the crowds on New Year's?"

"What crowds?"

"The New Year's Eve celebrations."

"Yes!"

Now he had something else to look forward to, so Xu Moxing was satisfied. He leaned back in his seat and closed his eyes.

When the high-speed train entered another tunnel, his ears felt uncomfortable again, and he chewed his gum again.

Half-asleep, Xu Moxing felt a weight on his shoulder. Su Lichen had fallen asleep too, his head resting on Xu Moxing's shoulder.

He didn't move or open his eyes, and they both dozed off, leaning their heads together.

On the last day of their short break, neither of them went anywhere.

Xu Moxing refused to get out of bed, and Su Lichen didn't push him. He just leaned against the headboard, scrolling through his phone.

The curtains weren't fully closed; light squeezed in through the gap, drawing a bright line on the floor.

Xu Moxing turned over and buried his face in Su Lichen's side.

"I don't want to go to work."

Su Lichen didn't respond, just stroked his hair while looking at his phone.

With Su Lichen's gentle touch, Xu Moxing fell back asleep.

Su Lichen looked at the tuft of hair sticking up on his head and reached out to press it down.

It didn't stay down. He tried again. Still no luck.

Xu Moxing stirred, muttered something, and swatted his hand away.

There was the sound of birds outside the window—some kind of bird, he didn't know which, was chirping loudly.

A message popped up on Su Lichen's phone. He tapped to open it and saw it was from Zhou Ping.

The tone was overly "polite"—"Su, the boss wants you to follow up on that India client again."

Su Lichen couldn't be bothered to reply. He locked the screen and put the phone on the nightstand.

Light squeezed through the gap in the curtains, landing on the back of his hand. He just sat there, watching that slowly moving beam of light as it crawled from the back of his hand to his fingertips, then slipped away.

Xu Moxing was still sleeping.

After they got back, life slipped back into its old rhythm.

In the mornings, four or five alarms would go off in the bedroom, each spaced about ten minutes apart—one to wake up, another to make sure he was up, one to tell him to hurry, and one that meant he absolutely had to get out the door.

With Xu Moxing around, Su Lichen no longer needed to set his own alarms.

The subway was always packed. The office always had colleagues who loved nothing more than to watch drama unfold.

On Monday morning, Xu Moxing was organizing reports at his desk when Xiao Ke came back from the restroom looking upset.

"What's wrong?" Xu Moxing asked.

Xiao Ke didn't say anything. She sat down and started typing, the sound of her keyboard heavier than usual.

After a moment, she lowered her voice. "Did you know? Someone's been spreading rumors about us."

Xu Moxing was stunned.

"What kind of rumors?"

Xiao Ke glanced at him, hesitated, then finally said, "They're saying we're having an office romance."

Xu Moxing froze.

Him and Xiao Ke?!

All they did was have lunch together sometimes and chat occasionally—and besides, both of them were already in relationships.

How could anyone start a rumor like that?

"Who said it?"

Xiao Ke jerked her chin in that direction.

Xu Moxing followed her gaze—over there sat that male colleague who had given him a hard time when he first joined.

Zhao Yingyun, leaning back in his chair, scrolling through his phone with a smile on his face that clearly had nothing to do with work.

"How did he say it?" Xu Moxing asked.

"Just joking, saying stuff like 'You two eat together every day, is there something going on?'"

Xiao Ke imitated his tone. "And he told other people that if we're that close, something must be up."

Xu Moxing didn't say anything.

He remembered how this guy had made things hard for him before. At first, he thought he was just a smartmouth, not trying to be mean.

Later, Su Lichen taught him how to deal with it, and he shot back at Zhao Yingyun, and the guy backed down.

Xu Moxing usually had no work that required coordinating with Zhao Yingyun. He could just talk to Sister Zhong or the department head, and so they'd been getting along okay.

He didn't realize Zhao Yingyun had been nursing a grudge this whole time. Zhao Yingyun was the one who started picking on Xu Moxing from the get-go.

Zhao Yingyun is just stupid and has way too much free time. They were all working stiffs, making peanuts—it's not like we're pulling in twenty or thirty grand a month. What was there to fight about?

The boss would love it if you working stiffs fought each other. Divide and conquer—that's how management keeps you in line.

Rage welled up inside him, but he quickly suppressed it.

Forget it. Better to let sleeping dogs lie.

"Ignore him," he said.

Xiao Ke glanced at him, said nothing, and turned back to work.

At noon, they still ate lunch together.

In the afternoon, as soon as work started, Xu Moxing mulled it over, then vented to Su Lichen about Zhao Yingyun.

"That lunch buddy who's always bitching about her boyfriend told me today that Zhao Yingyun, who's been busting my chops since I started, has been spreading rumors that my lunch buddy and I are a thing. What a pathetic loser, so petty and immature."

"Someone whose mind is full of only filthy things assumes everyone else is the same. If I told him I'm gay, he'd probably lose his mind."

"And people who say there's no pure friendship between men and women—like, you see a guy and you wanna hook up, see a girl and you wanna get in her pants?"

"Some people are a different breed. Why can't some people just mind their own business? You're just doing your own thing, and they have to come and step on you."

Xu Moxing waited a while, but Su Lichen didn't reply.

Su Lichen was probably busy, so Xu Moxing just went back to work after venting.

Around 3 p.m., during the afternoon break, everyone chatted while snacking.

Zhao Yingyun decided to showboat again.

"Hey, Xiao Xu, you and Xiao Ke have been eating lunch together every day lately and chatting for a long time. Is there something going on?"

Xu Moxing had originally planned to avoid trouble and not argue with him.

Everyone was watching the show.

Xiao Ke chimed in, "Zhao, you're reading too much into it. We just click when it comes to lunch and we like to talk."

Xu Moxing's heart was racing. He played it cool and acted curious as he asked Zhao Yingyun,

"Brother Zhao, have you seen the recent news?"

"What news?"

Zhao Yingyun was confused—why was Xiao Xu suddenly asking something totally off-topic?

"The US accuses us of using slave labor to pick cotton in Xinjiang. The US war novels show our generals as drug addicts. The US claims our phones are unsafe, could blow up, or be spied on by certain people. So how do these baseless accusations even happen?

There's a saying: 'Humans cannot imagine what they have never seen.' Or, as I see it: 'People disdain to discuss things they don't aspire to.'"

The office fell silent for a moment, then Sister Zhong let out a laugh. The others also understood what Xu Moxing was implying.

He was saying that the rumors about him and Xiao Ke were fabricated, but Zhao Yingyun harbored such thoughts himself—just like the US, who accuses others of what they themselves do.

Zhao Yingyun realized Xu Moxing was clapping back, and in a pretty slick way. He didn't have the guts to say another word.

"Fine, fine, so there's nothing. No need to make it sound so serious. I never said I 'crave' that."

Xu Moxing didn't respond. Everybody broke off into their own little groups and went back to chatting.

Xiao Ke messaged Xu Moxing: "Nice one!"

Only Xu Moxing knew that his heart was still racing, and his hands were trembling uncontrollably.

He hated how gutless and pathetic he felt. He slapped his still-trembling hand and tried to look chill as he continued working.